But, oh, Fate! The time to see him came before she expected. The next morning, while the two girls were in their room talking gaily they heard a horse at the door and looking through the window they saw Ludwig's handsome figure.

"Oh, it's Herr Reiss!" Johanna cried.

Isabella was speechless. She was stifled by a great emotion. This was too good to be true. Her waiting and longing was finally over! Her beloved was at her front door waiting for her love declaration.

Both girls darted to the mirror and prepared their looks to receive the visitor. Isabella was trembling with excitement. First she had to plan the proper way to tell him. She heard the maid receiving him and then her father's voice greeting him. They would be called any minute. She could hardly wait to see his wonderful gray eyes again. She had to prepare her plan very carefully. She couldn't tell him until they were alone, and it wouldn't be hard to get rid of the others. He would surely try to have her tête-à-tête too.

But she still wasn't sure if it would be better to make the first move and tell him straight out or wait until he asked again. She wasn't sure if it was better to tell him right away or let him beg a little first. Maybe it was better to tempt him to ask and then tell him. She was a master when it came to send eye messages.

She was so excited! She dreamed endlessly of that magical moment when Ludwig was to hold her in his arms and ask her "Do you love me?" And she would say "Yes" and he would beam with joy and happiness and kiss her... and ask for her hand... and it was all so perfect that she could hardly believe it! She felt so good by her reverie that she started to sing to herself.

Johanna gave her a weird look. Isabella did not pay any attention to her. She could only think of Ludwig's face when she said the magic words. Herr Streicher knocked the door and came in with a huge smile in his aged face and his dark eyes shining with joy and pride. He announced with deep solemnity: "Herr Reiss is here, ladies."

"We'll be right down, father." Isabella said with the happiest voice she'd ever had.

"Do hurry, girls. There's good news today" he continued. Isabella could feel the next wonderful words coming up "He has come to deliver his proposal"

"Marriage?" Johanna opened her large eyes "Really?"

"And who is it?" asked Isabella trying to stay as calm as she could.

"It's Johanna"

"My Goodness!" Johanna blushed and hid her face in her hands; this was the first proposal she had in her life. Her eyes shone with tears "Did you hear that, Isabella? Isn't it wonderful?"

Isabella remained frozen, motionless, breathless. She couldn't believe what she had just heard. Johanna! No, it had to be some mistake. Not Johanna! It was impossible. Suddenly the day seemed to turn gray and her emotions vanished in the blur of a cascade of tears she kept from falling. She was even to weak to smile or look at her excited cousin.

"I can't believe it! He wants to marry me!" Johanna was so happy that Isabella felt the terrible urge of killing her. Her hand was near the metal bar. She looked at it sharply and suddenly saw herself rushing at Johanna and plunging its sharp edge into her breast. Then she saw her own hand hitting her little cousin's head with the heavy iron, burning her pale face with that lethal weapon she used so innocently to do her hair and then pushing her over the balcony and laughing at her fragile body that had turned into a shapeless mass on the stone street.

But this moment of delirium didn't last too much. When the two girls went down the stairs and she saw Ludwig's face beaming at Johanna she woke up from her illusions and saw the cruel icy reality: Johanna was alive and Ludwig was her beau. She had lost him forever.

Ludwig gently held Johanna's little white hand. Herr Streicher spoke solemnly: "Johanna, dear, Herr Reiss has asked to seek your hand in marriage. I had answered that it will make me glad and proud to give my niece, whom I love like my own daughter, to such a fine gentleman and friend of my house. Now it's up to you to say if you accept him."

"Herr Reiss," Johanna said shyly "I don't deserve the honor of considering myself worthy of your love, but I will try to make you happy."

Ludwig kissed her hand "I do not deserve you and I'm honored that you accept my humble love."

During this tender scene Isabella stayed at the bottom of the stairs, looking at the lovely couple, trying to find in Ludwig's face some sign that could convince her that he still loved her, but he didn't even look at her. He only had eyes for Johanna, and each word he said to her was like a knife that plunged into Isabella's ears. The bright of happiness in Johanna's eyes, brought tears to her own and she had to look at the floor all the time to hide them.

"Let's celebrate this happy moment!" Herr Streicher sent the servant to get the best bottle of wine of the house. Rutger and Herr Streicher congratulated Johanna and Ludwig profusely and when Isabella had to embrace Johanna she felt for the first time how hot her jealousy was. If they had been alone she could have killed her with her own hands.

However, her child-like stubbornness had faded away a little. Enough to admit that all what was happening was her very own fault. She went to shake Ludwig's hand and eagerly sought in his face any sign of love; any sing that could make her believe that this wasn't over yet and she still could have the hope that all this could be taken back. But his eyes were cold and passionless. Last night they had burned her body with the ardent look of love, now they remained cold and gray like a winter sky... It was all over.

Isabella couldn't understand how such love can vanish from night to morning, but she wished she could do the same with hers which now felt so heavy upon her heart. Not resisting Johanna's smile anymore, she slid out to dry her tears. She stood in the kitchen for a long time until she realized the night was falling. She dared not go back to the living room for she knew there was more excitement there than she could resist. Her feet automatically took her to the garden to her favorite bench.

