Darya Bulkh Valley Detention Camp
Afghanistan
May 14, 2002 23:05 Local

"Ma’am, it’s good to see you again."

Mac’s smile was genuine while stepping closer to embrace her fellow Marine. "Good to see you again too, Gunny. I was wondering if you were still around. How have you been?"

"It’s been rough the last couple of weeks, Ma’am. I’m glad you and the Commander made it okay. We can use all the help around here we can get," Gunny spoke with sincerity.

"Don’t know how much help we’ll be. I wish we were here under better circumstances."

"Me too, Ma’am." Looking around curiously, Gunny asked, "Where is the Commander anyway?"

Mac tensed slightly at the mention of Harm. "He’s talking to General Abdulla. I decided to take a look around the base myself, see if I could find out anything on my own."

If Gunny noticed her unease he didn’t show it. "Still on Mr. Webb’s mission, Ma’am?"

Pausing only for a moment, Mac decided Gunny was trustworthy enough to tell some of the details too. "Well, we’re still investigating the whereabouts of Kabir Atef. His brother, Mustafa, committed suicide after the tribunal, so Kabir is our only chance of finding out what their exact plans are. Webb has learned that after a short trip to Russia to enlist help, Kabir made his way back here to Afghanistan. We’re asking around camp first to see if anyone knows more. If no further information turns up, Harm and I are going to have to come up with a new game plan to find him."

"Well, if anyone can find him, Ma’am it’s you and the Commander. You’re quite a team."

"Yeah," Mac mumbled under her breath. "Quite a team."

Gunny had noticed her apprehension before, when he had mentioned the Commander, and had ignored it. Here it was again and this time Gunny was willing to help his friend if she was willing to let him. "Ma’am, would you like to talk about it?"

Mac started to offer up a statement of ignorance, but one look at Gunny’s face told Mac he knew that something was going on, no matter what she might say to the contrary. With that in mind, Mac relented. "Sure, Gunny. But I don’t really know what there is to say."

"Why don’t we take a walk, Ma’am. It’s a nice night. We can’t go outside the camp but it’ll be worth it."

Smiling slightly at his thoughtfulness, Mac gave in. "All right, Gunny, lead the way."

After walking in silence for a while, Gunny finally asked, "So what’s really bothering you, Ma’am?"

"Gunny, it’s just us out here. Call me Mac."

"It’s tough to do, Ma’am. I mean, Mac. You get used to things being a certain way ,and then it’s hard thinking of things any other way."

"Yeah, I know what you mean. When we were on the Guadalcanal, I was so confused about my life and what I had come to know as normal. Things were suddenly different and I didn’t feel like I could do anything about it. Then Harm showed up and knocked me for a loop...what a mess."

"There was definitely tension there."

"That’s an understatement. By the way, Gunny, I never did thank you for being there for me when I needed you."

Stopping and looking into her eyes, Gunny was surprised at the pull of attraction that he felt for her. If things were different...but they weren’t. Not only was she a superior officer, Sarah Mackenzie was in love with Harmon Rabb, and Gunny knew it. Even when he had comforted her on the Guadalcanal, he knew that her heart was with Harm. He had accepted it. "It was nothing, Mac."

"It meant a lot, Victor." Starting to walk again, Mac spoke. "You were there for me even when my best friend wasn’t."

"But, you worked all of that out. You’re friends again now, right?"

"Yeah, we are. But...oh I don’t know, I just wish things were different."

"How so?"

"I just wish he felt the same way I do."

"And how do you feel, Mac?" He knew but he wanted to hear the words from her.

She only hesitated a moment before answering. "I’m in love with him, Gunny."

"Maybe he does feel the same way."

Shaking her head, Mac ventured her opinion. "No, he doesn’t."

"How do you know that for sure?"

"Oh, come on, Gunny. He can flirt with every woman alive and not have a problem with it. But, me? He can turn and walk away without a backward glance. No, I’ll always be someone he cares for and respects, but that’s all. He’s made that abundantly clear on more than one occasion."

