Author: Lady Starblade -- [email protected]
Rating: PG
Pairing: T/R, T/M (kinda)
Category: Humor & splashes of other stuff
Spoilers: Nope
Warnings: Written in 2 hours and unbeated
Archive: Entslash; Anyone else, if ya want it, take it. Just let me know where.
Feedback: <in best Roger Rabbit voice> Pppppleeeease!
Disclaimer: Hahaha.....I don't own 'em, Paramount does. And someone's making a lot of money off of Enterprise, but not me, and not with this fic.
Author's Note: This is a combination of a pair of challenges; Nijijin's "Cold Medicine" Challenge, and one I made a while back, required elements: Travis giggling, 2 bottles of non-alcoholic green liquid, Porthos appearance, reference to a bunny, and the phrase "Trip on, baby!" I know from personal experience that medication can cause this kind of reaction.
Summary: One of Phlox's concoctions has an odd effect on Trip.
**
Trip Tucker made a sound like an elephant trumpeting. Clapping a hand over his mouth and nose as he sneezed, he wound up with a handful of glop. "Ugh." He made a face at the mess in his palm and groped for another tissue to wipe it off. Porthos lifted his head off of his front paws to look up at him. The beagle had been spending some days in Sickbay as an alternative to keeping him cooped up in the captain's quarters all day, every day. Dr. Phlox claimed to enjoy having the dog around for company. Apparently Porthos hadn't decided Phlox's pets were toys yet. The head dropped back to the paws and the dog back to his nap.
Trip had been sniffling for the better part of two days, but the sneezing had started this morning, and he had finally wound up in Sickbay. *Yeah,* Trip thought to himself, *more like Malcolm threatened to stun you and haul you down ta Sickbay himself.* He knew a large part of his lover's insistence was born of concern, but he also knew that Malcolm didn't want to catch whatever he had. It had taken the armory officer a full month to get over the last cold he'd had. Maybe it was the thought of a sick, cranky Malcolm that had driven Trip into Phlox's care.
Almost as if the thought had summoned him, the Denobulean doctor reappeared around a corner. "That was a rather impressive sneeze, Commander."
"Glad ya liked it." Trip's voice sounded congested to his own ears. "What are we gonna do about it?" He almost regretted asking when Phlox held up two small bottles of a bright liquid. "Oh no, what are those made out of, distilled dishwater with a bit of bat intestine?"
Phlox, long since accustomed to disparaging remarks about his remedies, merely grinned. "It is a medication developed by my mother, who is a genius in her own right. This mixture is a proven success."
"Mama Phlox's home recipe, huh?" Trip sneezed violently and immediately groaned as he grabbed his nose. "Anything's better than this. I'll give it a shot."
Phlox nodded. "Ensign Cutler found it worked quite well for her when she had the cold." At Trip's questioning look, he continued, "She caught it from Lieutenant Reed."
"Why didn't Malcolm take your magic potion?"
"He said something about not drinking anything that looked like it came out of a 'bilge bay.'"
"That's Malcolm for ya."
"Indeed." Phlox pulled the cap off of one bottle and filled it to the brim with the liquid. "You see, the cap itself a measuring device. My mother was not fond of hyposprays, so she made this to be taken orally." He held out the cap to Trip. "One cap every two hours until the bottles are empty. That should do the trick."
Trip accepted it warily and eyed the concoction for a moment. *The things I do for Malcolm,* he thought as he tossed it back. It didn't taste too bad, a bit like asparagus dipped in honey. Not that he knew what that combination truly tasted like. Phlox took the cap back and replaced it on the bottle.
"That dose should take effect in the next ten minutes or so. You can remain in Sickbay or return for your quarters to get some rest. I gather you prefer the second option?" Trip shot him a look, and Phlox nodded again. "Very well, I'll inform the captain."
Trip bobbed his head and slid off of the biobed. "Thanks, Doc." He picked up the two bottles and turned to go. Just as he reached the doors, he turned with a final question. "One more thing. Are there any, you know, side effects?"
Phlox pursed his lips and tilted his head. "Well, Ensign Cutler reported she felt quite euphoric during the treatment."
Trip's eyebrows went up. "Really?" He looked down at the bottles in his hand. "Huh."
**
Travis Mayweather exited the turbolift, studying the datapadd he carried. He had been meaning to talk to Trip about a slight lag he had been feeling at the jump to warp speed. It wasn't anything serious, but it bothered Travis's perfectionist streak that it was a bit off. He rounded a corner as he scrolled the small screen down.
A high-pitched giggle reached his ears. Travis stopped dead in his tracks and his head jerked up at the maniacal sound. Thoughts of invasion by telepathic aliens or plain old insanity raced across his mind as he looked around. He didn't see anything, but the giggling continued, interrupted by an occasional snort. Travis relaxed slightly as he pinpointed the nature of the noise. It sounded like someone had gotten tipsy. He shook his head as he came around the final corner. But he didn't expect what he saw.
Trip was leaning against the corridor bulkhead, clutching at two bottles of some green fluid and giggling hysterically. His shoulders were shaking and his eyes were screwed shut as he laughed.
Travis edged forward cautiously, reaching out a hand. "Uh, Commander Tucker? Trip? Are you okay?"
Trip's eyes flew open, and he grinned widely at Travis. "Hey Travis, howzit going?" He started laughing again.
Travis stared at the other man for a moment, then lunged for the nearest comm unit, situated several feet further down the hall. "Mayweather to Sickbay."
