For A Moment

By Melanie Walker

 

 

 

Blair Cramer sat in the small restaurant. Distant eyes kept interested men at bay as she sat with her cup of tea. She had finished her muffin earlier and now sat and mourned the loss of the dream she thought was going to make her life seem whole again.

 

She had left.

 

Yet again she had walked away. But this time she had a valid reason. Instead of running to hide the true parentage of the child she carried she ran to allow the man she loved, the father of her children to return home.

 

She knew. Deep down in her broken heart she knew that Todd would never return to Llanview if she was there. So she had done the right thing. She had left so that her daughter would have her father. Starr loved her daddy. Whereas she would survive without her mother in her life, Blair didn’t think Starr would function as well if Todd were never to return.

 

He had left her at the altar yet again.

 

It was beginning to become a joke in Llanview. How many times and different ways could Todd humiliate her in front of her friends and family? They were up to twice now. Blair didn’t think she would survive a third.

 

Not that Todd would even consider a third attempt an option. Once he had found out she had lied, that the baby she had carried and lost in Mexico was his he had vanished.

 

Just left town without even a word to Starr. She had never thought that he would leave without telling Starr where he was going. She knew… knew, knew, knew that he would never come back with her anywhere in its vicinity. If anything he would sneak into town and steal Starr from her again.

 

So she had walked. For whatever reason Todd was closer to Starr than she was now. That was probably her fault. She had been so wrapped up in keeping Max that she had forgotten what truly mattered. She had forgotten that the one person that would always be there regardless of who she was married to was vanishing. Turning into her newly returned father.

 

So she had given her daughter the father she needed in her life and took the mother she no longer seemed to need out of the equation. She had made a few promises to Starr that she intended to keep but she wouldn’t be the one to keep father and daughter apart.

 

She had been to see a doctor. After hearing her story he had prescribed pills. Pills to help her sleep that she couldn’t take. Pills to help her depression that she wouldn’t take. She liked being depressed. It was the first emotion in years that she could finally call her own.

 

She stirred her finger in the hot tea. It burned the skin but she never noticed. She didn’t notice a lot these days.

 

What she wouldn’t give to have the chance to go back and do it over again. Knowing what she knew. She would make different choices definitely.

 

Starr was the reason that she was in this dark and distant place. She had come here to punish herself for making Starr believe that there was any chance in hell that her parents would be happy again. For making herself and Todd believe that they could move on from their past.

 

How many times had they tried this? Tried to make a family for themselves. For their children.

 

And every time they failed miserably. Either one or both of them was definitely not cut out for this family thing. She knew Todd was a good father. He was devoted to Starr. Sometimes to devoted.

 

She knew she was a good mother. Of course that was when Todd would let her be a mother to her daughter. She couldn’t count the amount of times that Todd had taken Starr away from her in his desire to punish her for an offense against him. Either imagined or not.

 

So maybe it was just that they couldn’t be good parents together. Separately they did ok. Together they wrecked everything.

 

She was so tired of fighting him for the right to see their daughter. She couldn’t stand staying in Llanview and having Todd punish her yet again. She didn’t think she could survive another Todd Manning style retribution. So she had walked away.

 

She had promised her daughter she would keep in touch. She had promised her that someday she would return. But she couldn’t promise Starr what she wanted. She couldn’t lie to their daughter anymore.

 

She for the first time in over a year hadn’t been able to promise Starr that they would be a family.

 

**************************************************************************************

 

   Todd Manning held his precious bundle tightly in his arms. For once he held the child in his arms like he would never let him go.

 

Maybe he never would.

 

If Blair hadn’t told him the truth finally would he have ever found out? Or would she have continued to keep the truth from him under the guise of protecting him?

 

He was Todd Manning he didn’t need anyone to protect him. He didn’t want anyone to protect him. That was something he was perfectly capable of doing on his own.

 

If there was anyone that needed protecting it was Blair. Left to her devices she did stupid things… like lie to him about the true parentage of his child. Of his first born son.

 

It was depressing that the person that knew him best in the world besides himself and his daughter still didn’t know him well enough to realize that if he had a chance to get back what was his then he would lie, steal and cheat to do that.

 

He had his cover story all prepared. All he needed was Blair and Starr to tell it to.

