Characters: Myself and my Logan/Wolverine clone
Author: Lady Starblade � [email protected]
Disclaimer: Don�t own the character Logan or any other mentioned character. I belong to me. No money made. Capsice?
Rating: PG-13
Warning: Um�.this is what I call an NDP. That stands for �No Discernable Plot.� But it�s fun anyway.
Feedback: Yes, please. <Bambi eyes>
Author�s Note: Just sprung to mind while taking my younger sister shopping. And I honestly didn�t intend for it to be this long, but it kinda acquired a life of its own. This was written for a roleplaying list, so some references may fly over your head. Sorry 'bout that, but it's a fun read anyway. Or at least I'd like to think so. <g>
Summary: I go shopping for the May Day party.
**
10:14 am
Clad in my big comfy bathrobe, I scratched the back of my head as I looked into my closet�at least the half that had clothes in it. The other half was filled with boxes of papers, books, and all the stuff a pack rat like me collects. And what I saw didn�t make me happy.
The May Day party at the Brigham Manor was less than a week away, and I was trying to decide what to take with me. I already had most of what I needed�the fixings for my favorite party drinks, comfy clothes and shoes if I decided to go hiking around Tammy�s�.but I felt the need for a �wow� factor outfit. And I just didn�t have it. The closest thing I had was my long black skirt with the thigh-high slit. Not quite what I was looking for.
I sighed and put my hands on my hips. There was only one thing to do. And I wasn�t going to do it alone.
**
10:22 am
I�ve been told I have a way with words, and I was going to need all of that ability to convince the man in front of me to go along with my plan. We were alone in the connecting hallway by the stairs so I could keep this as quiet as possible. I looked at Logan, the closest thing I had to a First in this house, and smiled what I hoped was my most innocent smile. But he knew me far too well.
�Uh oh. I know that look. What are ya up to?� He eyed me warily, as if I was going to spring a trap on him. So much for the element of surprise. I decided on the direct approach. At least he would appreciate that.
�I need you to come shopping with me.�
�What, we out of Cool Whip again?� he smirked.
�No. Clothes shopping. I need a new outfit.�
You would have thought I had smacked him with a 2x4. Not that I blamed him. I hated clothes shopping. I was the girl who�d wear shoes until there were holes in the soles, jeans until the seams ripped out, and shirts until they were so tattered you could barely use them as shoeshine rags. I just hated it.
But there was one exception. I liked special occasion shopping. If I had an event to go to, I was all about hitting the stores for a new look. This time around, I really wanted to make a good impression. And besides, I had worked hard through the winter to get my nice new curves, and I felt like showing them off.
Logan finally regained his voice. �Why me?�
I almost laughed at his tone. There was a long train of logic that had led me to ask Logan, and I tried to explain it. Finally I just waved my hands and said, �Look, the only suitable candidates here are you, Malcolm, and Legolas. Malcolm�s got a visitor��namely, a doppelganger from another household��and if I take Legolas out in public, it�d trigger a riot!�
He conceded my point. �Well, yeah��
I cut him off by throwing my arms around his neck and hugging him. �Thank you, sweetheart! I really appreciate this. Just let me take a quick shower and get dressed, then we�ll go.� I darted up the stairs before Logan could get out another protest.
Number One Rule of Getting a Guy to Do Something He Doesn�t Want to Do: Strike fast and get him to say �yes� before he fully grasps what�s going on.
**
12:28 pm
�So you�re going to this party, huh?� Logan said as we walked down an aisle in one of the mall�s department stores. I looked over at him beside me, blending in better than I had expected in jeans and a button-down shirt. Only the sideburns and powerful walk screamed �Wolverine.� �Um hmm.� I hummed in reply. It had been part of the price to tell him why we were shopping.
�Going without us, huh?�
�Look, I know you guys have that weekend all set up to go down as a group to the boat. Go for it. This is just something for me to do while you�re gone. So don�t go telling all the others.� I stopped to eye some interesting looking shirts. �After all, it�s over at the Brigham Manor�and you know Tammy.� Logan grunted in assent. �And,� I added as I pulled one of the shirts off the rack and held it up, �Max and her boys will be there. You know them too.�
�Oh.� Logan drawled the syllable out in such a way that I snapped my head around to look at him. He crossed his arms and propped himself against a pillar. �I get it.�
�Get what?� I mentally kicked myself. Number One Rule of Asking Questions: Don�t ask if you don�t want an answer.