But as she reached the crystal door that led to the garden her heart stopped beating and she froze in front of the glass, her eyes wide open staring at her bench. There was Johanna. And with her was Ludwig. She did not hear a word they said, but she knew they were engaged in a very tender tête-à-tête. He came closer to her and put one arm around her waist. In the darkness Isabella saw him leaning toward her.

Her jealousy grew infernal. That kiss belonged to her. If she hadn't been so stubborn and stupid last night she would be the one sitting on that bench now! The long repressed tears in her eyes finally puored over her pale cheeks. She bit her lips trying not to scream and walked away to get that horrid sight away from her.

Like the moon, she thought being poetic for the first time in her life. I'm like the moon: I'm so lofty that no man can reach me, and I'm doomed to stay away from love and only witness the happiness of others.

She cried herself the whole night and when the dawn approached she was feeling a little better. At least better enough to think. She wasn't going to give up so easily. She wanted Ludwig more badly than anything in the world. There had to be a way...

She silently sneaked out of her room and slid to the kitchen. She hadn't been able to have one bite the whole day and now that her emotions had cooled down a little she noticed that her stomach was growling. While the first golden lights of dawn appeared Isabella walked around the kitchen, fiddling with her gown ties, biting a piece of bred and thinking desperately.

How could Ludwig do this to her? How could he brake her heart like this? Why? There had to be a way to get him back... Suddenly a lightening crossed her mind. Why had Ludwig done that? Because she rejected him! He was marrying her cousin because he though he didn't have any chance with her! She had denied everything, she had put him down, she had been a fool!

And there was still time to tell him. She could fix it. She just had to tell him; that was all. They could run away and get married before anyone knew. There was still time. For a moment she reviewed all the possibilities. It was too risky to wait until he came again and try to get a minute alone with him. It would be impossible to get him away from Johanna or her father: now they were too kind to him. Besides he could spend a good time without showing up. If she didn't get it before the word spread out it would be very difficult: if the whole town talked about the wedding he would have to marry Johanna to save her reputation. He couldn't let her down after the entire Vienna knew him as her fiancé.

No, she couldn't wait for him. She looked for another way out. It would be too much to expect to meet him along the street by accident. Any way, her maid followed her everywhere she went and she couldn't get a word with him. Going to visit him was unacceptable. Besides her maid would go there too, and, in the house of a man and going alone it was for sure that her maid wouldn't take her eyes off her for a second.

Unless she sneaked out and went to see him, so she wouldn't have to take her. She could go that very minute, before anyone woke up. She could just get dressed up and go unseen... only that this was far too unproper... She was about to forget about all those stupid social rules and run to see Ludwig when she realized she didn't know where he lived.

There was no party coming soon so she had no chance to see him. Her last hope was to pray to Heaven to make him go to her house soon. And wait. She thought of making Johanna or her father invite him to dinner, but that would make it impossible to be alone with him. She kicked the floor in a rage. For the first time she didn't have a plan!

Isabella had to swallow her rage the entire day while listening to the excited Johanna talking about the wedding for hours and seeing her selecting her dress. She felt a bit uneasy noticing that there was too much agitation in the house for being only the day after the proposal. She soon learned why. Apparently Ludwig wanted the wedding as soon as possible because he was leaving to Germany and was taking Johanna with him.

Isabella thought that she could never hear worse news than that, but was wrong. The blow she received during dinner knocked her out: Ludwig was out of town. And he was to go back within two weeks, the very day he was to take Johanna with him. Johanna and Herr Streicher were going with him for the wedding in Germany. They weren't taking Isabella because they knew she hated Hamburg.

The entire sky tumbled and fell over poor Isabellaer " Strei. She could never have a word with him again. It was hopeless. Ludwig had slipped through her hands and all because she had been too proud.

She laid awake in her bed for many nights crying and thinking over and over of Ludwig's insistent questions "Do you love me?" If she had the chance again she wouldn't let it go. If she could take her words back she would do anything. If she could reichhave him now in front of her now she wouldn't try to pretend for one second. She tortured herself thinking that he was going away from her forever... and worse yet, he was going brokenhearted thinking that she hated him!

Her depression grew as much as Johanna's happiness. Isabella had to stand endless hours talking to her about the wedding. She helped her chose her dress, her hair do, she helped her pack her things. She listened to her endless talk about wonderful Ludwig, handsome Ludwig, sweet Ludwig and all the violin-player children they were going to have.

Isabella manifested cheerful and joyous and for the first time she regretted that Johanna was such a good friend to her. If it had been someone else, she could hate her, envy her, wish her to die, but being her own dear cousin those selfish thoughts (that swept her mind all the time) made her feel guilty. Mostly when she recognized that she was guilty for making all this happen. She constantly blamed herself for letting Ludwig go.

