Tentative First Steps

Breaking with tradition, this is the first installation of the Children�s Series that is not a direct POV. I was planning on doing Trowa�s next but I was reading Erma Bombeck the other night and the part about the fridge being the communications center of the house struck me as true. Of course, by AC 195 it will be replaced by the main household mail terminal (which is kinda like the main phone in the house). My dream is that every home has an address for all of its inhabitants as well as a general one (�Occupants� mail) and that families will check these when they come home like we check messages now. You have your pick of video, voice or old-fashioned email types. In the fic, they will designated by type and the appropriate inserts (*beep* or whatever).

Oh, and it�s been a few months since the events in �The Blessed Arrival�. And while they may be about 6, they can act and sound older. When they want to. If it helps them get what they what. Anyone who�s every baby-sat knows what I mean. But maybe they won't get away this time��

Title: Tentative First Steps (Part of the Children�s Series)
Author: Lady DarkAngel   Ladydarkangel_1 @ yahoo.com
Archive: Lady DarkAngel's Gundam Wing Fanfiction Library
http://www.geocities.com/ladydarkangel_1/index.html, Darkflame�s (if she�ll take it�.) and anywhere else is fine, just ask me first
Category: Sap, Humor
Pairing(s): I *STILL* haven�t decided yet. Think what you will for now, nothing definite
Disclaimers: Gundam Wing or Shinkidousenki Gundam Wing is copyrighted and trademarked by Sunrise, Bandai, Sotsu Agency and associated parties with all rights and privileges. The characters were used without permission for the purposes of entertainment only. This is not meant for sale of profit. Any characters not created by those listed above are mine and hereby considered the sole property and copyright of the author.
Anyway, I�m just a poor college student. So can I play with them? I promise I won�t break them�... much.
Rating: PG
Warnings: Familial insanity, minor language and well, kids being kids. Any who has them or has baby-sat will understand.
Feedback: Kami-sama, YES!!! Ladydarkangel_1 @ yahoo.com (ignore the spaces); any and all comments are welcome like the sweet ego-sustainers they are.

To: The Maxwell Household <[email protected]>
From: Duo Maxwell <[email protected]>
Date: Mon 5 November AC 196 08:37:15
Type: Voice

*beep*

Heya Gang!

I�m gonna be a little late today so Wufei�s gonna watch you for a bit. (Stop rolling your eyes and groaning and pay attention! This is important!) I want you to listen to him. Seriously. Not like last time and not like I do either. Remember, while it might be fun to tease the elusive Wu-bear, it holds dominion over the fridge. And if you aggravate it enough, it WILL carry out its threat to feed you nothing but plain rice and noodles for dinner instead of the baked ziti I left. (Don�t you make that face at me, Dais! I did better this time!) And he has a thing against pocky and basically anything chocolaty. If you�re good, you might just be able to make it through the night without losing your �mindless, teeth-rotting garbage.�

I�m asking that you do your chores. Yeah I know, it�s only Monday, you just did them two days ago, and they don�t need to be done for another week. But remember that Wu�s not as tolerant of things like dirt so thick you can write your name in it and unfolded laundry sitting in baskets in the kitchen. He was raised to think that dishes should not soak overnight and that it�s no Ok to leave a mess on the floor because you forgot/had something else to do/it wasn�t a big mess anyways. He thinks that is wrong. He just might think that I�m a bad parent because I ignore the spots on the floor till Cleaning Day comes. If he believes that I�m not doing my duty as a father or �neglecting� you, he just might move in and try to take over. Again. Remember when I was sick that weekend and he alphabetized the vid collection? That�s your future if he comes over and finds a dirty house. (His definition of dirty, Van, not ours). That hell of starchy, ironed underwear and doing homework and chores before play just might be your own��

I should be home by midnight or later. Just be on your best behavior. Do your homework before you turn on the vid. No food fights at the table, I don�t care *how* aerodynamically perfect the meatball is. Take your baths without complaint. He will not understand if you ask him to sniff you to see if you can pass. Don�t spark any controversy you aren�t prepared to defend and have your ears talked of about. THAT MEANS YOU VAN. You know very well he doesn�t think much of women. Try not to take it personally or demonstrate why girls are better then boys. You will lose. Go to bed at 10, not at the usual time. You can�t wait up for me this time. He�s not as forgiving as Quatre is and besides it IS a school night. In other words, formal manners here, people. I know it sucks but you are a little Lord and Lady so you can act like it at least once in your lives. You can go back to normal tomorrow. Promise.

