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| REVEALED: Do you feel that your familiarity with the genre of random is inherent, or something which has been developed over the centuries as the world has become an increasingly random place? It's probably a bit of both - somehow inherited bits off my dad ("There is something strange about my gloved left hand") and well, the world is a bit stupid, I mean who sells toastie machines that bark?? Which of the following has enriched your life the most, and why? (Lionel Ritchie, Rolf Harris, Captain Beefheart) Oh my god what a question! I proudly own a Beefheart cd so nuff sed, the dust blows forward n the dust blows back...but Rolf Harris covering Bohemian Rhapsody, what a guy (apart from everytime he speaks he sounds like asthma), and Mr Ritchie, well you said "helllooo" and I said Bye mate, go and get another song worth writing home about before you release a greatest hits. How has going to the Courts changed your life, if at all? Well I now know that flying fish really exist. Is it true that you created your own rival Courts? Yeh Hesslewell Courts, it's these flats that are in Heswall, and for a laugh some people wanted to sit off there until we got kicked off by 87 year old vegetables. Rumour has it that the staff at your workplace very generously decided to rename you. What is the nickname, and what was it triggered by? "SHIVERY DICK", wow yes. It was that woman who decided that everytime she saw me I was shivering - it's the middle of winter and I have just been walkin through Heswall, do you expect me to walk in with a sun tan and a stick of rock? Is it possible to continue this when I am remotely alive? *McS&F reluctantly brings interview to a brief pause at this point* For you, what were the greatest highlights of the hedgejumping season? Of course, a certain person asking how long he was "out cold" for when he wasn't at all, and being bombarded with random greebos - and were you even there when the pile ons happened? They might have happened after you went, I canny remember. Shame Jimmy Nail didnt turn up. What has been your proudest moment to date? Well my dear godfather I have no fucking clue. I don't particularly view any of the stuff I do very highly, but apparently other people do, so you should really think of one yourself or ask a fan (if I have any). In September, a scantily-clad young scall kid reputedly leapt into your lap, demanding a BMW. What thoughts were going through your mind during this incident? I simply had to somehow get my hands on a BMW from somewhere before young Mr "I can't be arsed getting dressed properly in the morning" would lay down the scall law. 'Just cos I'm ten and three foot short doesn't mean I cant kick yer ed in!' Good to hear he got a book published though and that it is being sold in HMV. Do you think that the Santa outfit you were wearing at the time may have provoked the incident? Or was it simply a case of your magnetic personality? I am the Venus Scall Trap of the Northern Hemisphere after all, but I think we should hurl the blame on the man from Lapland. His sleigh wont work without Christmas spirit! What are your personal views on Theseus and the minotaur? What a beast! and the Minotaur wasn't too friendly either! Finally, how would you feel if someone bought you an impromptu gift consisting of elastic bands and a book about banana muffins? Deeply honoured. Even firing the bands of the corner of the book would come to mind of course, I never get tired of that book especially with the eyes! Rock on Greg Rusedski!! |
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| gallery (new) |
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| Ste jumped at the opportunity to be photographed alongside his idol |
| Universally acclaimed superstar pops in for a pint of cactus juice |
| MEET RANDOM STE |