 

“Blair?” he called walking into the living room. He frowned as he once again took in the décor. If they were going to live here instead of the penthouse they were definitely going to need to do some remodeling. He didn’t think he could handle the pinks and greens and reds anymore. Give him a good standard black and white and he was a happy man.

 

He frowned as he realized that the mansion was empty. No sounds at all emanating from the rooms above or around him.

 

“Starr?” he yelled. He dropped the bag on his shoulder to the floor and went for the stairs. God help Blair if she had taken off with his daughter. It was one thing for him to do it. It was another thing for Blair to do it.

 

Bursting into the room that Blair had been using during their stay he found nothing. The room was dark, the bed unslept in.

 

Cradling his son at his side he ripped the closet open. No clothes. Todd closed his eyes for a moment as he clutched his son to him once again. Little T.C. crying out at being held so tightly by his father. Opening his eyes again and he looked down at the son that was looking up at him with inquisitive eyes.

 

Starr had once looked at him like that. That bright, trusting look that had broken through the steel barriers he kept encased around his heart. He pressed his lips to the soft downy head and thought.

 

Would they go back to the penthouse? Starr left to her own devices would. Blair probably wouldn’t unless Starr had worn her down.

 

If they weren’t there they couldn’t have gone far. He had only been gone two weeks. It wasn’t even Thanksgiving yet.

 

“They’re at the penthouse,” he whispered in a positive tone to T.C. “They’re just at the penthouse.”

 

**************************************************************************************

 

Todd opened the door to the penthouse slowly. He was filled with apprehension walking through the front entrance. What if they weren’t here? What would he do then?

 

“Daddy you’re back,” he heard Starr call from the second level. Looking up he met his daughters’ happy eyes as she came flying down the stairs. Flinging her arms around her fathers’ waist she looked up at him with a tear streaked face. “I didn’t think you were ever coming home.”

 

“Well of course I was coming back, where else would I go?” Todd asked with a sardonic grin as he smoothed a hand down his daughters’ hair.

 

“I don’t know… you didn’t tell me that you were leaving, I was worried,” Starr grinned as she sat on the couch. Todd moved over to her, dropping his bag as he sat he eyed his daughter warily.

 

“Well you had your mom here, I’m sure she told you I was coming back… right?”

 

“Why do you have a baby daddy?” Starr said in an obvious attempt to change the subject.

 

Todd narrowed his eyes but allowed her the subject change. “This is your brother,” he said softly, turning slightly he held the baby down for her to see.

 

“Daddy… the baby’s dead, remember? You and mommy both said that the baby died.”

 

“Well we were wrong… where’s your mother? I only want to tell this story once,” Todd said looking around as he ran a hand along his sons head.

 

“She’s not here,” Starr said in a small voice as she looked away. Wringing her hands together she looked down at the floor then back over at her father.

 

“Not here? What did she go shopping or something? I mean I know it’s getting near Christmas time and all but….”

 

“No daddy… she’s gone,” Starr said looking up at her father, tears filling her eyes. “She said that you wouldn’t come home as long as she was here so she left.”

 

“Left? Where’d she go?” Todd asked in shock. He looked down at their son. The son that Blair didn’t know was alive. The son that she had chosen to hide from him.

 

“I don’t know, she said she would call and write when she got there.”

 

“And has she?” Todd asked quietly.

 

“She called yesterday… she didn’t say where she was though,” Starr leaned over. Pressing a finger into her brothers cheek he gurgled at her and she smiled down at him. “Is he really my brother?”

 

“Yeah, he really is.”

 

“What happened daddy? Why did they tell you that he died?” she asked leaning into him studying her baby brothers’ face. She had someone to spoil now. This was going to be so cool.

 

“It’s a long story. Needless to say someone neglected to tell me all the information.”

 

“Is this why you left mommy at the altar again? She cried for two days before she left… I don’t think she understood,” Starr said as she grinned at the baby.

 

“Starr,” Todd sighed. Trust Blair to make this as difficult as possible. “The next time that your mother calls… I want you to find out where she is.”

 

“But daddy,” Starr protested. “She said that if I told you where she was that she wouldn’t call me anymore.”

 

“Well then you’re not going to tell her that you told me where she’s hiding out.” Todd looked down at his daughter. “Look at it this way. The sooner I know where she is the sooner we’ll all be together again.”