With a hand on her elbow he halted her forward motion. Turning her around he just stared at her with a look of disbelief on his face. "Then he’s a fool, Mac. You are an amazing woman and any man that looks at you as anything less than that doesn’t deserve you."

Tears welled up in her eyes at his passionate words. Finding her voice, Mac whispered, "Thank you, Victor. Thank you."

"You’re welcome, Mac," he uttered, then slowly lowered his lips to hers.

Their lips met in a soft kiss. But, as much as Mac wanted to feel it, the passion and fire just wasn’t there. Gunny was the one to pull away, knowing that he was fighting a losing battle. Her eyes met his begging for his forgiveness. "It’s all right, Mac. I know."

"I’m so sorry, Gunny. I just...can’t."

Cupping her cheek in the palm of his hand, Gunny drew her to him and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. "There’s nothing to be sorry for, Mac. I really do understand."

Relief reflected back at him through those dark brown eyes. "Thanks, Gunny. Walk me back?"

"Yes, Ma’am."

As they walked away, neither noticed the tall, Navy Commander watching them from the shadows. A Commander who now felt like his whole world was ending.

Darya Bulkh Valley Detention Camp Afghanistan

May 15, 2002 07:30 Local

"Harm, what happened to you last night? I thought that you were gonna stop by my quarters and..."

Cutting her off, Harm moved to the other side of the jeep, throwing another pack in the back. "It was late," he answered, his tone flat.

"Since, when has that ever stopped you before, Flyboy?" she teased, hoping it would draw him out of the mood he seemed to be in.

Normally it would have, but today it just pissed him off. "Since now, Colonel. Besides, there was nothing to report. Nothing has changed. Kabir isn’t here and no one else is talking. Unless you came up with something last night that I don’t know about." The sarcasm was dripping from every word.

Still confused by his strange behavior, Mac answered honestly. "No, nothing. I talked to Gunny last night, but our walk around the camp didn’t accomplish anything." Mac noticed Harm’s mood grow even darker, if that were possible, after she was through talking. What was up with him today?

"Well then, I guess we’re done here. We need to move if we’re going to check out the caves and surrounding villages then be back in time to make our transport." He was all business, never once looking at her while speaking.

Mac finally gave up. "Fine, Commander. Let’s get moving."

"Fine."

They spent a good part of the day searching the surrounding villages, asking questions in a fruitless attempt to turn up answers. All dead ends. Now they were on their way back to the prison camp, still not speaking to each other.

The tension was so thick in the open vehicle it could have been cut with a knife. Harm had drove around with a steely determination for the last five hours, always focusing on the vast desert in front of them. Neither paid attention to what was happening around them, and both were too wrapped up in their own private pain to notice what was about to happen.

That’s when all hell broke loose.

Afghanistan Unknown location

May 15, 2002 22:15 Local

"Harm, slow down would you? Walking faster isn’t going to help us find our way. We’re lost damn it," Mac sighed in frustration.

"We need to keep moving, Mac." Harm tossed over his shoulder. "We have no idea what the hell is out there and following us. If we keep moving at least..."

Mac cut him off, halting him with a hand on his arm. "Harm, we need to rest. We’ve been walking for two solid hours. We’re tired, sweaty, hungry. We need to stop for the night and hope to hell they find us in the morning before anyone else does."

Pulling away from her grasp he started to move again, muttering under his breath. "I wouldn’t worry about it, Colonel. I’m sure Gunny is already out leading the search party for you."

Unable to believe what he had just said, Mac stood rooted, hands planted firmly on her hips. "Excuse me? What did you just say?"

Realizing she had heard that last statement, Harm let out a soft curse. ‘Maybe if I ignore it ,it will just go away.’

"I asked you a question, Commander." So much for that.

Her Drill Sergeant tone of voice went all over Harm. Whirling around, Harm made his way back over to her. Stopping in front of her, he bent down, their faces barely an inch apart. "I think you heard me just fine the first time, Colonel."

