Excerpts from Erestor's Journal
3019 February 17
Post Script
I decided a final cup of tea would help me sleep. I wish I'd leapt off the
balcony first. I came across Glorfindel. He looked quite dapper in his silver
tunic and green leggings. The silver next to his hair is exceptionally striking
and he knows it, I am sure. He had a bottle of wine, of course, and was creeping
along the corridor. I can only guess to where. When he saw me, he paused to
say good night, though he did manage to look somewhat sheepish.
I watched him enter King Thranduil's chambers. I think I shall make my final proposal to the King tomorrow so that we may depart for home. I have business that has been too long unattended.
3019 February 18
The King of Mirkwood is a cagey man indeed. I could only get a promise to
consider Lord Elrond's proposal. He was cranky and short tempered all morning
and seemed inclined to be argumentative. I assume Glorfindel was a less than
satisfactory lover.
We will depart for Rivendell in the morning.
3019 February 19
King Thranduil was still in a foul temper, but was kind enough to give me
a steed so that I would not have to ride pillion behind Glorfindel. We started
at first light and made excellent headway.
I have spent the evening going over some of the finer points of the agreement between Mirkwood and Rivendell. I do not think Elrond will be happy with this, but it was the best I could manage.
3019 February 21
Nothing new to report. The journey has become an unbearably tense and silent
affair. The tension has transmitted to the outriders. I can think of nothing
cheerful, though I have tried to be pleasant. Glorfindel is uncommunicative
and distant. In other words, he is his usual self.
3019 February 26
Disaster has once again struck the party. This time, instead of Orcs, which
I have feared at every turn, I fear I am the disaster. We camped by a stream
and I decided to take the opportunity to wash off some of the travel dust.
I had not intended to be gone long and informed the outriders where I was
going. I only wanted a moment alone and chance to wash off my face.
Apparently no one informed Glorfindel of my whereabouts and he tore apart the forest looking for me. When he finally found me, only a few hundred yards down stream from the camp he proceeded to have quite a temper tantrum. I cannot imagine why he was so upset, really. I was only sitting on a fallen tree, dangling my feet in the water. I told him that if he'd asked, the outriders would have told him where I had gone.
Glorfindel marched the length of the giant trunk and hauled me to my feet like a maid, screaming at me for being an impudent fool. I resented, quite rightly, I think, being treated like a child and told him so. We had a few more choice words, which I will not repeat here, and then he ordered me back to camp.
Of course, by then I was quite undone and blurted, to my utter shame and horror, that I thought I had fallen in love with him and I did not understand why he insisted on treating me like I was a human leper.
He stumbled and fell from the log. Unfortunately, he did not land in water, but on the rock-strewn riverbank. He has broken his ankle.
When I tried to apologize, he glared at me as though I was the cause of all his worldly troubles. In fact, I very well may be.
One outrider has gone to Rivendell to fetch t aid. I hope no Orcs take the opportunity to attack.
3019 February 27
Glorfindel insisted on pushing towards Rivendell this morning. To that end,
he ordered the outrider and I to help him aboard that infernal beast, Asfaloth.
We tried letting him ride alone, but that did not work out well. Then we tried
letting him ride behind me, but his horse made me nervous, despite Glorfindel's
assurances that Asfaloth would not let either of us fall. In the end, he rode
in front of me with his leg hooked over the pommel.
He dozed a great deal of the time.
3019 February 28
Elladan and Elrohir have at last caught up to us. Elrohir took Glorfindel
on ahead, being a great rider and quite comfortable with Asfaloth. I am left
with three outriders and Elladan.
I will be glad to be home again. According to Elladan, we should arrive at Rivendell midmorning.
3019 March 1
True to his word, Elladan led the party through Rivendell's gates just before
the noon hour. Lord Elrond tried to get me to rest, but I refused. I did not
want to spend the rest of the day moping about. In my absence things that
should have been done were left unfinished and I have much work to catch up
on.
Lord Elrond was not as displeased by the treaty as I feared. In fact, he praised me for getting so much from King Thranduil.
He is preparing to go to Lothlorien and has also sent word to the Dunedain. The inevitable is upon us. War again perches upon the shoulders of Middle Earth.
Elrond has said that Glorfindel is doing well. I have not gone to check on him, as I have no desire to face him at this time.
I must get my emotions back under control.
18 February 3019
In spite of having not spent time in Thranduil's company in many years, I
found that I could not enjoy him once I reached his chambers. I collided with
Erestor in the hall. He was on his way to the kitchens to filch a cup of tea.