�I remember Max and her guys, all right. I went over there with Gil and Legolas when that whole thing happened. And I really remember that one that you like�what was his name?� I rolled my eyes up to the ceiling. Logan knew damn well who he was talking about. He snapped his fingers. �Yeah. Hando, that�s it. Ya still hot for him?�
I immediately blushed, and I felt like burying my face in the shirt to hide. I resisted the impulse and met Logan�s eyes full on. There was no anger or resentment there�Logan and I had had the �Hando Conversation� already, and I wasn�t worried about Logan�s reactions on that subject anymore. I mustered up all my dignity and replied, �I prefer �pleasantly warm,� thank you very much.�
�Bull�.� He stopped himself in the nick of time as a woman and child ambled by. Odd how Logan�s gentlemanly side kicked on and off. He finished the phrase with ��crap.�
I arched my eyebrow at him. �You finished teasing me yet?� My face was so red it felt hot. Hando was kind of a �blushing issue� with me. I hung the shirt back up and pressed my hands to my cheeks.
Logan had the nerve to shake his head and smirk. �Nope.�
I was at a loss for words, so I just stomped my foot. He just kept smirking. Finally, I collected my wits. �And just for that, we�re going over here.� I took his arm and steered him out of the store, across the hall, and right into the Bath and Body Works shop. Let him and his sharp sense of smell have fun in here.
**
1:54 pm
�Ah hah!� Logan jumped at my sudden pronouncement as I made a beeline for a rack of clothes. I was muttering the ancient prayer of all shoppers��please let there be one in my size, please let it be on sale�� I rifled through the hangers frantically. This looked like it would be perfect�if only they had one I could wear�.
Logan came up behind me and looked closely at the outfits I was tearing through. �Uh, Lady, you�re not thinking about actually wearing one of these�.�
�Why not?� I asked as I looked at the last couple.
�Because�well��
�Ah hah!� I crowed again as I held one up. �Found one!� I looked around for the nearest dressing room and made for it, leaving Logan to catch up again. I was in a stall and had the door shut before I heard his steps. �Uhh, Lady?�
�Come on in, Logan, guys stand in that little hallway all the time. And it�s not like there�s anyone else here.� I had a naughty thought about inviting Logan into the room with me, but I knew where that could lead. I didn�t want to get thrown out of here before I tried this on. I yanked off my regular clothes, then took it off the hanger, unzipped it and pulled it on, mentally cheering when I fastened everything correctly. I took a deep breath and turned to look.
It looked fantastic. I couldn�t believe it was really me in the mirror. Oh yeah, this was coming home with me. But I immediately realized that my current, comfy bra was not going to cut it. Damn. I was going to need one of those �whoa, are they supposed to do that?� bras. I carefully slid out of the outfit and began to put it back on its hanger, an idea forming in my head. A dangerous thing. I grinned at myself as I rose my voice.
�Logan, be a sweetheart and run over to the lingerie section for me. I need a black bra, not a push-up, but I do need an underwire. You know my size.�
I could almost hear him blinking. I really didn�t expect him to do it, but I couldn�t resist the opportunity to mess with Logan a little, especially since he had hassled me about Hando. After a second of silence, I cracked the door open and stuck my head out, showing some bare shoulder. �Logan?�
He stared at me. �Lady, you have got to be kidding�.� I simply looked at him. I could imagine the gears in his head stripping. Finally he crossed his arms and shook his head. �Uh nuh.�
I laughed. He hadn�t buckled. Good for him. Good to know I hadn�t turned him into a complete pussycat. �S�okay. Just messing with ya.� Logan narrowed his eyes and I winked. �Payback�s a bitch, huh?� I pulled myself back inside and got dressed, then slung my new acquisition over my shoulder.
Breezing by Logan toward the cash register, I remarked, �We�re gonna have to go to a specialty place for this anyway. There�s a Victoria�s Secret right down the hall.� I so wanted to look over my shoulder to see the look on his face.
But it would have ruined the effect.
**
2:11 pm
He dug his heels in at the front, refusing to step onto the plush pink carpeting inside the Victoria�s Secret store. Pink everywhere, my least favorite color. This was not my favorite place to go into either. Number One Rule of Entering Frilly Lingerie Stores: Don�t do it alone. I leaned in close to Logan and said softly, �Please? I don�t want to go in alone. It freaks me out too.� He looked at me and blew out a long breath through his nose. But he didn�t fight me when I looped an arm through his and led him in.
Immediately, we were attacked by a pretty blond salesgirl with a perky grin. �Hi! Can I help you folks this afternoon?� Both of us almost recoiled from this incessant perkiness, but I recovered quickly. �I need a good bra to go along with this.� I made a motion with the bag draped over my other arm.