 

**************************************************************************************

 

Blair punched in the numbers in the phone booth for her calling card and waited. These foreign country codes always got to her. But it had been two days since she had talked to Starr and she desperately needed to hear her little girls’ voice.

 

The computerized voice came across the line instructing her to enter her desired number and she punched in the number for the penthouse.

 

It hadn’t surprised her to find out that was where Starr had gone. She had always felt safe at the penthouse and for most of her life it had been home.

 

“Hello?” she heard her angels’ voice on the other end and she felt the first smile she’d felt in days cross her face.

 

“Hi baby,” she said softly, she twisted the phone card around her finger as she leaned against the wall of the booth.

 

“Mommy!” she heard Starr say loudly over the phone. Her excitement and happiness was contagious and she laughed. “I’ve been waiting for you to call.”

 

“Really? What for baby?”

 

“Daddy came home yesterday and he brought my baby brother with him.”

 

“What? Starr, sweetie… you know that your brother died,” Blair said quietly her smile fading as she felt the prick of sudden tears behind her eyes. She heard someone knock on the door to the phone booth behind her and she lifted her hand waving them off. Couldn’t they see that she was talking?

 

“No daddy said that they were wrong. He found out the day that you guys were supposed to get married again so he left to go get him.”

 

“Baby I know you want that to be true, but…” Blair paused taking a deep breath, steadying herself. Damn Todd… why did he have to make this so hard? “But you know that the baby died.”

 

“No mommy, daddy said that the doctors lied. He wouldn’t tell me exactly what happened but he brought the baby home and he wants you to come home now. So when are you coming?”

 

“Sweetie I’m not coming home,” Blair sighed. “Your daddy just wants me there so he has somebody to be mean to.”

 

“No he doesn’t. He was really upset when he found out you’d left again.”

 

“Hey ma’am are you almost done in there?” a young British woman pounded on the door. Blair whirled fixing a glare on her that caused her to back away. “So sorry,” she apologized.

 

“Who was that mommy?”

 

“It was nobody,” Blair muttered.

 

“Starr who are you on the phone with? I thought we were keeping the phone open in case your mother called,” she heard Todd’s voice from the other end.

 

Blair closed her eyes as she heard Starr say something, the phone fumbled through hands as Todd must have plucked it out of Starr’s.

 

“Blair? Blair is that you?” she heard Todd’s voice come across the ocean to her. She pressed fingers to her eyes as she covered the mouthpiece with her other hand. “Blair I know you’re still there… talk to me, please,” he said softly.

 

“I’m sorry,” she whispered as she moved to hang the phone up.

 

“Blair,” she heard him yell as her hand seemed to move in slow motion. “Blair damnit don’t you dare hang up!”

 

Blair sobbed as she dropped the receiver, closing her eyes momentarily she sagged against the glass. Grabbing her bags in one hand, she picked up her purse in the other pushing the door open. “It’s all yours,” she said sarcastically through her tears as she walked away.

 

**************************************************************************************

 

Blair sat at her usual table, in her usual seat drinking her usual tea. She had already finished her muffin and was contemplating her life once again.

 

Had Todd lied to her once again? He had obviously brought a baby home with him. A baby that he had told Starr was theirs.

 

So which was the truth? Was her baby boy dead? Or had Todd or someone else lied to her?

 

She had no idea what to believe anymore. She couldn’t go home. If it was a trap so Todd could keep her there for whatever he deemed suitable punishment she couldn’t do that. Hadn’t being told her baby was dead when he wasn’t suitable enough punishment for her lie?

 

“Ma’am?” she heard a male voice break through the fog she seemed to be wandering through. “Ma’am?”

 

Blair raised her eyes to meet those of an older gentleman standing in front of her table holding a scone in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other.

 

“I was wondering if I could sit at your table? Seems to be quite full in here today,” he smiled wryly at her.

 

Blair glanced around in surprise, sometime during her musings the dinner crowd had arrived, there was a loudness that she hadn’t noticed before and wall to wall people. She shrugged and waved toward the empty chair across from her.

 

“Thanks,” he said as he sat down, situating himself in front of her he extended his hand towards her. “Tyrene Zedd.”

 

She stared at him momentarily before she took his hand, shaking it quickly before she returned her hands to where they had been wrapped around her cup. “Blair Daimler.”

 

“Daimler?…”

 

“Like the car,” she muttered looking down.

