Not sleeping well - still.

Work is busy busy busy. I still can NOT believe that I will be leaving on Monday to be going to Italy and France! This is too weird.

Had a moment this morning where I was thinking about friendship. I don't make friends real easy. I'm friendly enough and when I'm with people, people seem to like me...we have a good time. We laugh...get along. It's like we're "In the moment friends." But it seems like as soon as I leave the room, I'm forgotten. I sometimes wonder if people think that I must have so many friends that I don't need any more...Or do they even think of me at all.

When I'm pity partying...they don't think of me at all.  But is it possible that people just don't realize? I don't have any friends that call me. Pathetic, huh? Once in a great while Mary calls me. She's about the only one. Do people just not care? Am I just not close enough to these friends that they don't care enough to want to do stuff together? Or do they think I'm busy with other stuff? Other people?

I get tired of always being the one who calls to make plans. To call to talk. Is it too much to ask to have a friend who loves me enough to want to call me? Who wants to do stuff with me? Who wants me to come over? Who wants to come over to my house? How do you find a friend like this?