Any problems, email me. I�m going to leave the account open all night. All I ask is that you ID yourself before talking to me. Let �Fei know the address so he can contact me if he needs to but try not to let him rant at me. I do have work to do, ya know, and want to get home as soon as possible.

Love you lots. Duo.

*beep*

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To: Duo Maxwell <[email protected]>
From: The Maxwell Household <[email protected]>
Date: Mon 5 November AC 196 15:15:49
Type: Voice

*beep*

It�s Dais. Oji-san�s coming in a few minutes. We�ll say hi for you.

Chores are all done. We broomed the dirt down the steps. It made a really pretty brown cloud. I didn�t know dirt could fly! I learned something new today! Van stuffed clothes under your bed. The hamper was full and there�s no room under mine or hers.   But it makes it more bouncy now so that�s Ok. Started the smelly stuff on fire so the hamster smell is gone.   I know we�re not supposed to play with matches but we were REALLY careful and didn�t burn ourselves or nothin�! I think we scared Hee-chan though. She's hiding in her fluff and won�t come out. Did spot duty on the floor and it�s all clean. It�s shiny now! Van and I were skiing on it! It was so cool! You gotta try it!

We finished our homework early. Just need help on some parts. You or Oji-san can tell us. Set the table really fancy. The house looks cool. Almost like our old one �cept there�s no stuffy smell.

We promise not to pick on him. If he doesn�t start it. Oji-san can be a jerk sometimes. And we won�t prank him. We�ll be good. We don�t want you in trouble. We DON�T want him for our Dad. We love you. We want you. Come home soon. We�ll give ya lotsa hugs and stuff.

*beep*

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To: The Maxwell Household <[email protected]>
From: Duo Maxwell <[email protected]>
Date: Mon 5 November AC 196 15:30:01
Type: Voice

*beep*

��

Well, at least you were honest with me. That must count for something.

I just want you to know that was NOT what I wanted you guys to do. And you know it. I hope you�re happy. Wu�s gonna kick my butt all the way past Mars. It�s all your fault. I just hope that when they finally find my body stuffed in the back of a sushi house somewhere that you enjoy being orphans again. Or better yet, I�m changing my will to make �Fei your legal guardian. Serves you right for cutting corners at the expense of my life.

I will patiently await my verbal beating. I KNOW he�s gonna blast me as soon as he sees what kind of mess you little rugrats made. Though I may not come home tonight. I value my own hide, even though you don�t seem to.

I feel so betrayed and unloved. Duo.

*beep*

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To: Duo Maxwell <[email protected]>
From: The Maxwell Household <[email protected]>
Date: Mon 5 November AC 196 16:03:31
Type: Voice

*beep*

It can�t be THAT bad. Cheer up! Smile! We love you and I�m sure Oji-san does to. We�ll make him smile too! Then he won�t be mad at you anymore! I�m sure he doesn�t hate you; nobody does! No worries, Duo-Daddy-�Nii-chan. Kitto Ok!

PS We know you don�t like us calling you that. We do it anyway to make you yell! Just like you and Oji-san! You both look so funny when you turn pink!

Glomps and kisses. Delavan.

*beep*

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To: Duo Maxwell <[email protected]>
From: The Maxwell Household <[email protected]>
Date: Mon 5 November AC 196 17:02:13
Type: Text
Subject: Maxwell, You Slob!

MAXWELL!!!!!

What the hell kind of house are you running here?! This place is a glorified ZOO!! Have you no manners nor shame to live in a house like this?! To raise children in a house like this?! You unjust bastard, I�d throttle you if I didn�t know that meant I�d get stuck with this mess!! If the state ever saw this, you�d be in jail for neglect faster then you can say �Shinigami�!