 

“Actually I was thinking more like the owner of Melador,” Tyrene grinned. “My ex-wife was a huge fan of your jewelry line… she was furious when the company went out of business. You had some pretty amazing stuff.”

 

“Oh,” Blair smiled softly. “Thank you.”

 

“No problem,” he took a sip of his coffee as he studied her covertly from his lowered eyes. “So… are you here on business?’

 

“No… just taking in the sights, taking a break.”

 

Tyrene frowned as he watched her. Her hands shook slightly with tremors as she lifted her cup, her eyes were almost hollow looking. She looked like someone on the edge and he would hate to see her fall as far as he had when he’d had the same look. “Sometimes that’s all you can do,” he said softly.

 

She glanced over at him quizzically as she set her cup down hard and never noticed the warm tea sloshing out the side hitting the skin on her hand. “What do you mean?”

 

He leaned back in his chair, not bothering to hide the studious look in his eyes. “Sometimes stepping back will help you gain perspective, help you decide what to do, what chances to take, who to take those chances on.”

 

“Sometimes it’s not that easy,” she said bitterly. “Sometimes other people make those choices for you. Other people decide what should and shouldn’t be important to you. Decide what children you can and can’t raise. Decide who you can and can’t love.”

 

“Why don’t you tell me about it,” he smiled at the horrified look that crossed her face. “I’m a good listener and you look like someone who could use an impartial party right now.”

 

“I wouldn’t even know where to begin,” Blair sighed relaxing back in her chair. When he had initially sat down she had thought for sure he was somebody hired by Todd to track her down. But now he just seemed like a nice older man that was genuinely interested and concerned for her. It had been a long time since someone had been concerned for her. She almost wanted to cry.

 

“Start wherever,” he shrugged.

 

Blair looked down at her half full cup and thought. Start wherever… was that the beginning, the middle, or the end of the tragic story that was her life?

 

“You know,” she started softly Tyrene leaning across the table so he could hear her. “It’s not really all my ex’s fault. I may make it seem like that but it wasn’t. My lie started everything and my lie ended everything.” She looked up at him, meeting his eyes were her empty ones she smiled wryly. “So really this could almost all be my fault and it’s really sad in a way…”

 

“Why do you say that?” he asked as he touched her hand gently.

 

“Well because for a moment, for one brief, shining moment I had everything I had ever wanted, ever needed and then I decided to tell the truth and just like that,” she lifted a hand snapping her fingers. “Just like that I lost it all.”

 

Tyrene listened carefully as she spoke, his hand lying across hers he heard her story and never judged her. Smiling to coax information out of her, nodding in agreement with some things, squeezing her fingers for support when her courage seemed to fail her.

 

He was torn listening to her. Sometimes he wanted to beat her still unnamed ex, sometimes he wondered if maybe he wasn’t sitting at a table with an accomplished liar. Sometimes he wondered how she could be so dense as to not see that she was still in love with the ex. Everything she had done in the name of protecting him or hurting him showed that.

 

“Do you really think your ex would tell you your baby died just to get you back?” he asked stroking her fingers lightly with his thumb. She didn’t even seem to notice that she was gripping his hand she seemed lost in a place, a memory that only she could see.

 

“He would do anything to get what he wanted,” she laughed bitterly. “If he thought the only thing standing between us getting back together was my baby, the baby he thought was somebody else’s then yeah he would get rid of it.”

 

“But a baby? I mean the baby was just an innocent, it didn’t do anything wrong,” he said in a tone of disbelief.

 

“In his eyes, just by not being his the baby was an obstacle that had to be overcome. He wanted his family back together and no baby was going to stand in the way.”

  

“I’m sorry,” he said softly.

 

“Why are you sorry?” she looked up to him in surprise. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

 

“No but instead of making you feel better I seem to have made you feel worse.”

 

“I don’t think it’s possible to make me feel worse than I already do,” Blair laughed hollowly.

 

“Blair take some advice from someone who didn’t listen to advice given to me years ago and regrets it everyday now,” Tyrene stared into her eyes, willing her to heed his advice. Advice he had regretted everyday not taking when it had been his turn.

 

“What?”

 

“Go home.”

 

“What?!”

 

“Go home, you have a daughter who seems to miss you. You have a young son that’s been returned to you by some miracle and you have an ex-husband who not counting all the shit he’s done to you obviously still loves you. Go home,” he ordered gently.

