In all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will direct and make straight and plain your paths

Proverbs 3.6

My life was filled with anxiety and worry. I didn’t seem to have the strength, physically or emotionally, to go on.

I had become agoraphobic, which is a dread of open spaces, a fear of going out. It was so intense that at times I would panic and go into a sweat. Sometimes I would interrupt my grocery shopping and run home. As soon as I was in the house, I would feel safe and secure again.

I thought I was the only person who felt like this. My eating habits changed, my sleep was erratic, I was trembly and shaky, and I was generally anxious about life and all its responsibilities. I couldn’t face anything, I felt I was all washed up by the time I was in my early thirties.

As I look back, I realize that there were three reasons for my anxiety. One was extreme immaturity: I couldn’t handle responsibility. Second, I had developed a bitterness habit, though I didn’t recognize it as such because I felt I was always justified in feeling as I did. And the third reason, which I think is common to all of us, was a tendency to be self-sufficient. I tried to do everything in my own strength.

Those three factors had a crumbling effect. It led toward the breakdown of my self-sufficiency.

As God worked in my life and led me toward wholeness, He showed me four disciplines that continue to have a profound effect in my life: reading, praying, trusting, and obeying. Reading the Bible _feasting on His truths. Praying _talking with Him not only in my own little time of prayer, but throughout the day and in every situation. Trusting _ relying on God in the circumstances that are beyond my control. Obeying _doing what I know God wants me to do.

While these four disciplines are very familiar, and even though the principle of dependence on God is an obvious truth scripturally, we often fail to put them into practice.

As I began to incorporate these disciplines into my daily living, I found that it cultivated an intimate relationship with Christ that developed confidence in Him. He began to prove His sufficiency to me in small ways at first. And as He showed me His faithfulness, I began to trust Him more and more.

As I did, reading, praying, trusting, and obeying interacted with one another. When I did what I was supposed to do, God began to do the things that only He could do. So I began to find less and less reason for worry. I began to realize that whatever He led me to undertake, even if it were something that stretched me, He would come through for me.

Dependence on God is the theme of my life. My story is about a woman who had nothing in herself, but found everything she needed through a life of total dependence on the Lord. It’s not a sad state of affairs to have to depend on God _it’s God’s perfect design.

The beginning of progress in my spiritual life was a rock-bottom experience. I didn’t look good. I didn’t feel good. But it was the most spiritual moment in my life. I hope this is an encouragement to others who are at that point. So often we think that to be spiritual we must always be on top. That’s not true. To be spiritual is to come to the place where there’s nothing of us, and all is of God. _Unquote (by) Joanie E. Yoder’s story taken from “Our Daily Bread Sept-Oct-Nov. 2001 issue

Without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him (Hebr. 11.6). Believing who God is , what He says and what He does is the pass key into the Kingdom of God.

From: Victory Over Darkness, (Realizing the Power of Your Identity In Christ) by Neil T. ANDERSON, Tunbridge Wells/Cape Town, Monarch/Struik Christian Books (1990) ISBN 1 85424 183 4 / ISBN 1 86823 139 9