You are a disgrace to humanity! A terrible parent! I�d list all the transgressions I�ve seen today as proof but I actually planned on doing something *worthwhile* with my life! Your children are insane demonic sadists hell-bent on totally destroying the building and me in the process! And I�ve only been here for less then an hour! INJUSTICE!!!! You�re lucky you still have these kids. They deserve better then this. I KNOW that they can behave; I�ve seen them do it. This is entirely your influence!

You, Maxwell, are going to get it for this. I promise you that. And it�s only fair to mention it might not be me that gets you. Quatre and the Magaunacs would skin you alive if they discovered the mini-lake that now resides in your kitchen. I know he�s been lenient with you thus far but really, this is too much! This was exactly one of the things that Yuy feared would happen and it has come to pass. He is not going to be happy, even less so then I am. And if he ever discovers you named your pet rat after him, let alone that it�s a vicious female, they will never find the pieces of you in a million years.

Expect to hear from my katana for this.

Shamed and appalled by this,
Chang

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To: The Maxwell Household <[email protected]>
From: Duo Maxwell <[email protected]>
Date: Mon 5 November AC 196 19:27:31
Type: Text
Subject: You Take That Back

I resent those remarks.

You have no right to say what you did. I am well aware that they are�� rambunctious. But they are children. Young children at that. If you can�t make allowances for their age, then we have nothing more to discuss, you strict jerk. Yes, they lack proper manners. Yes, they are wild and crazy. Yes, they are destructive hellions. But they�re *MY* hellions, damnit, and I won�t stand for anyone talking shit about them.

Not even you, �Fei.

And I know that I don�t deserve them. I�m confronted by that fact every morning when I realize what miracles I have under my roof. I was given a gift I�m not worthy of and I know it. Those kids are pure gold in the hands of a thief. And frankly I�m surprised I still have them, too. I expect the repo man to come and take them back any day now. Or for you to try. Not that I won�t fight you to the death, but I�m aware that our days are numbered.

I�m doing this the best I can. I�m all alone with two 6-year olds and not a fucking clue what to do most of the time. We seem to be doing Ok (or at least I think we are) but then you come along and point out all the faults. Well, guess what? We look at the strengths. So we�re messy. We work together to clean it up with no problems or complaints. So we�re too loud and obnoxious. That�s �cause we�re not afraid to laugh out loud or to speak our minds. So we�re facetious and disgraces to humanity. Screw you. We�re a family and we love each other.

If you don�t like it, don�t come back. If we shame you, never acknowledge us again. If we anger you, then avoid us. If we displease you, there�s the door and don�t let it hit you in the ass on the way out �cause it�s just been painted. Damn shame, though. We consider you family, even if you don�t. That can change if you so desire, however. You won�t have to baby-sit again or deal with us ever. Just say the word and it�s done.

In other words, apologize you dishonorable bastard. I thought your honor would have led you better then to harass little children and a single, over-worked parent. Stop picking on my kids and let me get back to work.

A disgrace to humanity, unjust bastard son of a whore and proud of it,
Duo Maxwell

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To: Duo Maxwell <[email protected]>
From: The Maxwell Household <[email protected]>
Date: Mon 5 November AC 196 20:59:22
Type: Text
Subject: Gomen Nasai

Maxwell, I��

I apologize. Apologies from the deepest and most sincere part of my soul. You are right. It was unjust of me to accuse you of such things. I did not mean to question your love and dedication to your children. Nataku knows that�s stronger and truer then anything I can hope to find anywhere else in this sorry world in my lifetime. I merely meant to critique your management skills, which even *you* admit are lacking and I am justified in discussing. My concern prompted me to speak up. But I overstepped. Instead of attacking the *problem*, I attacked the *person*. And for that, I beg your forgiveness.

I have greatly offended you and the young ones. When they discovered what I wrote, there were much tears and wailing. They are currently hiding in their rooms with the doors barricaded. They seem to fear I am taking them from you. that was never my intention! I have NO plans to separate your family! I�� I tried to explain but they merely cursed me (too fluently for 6 years-olds!) and refused to come out until �Duo-Daddy-�Nii-chan� comes home to save them.