 

“You’re crazy,” Blair yanked her hand away glaring at him. “Did you not listen to the story? I lied to him, I told him the baby wasn’t his when it was. I threw it up in his face and gloated about it!”

 

“I listened to it and what I heard was a story of two people that love each other so much that they’re willing to lie, cheat and steal to get what they want. Forgive each other and move on with your lives.”

 

“That’s all well and good but what if he doesn’t want to forgive me and I don’t want to forgive him?”

 

“You will… and if you don’t do it now,” he stated standing abruptly and pulling his coat on. “Trust me… you’ll regret it.”

 

“Who the hell do you think you are? You can’t tell me how I should and shouldn’t live my life,” Blair snarled angrily.

 

“Angers good, it beats that depression funk you’ve been stuck in. Now move on to acceptance and go home. Your family is waiting for you… they’ve been waiting for you,” and with that he stalked away, coat floating around him as he walked, Blair staring angrily at his back.

 

**************************************************************************************

 

Blair fumed all the way back to her hotel. She had looked at a few flats in London but she wanted to make sure Todd hadn’t found out her location before she began looking in earnest. She had decided to give it to the end of the week before she really set her mind to find something.

 

But right now her mind was filled with Tyrene Zedd and the pearls of wisdom he had chosen to impart to her.

 

Who the hell did he think he was? To tell her what she should be doing!

 

She had not told him about the past year so he would give her advice, she had told him so she could try and understand what had happened. Why she had handled things the way she had.

 

Sometime she thought she had figured it all out. Other times she thought that maybe everyone had been right and she had been temporarily insane.

 

Lord knew she couldn’t figure out any other reason why she would try and test Todd’s love for her. Why she would try and get him to accept the child she carried before she told him it was his. He had never been able to accept Brendan why had she ever thought he could accept the new baby she carried?

 

Yep that was it. She had been temporarily insane. And that insanity covered even thinking that she and Todd could make another go of it. They were like oil and water they just didn’t mix. Every time they tried to they ended up hurting themselves and others.

 

Like Starr. Her precious, beautiful Starr. The one and only thing that Todd and she had managed to do correctly.

 

Juggling her bags into her other hand she pulled her key card out of her purse and shoved it into the door lock. When the green light flashed she shoved the door open dropping her bags on the floor as she shrugged out of her coat, letting the door close behind her as she held her coat and purse in one hand.

 

“It’s about damn time,” she heard a familiar voice mutter from inside the room.

 

Stilling for a moment her hand reached out to hit the light switch and she gasped, her heart freezing as she saw Todd lounging back on her bed.

 

“Do you know how long I’ve been waiting?”

 

“Why are you here?” she asked quietly, her voice steady and calm as she tossed her coat and purse on a chair.

 

“Oh I think you know,” he sat up as he smirked at her. “We’ve got a lot of stuff to talk about. So get comfortable Blair… it’s gonna be a long night.”

 

**************************************************************************************

 

Blair stared dumbstruck down at Todd. She closed her eyes and then re-opened them, muttering a fiery curse under her breath as she realized that he was still there.

 

“I’m not going to disappear if you will it hard enough Blair,” Todd grinned in bemusement. He pulled another pillow behind his back and stared back at her. “Make yourself comfortable, kick off your shoes, have a drink, have a seat,” he patted the bed beside him leering at her as she paled.

 

“Why are you here Todd? You could have just called,” Blair muttered kicking her shoes off as she paced in front of the bed, Todd’s eyes following her as she moved. He noted that it must have started raining since he had arrived at the hotel, Blair’s hair was slightly damp, her clothes as well.

 

“I don’t think so babe. If I called and tried to have a serious conversation you could have hung up on me if you didn’t like the subject matter. This way you can’t get rid of me,” he smirked linking his hands together behind his hand he studied her. She’d lost weight in the two weeks since she’d been gone. As if she hadn’t already been skinny enough.

 

“I could always call the front desk and have you thrown out,” she snarled at him, her voice full of false bravado as she continued to pace.

 

“Now why would they throw your husband out of your room when he’s flown all this way to surprise you for Thanksgiving,” Todd said sarcastically. “Now why don’t you sit down you’re looking a little pale.”

 

“You told them you were my husband?” Blair asked in disbelief. “Who the hell do you think you are?!”

