the worm

Every Sunday, Girl Erin (as opposed to Boy Aaron), tells me that she can do The Worm. She always tells me but is always really hesitant to show me. One week she actually tried it on the table and nearly injured herself. She used to be one of the more troublesome kids, but she turned out to be one of my favorites. She's one of the meaner ones to me, too, but she also just likes to play around with me a lot.

One of the things I will miss when I leave is the Sunday School kids. They give me a lot of grief and headache, but all in all, I really care for them, too. Working with them doesn't just mean throwing together a lesson the night before and trying to keep the occupied for an hour. We've learned that it means really figuring out what works best for them, and what they need, especially as kids who have grown up in church. Allen and I have realized that we need to take a lot of time to pray for them...to get God's vision for these kids. They're bored with the same Bible stories...bored with the same morals of the stories...they need to be challenged. But how do you challenge 2nd and 3rd graders? How do you make them think about their relationship with Christ without going too far over their heads?

Another challenge and burden on my heart: a new teacher to take over my place when I leave. Allen is great with the kids...and just when I thought we wouldn't be able to replace Mike with someone, God gave us Allen. I almost feel like I have to conduct interviews, because I want to make sure the next teacher really cares about the kids and really wants to be there. It's frustrating because I see that these are amazing, intelligent, funny kids, but they are also restless and need to be challenged. They need someone who will be a little outlandish if needed or go the extra mile to present a classic Bible story in a new light. We get these kids for one hour a week...how can we make that extra hour more influential and memorable than the hours spent in their public classrooms in the following five days?

Sometimes I'm really, really tempted to stay here longer...surely I can make it until July. Is it *that* bad to just pinch pennies for a little while longer? But I can't. It's not all about just having the money. It's also about demonstrating to God that, yes, I'm ready to give something up for You, and I'm willing to serve wherever you place me, even if it's in Sacramento. How do people do it? How do people build up communities and surround themselves with loving people, only to tear themselves away from it? I feel like it's going to be even harder than when I first left Sac for San Francisco. I was ready to leave...and I thought I was ready to leave SF...but now the doubts are back.

It's funny on my first web site, I wrote, "I left my heart in Sacramento," but ironically, four years later, I have to admit, I'm leaving it in San Francisco.