Third Round TKO for Sluggers in Forest Park Tournament

Just like the TV shows: Dallas, The Love Boat, Fantasy Island and The Jeffersons -- all good things must come to an end. For the Lagersluggers, their first two opponents at Forest Park were little better than sparring partners against the marquee champion. On Wednesday, August 30th however the Sluggers ran up against some worthy competition in the form of the umpire...and the Sellouts.

Early on it was evident that the Sluggers would need to kick it into that higher gear to overcome the bats and speed of the Sellouts and the bad eyesight of the man behind the plate (the umpire, not Cartman). In the first inning, the Sellouts struck for 5 runs then were held scoreless in the second. The Sluggers countered with three in the first and two in the second for a 5-5 tie ballgame. In the third, shades of what was to come in later innings emerged. Team Sellouts did some good hitting and some good hustle and the umpire aided their rally with a couple of questionable calls. In the bottom of the third for the Sluggers, Wamp got nailed on some aggressive base running on his RBI hit. The inning short circuited further when with one out and Commish on first base, Freak lined out to the second baseman and Commish scampered back to the bag on a throw behind him. To everyone on the field and in the bench area Commish appeared to be safe. But the fuzzy, bespectacled umpire overzealously punched Commish out to notch another controversial call against the Good Guys. The next inning got the Freak on edge and that spelled trouble. In the midst of more bang-bang plays (none of which went in favor of the Sluggers), a Sellout got  a hit to left field, the throw came to second (where Freak was pushing Bo that inning) and their runner was trying to take an extra base. The ball was caught by the Freak who whipped his glove-hand down to the bag in time to have the runner step onto the glove (with the ball) and of course the umpire stood there like he was riding an imaginary hang-glider. Now hide the children as I repeat the nasty tirade that shall forever get players of all levels of play ejected from their games: "What? Are you kidding me?" I know this is a segment the family enjoys and I apologize for such language - if you can even read the above as it is so vicious and obscene that your browser window may have taken it upon itself to omit it. Needless to say, that magical phrase earned me a seat on the bench for the remainder of the contest. Yes, I'm not kidding and yes that was all I said. No cursing, no personal attacks at his family just "What? Are you kidding me?"

So after six more tallies were added to their score, the Sluggers came to bat and were retired after plating a run. The top of the fifth was less eventful and the Sellouts pushed across another run. Trailing 18-6 the Sluggers needed three runs to continue playing, but were only able to work one runner around to score. Sluggers finish the City Tournament 2-1 ending in the quarter finals. Solid play by: Gus, D-Myz, Sterling, Wamp, Big Dawg, Bo, JoJo, Borgie!, Cartman, Commish and Freddie. Danny did a nice cart wheel on a home run over the fence that the umpire called a ground rule double. Sterling also made a nice toss from left center to nail a runner at home in the early going. Commish got battered a bit by some middle hitting m-f'ers.

Epilogue: I guess I shouldn't turn this game into something about me, but while I'm here at the keyboard I'll have you chew on this if you'll read it. The two worst calls of the night (blatant baby!) were when Joe was doubled up at first and when the runner was tagged out-safe at second. In the post game hand slaps, their players even admitted the calls were so very wrong. Somehow lost in all of this is Cartman. This man talks the most sh*t of anyone and never gets tossed and somehow the Freak now jumps up on the Sluggers all-time ejection list behind Commish. I'm calling Johnny Cock-Ring right now...

Rainouts only slow the inevitable - Sluggers Take Round 2

Tuesday August 29th, 6:30PM at Forest Park was the setting for round two of the city playoffs. The Sluggers had anticipated a much tougher foe in the form of the old Roadrunners but instead got a team that struggled to place the ball on offense. With a light wind and almost chilly temperatures mixed with an occassional drizzle - this contest figured to be low scoring. The Sluggers used a little small ball to score single runs in the 1st, 3rd & 4th innings - and probably could have plated another run or two in the fourth but normally all out hustle Bo dropped his head on a popup behind third base that dropped and he was gunned out at first to end the inning. Meanwhile Commish rolled through 4 scoreless innings before running into trouble in the fifth. Facing Team Do You Know Who We Are? - DYKWWA to some, Commish aided their cause with an Izzy-like wild streak that saw him walk three batters in the frame. Bearing down with two runs allowed after a base knock to left field and nice defense by Sterling to hustle the ball in to hold the runner at third base with one out - the bases were loaded and the Sluggers were still up 3-2. Commish induced a routine grounder up the middle that JoJo calmly fielded just behind second base - stepped on the bag and flung his throw to first to complete the inning-ending double play. Cartman immediately fired up the squad on the bench and the offense quickly replaced the two runs given to DYKWWA. Up 5-2 in the top of the sixth, DYKWWA had a mini threat with two on two out. The hitter slapped a ball off the end of Commish's glove that trickled to the second base bag, where the Freak scooped and stepped on to record the final out. As has reared its head in recent weeks, the KILLER INSTINCT appeared for a cameo in the bottom of the sixth as the Sluggers batted around to plate seven runs - the seventh run coming on the foot of D-Myz. Sluggers are short game winners 12-2.

With Font and Walter on the bench in lieu of most of the lady Sluggers (save for Mampler), the Lagersluggers once again fought off the spirits of Forest Park. The Hyundai long drives of the night would go to Freddie and Sterling - each attacked the mush-mush-mush ball and were able to over-shoot DYKWWA's outfielders. Gus smacked the wet sock well when he wasn't swinging wood. Bo and Freak took o-fers but made up for it in the field. Cartman landed some good swings as did JoJo and Wampler. Not to be left out in all of this was the return of babyface Borgie - sans beard and moustache that he kindly donated to a little spanish senorita south of the border.

Next up: Wednesday Night Action: Forest Park 8:30 PM start vs. The Sellouts - with the winner playing next Tuesday at 7:30 PM.

Dinky Sluggers Survive Dreaded Forest Park

The ghosts of last fall greeted the Sluggers upon their return to Forest Park to claim their berth into the City Championship tournament. Eleven Sluggers assembled (a number of true power I've heard) to do battle with the Wilmore Wednesday Champion - BOFA!! (Bank of America if you're nasty) Around the defense for this single game elimination first round match up for the good guys: Wamp-RF, Gus-RCF, Sterling-LCF, D-Myz-LF, Freddie-3B, JoJo-SS, Bo-2B, Big Dawg-1B, Cartman-C, Commish-P and Freak-INFPU. This game would separate the players from the "what-if guys". ASA only bats lined the fence around the dugout and the balls were softer than a three week old cornbread muffin lying in a pool of spilt Natty Light.

The signs began in our favor as we won the right to command the hammer (be home team). More good things broke our way as we won the first inning with some nice two out hitting. Font manned the bench, keeping the Lady Sluggers throng company and there was an awesome turnout of the throng I will add. With the lift in fan support, the Sluggers nearly were able to mercy the BOFA team but not quite. Up 16-7 going to the top of the seventh, a victory seemed secure. But as we've learned from last fall, never count that victory until the final out is caught. After a rocky start to the last inning, the Monday Wilmore Champion Lagersluggers persevered to nail down a date for a Sunday 6:30 contest in round two of the tournament.  Final score: Lagersluggers 16 BOFA 12. I'm not going to pat anyone on the back or call anyone out specifically because the effort was all team - hitting and fielding.

I'd like to take this opportunity to dedicate this opening win to the Sluggers of last fall and say, "Man I still hate these fields." Next up in City Tournament Action is the winner of Windys/Imos vs other team I cannot remember at 6:30PM in Forest Park - Diamond #1.