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| Author: ::angel of insanity:: | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Title: "Isabel" | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| History: Version 1.0 - 2001.12.04; Version 2.0 - 2001.12.05 for Chronicles of Ayenee; Version 2.3 - 2001.12.05 for FanFiction.net; Version 2.4 for LiveJournal.com; Version 3.0 [Now With HTML!] for Kat's Lair and ::angel of insanity:: 2003.09.24 | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Rating: PG-13 (just a little tiny bit of lime-flavored tang) | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Special: It's an early birthday present for my beau (2001.12.29). Happy 16th darling!! ^____^ | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Archive: Yes, but please email me at [email protected] and ask first if you would like to host this brainchild o' mine. Thank you. ^__^ | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| ~*~ | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| He seems angry. No... not angry. Unhappy. Lonely. Broken. He doesn't understand why I need to leave him behind forever. So it should be. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I must hurt him this way because if he finds what I really am he'll... I don't know what. I cannot compromise my purpose like that. Ever. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| "Why? Why Isabel?" He grabs my shoulders and shakes me, still as gentle as when he first touched me. I look into his eyes and see the tears he cannot cry shine like stars. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| "I never told you I would stay forever." | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| "You told me you loved me." | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Images of our past begin to flow through my mind. A river of color and sound. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Night. Lovers. Two entwined bodies that glow with an unearthly light as the moon reflects silver streams from their moist skin. A soft moan. A sigh. Quiet breathing. A whispered "I love you". | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I close my eyes and breathe in sharply. Those are memories I should not dwell on right now. "I never told you I would stay forever, Andrew." | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| He exhales slowly at his name, trying to keep his composure. I'm killing him slowly. I notice the cowlick on the side of his head that used to irritate him so is standing straight up, away from his scalp. "Would you at least tell me where the hell you're going?" | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I flinch at his use of language, but do not ask for an apology, nor does he offer. It would be too much. He only said it to emphasize his point: You're in the wrong here Izzy. "Home." | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| "Home? Home?!" His voice rises steadily, as if he's beginning to panic. Which he is. "You live here woman! ....With me....." He looks away and then back, his eyes shining again. Again he asks the question I can't answer: "Why Iz?" | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| We've been together for six years, eight months, ten days, three hours, fifteen minutes, and forty-five seconds. It has been the happiest period of time in my lifespan of several thousand millennia. Missed in the blink of an eye for a being such as myself, but an extremely wonderful time nonetheless. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I am a being of the light. A watcher. An angelos. My name is Israfel. Angel of music, poetry, tears, and the Final Judgement. I have been recalled to Heaven. I cannot stay any longer... as much as I want to. "I have to go Andrew... and I don't think I'll see you for a very long time. I'm sorry." | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| He frowns and mimics me, eyes narrowed "'I'm sorry.' That's it?! Isabel Samantha, I am not going to crawl on my knees to keep you here. If you want to go, go right ahead." His eyes relax and glitter again. "But I'm coming after you-" | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| "Andrew-" I am silenced when he moves swiftly to close the few feet between us and grabs my wrists, holding them up between our chests. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| "Because I love you more than anything on this whole Earth." His nose is within three centimeters of my own. He stares into my eyes. "And you are more important than even my own salvation." | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 'Even my own salvation.' | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| My lips fuse with his as he captures them in a mind-numbing kiss. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| But Andrew, my mortal and my love: I am your salvation… | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| ~*~ | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| A cavernous white room. A booming voice. Michael. 'You will go to Earth, Israfel.' | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 'Yes Michael.' | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 'And you will save his soul from damnation.' | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 'Yes Michael.' | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| A kind smile lights the face of the Archangel Michael. For me. My heart flutters in an innocent attraction. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 'Good luck littlest one.' | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I smile as well. 'Thank you Archangel.' | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| ~*~ | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I watch his face as he sleeps. Every crease on his brow disappears and he possesses the face of an unworried child again. He is beautiful. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Each kiss he tenderly places on my neck and chest burns as if I've been touched by a hot coal. His body moves slowly and purposefully over mine, warming my skin with the friction. My lips seek his and find them as we melt into each other again. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| "Isabel. I love you." | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| "And I love you as well Andrew." | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| He closes his eyes tightly and fights to control himself. Gaining the upper hand, he opens his eyes and gazes at me softly. "Are you still leaving?" | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I give him a small smile and run both my hands through his light brown hair. "Yes. I must." | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| He returns the smile, though it is a sad and resigned one. "Alright Iz. Go when you have to." | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| My speech and breathing become broken and irregular as I tumble over the edge. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| "An... dy." | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I curse this earthly flesh and all its weaknesses, while curiously examining the red marks and small bruises covering my thighs and hips. As many times as Andrew and I have given ourselves to each other, I have not become used to the pleasure or the pain. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Goosebumps rise on my bare skin as a soft breeze steals through the window. I move closer to Andrew, who protectively encloses me in his embrace. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 'And you will save his soul from damnation.' | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I stare at his relaxed face, illuminated softly by the moon. I remember when, just three nights ago I saw him exactly like this and I understood that my time here was over. I have saved him, though I don't know how or even when I did. But saved is saved, and I must go. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| My heart aches with the knowledge that I will not see him again until I call him from his grave at the end of time. Will he marry a beautiful woman and have many wonderful children? My stomach twists in that distinctly human feeling of jealousy. Will he forget about me? His Izzy? I hastily close my eyes and clamp my teeth tightly together before the misery in my heart escapes. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| She can have him on earth, but he is mine for eternity. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Resolve firmly set, I slowly pull away from his body and ignore the growing pain of loneliness in my chest. After dressing, I leave a note for him, and covering him up with the sheets on the bed, I step outside. Then, raising my hands to the stars, I pray. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I love you Andrew. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| ~*~ | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Dearest: | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I chose to leave in the night because it was the easiest for us both to cope with. It had to be done. Don't hate me. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I want you to continue living. Find a girl. Get married. Buy a house. Have children. Do not wait for me to return, because I won't. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| We will see each other again, but not for a very long stretch. Afterward, we can be together until the end of time... and beyond. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| All my eternal love, | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Iz | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||