She did her best to carry on those horrible two weeks. The longest of her life. Though Isabella never resigned herself. Even when it seemed to be a lost cause she still held some hope. Ludwig was to come. She could see him just for one second but she had to talk to him. She just had to tell him. They could still run away. It could still be herself who was to join him to Germany instead of Johanna. She didn't care what people said... or what Johanna said. Her conscience tormented her a bit for doing this to her cousin, but she was determined.

When she saw Ludwig at the front door she quickly ran downstairs. She had to be around him all the time. Some time Herr Streicher and Johanna had to leave him alone for at least a minute and she would have the chance to talk to him. She didn't want to miss this chance and she knew she was running out of time.

She was sure to make it. All she had to do was say the magic words and Ludwig would forget about Johanna and marry her. And this time she would say it. No more hesitations.

When she saw him coming in her heart jumped. It was like the first time she realized how handsome he was. She pictured herself walking out of the church in a white dress and holding his arm.

She patiently waited while her father and Ludwig talked in the living room. Then, a servant started placing all the trunks in the cab. She had to get her father away or she would miss the chance to have a word with him.

After saying good bye to Johanna and see her go in the cab she got despaired. She managed to convince Herr Streicher of going upstairs to get the ebony box she owned to give it to Johanna as wedding gift. The minute he went out of the scene she addressed to Ludwig sharply:

"What are you up to?" She asked.

Ludwig, who was already crossing the threshold turned to her, surprised at such direct question. "What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean. You're marrying Johanna! Why?"

"She is a lovely, beautiful, sweet creature and will make a wonderful wife."

"Oh, cut the comedy!" She cried, exasperated hearing his calm tone. "You know what I mean: you don't love her!"

"Who says I don't?"

"You! You said you loved me!"

"Yes, I said that" his face turned dark and his eyes bought a bitter glim " but that chapter is over."

"How can you say that?"

"As you said, miss, let's cut the comedy. I know you, Isabella. I've seen you doing this at hundreds of parties. Oh, yes, don't stare at me like that; I did examine you many times when you thought I didn't even notice your presence. Whenever you see one of your suitors giving attention to some other girl, you go to chase him and get him back. It won't work with me. I belong to Johanna and she is the only one. Don't humble yourself in vain."

"But..."

"And don't toy with my feelings." He said sharply with a tone of annoyance "You don't need to remind me I once loved you just to treat your ego. We both know what happened. You pierced my heart and laughed in my face already, now let me at least retain some pride as I leave you house. If you can't act like a human, at least be a lady." She sensed a deep reproach tone in his voice and burning tears began to fill her eyes.

"But you don't love Johanna!" She insisted.

"Oh, yes, I do."

"You lie! I saw your face when you're together! When you looked at me the other night I..."

"Love has many faces. I look on her different but not with less love. And love has many ways too. What I feel for Johanna is tenderness, what I felt for you was passion. Both are true love. And no one is stronger or deeper that the other. Both can make a wonderful marriage."

"Why do you keep talking in past tense? 'What you felt for me'?"

"That's past tense, my dear. It's over."

"Love can't end just like that!"

"How could you possibly know? Have you ever loved somebody? Are you even capable of love?"

"Of course I can love! I love you!" She was astonished. She had finally said it. And it had been a lot easier than she thought. She raised her proud eyes to him expecting to see his face beaming with love and joy, but he remained icy.

"Good to you. You finally said it." He said carelessly and grabbed his hat. "I do hope it will not take so long next time. Not all men are as patient as I am."

"What do you mean 'next time'? There won't be a next time! I love you!"

"Too bad then... I'm sorry. It's too late for that confession. If you had agreed to say it that night when we were on the bench it would have made a whole different story."

"I remember that night. You said you loved me more than anything!"

"I'm not sure those were my exact words, but whatever I said to you I really meant it. Then... But, dear, all the flames go down if you pour water on them. And Johanna has made my love grow with hers. You just killed it with your iciness. I won't let you walk over my heart again. I'd rather give it to someone who wants it."

"Ludwig..." she began with trembling voice, unable to hold her tears in any longer without noticing in her dispair that she called him by his name, "I need you... You can't do this to me."

"Isabella, dear," said he, addressing her in the same familiar term "You want me because I seem so hard to get. I, for you, am nothing but a caprice. I tried to spring your interest being hard to get and it worked. I see now that I sprang your interest but not your love. You see me as a prize to prove yourself that you can get anyone and no man is free from your evil spell. I excited you because I was harder than the others: a challenge. I excited you because I dared more than the others: something new. But the minute I'm yours you'll forget about me and it's not worthy wasting my life trying to make you happy when I know I can't. I thought I could earn your love, but you're much too proud to love anyone."

"Don't you hear what I'm telling you? I love you!" She cried passionately, clasping her hands.

"Don't you hear what I'm telling you? You're such a child!" he said very calmly "You don't even know what love is!"

She couldn't believe her ears. It wasn't at all like she had pictured it. Before she could think of something clever to answer he had crossed the porch with his elegant walk and his athletic body jumped to the cab's sit beside Johanna. Isabella stood at the steps of the front door feeling a deep black emptiness inside of her while she saw the cab getting far away along the dusty road. And Ludwig's figure slowly disappeared from her sight... and life.

THE END