Phlox's voice immediately came back through the unit. "Phlox here."
"Uh, Doctor, I just found Commander Tucker in the hallway on B-Deck, and he's....well, he's giggling."
The voice became thoughtful. "Ah, that dose took effect quicker than I expected. It's nothing to worry about, Ensign, he's under the influence of a cold medication. He's supposed to take one capful every 2 hours. Could you see him to his quarters?"
Travis let out a breath of relief and felt himself smile. The chief engineer was not going insane. "I will, Doctor, thanks."
"My pleasure."
Closing down the channel, Travis turned back to see Trip staring at him with wide blue eyes. "Phlox gave me these, you know. I didn't steal 'em." He held up the two bottles and shook them, sloshing the green stuff inside.
"I know you didn't, but you need to go to your quarters and get some sleep, remember?"
Trip's forehead wrinkled in concentration. "Yeah, Phloxie said somethin' about that." He lifted his gaze back up to Travis's. "But I wanted ta go see Malcolm in the Armory."
Travis bit the inside of his cheek. *Where is a vid recorder when you need one?* "You can't go now, Trip, maybe later," he said aloud, taking hold of the nearest arm. "But you need to go to your quarters right now."
Letting out a gutsy sigh, Trip allowed himself to be guided down the corridor. "Okay, Travis, I go."
Travis resisted the urge to pat the man on the head. "That's a good boy."
Trip shuffled along beside him, humming nonsensically, "I'm trip, trip, tripping on baby, tripping on along, tripping baby...."
**
An hour and a half later, Travis poured a green capful down Trip's throat, watching him make a funny face as he licked his lips. "That doesn't taste as bad as some of the doc's stuff. Wouldn't tell me what was in it."
"You probably wouldn't want to know."
Trip nodded sagely. Travis pondered the other man momentarily. He just didn't feel right leaving Trip to fend for himself. Trip had been alternating between giggling hysterically and grandly pontificating. It was entertaining to watch, Travis had to admit.
"Ya know you're pretty cute, right?"
Travis's train of thought was derailed by the comment. Blinking owlishly, he stared at Trip. "What?"
Trip looked back incredulously. "Well, ya are! Not as cute as Mal, of course, but you're cute anyway."
Travis's mouth worked silently as he tried to think of something to say. Only a handful of people aboard ship knew of Trip and Malcolm's relationship, and he had never heard either man make such a bold comment. He finally fell back on the old standby, "Thank you."
Trip bowed at the waist, almost falling off the bed in the process. "You're very welcome." He pronounced each word carefully, ending with a lazy grin. It held for a few seconds, then slowly faded into a serious expression. "I love Malcolm a lot. I don't tell him that enough." His eyebrows drew down ominously. "His parents don't love him, but I do."
"I'm sure he knows that, Trip."
"Yeah, but I need to tell him more."
"Then tell him next time you see him."
Trip's face broke into a sunny smile. "I sure will! You're pretty smart, Travis. And cute too!" Travis began to gnaw at his lower lip, trying to contain himself. Trip was even more of a character than usual while medicated.
But his control went by the wayside as Trip stuck two fingers of one hand up and commenced to bounce them up and down, singing in an off-key voice, "Little Fufu Bunny was hoppin' through the forest, scoopin' up the field mice and boppin' 'em on the head!"
Travis began to giggle despite himself. Trip looked so comical, gesturing along with the lyrics. He sat down on the bed and copied Trip's hand movements, still giggling. Trip started laughing as well, and the two men wound up leaning against each other, cackling and bouncing their fingers up and down.
It was at this moment that Malcolm Reed chose to enter the room. The look of sheer surprise on the man's face sent Travis into whooping laughter. Trip looked up and grinned. "Malcolm! I love you!"
Malcolm must've exerted that famed Reed control to keep from bolting. Instead, he turned his gray eyes to Travis and said, "The Captain said Trip wasn't feeling well." Travis pulled himself together enough to fill Malcolm in. "Phlox gave him some medication from his cold and it's made him a little...silly."
"I can see that." The corners of his mouth began to curve upward as Trip continued to smile up at him. "Hello, Trip."
"I love you, Malcolm!" Trip crooned again, causing Travis to smother another round of giggles.
The other man stepped forward, grabbed Trip's head in his hands, and planted a kiss on the engineer's forehead. "I love you too, Trip. Now shouldn't you be asleep?"
Trip's expression twisted into something resembling a pout. "Travis and I were singin' 'bout Fufu Bunny."
One of Malcolm's eyebrows twitched upward, but otherwise kept a neutral expression. "Yes, I know," he continued in a calm voice, "but Travis has to go now, and you need to go to bed."
Travis stood up and patted Trip on the shoulder. "I'll see you later, okay?"
"Okay."
Travis pointed the two bottles out to Malcolm. "He's supposed to take one capful every two hours until it's gone. He had one dose about 10 minutes ago."
Malcolm nodded. "Thank you for looking after him, Travis."
"I was glad to. Your turn now."
Malcolm bowed his head in acknowledgment. "I'm afraid I don't know the words to 'Fufu Bunny'."
Travis couldn't help but say, "Oh, Trip will be happy to teach you." At Trip's vigorous nod, Travis made his way to the door. He stopped to throw a last comment over his shoulder. "Hey Trip?"
"Yeah?"
"Trip on, baby!"
Trip's giggles followed Travis down the hall.
END