As for your suggestion�� I consider it one of the greatest honors of my life to be a part of your family. Since my clan is gone, being �Oji-san� has given me a sense of completion I sorely missed. I do not wish to lose it. Please do not banish me from your home. I enjoy babysitting and coming over to visit. I take pleasure in your collective company. I like being Oji-san. I like that you like me enough to include me. I would like to keep it that way.

I respectfully request your advice as to what to do next. I have run out of ineffective ideas. I�m out of my league here, in more ways then one.

Apologies,
Chang

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To: Duo Maxwell <[email protected]>
From: The Maxwell Household, Remote Terminal <[email protected]>
Date: Mon 5 November AC 196 21:09:51
Type: Voice

*beep*

DUO!!!!

We�re SO sorry!! We tried not to make him mad! HONEST!!! But I think we were bad! I don�t know how and neither does Dais but why else would he be so angry at us? He was yelling and everything! We didn�t get a lot of what he was saying but he was talking about you and it didn�t sound good! We saw he was writing to you and we didn�t know all the words but some of them were mean and you�re not supposed to say them! He�s gonna make us leave! We�re hiding in our rooms but we want you to come back NOW!! Dais and I don�t want to go! Don�t let him take us away! We want to stay! We love you! Please come home! SAVE US!!!

*beep*

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To: The Maxwell Household <[email protected]>
From: Duo Maxwell <[email protected]>
Date: Mon 5 November AC 196 21:20:49
Type: Video

- Vid screen on -

[Duo appears, looking haggard and upset]

Wufei. Play this as loud as the speakers will go. I�ll wait.

[20 second pause]

Ok. Van, Dais, I want you to come out of your rooms. �Fei�s not gonna hurt or babynap you. I promise. I trust him and I want you to trust him too. He�s a good guy, really. Even if he acts like a spaz most of the time. He�s your Oji-san and you should respect him. I�ll be home in a few hours. We�ll talk tomorrow about all this and you can tell me everything but right now, I need you to listen to me. Seriously, guys, I want you to stop hiding.

[Gives a weak grin and raises his voice in an effort to be cheerful]

Cheer up! At least we know he cares about us! Otherwise, he wouldn�t be so mad. He yells because he thinks we can do way better then we are and we aren�t. And ya know what, we *can*. There�s more to life then fun and doing whatever you want. People who don�t understand that get in trouble as they get older, maybe even get hurt. That�s what he�s worried about. He believes he has to protect us, help us, and improve us because he�s a part of the family and that�s what we do for each other. He�s actually acting like a *parent*, whereas I usually act like a big brother or another kid. He�s trying to help. And I�m grateful for that effort. You should be, too.

Please come out. You made �Fei cry, too. Well, he didn�t really cry but he�s really upset and would if he didn�t think it would be a sign of weakness in this case. Try to be nice to him. Try. Please try. Come out and give him a hug. Glomp him silly. If that�s too hard, then crack open the door and just give him a smile to tell him it�s Ok. He�s afraid, too. He�s afraid he did something bad and doesn�t know how to fix it and we�ll make HIM go away forever. He doesn�t want that, he wants to stay with us. Make him feel better��

Just give me a minute to talk to him. Alright, I�m done talking to the twins; turn it down now. This is for just you and me��

[pauses and then looks solemn]

You will always be welcome in our home, Chang Wufei. Because it�s your house, too. All the pilots and allies I accumulated during the war are family. But�� you�re special, �Fei. You�re their Oji-san. Quatre may be Uncle Q and spoils them silly but you�re the one who they respect the most. Probably even more so then me. And I respect you as well. I count on you to do what you just did and let me know when I�ve made a mistake. I have no clue what to do. You are one of my guiding lights. I just wish you�d be less verbally abusive next time. Kami knows my nerves and esteem are shot and don�t need you adding more stress to the lot.

[takes a deep breath]

Oi! You wanna stay for tea? Van knows where I keep the good stuff and I�d *really* appreciate a hot cup when I get home. I got the whole variety; Quatre sent over a crate of everything in his collection as one of his house warming gifts. I�m partial to the Custom Lemon Green Tea myself but I think you�ll prefer one of the berry blends. Try the Plum and Strawberry mix. We can chat. I�ll be getting back kinda late, though. After midnight, most likely around 2 or so.