�Ah, okay! All of our individual bras are here in the back�� She started walking, and we followed. I spotted a gorgeous full-length silk nightgown in a deep blue, my favorite color, and nudged Logan. �Now, I�d wear that.�
He grinned at me and pointed at the black lace teddy hanging next to it. �What about that?�
�Uh, no. That looks like a constant itch waiting to happen.�
�You�re not supposed to wear it that long.�
The girl turned on her heel and looked at Logan, her smile looking suspiciously flirtatious. �You�re a brave man, helping your�.sister�.shop.� The question was so clear in her voice that I turned my head to hide my face against Logan�s arm. I had to in order to keep from giving that question the answer it deserved. Either that or burst into laughter.
Logan had better luck than I coming up with a good response. �My girlfriend��he emphasized the word��needed a little backup. This isn�t really her thing.�
At that, I lifted my head and gave him a swat. He just smirked and kissed my forehead. I looked to see the girl�s face fall a bit. *Sorry honey.* She gestured to the entire wall-and-a-half of bra displays and said, �Here you go.�
I quickly said, �Thanks� and went for the racks, not waiting for her to offer her help. As she walked away, I muttered, �Your girlfriend?�
�What did ya want me to call you? My mistress?�
I couldn�t help a little giggle. �That would�ve really blown her mind. You�re an evil man, Logan.�
He leaned over and nuzzled my ear. �Learned from the best.�
I grinned and shoved my clothes into his hand. �Hold these. Unless you want to wade through these things.� I pointed at the bras.
A weird look ghosted over his face as he took the bag. �No thanks. I�m good.�
**
2:38 pm
So we managed to get out of Victoria�s Secret mostly unscathed, me with some necessary undergarments and Logan with a sigh of relief. I checked my watch, then rubbed his chest lightly. �Hang in there, big guy, we�re almost done.�
�Really?� He couldn�t hide the hopeful note in his voice.
�Yeah. I just gotta get some shoes and accessories.� The words of doom to any male accompanying a female shopper. I giggled at his crestfallen expression and looped my empty arm around his waist. �Don�t worry. It�ll be okay.� I�m not sure what Logan hissed under his breath, but I�m sure I would�ve hit him for it.
**
3:32 pm
�Your feet are too big,� Logan grumbled. We had been looking at shoes for almost an hour, and we were having no luck.
�Look, it�s not my fault I�m a size 11-1/2. It�s genetics.� I had big feet. It was next to impossible to find anything besides the basics in size 10 or above. It was almost frustrating enough to wonder if I really needed my toes�
Then I saw them out of the corner of my eye. I immediately changed direction and speedwalked to the wall display, snatching up the shoes I�d spotted. �Now these would be perfect!� I dropped to my knees and started rummaging through the boxes underneath, praying to see the magic number.
Logan ran his hand over his face. �You�re determined to drive me insane, aren�t you?�
�Too late.� I shot back with a wink. Logan just groaned and collapsed into a nearby chair. At that exact instant, I found it. 11-1/2. I couldn�t believe it. I popped open the box and pulled the shoes out, holding them up.
Logan gave the shoes a quick eye and asked, �How the hell are you supposed to get into those things?�
�Funny, I asked the same thing about some of those bras.� I quickly pulled off my tennis shoes and shoved my feet into the shoes in question, pulling, tugging, and lacing. �Ohhh yeah, these are good.� I stood up and took several long strides. �Surprisingly comfy, too. What do you think?�
Logan looked up and said, �Great. Gorgeous. You�re beautiful. Let�s go.�
I walked back, sat down on his lap, and hugged him. �I�m glad to see you like them.�
He hugged me back and asked, �Can we go?�
�You do have a one-track mind, don�t you? Yeah, we can go. Just one more thing now.�
**
4:49 pm
I fingered a thick silver neck cuff and smiled. �I wonder if I should wear this, just in case Spike gets frisky�� I was talking to myself, but Logan had damn sharp ears. I kept forgetting that.
�Who�s Spike?� He asked from his station against the wall, staying as far away from the rows of glittering jewelry as he could. I was starting to feel bad for him, but I would be done soon. I wasn�t much of a jewelry person. I looked up at him and shook my head. �Don�t worry about it.� Logan opened his mouth, then shut it.
I held up a silver chain with letters spelling out �Bad Kitty.� Uh no. Most of this stuff was so damn tacky�.I cringed at the plastic ones painted to look like stones. I gave up on the store and walked out without telling Logan. It took him a few seconds to realize it, and I glanced back to see him looking lost in the midst of this teenager�s accessory store. When it dawned on him that I was gone, he bolted like a scared horse and came skidding up to me. �Don�t do that again.�
�What, leave you alone in a pink-themed store surrounded by jewelry and teenagers?�
�Uh huh.� This time, he put his arm around my waist and took hold of one of my belt loops. �I should put a leash on you, girl.�
�Later babe, later.� As we passed by yet another store, another rack of jewelry caught my eye. �There�s some more.� I tried to change direction, but Logan�s grip held fast. I stumbled against him as I lost my balance. �What?�
�Last one. Please?�
I patted his shoulder reassuringly. �Last one. Promise.�
He nodded and let me walk into the store, his arm still glued around me. Logan was very capable of picking me up and hauling me out if he wanted to, and I had the feeling I�d better be quick.
