| blind spots 04.21.02 |
| It's such a blessing when you're sitting in church on Sunday morning and realize that today's sermon is EXACTLY what you need. There are some times when you're listening and you have no idea how you can apply it to your life. Then there are other days, like today, where you can't wait to rush out and begin applying it. Today's message was titled "Blind Spots," referring to any weaknesses in our lives that we are unaware of. Just like a driver's blind spot or a football player's blind spot, they need devices to first of all identify the weak spots, but also help in preventing any injuries or attacks on them. The point was to show us another reason why we need each other, our brothers and sisters in Christ. "Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses." (Proverbs 27:5-6). Oftentimes in our friendships, we see areas of weaknesses in our friends but fail to point them out in fear of offending our friend. Or sometimes we ARE aware of them, yet don't want to face them, so we only associate with people who will not critique us, but this does nothing for our growth. It is great to be considerate of their feelings, yet at the same time, if the person is truly our friend, don't we want to warn them and guide them back in the right direction? Sometimes this can be taken to the extreme, where so-called friends point out blind spots with a holier-than-thou attitude. That's not the right attitude to have. The critique MUST be done within a loving relationship where there is already a sense of trust between the two. It goes unspoken that the "open rebuke" is done out of love and only that. Pastor D. gave examples from his own life of people that he has relationships like this with, where he is kept accountable on a regular basis. He encouraged the congregation to also find people to be accountable with and to engage in this type of loving relationship that fosters growth with constructive criticism. I thought about my closest friends and how none of them are even in town. They don't know what is going on in my life except for what I choose to tell them. I am honest with them about my struggles but what if I chose not to? How do they know that I'm not out every night getting drunk or wasting my life away? For all they know, my e-mails of peachy days and relaxing nights are all lies. (Don't worry, I'm not REALLY going out getting drunk or wasting away...) What I need is someone here who can keep closer tabs on me and make sure that I'm doing okay spiritually...someone who sees me on a regular basis...and I was a little sad that I did not already have someone. I thought of CH, whom I met up with on Friday. We have never been extremely close friends, but we try to meet up every once in awhile, like when I came back for the holidays. We always have a good time talking no matter how much time has passed since we last hung out. We both open up to one another easily and I respect and trust her. I made a mental note to bring this up to her, to see if we could do some of this accountability stuff. After lunch, I got a phone call from her and she told me that she thought of me during the message. I went over to her place and we talked a bit and realized that we can relate to each other in terms of struggles and goals in our spiritual lives. It would be great to be able to hold each other accountable. Now we just have to figure out how we want to do this, but I think that finding someone is the biggest hurdle, and it was easily done--praise God! In addition, I'd like to take my friendships with people to the next level, like with my close friends. I think we often walk on egg shells when it comes to sticky subjects. I admire friends who can outrightedly tell their brothers or sisters in Christ where they are failing, but out of love, of course. I know that I don't like to offend people, and my friends feel the same, but I also feel that being as close as we are, we should also be watching out for one another's blind spots, rather than looking the other way and just treading lightly on sensitive ground. If we are truly concerned about one another, and we know that a sister is going the wrong way, we do have some responsibility in meeting them there and helping them back. We don't have to be flawless to be able to do this. As close friends, we should understand that we, too, will accept any guidance from them. It may take some getting used to, to take the criticism, but I must be reminded that it's for my own good, and that without my brothers and sisters in Christ watching out for my blind spots, no one else will. |
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