Disclaimers: Characters are property of Lucasfilm.  Yadda, yadda, yadda
Song is by Gwendolyn Fayrfax and Mikal the Ram
Recorded by Mikal the Ram on _Njord's Song_
(If you want the tape, e-mail me and I'll give
you Mikal's e-mail)
 

*****
Where Go the Maids
c 2000 Angelia Sparrow
*****
 
 

Where go the maids on a summer's day
when the Falcon bears their mates away?
Sing willow-a-willow-a-way-hey-hey
Sing Willow-a-willow-a-way.

The landing pad was blessedly empty of dignitaries, droids
and assorted on-hangers as the Heroes of the Republic kissed their
wives goodbye at the foot of the Millennium Falcon's
ramp.  The scouting mission would take about a week, and
they were eager to be off so they could hurry home.

Leia and Mara watched the lift-off, and waved until their men
were out of the atmosphere.  Then, an evil grin crossed
Mara's face, mirrored by the one on Leia's.

A quick change at the Skywalker apartment, and
they were off.

After the jump to lightspeed:
"Well, we're away.  Now what?"

"After all these missions, you gotta ask?  Set the autopilot,
n'come here."
 

Off to the hall to step a dance
While their good lovers break a lance.

"So, where to tonight, sis?"

"Mmmm, good question.  There's a Rhythm group
at Cclasti or Jizz Wailers at Lovrall's.  What do you want?"

"To dance with handsome young snub pilots, and forget
I'm an old married lady."

"Cclasti it is."

Aboard the Falcon:

The rough and tumble sparring of a good workout
had left Luke and Han both sweaty and tired.
After finishing the wrestling match,
they retired to the sonic shower.
 

And trade they kisses with young beaus
While their dear husbands trade at blows.

Cclasti was a cross-section of Coruscant's population, but very
popular with the younger pilots, the ones who were still
in The Show and not running transports.  A group of them had dragged
their commander, Wedge Antilles, out for an evening on the town.

Surely that wasn't the Princess out on the floor with Mara Jade, he blinked.
His eyes did not deceive him.  Since neither was wearing anything
easily recognizable, he assumed they wanted privacy.  Luke would
appreciate it if he kept an eye on the ladies.  Boy, they both had the moves.
Finally, he got up and nudged a couple of guys that were dancing too closely
aside, and joined them, making a circle of their pair.

A couple hours later, more than half in the bottle, Mara was armwrestling
pilots.  If she won, they had to buy the next round.  If they won, she kissed them.
So far, the score was pretty even.  Leia, on the other hand, was stone-cold
sober.  Amused by her sister-in-law's behavior, she decided to go her
one better.  Wedge found himself under the table, kissing parts
of the princess he'd never seen: ankles, knees, thighs.  After
a few moments, Leia was very grateful the Alderaanian alphabet had so
many looped letter shapes...

Aboard the Falcon:

"What _were_ you thinking, kid?"

"I dunno.  Seemed like a good idea at the time.  How was I to know
that position was so awkward?"

"The next time, we take turns instead of goin' 69."
 
 

And drink they mead where it is kept
While their good lovers drink their sweat.

"I don't believe you!"

"I don't believe you either, sis."

"Since neither of us is believing the other, shall we have
a nice hot bath and then to bed?"

"Does bed come with perks?"

"Mmmmaybe..."

"Mmmm, do all princesses taste this good?  Or is it a family thing?"

Aboard the Falcon:

Amid the light snores from the master of the ship, Luke prowled
the cabin.  Restless, tired, yet unable to sleep, he climbed
back into the bunk and curled into Han's back.

He buried his face against the spine in front of him, and
caught a forgotten bead of sweat with his tongue.  The
salt taste washed through him fanning the coals of desire.

The licks became longer, working their way both up and
down until the snores stopped and a mildly grouchy voice
said "Make up your mind."

He made it up and licked his way over the neck to kiss
his lover.

And when the Falcon comes to nest
Then welcome they their men to rest.

For lords may ken to the battle run
But a lady too will have her fun.
Sing willow-a-willow-a-way-hey-hey
Sing Willow-a-willow-a-way.

"They'll be home today.  I wonder how the survey went."

Leia and Mara dressed for the homecoming, attempting to hide
the fact that they hadn't accomplished much of anything while
their husbands were gone.

"Who cares?  Can we conjure up another mission for them
next month?"

"I think I can arrange that."  Leia smiled the evil smile that only Mara
ever saw.  Then she noticed something.  "Quick, the tag on the
flowers."  She discarded the card that glowed with Wedge's endless
devotion to her, with one she had written to entice her husband.  After placing
it in the midst of the fire-orchids, she and Mara left for the
landing pad.

As they set the Falcon down on the pad, Luke turned and said "Do you think
they'll suspect anything?"

"Nah, they still haven't figured out how little work we actually do
on these trips.  Wanna see if we can come up with another soon?"

The ramp went down, and the men decended to greet their wives.

*end*