Lupinisms

Lupinisms, a brief examination of what makes Lupin so�Lupinesque, from canon to fanon and myth.

If you take away the fic writer�s personal touches to a character and confine them rigidly to the stated facts of canon, fan fiction (and fandom itself) loses more than half its fun, especially when you�re dealing with the less-than-main-characters of the story. Here�s a look at some elements of Remus Lupin fanon; some of these Lupinisms have brief (or not-so-brief) analyses following a fan fiction quote�others simply consist of a few quotes that illustrate the Lupinism.

If you have any comments, corrections, or words of glowing praise�or, if you see a quote here from a fan fiction that you have written and you want the quote removed, owl me.

For definitions of fan fiction terms, see The Fan Fiction Lexicon

Lupinfic Quote of the Month:
"Who knew the mild mannered professor had moves like that?"
-The Letter by Calliope Jones

"CHOCOLATE FROG?"

�There is something to be said for a passionate devotion to chocolate,� I murmured. I didn't think that [Remus] had heard me but he chuckled.

�There is indeed. In fact I never go anywhere without it and,� he grinned at my expression of interest, �if you get up and come with me you might be able to have some.�

-Writer's Block by Essayel

Lupin and chocolate�yes, ever since he handed out pieces of the confection to the occupants of the last compartment of the Hogwarts Express after a Dementor attack, it just seemed right that everybody�s favorite werewolf would be a chocolate lover, too. I�m pretty sure the books (canonical, that is) never state that the Professor has a particularly strong affinity for the sweet, but then again, he does seem to always have a candy bar handy, especially throughout PoA. I always thought it was just another sign of how well he knew his subject�he must have heard that Dementors were going to be the new school guards, and packed some chocolate (the standard post-Dementor attack remedy) just in case�perhaps for his own use as well as a precaution in case his students should need it. However, this one little detail seems to have firmly imbedded itself in fanon�Remus Lupin loves chocolate.

You have to admit, it is rather appealing. After all, of all the fanonic details to create for a beloved character, an appreciation of chocolate (and its restorative properties) is not only cute, it�s downright innocent. And then there are all the other Lupin addictions that have been expanded upon; tea, for example. So, he knows this neat little trick to make the water in a tea kettle boil by tapping it with his wand. Suppose this means he drinks tea often enough to be able to perform the charm with little or no effort�much like his knack for conjuring flames in his hand or producing chocolate bars out of thin air and a tight budget. What must it all mean? I think you can guess.

There�s also a Coffee Camp�plenty of Lupinfics mention his devotion to his morning cup of coffee, including my most favorite Lupinfic of all time, The Stone House Cats. And don�t forget sugar, red wine, bread (but who doesn�t love bread?)�all sometimes listed among the lycanthrope�s favorite food and drink, with or without canonical evidence to support it. Then again, you�ve got to keep your options open for those times when you just get hungry like the wolf.

�Remember, Poppy, that boy will eat anything chocolate, anytime, anywhere!�

-A Most Unusual Student by Alkari

�Judging by the amount of chocolate, it is pretty serious, and I think Soma would know,� Hermione concluded.

-The Stone House Cats by Marstri

�OH, BUGGER!�
-Small Snippets From Lupin's Daily Life by Lady Twatterby

He tapped his mug with his fingertips. �Writer's block is a bitch.�

I was mildly surprised hearing Lupin swear. He was meant to be the role model your parents approved of. Apparently he was badass at times. If using the word "bitch" could be considered "badass".

-Quills and Paintbrushes by Madame Wolf

Lupin�swearing? Usually, writers use it as comic relief, to show how urgent a situation is�it�s so bad, even Lupin slips a naughty word. As Lily seriously proclaims in Did You Say Kids? by Belphegor, �Remus is a gentleman�. As we all know, a gentleman doesn�t swear, unless the circumstances are so dire they make him temporarily forget his manners.

"Come on, I thought you fancied him."

"I did," said Fleur, turning her left big toenail mauve. "But I have since reconsidered. 'E is very 'andsome, but just a bit too stodgy."

Draco bit his lip in frustration. "Fleur, the man's a werewolf. How stodgy can he be?"

'''E is boring," said Fleur, firmly. "'E is boring and stuffy and English. Not like you," she added quickly. "You are English boy with French instincts," she grinned. "And veela blood. You are not boring. But Lupin, he fills me with ennui."

