~
This was really becoming a recurring theme. Shawn, finding himself alone, in a locker room that would otherwise be buzzing with people. It upset him, secretly, to realise that so many of the boys chose to leave the moment he showed his face. He didn�t want to feel different, or like he was above them. Too many years of that had changed him, he�d changed. Dully he watched as Randy Orton entered the room, nodding in greeting before grabbing his bag and leaving again. Even he didn�t intend to stay. Was Shawn that difficult to hang with? Surely his personality had changed to the point where he shouldn�t be threatening to anyone? Well, anyone except John Cena.
Shawn scowled, pushing back the annoyance at his younger colleague. Instead he showered quickly, hoping to find Hunter as soon as he was ready to be out in public again. It would mean having to rid himself of all the blood and sweat � at least he�d made Cena bleed as well � and pretend he wasn�t feeling the aftermath of a pretty tiring match, though.
Eventually he found himself in the hallway, trying to peer through and over the masses � or dozens of people at least � and find the familiar form of his best friend. It had been too long since they�d really talked, and he knew Hunter was here. Injured or not, his friend wasn�t going to miss Wrestlemania. In fact, Shawn had enjoyed talking to him after the Hall of Fame ceremony, however briefly. He longed to talk to someone that understood him, instead of some brash kid that refused to sell Shawn�s moves. John Cena was a good guy, but right now Shawn was ready to hit him over the head with Hunter�s sledgehammer.
�He�s in the lobby with Steph and the baby.�
Ah, another person he�d expected to see. Not that anyone had informed him that Chris Jericho would be there, but he�d had a hunch that the self-proclaimed rock star wouldn�t be able to stay away from the feast that was Wrestlemania. No real wrestlers could; retired or not. They�d always care about the biggest night of the year.
�And who says I was looking for Hunter? I could have been looking for you.�
Chris just smiled, and Shawn brushed a hand through his still wet hair, taking in the dishevelled appearance of his current companion. Not very Wrestlemania-like, and a right insult to the memory of the ghastly pants and sparkly outfits Chris had so often worn. Nothing at all like the character of Chris Jericho. He looked more like he�d been playing in the park with his son and randomly decided to show up at the most star-studded event of the year.
�You weren�t looking for me, Shawn. We all know that the only person you stand on your toes for is Hunter. Besides, with me you�d only have to listen to the awed gasps of my many fans. I�m easy to locate.�
There was a twinkle in Chris� eye that Shawn envied. Being able to joke around like that, it was something he so rarely did these days. Without Hunter around he�d gotten homesick, and even Ric � bless his heart � couldn�t make him feel better. Ric�s idea of a good time conflicted with his, and no matter how hard the older man tried, he wasn�t Hunter.
The man standing next to him wasn�t either, but the carefree air of someone no longer under the thumb of Vince � or wrestling in general � remained refreshing, and Shawn had to admit that there had been slight hope on his part that Chris would be there, if only to hear the man talk nonsense. He didn�t need deep conversations with the guy, just a way to escape the serious nature of wrestling and talk with someone who didn�t want to get �the rub� by being a friend of his. Besides, he�d found out he enjoyed spending time with Chris.
�You�re easy to locate because you smell, Chris. What did you do before you came here, roll around in the mud?�
A laugh, one that caused Shawn to smile. It was an infectious sound, and he soon found himself grinning. It hadn�t been that funny, but if Chris enjoyed it, then who was he to deny him?
�You always were a charmer. No, I didn�t roll around in the mud, though it�s a tempting thought. I wasn�t doing anything important, to be honest. Just cleaning out the closet, throwing away things I no longer need.� He shrugged. �Something suddenly made me decide to accept Vince�s invitation. I didn�t want to change my mind, so I just left.�
That sounded like Chris, alright, just slightly too impulsive for his own good. It seemed a bit irresponsible as well, but Shawn wouldn�t be the one to bring that up. There was a certain charm to just packing up your things and leaving, one he could definitely understand. Chris was lucky to have the freedom.
�What prompted you to come? I doubt it was the memory of the last time we met at Wrestlemania, wonderful as the thought of losing to me would be.�
Another chuckle, a light one this time, one Shawn felt. He�d never realised how easily this man laughed, and how it made others want to smile as well. He had to admit, not having been given the chance to really get to know this man had proved to be a definite loss. Shawn was pretty sure he could get used to him being around.
�Oh, trust me, I enjoyed that Wrestlemania. The gasp of anger and surprise after I low-blowed you stays with me to this day. That wasn�t what reminded me, though.�
�Then what was it?� Shawn asked quietly, watching Chris� lips turn upwards at the thought of that Wrestlemania match. They�d torn the house down that year, and their match had been acknowledged by many to be the best one there. They meshed well together.
For a moment he thought Chris would answer the question, but the blond man shook his head and looked up � only barely � at Shawn with a wicked smile.
�Now that, Shawn, would be telling.�
Shawn raised an eyebrow, catching the way Chris was skirting around the subject. Perhaps it was something personal, or he wanted to make it another game of theirs. That was fine, Shawn didn�t expect Chris to bare his soul, not to him and not while standing in a rather busy hallway. Casually he moved away from the door, allowing some of the other wrestlers to dart in and finally take a well-earned shower. Something they should have done the moment their match had finished, Shawn figured, but the buzz of Wrestlemania coursed through everyone. He couldn�t blame them for riding the wave of wrestling success and forgetting about mundane things such as showering.
�Let�s go somewhere else, I need to sit down,� he muttered, mentally tracing a map of the place and trying to remember where everything was. He just caught the look of concern, and it made him scowl. Chris worried too much about him. He was Shawn Michaels, he�d cope. Shaking his head, he led Chris to the spot he knew had been set aside for wrestlers to eat at.