"You’re damn right I did. Now I want to know what the hell you meant by that little comment."

"Take it however you want to, Mac." With that he turned and started walking again.

Mac couldn’t move. She was furious.

Realizing Mac wasn’t following, Harm paused, turning around to look at her. Seeing the mask of fury that had settled over her face, Harm gulped, knowing that it was only a matter of time before she really laid into him. Trying to defuse the already out of control situation Harm stammered, "Uh, Mac? We should really get moving before someone finds us."

The diversionary tactic failed miserably.

"Just who the hell do you think you are, Rabb?"

Lifting his hands up in surrender, Harm tried to apologize. "Look, I’m sorry, Mac. I had no business making a comment like that."

Marching over to him, Mac poked her finger into his chest. "You’re damn right, you didn’t. I don’t know where the hell all of that crap about Gunny came from, but there is nothing between me and Victor." Harm flinched at the use of Gunny’s real name, but Mac wasn’t even fazed. "And even if there was, why the hell would you care?"

"Look, I said I was sorry. Let’s just drop this and try to find a place to wait out the night. There are plenty of caves around here. You were right. We should settle down and rest."

Throwing her hands up in defeat, Mac sighed. "Whatever. Yeah, lets definitely find some way to run away from any form of an intimate conversation between us. I almost forgot who we are there for a minute. How silly of me. My apologies, Harm. It won’t happen again." Side stepping out of the way, Mac headed in the direction of the nearby caves, leaving Harm standing alone this time.

Finding his feet, Harm moved after her quickly, catching up to her in a few long strides. Reaching for her arm, he stopped her, bringing her around to face him. "I meant it, Mac. I really am sorry. I don’t want to spend the rest of the night fighting with you."

Hearing the sincerity in his voice, Mac exhaled slowly, letting some of the anger out with it. "I don’t want to fight with you either, Harm. Come on. Let’s find somewhere to stop. I’m beat."

Together they walked on in silence, but at least now it was a little more comfortable than it had been for most of the day. The moon light danced over the landscape casting shadows over the rocky terrain. Finally finding one of the smaller shallow caves, Harm entered first, taking a small flash light out of the pack and looking around.

It really wasn’t what he would have considered a cave. The rock had been hollowed out by the elements, but the effect was the same. A layer of sand had built up on the floor of the "cave" over time, providing at least some relief for their aching bodies. At least they wouldn’t be sleeping on rock.

"This will probably be as good as we’re gonna get tonight, Mac."

"It will do. At least now we’re not out in the open."

"Yeah." Making his way over to the back wall, Harm spread out one of the two blankets they had retrieved from the jeep and slid down onto it, leaning back against his pack. "Damn, I’m tired."

It had been one hell of a day. After driving most of the day, five hours roughly, Harm had been exhausted but wasn’t about to show it. Mac, ever observant, had noticed and insisted that Harm let her do some of the driving for a while. That’s when it started. Taking on fire, they had done there best to out run their assailants when their vehicle had almost collided with an errant animal and they had, inadvertently, ended up in a mine field. Harm had been thrown from the jeep and had narrowly escaped, lucky to have stepped on a dud. After that had happened, they had snatched what few supplies they could out of the back and had headed out on foot, careful to avoid any other boobie traps. It could have turned out a lot worse. What if it had been her that stepped on one of those mines instead of him? She could have been hurt or even...

Harm shuddered before glancing over at Mac, noticing she hadn’t moved. She just stood, looking out into the dark, desert night. "Mac?"

"Yeah?" she answered softly.

"Why don’t you come here. Sit down with me."

Turning, she eyed him warily, but eventually complied. Plopping down next to him, Mac allowed herself to relax for the first time all day. Drawing her knees up, she draped her arms over them, slumping her head forward in the process.

"You okay, Mac?"

"Yep, just peachy," was her muffled reply, never bothering to raise her head.

"Come on, Mac. It’s really not so bad."

