WOW! It's been a long time since I wrote anything here. hehe. A lot of things have changed since the last time. On September 15 2001 (technically it was the 16th cause it was after midnight but who's counting) I met a man that has ended all of my questions about what love really is. Like in one of my other thoughts I said about what my one friend said love should be like. And, OH MY GOD, it is. I do feel more "alive" when I'm with him. His name is Chris. At first he both delighted and scared the SHIT out of me. The more time I spent with him the more I wanted to be with him. But I was finding myself having feelings about him that scared me. I didn't want to be hurt again. I didn't want to fall in love with him and him not love me back. But he made me feel SO good. I would smile just thinking about him. I couldn't sleep at night thinking about him (well that still happens). I was even driving the women I work with NUTS by talking about him all night (that still happens too). And if he came to see me at work, I'd be on cloud 9 all night. I can't help it. He treats me better than anyone I've ever been with. And there's more too. I've always been with men that need "help". They have money problems, they don't have a home (my husband), or something else. My friend Nikki calls them my "charade" cases. Well, ok, maybe she's right. But this time I don't have too. There isn't anything wrong with Chris. He has a good job, his own money, takes care of himself, has a place to live, and all he wants from me is ME! YAY!!! He's a sweetheart too. He says things to me that just plane make me feel wonderful. I don't have to act like someone else. I don't have to watch what I say. I can just be myself. The only thing I would like to have is more time with him. It's hard with me working nights and him working days. But we get together when we can. I don't think any amount of time would be enough with him. He's just so wonderful.