My Poetry
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You Deserve Better Than This
Our time apart is drawing near
And I get you up
But gently you whisper in my ear
I deserve better than this
I know this is true
But I'm frightened of what you want me to do
I only want you to be happy
And if there is some way to get you there
Simply let me know
I guess my hugs and kisses can't suffice
So just name your price
I want you to go there
I think you want to be there too
I am glad in your satisfaction
I love to see you smile
I guess I can set aside my masochistic ways for you this once
Only for a short while.
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I Don't Know What To Do
I'm losing one addiction
And trying to replace it with you,
I guess I am wrong for trying to do that.
You say slide and that's cool
Anything you want.
I'll just keep waiting for you,
But right now I don't know what to do.
You say suck untill your numb,
Easily done, so long as I can get a rise out of you.
I'll make you happy and try not to leave anything on you blue.
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Just For You
Serenly content in my day to day
With a solemn promiss I will find my way
And if that is with you
Then that's ok.
Do you feel the way that I feel?
Does your heart skip a beat?
Or do you still pain from a lost love,
I can give you a hand to help you
If only you knew
The way I truely felt.
I'll keep going on.
I'd rather not go alone.
But regardless of that I am happy.
And I wish you were with me,
I wish I could open your eyes,
I wish you could honestly see,
The love waiting for you in my heart,
Just give some sort of sign so I can start.
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(untitled)
I woke up this morning and you were there.
What did I do the night before?
Wake up oblivious.
Go to sleep erotica.
Night after night this happens.
No idea where I have been.
Only the remains
Wipe me out.
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Pain of Abandonment
Leave,
My cell becomes my home.
I am a prisoner bound by four white walls.
Inside my mind,
Encircled by vultures my sanity crawls.
With every dive a little more psychotic.
Bound by four white walls that have eyes.
The more I stare at it the more it lies.
Losing my mind with every hypnotic voice.
What sanity I have is lost in a desert.
It cannot survive,
I'm not sure I want it to.
Now I'm rethinking being alive.
With one gentle snap it all becomes clear.
I've lost my mind,
I should not fear.
Now the only thing holding me back from the world,
Are these four white walls and an encircling bird.
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Isolation and Masturbation
Desolate in my forgotten mind,
Lonely in my abundance of time,
A life without touch can effect you so much.
Wishing for a guiding hand,
To take you to a different land.
A hope for salvation,
A gain of self mudilation.
There is no time but the present.
Never forget your wounds.
They will come back to soon.
In the end there are only two things,
Isolation
and
Masturbation.
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A Metaphor
The rock stands still,
It weathers without worry.
Kinda like time,
But time is in no hurry.
The rock lives on still,
But is still a little bit older.
Thanks to the hands of time,
Who on life seem ten times colder.
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(untitled)
Smells of toxins fill my head
So slowly I left my soul
Finding my vessel lying dead
Vibrations left of what I said
Like leering into a dark whole
I looked so long my sight turned red
And from my tears I began to dread
The sight I had seen
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Hung
I live in an excuse,
For what my life gives to me, a knuse,
Gripping round my vestal neck.
And kicking my sanity from beneath me.
My torturious excape from life is my excuse.
I choke and struggle,
A wrotting decay,
Everyone and everything,
Never to obey.
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(wrote on a napkin at Denny's)
I walked a lonely path to nowhere
I had left everyone else behind
In front of me stood a tree of decision
I took the wrong path I was blind
And could it be that in front of me I faced my greatest foe?
And could it be that in front of me my weakness would show?
As my body did walk along I did grow in fear
Without knowing what would lie ahead
My soul did cry a single tear
And allmost suddenly my heart was full of shame
And my legs gave out and I became lame
A fate worse than expierence
Unexpierence, not to know what is ahead
And lay in the past till you are
Forgotten and dead
And still decades later
No one will know of the courage and bravery
I did show
And the mention of someone's name
Would make no difference all the same
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Speechless Friend
You don't really impress me.
I've known you for so long but in your
Ignorance and fakeness.
You have yet to know me.
I am going to save you the trouble of feeling regret.
I am going to make you say all that I know is true.
Then after I am done,
I'll be threw with you.
You try to hide behind those who wouldn't know better.
But now they do.
You've been caught in your lies,
And todays the day they all come back on you.
Too many opportunities now to have some understanding.
Childish you are to me,
Weak to the world,
With your eyes closed and your ears covered.
Don't preach to me,
You hypocrite.
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