�You know, you can go to the lobby if you want. I�ll find my way,� Chris offered, but Shawn shook his head again. He�d find Hunter later. His friend was so tied to wrestling that he�d be easy enough to find, and Shawn knew Hunter would prefer spending this time with his family, though he�d never admit it.
Ignoring the stench of unhealthy-looking healthy food � and they were supposed to eat that? �Shawn motioned for Chris to sit down. The other man shrugged, and then did so. The place was currently occupied by a few wrestlers, most Shawn didn�t know well, but beside the murmurings of Sandman talking to Dreamer in a corner, all was quiet. They�d be able to talk pretty openly, what with Dreamer almost asleep and Sandman too out of it to notice.
�Shouldn�t you be with your friends?�
There was no way that Chris was here and dealing with Shawn while he could be busy catching up with Benoit, Copeland, and the other Canadians. With a wry grin Shawn wondered why the most frustrating people he knew were always Canadians. Chris was definitely frustrating, because Shawn just couldn�t figure out what the man was thinking.
�I said hi. They were done pretty early, so it worked out. I saw your match on the monitor and decided you needed cheering up.�
�Was it that obvious that I was annoyed?�
�To me it was.�
Not really the answer he�d been looking for, but it would do. At least it didn�t sound like everyone had caught on, or at least not their youngest fans. Cena was the biggest babyface around, after all, boos or not, and he didn�t need Shawn bringing him down like that. That was the job of all those know-it-all smarks Hunter ranted to him about.
Funny how little they spoke when meeting, Shawn realised as he watched Chris survey the room, eyes appearing to drink in every wrestling related quirk. The water bottles thrown in one corner, the semi-finished sandwiches and salads, abandoned in haste, and the towel dangling precariously from a chair. There was something about the way Chris looked at it that fascinated him. It wasn�t longing, it wasn�t distaste, but it was a strange mix of the two. Like he was worried, yet satisfied with it all at the same time. Quite like Shawn felt sometimes.
�Do you miss it?�
It hit Shawn that this was the first serious question he�d asked the man. At least when looking at it from a wrestling point of view. He was curious, wanted to know how Chris saw wrestling now. Did he look at it with annoyance, or did he miss it? How did he look at the business that had controlled him for so long? Hell, Shawn even wondered what Chris saw when he looked at him. An old, broken, tired man, or the Heartbreak Kid Shawn Michaels everyone looked up to?
�I miss some parts of it,� came the soft reply. �I miss the excitement, the feeling of living my childhood dream, and I miss my friends.�
�What don�t you miss?�
Chris smiled, hands fumbling with the buttons on his shirt. More out of habit than anything else, almost like he was nervous about the direction this conversation was taking.
�The politics, the drama, everyone pretending to be someone else. I hate having to figure out if I�m talking to the man, or to the person that man would like to be.�
Blue eyes met. Something about the way Chris was talking to him hit home, caused Shawn to wonder if he was the one Chris was talking about. But then, somewhere in the relaxed tone Chris was talking in, he also recognized admission. Perhaps Chris himself had been guilty of that too, finding it easier to live a lie than to be true to who he was. Most guys, if not all, had found that out the hard way.
�I think we all have that, deep down.�
�Even those that have earned the right to do as they damn well please?�
Shawn nodded, realizing Chris already knew the answer to that question. Somehow their conversation, which had been joking and humorous mere minutes before, had turned serious. It was both annoying and liberating, this turn of events. On the one hand Shawn felt too exhausted to really think about this, but on the other hand having more than just a passing talk with Chris was pleasant. It made things more than just a game.
It suddenly hit Shawn that that had changed. He�d been so very pleased with the shallowness of their conversations � though somehow he felt there was a deeper meaning hidden somewhere � yet now he was more than curious to find out how Chris� mind worked.
�Yes, even those.�
Shawn paused, memories getting to him. Of a young boy, watching wrestling, enthralled by what he saw. Of his first show, the rush of adrenaline, and that very first win. Oh how he wished he could have remained like that. He wouldn�t change anything, but at the same time he wished he could.
�I�m sorry, I�m not exactly giving you much incentive to come back, now am I?� Shawn muttered, forcing himself to smile. Chris was quiet again, just watching him, and Shawn could almost hear the wheels turning.
�You are, actually, you just don�t realise it.�
Before Shawn had time to contemplate yet another confusing statement, his attention was drawn towards the other side of the room. Chris realised it as well, turning his head to find out what Shawn was looking at. The annoyed sigh would have been comical, only Shawn wasn�t amused. He wasn�t done talking yet, either. Curiosity plaged him.
�Hunter! Hope you�re feeling better?�
Shawn watched as the two exchanged pleasantries, the curiosity on Hunter�s face clear. He moved, allowing his friend to sit down next to him, and brushed a hand through his hair. More and more, he got the feeling that he should be feeling uncomfortable with this � and he was � only he didn�t know why.
�I�m fine. I just need some rehabilitating, that�s all. Nothing for you to worry about.�
Defensive, unnecessarily so, and Shawn eyed his friend wearily. Why the two had always clashed, he really didn�t know, and it didn�t help any. Especially when Chris got up, leaving Shawn unable to come up with a reason why he shouldn�t.
�Well, I should be off. I didn�t really tell Jess where I was going, though I think she must have guessed. I expect her to be pretty angry with me.�
Chris paused, giving a wry smile.
�Hunter, say hi to Steph for me. Please tell her I miss the creative process of insulting her, as always. And Shawn, I think I�ll remind you some other time.�
A wink, then he was gone, and Shawn still wished he could come up with a reason to stop him. That last answer hadn�t made sense, and he wanted � no, needed � to continue asking about it. But, with Hunter looking at him curiously, and the aches and pains flaring, he simply didn�t have the time.
Next time, perhaps.