"I first met Thranduil at the end of the Second Age, when all the armies of Men and Elves stood on the Dagorlad Plains. The Last Alliance had gathered before Sauron's gates to bring down his evil plans, to put an end to the One Ring and the darkness growing in Arda. Oropher had gathered the Alliance out of desperation. Even then, Mirkwood was a dangerous place and grew more so with each passing day. He knew that the only way for his Silvan elves to survive was take the war to Sauron. Oropher was a wise Elf who understood the curse visited on all of us by Sauron.
"Gil-Galad and I often sought each other's company during that dark, perilous time. We frequently crept from each other's tents near dawn after a long night of lovemaking. We drank deeply of each other fearing that time, as well as Sauron, was our enemy. How right we were. For Gil-Galad, the noble warrior, perished with so many others.
"Oropher, too, perished that fateful day.
He kept his army separated from us as much as possible, though why I do not
know. I believe they resented us, those of us who were of the Noldor line.
I believe, as well, he harbored a hatred of those who came from my brother's
loins, descendants who held the longevity beyond the means of normal Men.
He charged, that noble King, before Gil-Galad gave the orders and all was
nearly lost by one careless action.
"And I, in my grief, let Isilduir walk away with the One Ring. Thranduil,
who had lost his father and most of his army, gathered up his dignity and
made ready for the long march back to Mirkwood. I took the remnants of the
forces let by Gil-Galad and myself back along the same road.
"On that road, Thranduil and I shared more than grief.
"Sitting beneath the stars on the third night of our travel, Thranduil and I sat after a light meal of lembas and water, as that was all that our armies carried then, he and I spoke for the first time of the thoughts which gripped us both. 'I fear that as time goes on, I shall regret not stopping Isilduir.' I began, my mind drifting over that final glimpse of the Man as he exited the chasm.
"Thranduil thought quietly for a moment, taking his time before formulating a reply. 'I believe that the One Ring still has mischief to make, but I cannot say that there is any thing that you could have done, save slaying Isilduir, that would have made any difference.'
"I welcomed this rationale for it released me from my own responsibility. 'What of you, my friend? Mirkwood is still not safe, yet you insist on returning. You have not the armies to defeat all the darkness and I have not the resources to aid you. Would it not be better to abandon the forest?'
"Thranduil instantly bristled at the thought. 'Nay, Elrond, I cannot abandon my home, nor would I ask my people to do this. We have fought all these years to keep Mirkwood and I will not give up simply because my father is dead.'
"I studied him in the starlight, noticing how his hair sparkled and gathered the stars to his eyes. There remained in him, despite his grief, a strength and fierceness that knew nothing of retreat. He was devoted to his people, even then, and I suspect, this alone is the reason for his decisions and the choices which none but him has ever understood. I found myself strangely attracted to him, at that moment. I suppose, looking back, that perhaps in the moonlight he reminded me of Gil-Galad. You could see his strength and determination. The things I admired most in Gil-Galad. I did not so much make a decision as I acted on impulse. My intent, I told myself later, was only to offer comfort and strength to one who had lost so much.
"I reached out and laid my hand over his, gently squeezing his fingers between my own. When he turned to me with his blue eyes reflecting the starlight and his silver hair gleaming as though alight with silver fire, I was undone. Leaning forward, I kissed him, only lightly. Before I knew it, Thranduil was in my arms.
"His lips seared mine; his hunger transmitted down my spine. For my part, I closed my eyes and dreamed that, once again, the lips captured within my own were those of Gil-Galad. My hands pulled through his long hair, feeling the fine strands slide between my fingers like the finest satin. His hands tugged at my armor, pulled desperately at my tunic until he encountered heated flesh. I allowed this. I wanted and needed to touch; to be touched and to feel, for the moment, as though I were not alone. Again.
"Thranduil's skin was hot beneath my fingers, almost fevered. I delighted in the scent and feel of his Elven flesh. Every skill I'd learned from Gil-Galad I applied to the new King of Mirkwood. My tongue traced circles over his flat male nipples. My fingers skimmed lightly over his muscled back. In my mind, those soft moans were those of Gil-Galad, not Thranduil.
"When he pushed my leggings over my hips, I pushed his head down on to me, needing to feel his mouth on me. As Thranduil's hot mouth took me all the way to the back of his throat, I moaned and bit down hard on my own tongue lest I call out to Gil-Galad in my passion. His tongue danced wickedly over me until I could no longer think.
"Having had more than enough torture, I pushed Thranduil over on to his back and reciprocated in kind. His hands twined in my hair, tugging and pulling at my braids until I thought I should be bald come morning. Urgently, I pushed his legs forward, against his chest. He did not resist me and I entered him, stifling his cries with rough kisses.
"Afterwards, as I lay atop him, breathing heavily, he whispered words in my ear that broke my heart and flooded me with a shame that, to this day, blisters me with it's heat. 'I love you, Elrond. I have loved you since the moment I laid eyes upon you.'
"I swallowed my anguish. I could not return his soft words, nor could I lie and say what I did not feel. What I offered in return was meant to be comfort. 'I am ever your friend, Thranduil. I hope you will always know that.'
"I felt him stiffen and grow distant, even as his face crumbled and he turned away so that I would not see his grief. 'Yes, Elrond, friends we shall ever be.'
"I kissed the tear that slid from the corner of his eye. He would have removed himself from my embrace, had I allowed it. But I did not. I would not use him so cruelly and then leave him alone in the night. I wrapped us both in my cloak and held him close to me throughout the night.
"Never again did we speak of love or of friendship. Nay, truly we've hardly spoken since. We exchange emissaries. I watch him hoard silver and shiny gems, ever trying to accumulate beauty to him. I watch Mirkwood grow more and more treacherous. I hear of his burrow beneath the mountains; of Elves living like Dwarves. I watch as what happened so long ago between us grows. I despaired for the King of Mirkwood as he turned his sorrow into rage and used it as a weapon.
"Now I have been forced to bear witness to all that transpired that night. I should not have told you, for these thoughts, these memories you should not have to bear. You are not responsible. Yet, you bring joy and light where there was darkness. I hope that you will forgive me. I should never have allowed that night to happen. Even so, how can I deny the beauty that came from it?
"Thranduil never held my heart, but he has always held my respect. In truth, he eventually held something far more precious than this beating thing within my chest. Who am I to look back in time and judge? He no longer judges, I think, for he, too must admit that nothing came of that night save beauty and starlight. From our grief we were forced to walk a path of darkness and we both emerged, better and stronger, for our efforts.
"Your presence here, now, attests to his forgiveness. Despite the horrible mistakes I've made, Thranduil has forgiven me. I know for certain this is true, Legolas, for he has sent you here to Imladris. He has chosen to risk sacrificing his son and heir to correct a mistake I made centuries ago."
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