 

“I think that I’m the man that you’re crazy about and the one that you’ll be remarrying again as soon as I can find a JP here to do it.”

 

Blair stopped pacing to stare at him a horrified look crossing her face as she realized that he was serious. “Are you fucking nuts? There’s no way that I’m going in front of anyone reciting marriage vows just so you can say no again.”

 

“Now Blair that’s not really fair. You’re the one that said no last time so I think we’re even on the saying no at the altar stuff. As they say third times the charm.”

 

“You really have gone crazy haven’t you? I won’t marry you or attempt to marry you again,” Blair stated stiffly.

 

“You say that now… but I have something, actually two something’s that you want, so pretty soon you’ll be agreeing to whatever I want.”

 

Blair narrowed her eyes as she crossed her arms over her chest. “You mean Starr and this new baby that you’re somehow claiming is ours… That’s pretty low even for you Todd.”

 

“So Starr told you then? Good then I don’t have to say anything,” Todd pushed himself off the bed stretching slightly as he walked over to the dresser. “Why don’t you get your stuff packed so we can get out of here. My rooms much nicer.”

 

“Oh yes Starr told me. She told me that you came home with a baby and claimed it was ours,” Blair turned so she was facing Todd. “So which is it Todd? Is the baby ours? Did you and Paloma lie to me?”

 

“The baby is ours Blair,” Todd said quietly, reaching out a hand he touched her arm gently only to have his hand tossed off.

 

“Don’t touch me,” Blair snarled. “You lost the right to touch me when you told me that my baby died.”

 

“Well I would never have told you that the baby died if you had told me the truth about who the father was,” Todd said angrily.

 

“Why would I do that Todd? You only proved that I couldn’t trust you when you kept taking Starr away from me. First there was that restraining order and than you took off with her. Do you know how much that hurt me? How worried I was that I’d never see her again?”

 

“Well do you know how much it hurt me to hear you keeping tossing the fact that Max was the father of my baby up in my face? You didn’t seem to care much about my feelings then,” Todd dragged a hand through his hair as he drew a ragged breath attempting to reign in his temper. “I’m so glad that Max is the father of this baby and not you,” he said in a high falsetto voice as he glared at her. “Do you have any idea what that did to me? Every time you uttered those words it took everything I had to not smash something. And then to find out that they were untrue, that you were claiming Max as the father to my kid, were you ever planning on telling me?”

 

“I’d tried to tell you the truth Todd, every time I would get ready to do it something would happen. You’d take out a restraining order or leave me on the ground in labor pains, or something equally painful. Did you even think about how devastated I’d be at thinking I’d lost another child?”

 

“Of course I did,” Todd defended himself. “But I figured I could put things right. I brought you home, gave you back Starr even though you convinced her to keep the truth from me. I was going to marry you so we’d be a family again.”

 

“There’s more to a family than just a marriage certificate and children,” Blair said tiredly as she sat down on the edge of the bed. “There’s trust and love, respect.”

 

Todd kneeled in front of her, touching the hands folded on her knees lightly. When she didn’t pull away he held them loosely within his. “I do… love you Blair,” he said awkwardly gripping her fingers tightly trying to get her to meet his eyes. When she didn’t he sighed.

 

“But you don’t trust me? You don’t respect me?” Blair asked quietly.

 

“It’s pretty hard to trust someone who lied to your face just a few short weeks ago. The day we got home from Mexico, remember?” Todd shook his head. “You told me that the baby was Max’s again, you kept up the pretense even after you thought the baby was dead. Why would you do that?”

 

“I didn’t want you to be upset about the baby dying, I was already upset enough for both of us, Starr was upset… I didn’t want you to be upset to.”

 

“You didn’t think I deserved the right to grieve with you guys? If the baby had really been dead… you didn’t think I had the right to mourn my son?”

 

“I didn’t want you to be angry Todd,” Blair finally looked into his eyes.  “I knew that you would be mad as hell that I hadn’t told you so you could be a part of the pregnancy, that you had to deliver the baby even though you thought it wasn’t yours… I… thought I was doing the right thing for a change.”

 

“Well it wasn’t the right thing Blair… If I’d known the baby was mine I would never have…”

 

“You would never have what? How did you find out the baby was alive Todd? Does this have anything to do with David Vickers showing up down in Mexico?”

