Date: Wednesday 3 - October 2001
Location: Clark's Apartment, Metropolis
Dear Diary,
Mi
ca bel semon Kyle zu Lisifa. Mi dhad
gralan waja zu dha, hen mi janer met bedafet jaqus te... Di kala bon LATAD ainad sat mi!
|||Language:
Argonian/Kryptonian inter-hybred language|||
/\/\Breaking Down/\/\
Mi
ca bel semon Kyle zu Lisifa. Mi dhad
gralan waja zu dha, hen mi janer met bedafet jaqus te... Di kala bon LATAD ainad sat mi!
/\/\Auto Translater Activated/\/\
I
am so afraid to love Kyle. I don't know
what to do, but I think we should break up...
He nearly got KILLED because of me!!
||||||||||||
Waja fredra dal di lata--
/\/\/\/\/\/\
Waja
fredra dal di lata--
/\/\Continue Automatic Translation/\/\
What
happens if he dies for ME? I can't
allow that... And what if he dies while
he's out there... and I can't protect
him and I should have because I am willing of mind, body and spirit? I want... to be with him, I want to be
able... well... to have what Barbara and Wally have. God, Wally... is ALWAYS there for her, and I'm *so* happy for
that. For them. I just wish Kyle was around more. But... I guess I can't understand, that I'm
too young. Everyone says Kyle loves me,
and HE says he loves me... But is he
meaning it? Or is he... just lying to
make me feel better or what?
DAMN
Automatic translation!
I
hope no one gets a hold of this... anyway... Bruce asked if I'd go to the Lion King
Broadway play on Saturday... Isn't
that... AWESOME? He's practically the
only one who does anything with me that I really wanna do. I mean, I like shopping, and I like all
that... I don't like going to church and I don't like going to
Smallville... But I *do* like raves
like the Gatecrasher, and I love going to operas and theme parks and plays and
ballets... Would you believe Bruce is
the ONLY person who goes to those with me?
Diary, he's so totally a father figure or a brother figure to me. He's awesome, I don't care what anyone else
says.
I
just wish Kyle had time to do those things with me too. I have passes to the stage of the next
Gatecrasher in Sydney Australia, but that's... heh... tonight, and Kyle's off
running around the galaxy with some guy named GUY. Heh. Oh well, maybe
Dick'll come with me, he's the rebellious type... (Sorry, Kyle, but he IS sexy
too.)
Would
you believe I don’t even feel RIGHT talking to either of them, Barbara or Kyle? I thought I could once upon a time, but I
was wrong…
“There’s nothing else I
wanna do,
I spend all day dreaming
of you…
I haven’t seen you for a
while.
I need you’re kiss, I
miss your smile.
All the things I liked
you for,
makes me want you more
and more…
I don’t know what to
say,
I’ve got to get to you
today.”
Aren’t
those GORGEOUS lyrics, in some modern-like way? That’s “Just A Dream”.
Then there’s “Snow on the Sahara” (Barb likes this song too!).
“But to stand with you
in the ring of fire,
I’ll forget the days
gone by…
I’ll protect your body
and guard your soul…”
Just
those three lines… God, these songs are beautiful…
“I don’t need you here
by my side…
And when I feel your
love deep inside,
I will forget…
So don’t you dare come
knockin’ on my door
When you need someone to
hold…
‘cause every door and
window is closed,
I can live… Live without
your love.”
It was while listening to THOSE lyrics that I decided… Maybe it’s just better for Kyle and I to cut it off…
You know, there’s different kinds of love… There’s… “love” and being “in love”. Example: I love Barbara and I believe I may be IN love with Kyle. Barbara is my best friend and practically my sister. Kyle is my boyfriend and… my… boyfriend… Is there even a friendship there? Maybe it was just a mistake… I mean, HOW much trouble has this been? Clark threatened and scared the living hell out of Barbara because she lied to him for me, Bruce and Clark have Kyle on a leash because of me, Kyle nearly got killed because of me, people are all saying that if Kyle hurts me they’re gonna hurt him. But why? I’m a big girl, I can handle this myself…
I just don’t think I’m big enough to be in the league of relationships that I’m in with Kyle. That man has MAJOR experience, ya know? I mean, the things Donna told me about… WOW. I’m not exactly an amateur in this field, but I’ve got the knowledge that a typical eighteen year old would have. Not what he would have. Not at his age.
You know what diary?
/\/\Glitch in
method::Repairing/\/\
Mi ca dard zu dha
la.
/\/\Utilizing translator: Coping sentence over./\/\
Mi ca dard zu dha la.
/\/\Translator: Repaired. Sentence copied./\/\
I’m going to do it. I’m going to cut it off. When he gets back I’m… just gonna… say that maybe it’s better that we DON’T… It’s totally me, diary, and I’m gonna tell him that. I’m going to tell him that I don’t want him dying for the cost of ME. That’s totally what this is about. It’s like… I think Jade… Jen… whatever her name is… they spend more time together then Kyle and I, so… yeah, maybe he’d be happier with her…
I’m going to discuss it with Barbara, but I honestly don’t think anything is going to change my mind. This might hurt him, but it’s going to KILL me… In time, however, he’ll move on. I’m certain… Part of me says I shouldn’t do this, and maybe I won’t--but I *will* bring it up…
/\/\Changing font and color, entry entered later/\/\
So I was talking to Dick just a bit ago (the phone rang, hence
why I cut off). Apparently something
happened that BARBARA didn’t tell me about.
I guess he had been possessed by a demon (oh boy, when I read this
later, this is going to sound weird) named… J…J… Ju-Ja-Jo… SOME thing, can’t
remember. I was wondering why I
couldn’t get ahold of Babs, I just figured she was at work… Come to find out,
he STABBED her. Several times, and
nearly killed her! Flash beat the hell
out of him. I was so stunned as he told
me this, because no one bothered to tell me!
I mean, I know something happened between Dick and Barbara that was
negative… But this is ridiculous! It wasn’t Dick’s fault, I really, honest to
God, don’t blame him. But you know
what? Make it a to-do list.
q Talk to Barbara about Kyle.
q Talk to Barbara about Grayson.
Sound good, diary? I’ll tell you how thinks turned out,
okay? Promise.
Love,
Kara
NOTE TO SELF: kick the computer’s ass for automatically translating all this
into English, damn it.