When he saw me, he got the most peculiar expression on his face. He looked
almost lost and hurt. I hate to admit it, but I was uncomfortable. He said
nothing, of course, but he did not need to. Could I have missed some signal?
As for Thranduil, I wanted to talk and think and enjoy the company of a long time friend. He wanted sex. While I had been more than up for the challenge earlier, I found my appetite somewhat lacking once I reached his rooms. Strange.
On a less personal note, we will depart for Rivendell on the morning. I am looking forward to getting away from Thranduil. Erestor has remained quiet and aloof. His professionalism has finally returned. He has pushed King Thranduil unmercifully on behalf of E, but I know Mirkwood's king well enough to recognize his stubbornness when I see it. He will not openly commit. The best Erestor can hope for is a promise to consider sending troops to augment Rivendell's forces against Mordor.
Obviously Erestor takes this as a personal failure. Truly, I do not think he is to blame.
26 February 3019
An interesting turn of events has occurred. We departed Thranduil's hall as
expected. Travel has, up until now, gone rather well. My own stupidity and,
well, and Erestor's lack of communication has led us to a bit of trouble.
He went some ways down stream to wash up a bit. Erestor can be so fastidious. I can honestly say it is one of his most endearing traits. I noticed his absence and immediately assumed he'd wandered off on his own, pouting about some imagined slight. I stormed off, searching for him in the woods, without discussing my intent with the two outriders in my company. If I had, none of the following would have happened.
I eventually found him, sitting happily on a fallen tree trunk, dangling his feet in the water like an Elfling. I was so enraged that I stormed over and yanked him to his feet and shook him. I overreacted and I shouldn't have.
I released him, of course, after he decided to fight back in his own way. He used his formidable tongue, reminding me that he was E's seneschal. I backed away, realizing that I had gone too far as the silence that had held sway for the last few days erupted into a volatile argument.
As I walked back along the tree trunk, I heard words that I had never thought to hear from Erestor's lips.
He informed me, in a voice so soft I almost did not hear it, that he thought that he had fallen in love with me.
I lost my footing and landed rather awkwardly on the rocky shore. I have broken my ankle, but that is the least of my injuries. My pride is equally wounded. But no more so, I think, than Erestor's pride and heart. Now I begin to understand why he looked so sad when he saw me going to Thranduil's chambers. I also begin to understand his unusual behavior of late. I am not sure when this event happened or even how I feel about it.
I have much to think on. Fortunately, I will have plenty of time as my ankle heals.
I have sent an outrider back to alert E of this latest misfortune. We will, of course, continue on in the morning, as staying here and waiting for help would only invite trouble. I will sit behind Erestor on my horse, I think. The going will be slow and I doubt much that Erestor will care for the arrangement. There is nothing I can do about that.
27 February 3019
Asfaloth carried both Erestor and myself. The ride was slow and painful. Erestor
remained tense and quiet. Am exhausted.
1 March 3019
Arrived in Rivendell late on the 28th. Remember little of the trip, save that
I was with Elrohir while Elladan stayed with Erestor.
E has informed me that I should mend nicely.
I have been informed that Erestor arrived back in Imladris this morning. He has not come around to check on me. I am hurt that he has not bothered to come see me.
I gave E a full report of the last few weeks, including Erestor's rather peculiar confession that caused the breaking of my ankle. He gave me a quizzical look and asked me if I hadn't allowed the foreplay to go on too long.
I must admit the query has given me pause.
2 March 3019
Bored from lying in bed all day. Erestor has still not come to see me. My
disappointment grows exponentially. There must be some value to E's observations;
else I would not now feel so despondent and restless.
I do wish Erestor would come so we could talk.
I decided to take matters concerning Erestor and Glorfindel into my own hands. Obviously there is something between my chief advisor and seneschal, though one has openly admitted it and the other is slowly coming around to the idea.
I cornered Erestor earlier this evening and asked him to take Glorfindel's diner tray to him and keep him company in my stead. The ruse of too much paperwork and being tired worked rather well. Elladan and Elrohir were correct in saying that Erestor is easily manipulated. They, after all, should know.
Before bedtime I did go over to Glorfindel's rooms to check on his ankle and make sure that he and Erestor had at least talked.
Much to my surprise, I stumbled upon quite an interesting scene. I could only smile as I closed the door and crept back to my own rooms. Apparently Glorfindel decided that I was correct and the foreplay between them had gone on far too long. I am glad he was able to do something about it, despite his injury. I am sure he and Erestor were most careful.
Elladan and Elrohir will return to their second favorite pastime in the morn. Have put fresh satin sheets on the bed.