 

“Blair lets just drop it, okay? It’s all over and done with, the baby’s safe, Starr’s safe… they’re waiting for us,” Todd said dropping Blair’s hands he got to his feet abruptly. “We should go.”

 

“Wait a minute Todd, I want to know… where’s the baby been all this time? Has he been safe, well-cared for? Did David have anything to do with us being told he died?” Blair grabbed at Todd’s hand holding it tightly as she looked up at him.

 

“Blair…” Todd said in exasperation. “It’s over with, do we really need to go into the details?”

 

“It’s not like you had anything to do with it right? I mean David probably saw Paloma take the baby to the hospital and he kidnapped him thinking he could make a quick buck. That’s why he came to the hacienda in Mexico, he thought he could get money for the baby only you thought it wasn’t yours so you wouldn’t give him anything… right?” Blair looked at him with bright eyes. “I don’t blame you Todd, I mean if I had told you the truth you would probably have gone to the hospital with him and we wouldn’t have had anything to worry about. That’s what happened right?”

 

Todd stared down at her with hooded eyes. Blair so desperately didn’t want to see him as being involved in this that she was giving him the perfect out. Could he really let David Vickers take the fall in Blair’s eyes? The chances of David coming within a thousand mile radius of Llanview were slim to none, the chances of Blair finding out the truth even slimmer. “Yeah that’s about the gist of it,” he said softly. Yes he could.

 

“What about David now?”

 

“I don’t think you need to worry about old Davey boy,” Todd said confidently as he reached out to run a hand through Blair’s hair. “Now why don’t you get your stuff packed up and I’ll take you to see Starr and T.C.”

 

“T.C.?” Blair questioned as she stood, she knew Todd was hiding something from her. But from past experience she knew she would only find it out when he was either ready to tell her or she figured it out for herself. Whichever the case may be.

 

“Well I had to name him something.”

 

**************************************************************************************

 

Blair stood apprehensively by Todd’s side as he opened the door. He had one of her bags in his hand, she had another over her shoulder. The rest would be delivered to the room in the morning.

 

This was the biggest mistake she was ever going to make.

 

Letting Todd Manning back into her life. God what had she been thinking to agree to this. She’d had resolve to stay strong and not get sucked back in by him until he had confirmed that the baby was theirs.

 

Her precious baby boy that everyone, including Todd had told her was dead was waiting on the other side of that door. What the hell was taking him so long in getting it open?

 

Todd pushed the door open with an exasperated grunt, he hated those damn key cards. Give him an old-fashioned lock and key and he was a happy man. The damn key cards had to be lined up just right in order to work. For all his love of computers he hated those stupid things.

 

Blair moved past him into the darkened hotel suite, letting her bag fall to the floor by the door. He had reserved a suite on the top floor of the same hotel she had been staying in. Surveying her surroundings she had to admit that his suite was nicer than her room had been.

 

Bigger to. But it would have to be. He had Starr and their baby with him.

 

“Where are they?” she asked. She knew that he would know she was referring to their children.

 

Both their children.

 

Todd shushed her as he flipped on the lights. The jet lag had knocked both Starr and T.C. out soon after arriving. When he had left to go confront their mother they had both been soundly sleeping. The nanny, Suzanne had a small adjoining room to theirs and was probably also asleep.

 

He moved the bag she had dropped by the door to the couch, setting the one he had been holding next to it. Taking her by the hand, squeezing it lightly for reassurance he led her to one of the doors other rooms to the small sitting area.

 

He had certainly spared no expense she grumbled.

 

Pushing the door open he stood to the side as she slowly walked past him. Walking into the room she paused by the bed that Starr was soundly sleeping in. Kneeling by it she brushed her hair back from her face. Stroking her soft cheek lightly with the barest of touches.

 

She didn’t notice Todd waving a sleepy looking Suzanne back to bed. She had heard them enter the children’s room and had come to investigate. She smiled at the sight of Blair by Starr’s bed, closed the door connecting her room to the children’s and went back to bed. They wouldn’t need her until morning. She was smiling as she went to sleep. It was about time, were her last thoughts.

 

Blair leaned over to press a kiss to her daughters’ cheek before standing. She noticed that Todd had entered the room behind her. He had closed the door slightly behind him so as to block out the light still on in the sitting area and was now leaning over a crib whispering softly to its occupant.