��There�s a room upstairs already for you if you wanna stay. The trek back to your place might be too long this late so you�re welcome to spend the night with us. Or you can take my room and I can sack out on the couch. That�s where I usually end up anyway. I think we need to talk�� about a lot of things.

[smiles again, this time more relaxed]

See ya later, guys.

- Vid screen off -

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To: Duo Maxwell <[email protected]>
From: The Maxwell Household, Remote Terminal <[email protected]>
Date: Mon 5 November AC 196 22:38:41
Type: Video

- Vid screen on -

[Wufei, Van and Dais appear. The kids are waving wildly and everyone is smiling. Fading tear tracks are evident on all three faces. Dais leans forward to speak]

Hi Duo! We got it all fixed! We�re better now! We�re friends, really friends now not just being nice because we had to! We know that he was being mean earlier because he wants to be like another daddy to us and he�s not sure how to do it!

[Wufei winces]

That�s not what I said, young man, and you know it.

[Van grins]

But that�s what you meant, wasn�t it? You care about us and Duo and want us to turn out Ok and protect us and make sure we�re happy and that�s what Duo wants too so you�re like our second parent!

[Wufei groans]

Fine. Whatever. You WOULD phrase things in the most unflattering way possible, just like *he* does. Another trait I must get rid of so you don�t end up making fools of yourselves. Just say goodnight and I will be in to tuck you in soon. It is way past your bedtime so don�t even THINK about arguing with me. Shoo!

[The kids chatter and blow kisses for a few minutes before leaving the screen. Wufei yells after them]

I�ll be there in a minute. Go brush your teeth and wash up! I MEAN it! I�ll check!

[Wufei turns back to the screen]

And Duo, your tea will be waiting. We do have much to talk about. The children�� Quatre and his insane need to spoil you all rotten�� future plans for the young one�s schooling and such�� our present arrangements�� what to do about Heero�� and many different things. I appreciate your offer most graciously. You have given much and expected little. Now it is my turn to make an effort. I will be here. I will wait as long as it takes. Hurry home.

[He offers a smile and a bow]

Come home, Duo Maxwell. Your family awaits you.

- Vid screen off -

~ Owari ~

So, what didja think? I know I made �Fei into a bad guy (sorta) but parenting IS a good cop/bad cop deal, after all! So, would anyone be interested in seeing what Heero has to say about all this? Or should it be Trowa�s POV next?

Lady DarkAngel
----------
�Neesan to Misuzu and A-chan
Lady Protector of POVs in Hentai Onna-Gumi
Chibi Duo's Babysitter
Moderator of Duo's Sugar Intake
Keeper of Duo's Nice Rear-end
Co-Keeper of Shinigami's Wings (with Meela)
Keeper of Heero's Homicidal Intentions
Keeper of Quatre's Teacup
Keeper of Trowa's Mask
Keeper of Wufei's Sense of Honor
Co-Keeper of Duo's Chatter (with Tomanaiya)
Co-Keeper of Heero's "Hn" (with Tomanaiya)
Co-Writer of Wufei's Rants (with Tomanaiya)
Leader of the Inspirationally-challenged Muses: Alisande, Rynvi, and Kiagara
Co-Keeper of real-life hamsters named Heero Yuy (Hee-chan) and Shinigami Eagle Vision (Shini Eagle)(with Tomanaiya)
Keeper of the Hit List
Proud Owner of two sets of chibis: Chibi Angel Duo and Heero in leather (twins of Tomanaiya's) and Chibi Angel Duo and Heero in black flight gear with stripes from the final GW episodes

Acting GOD in Charge of The Anime Muse Adoption Center and WSCT of the AMAC
Proud member of SDDI, the Society of Defending Duo's Intelligence
Member of the Society Against the Complete
Bastardization of Heero Yuy
Occupant of the Happy Hentai House
Master Hacker of the Shinigami Organization
Assistant Mob Psychologist for the Shinigami Organization
Founding Member of Saa-EEP!!!
Happy to be a member of the DuoML
Member of 1x2, 2x1 Fan Club and ML
Many more MLs but you don't want to know...

Lady DarkAngel's Gundam Wing Fanfiction Library
www.geocities.com/ladydarkangel_1/index.html