Wonder of wonders, I saw an entire row of necklaces that looked to be right up my alley. I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. One near the end of the row jumped out at me, and I reached for it. �Here we are,� I held up the chosen necklace. �This�ll work.� Even before I�d lowered my arm, Logan snatched it out of my hand and headed for the register. �Great. My treat.�
**
5:09 pm
I handed Logan the ice cream cone. �My treat.� Logan had a weakness for Dairy Queen ice cream, and he had more than earned it today. I ate a spoonful of my Snickers blizzard, hands and arms free for the first time all afternoon. Logan was carrying everything on one arm and holding the cone with the other hand. I started laughing again, and he looked over at me in mid-lick. �What?�
�You look like a pack mule.� Logan looked down at everything he was carrying and shrugged.
I ate a couple more spoonfuls as I watched him eat his ice cream. He knew I was watching. So I started to have fun with my spoon, and within a few steps we were both going at our treats with a vigor that probably should�ve carried an R-rating. I finally had to stop as my tongue started to go numb. �Ack, I think I wore out my tongue.� Logan roared with laughter, enough to attract the attention of several bystanders, and I socked him in the arm.
After he wound down, I asked, �You need me to carry anything? Or do you have everything?� I felt kind of guilty with him carrying it all.
He shook his head, slid the bag handles from his hand over his wrist, and switched his cone to the newly free hand. Then he threw the empty arm around me again. �Nope, I�ve got everything.�
I smiled and matched my steps to his so I could put my head on his shoulder. �Charmer.�
�We leaving?�
I nodded. �Yeah.�
**
6:10 pm
I hung everything up on the hook on the back of my door and let out a long sigh. It had been fun, but I was glad it was over. And I know I wasn�t the only one after almost six hours of shopping. Now I remembered why I didn�t do this very often.
A soft tap came at my door. I cracked it open to see Logan leaning against the doorjamb. �Hey Lady.�
�Hey, big guy. I really appreciate you coming with me. I know it wasn�t much fun for you, but thank you anyway.�
Logan shouldered the door completely open and took me in his arms. �Nah, it wasn�t all that bad. Got to spend a lot of time with you. It was worth it.�
I sighed and hugged him hard. �You want a private fashion show?� I asked with a purr in my voice.
�Absolutely.�
�Then get thee gone, knave! You can see the end result, but not the process!� I laughed and gave him a small hip check. Logan held up his hands and stepped back so I could shut the door.
For what seemed like the hundredth time today, I shed my clothes. I pulled everything out of their bags and boxes, then hauled on the new underwear, slid into the outfit, pulled on the shoes, and clipped the necklace on. I looked into the full-length mirror and grinned at what I saw. �Oh, hell yeah,� I whispered. I sauntered back over to the door and opened it while saying, �Now, I�m gonna pull my hair up� � My voice trailed off as Logan looked me up and down. The expression in his eyes made my toes curl. �Uh,� my voice had gone breathy, �I take it that you like?�
�Damn Lady, damn.� He slowly paced around me, then tilted his head. �What�s that on the back�a handle?� I squawked and retaliated, but he easily ducked the balled-up T-shirt I threw at him.
�You look great.� He paused. �Even if it is for some other guys.� My blush started up again right on cue, and he just winked. �They better appreciate it.�
I stepped back up to him and rubbed my cheek along his sideburn. �I�m sure they will. We should go shopping again for clothes to wear at home.�
�Oh, I already started today.� His words startled me, and I pulled back, giving him a surprised look. �Huh?�
Logan leaned out of the room to snag something off of the hall table. Whatever it was, it was wrapped in tissue paper. He handed it to me and I stared at it. When had he gotten this? I pulled the tissue away, and silk spilled into my hands.
It was the ice-blue nightgown from Victoria�s Secret. I looked up at him, my mouth falling open. When did he have time to do that? As if he had heard the thought, Logan answered, �When you were in the dressing room there, fighting with those fancy�.�
�Harnesses,� I interrupted him and we both laughed. �Well, I suppose I�ll have to try this on�do you mind giving me one more opinion today?�
Logan made a show of thinking, then gave me his slow, lazy grin. �I think I can manage it.�
Number One Rule of Training Clones? Reward, baby. Reward.
END