"That's just his teaching persona," Draco said, hoping he sounded like he knew what he was talking about. "Stodgy by day, perhaps, but at night it's booze, whores and flying fur."

Fleur wrinkled up her petite nose in a frown. "I do not believe you," she said.

-Draco Sinister by Cassandra Claire

"Let's see some magic then," she said. He shrugged and drained his glass.

"Shazam. My drink's gone."

-Fireworks by Sam

A TASTE FOR HUMAN FLESH

He left, slamming the door and caring little whom he woke. Then he went to see the Headmaster, pounding rudely on his door and pushing it open without being invited.

"What is it?" inquired Professor Bumblesnore. He was trying to balance an eel on his nose.

"I'm resigning," Remus snapped.

Bumblesnore dropped the eel and sat up straight, stammering a bit. "You, Lupin, resigning? And may I ask why? You never -- "

Remus got control of his temper, though he couldn't stop a wry smile from tugging the corner of his mouth. "Well, you see, it's like this -- I'm a werewolf. And I feel an urge to move to Romania and eat people right now." Tossing a piece of parchment -- his resignation letter -- on the desk, Remus stormed out of the office and took off into the air.

Childish, perhaps. It was something Sirius would do.

But now he had to be Sirius for both of them.

-Call of the Wild by Wolfie Twins

"I look dreadful, do I?" He grinned. "Come to think of it, I'm pretty hungry, too. Guess that means I didn't eat anyone last night." I must have made a face, because he instantly said, "I'm sorry. That wasn't funny at all."

"It was rather tasteless."

-By The Numbers by Wolfcat

"Yes, well, the raging beast and I thank you for your show of support."

-Raison d�etre by Aelge

HE�S NOT THAT OLD!

"It is NOT fine," said Ron, his disembodied voice sounding cranky.

"Why not?"

"Because he's really, really old and it's nasty," said Ron, firmly.

"He�s not that old," said Ginny.

The cloak rustled as Harry, Ron and Draco tried to turn to look at Ginny, before realizing this was impossible. Harry was fairly sure, however, from the tone of her voice, that she was smiling.

"He�s not," she insisted.

"Ginny," said Ron warningly.

"He�s kind of attractive, actually," she said.

"Can we go back to talking about Dementors in the front yard?" said Ron. "Because this is freaking me out."

-Draco Sinister by Cassandra Claire

He looked ill and exhausted. Though quite young, his light brown hair was flecked with gray.
�
A ray of wintery sunlight fell across the classroom, illuminating Lupin�s gray hairs and the lines on his young face.

-Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban by J. K. Rowling

SNOGGING THE DADA PROF.

I guess it�s inevitable that most �young ladies� who read and have imaginations will, at some point or another, develop a crush on one of their teachers�

-Strange Condition by Lady Atropos

"�As anyone ever told you that you are a very good teacher?" asked Fleur, using her grip on Lupin�s arm to steer him down the corridor.

"Oh, yes, I get told that all the time," he said, as he unknowingly passed Ron, Draco, Harry and Ginny in the hall.

"�As anyone ever told you that you are also very attractive?"

"Well, Dumbledore told me that once, but it was after the New Year's staff party and he was a bit squiffy on butterbeer..."

-Draco Sinister by Cassandra Claire

"Wonderful! You�ve just managed to snog your DADA professor!"

-Before the Moon Rises by Penelope78

A quick glance at the mirror reassured me that I was still very ordinary-looking. How had I become so popular with the twelve-to-sixteen-year-old set? What did they see in a shabbily dressed, prematurely greying Defence Against the Dark Arts professor? And sweet Merlin, why couldn't this have happened to me twenty years ago?

-My Teenage Fan Club by After the Rain

MOONS, TIDES, AND PFMS

"It has nothing to do with the moon," the slender one said mildly. "I'm just hungry."

"Nothing to do with it?" The black-haired one sounded incredulous. "Do you mean to tell me you've never noticed?"

"Noticed what?"

"That you only crave Chinese at first quarter!"

"Nonsense. You're imagining things."

"And sushi at the new moon, and curry just after full--"

-First Quarter by Canis M.

�I should have warned you; I can get a little moody around this time of the month.�

-By The Numbers by Wolfcat

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