 

She hesitated for only a moment by Starr’s bed before slowly walking over to them.

 

The man she loved and their son.

 

Todd watched her surreptitiously from the corner of his eyes as she stood beside him. Together they watched their son, awake, kick at the air. Laughing quietly as Todd held his little hand in his much larger one. She was gnawing on her bottom lip her face a picture of apprehension. He smiled as he reached down, lifting their son into his strong arms. Holding him in front of his face he kissed his forehead before cradling him in his arms. Turning to Blair he raised his eyes to her.

 

She looked down at the baby in wonder. She had only seen him for a few minutes when he had been born. She had been so tired. She had fallen asleep with the truth on her lips and woke to find her baby dead. She was half-afraid that this would be a nightmare and the minute she touched him everything would fall apart.

 

She’d had that nightmare before.

 

She’d had it every night after finding out her baby had died.

 

So she slowly reached out a trembling hand, praying for him to be real. Touching his face lightly, she gasped almost imperceptibly her hands steadying, her face glowing, as he remained solid, looking up at her inquisitively.

 

He was real.

 

“Todd Cramer Manning Jr.,” Todd spoke softly, Starr waking when she heard his voice. Sitting up she rubbed her eyes sleepily, eyes widening in surprise when she saw her mother standing with her father by her brother’s crib. “I’d like you to meet your mother.”

 

“You gave him my family name?” Blair asked in surprise.

 

“Yeah… well,” Todd muttered awkwardly. He looked into her eyes. “I wanted to prove to everyone that he was ours. Not just yours, or mine. But part of both of us.”

 

“Thank you,” Blair said quietly looking back down at their son. She stared at their son in awe, eyes filling with tears. Reaching out he cupped her cheek in one hand, continuing to cradle the baby in his other he finished the introductions. “Blair… our son.”

 

Blair smiled tearfully, holding her sons’ hand within hers she hesitated. “Can I hold him Todd?” she asked quietly. “I want to hold my son.”

 

Todd nodded and transferred their son from his arms to hers, standing as close to them as he could without scaring her off. She held T.C. tightly, pressing little kisses to his face as he wiggled in her grasp. He kept his hand lightly on his son’s stomach.

 

“He’s allergic to lemurs,” Todd said suddenly as he watched mother and son bond. He winced as he heard the words exit his mouth. Why the hell did I say that? Who cares if he’s allergic to lemurs?

 

Blair looked at him quizzically before turning her attention back to their son. “Then daddy’s just going to have to wait until we’re all grown up to get his lemur,” she cooed to the baby. She smiled as she heard Todd chuckle softly in response.

 

“Do you like him mommy?” Starr asked from where she was standing between them now, peering up at the bundle in her mothers’ arms. “He’s not big enough to do much yet but daddy said he’ll grow fast.”

 

“Yes he will,” Blair murmured. She kneeled slowly, allowing Starr to lean against her, resting her arm over her shoulder they both looked at the baby. “Thank you for bringing him home Todd.”

 

Todd squirmed against the praise. If she knew what he’d really done… giving their son away thinking he was Max’s, then having to backtrack in order to get him back she wouldn’t be thanking him.

 

She would be kicking him out on his ass. Probably getting her own restraining order to keep him away from her and their kids.

 

Nope Blair couldn’t know what he’d done. He wanted his family back in full. And he wanted his family back in time for Christmas. This was one holiday season where no one was spending time in jail or away. They would be together.

 

Maybe they’d even stay in England for the holidays.

 

Blair seemed to like it here. He had not forgotten that this had been where they were supposed to meet way back when. When he had left her after their second wedding to go retrieve Marty for Paloma; they had planned to reunite in England. They would honeymoon there before returning to their lives in Llanview. But that had never happened…

 

He had taken a bullet meant for Patrick Thornhart, Blair was told he was dead and when he had come back from the dead he had found his wife having sex with the man whose life he had saved. Then she had gotten pregnant by the creep and everything totally went to hell. They had spent the next couple of years kicking each other everywhere they could think of. They used every tool at their disposal to destroy their relationship. Each other. Starr. Tea.

 

But they were together again, at long last and he meant for them to stay that way. Come hell or high water they would have a happy Manning Christmas together.

 

Even if he had to tie everyone up under the tree and force them too.