"Not so bad? You almost died today, Harm. I almost lost you. I’d say it sucks," Mac retorted.

The true meaning behind her words didn’t even register with him. Trying to distract her, Harm did his best to stay positive. "Well, for the moment we’re safe. We have shelter. We have some food. We have each other. We’ve been in worse situations than this and made it through," Harm reasoned.

"I know, but that seems like a lifetime ago, Harm. Things were different then...they’re different now."

There was a sad finality in her voice that scared Harm. It was almost like she had given up. It was so unlike her.

Tentatively Harm placed his hand on her, gently rubbing circles on her back. "Come on, Mac. We’ll make it out of here and everything will be fine. We’ll be okay."

Mac looked at him incredulously. "Will we? Will we ever really be okay again?" Her gaze locked onto his and held it in the dimly lit cave.

Harm searched, desperately, for the right words. "We’re not talking about the mission anymore. Are we?"

Giving him a small snort, Mac muttered, "Never mind. Just forget it, Harm."

Sighing, Harm answered. "No, we might as well talk about it. It’s not like we have anything better to do."

"Well Gee, Harm, try to contain your enthusiasm." Mac stood angrily and resumed her spot by the cave’s entrance.

"I didn’t mean it like that, Mac."

Mac spun around and glared at him. "Like what? Like you could care less whether we ever work things out between us?"

"I never said that. Hell, I just didn’t think that you wanted there to be an ‘us’ anymore," Harm bit back.

"Why would you think that? I thought that’s what we were working toward, being friends and...maybe someday..."

"Mac, I’ve been trying; trying to do the friends thing. But I just don’t know if I can anymore."

Mac felt like she had been punched in the stomach. Panic welled up and settled in her eyes. "You don’t...you don’t want to be friends anymore?" The slight tremor in her voice could be heard throughout the still, semi-darkness.

"I just don’t think I can do it again, Mac. I don’t think I can sit back and watch while you fall into another relationship with someone else and pretend that I’m happy for you. It’s not fair, Mac. You can’t have us both." By the end of his small speech, his voice had risen to low roar; the thought of her with another man tearing him apart.

Mac was beyond confused. "What the hell are you talking about?"

There was a brief pause before she heard his ragged whisper. "I saw you, Mac."

"Saw me?" Then the light finally dawned. "Oh, God. You mean with Gunny...last night?"

"Yes. Jesus, Mac, what the hell were you thinking? You’re a superior officer. You could both be court martialed. God damn it, didn’t you learn your lesson with John Farrow?" Turning away, Harm began to pace their small confines before ending up back in her face. "And, with Gunny? What was it, Mac? Because you couldn’t wait for me until I got back, you ran to the Guadalcanal? You went running right to Gunny?"

The crack of her hand connecting with his cheek split the silence, the sound echoing off of the walls around them. When she spoke again, her words were measured, trying to keep her rage under control. "You arrogant bastard. Not everything is about you, you know? And it wasn’t like that. But why should you care? You were off comforting Renee. I had no one, Harm. No one! So, how dare you? How dare you judge me over something you know nothing about?"

Harm was furious, the pain stinging his cheek totally forgotten. "What’s there to know, Mac? I know what I saw."

"Did you even hear what we were talking about last night?" she asked, her voice a faint, pain filled whisper.

The question made him pause. He hadn’t heard anything that was said. But he had seen everything. Anger flared again as he answered her. "I saw him kiss you!" Harm practically shouted, his jealousy rearing its ugly head.

Harm was jealous. If Mac wasn’t so miserable the revelation would have been welcome. Now? Shaking her head sadly, Mac walked back over to the cave wall. Sliding down to the floor, Mac uttered brokenly, "You don’t know anything, Harm."

Seeing the wounded look in her eyes before she turned away, all of his anger slowly seeped away. "Then enlighten me, Mac."

When she looked at him this time he saw the lone tear that tracked it’s way down her face. Then she turned away from him again and laid down on the blanket. "Good night, Harm."

Afghanistan Unknown location

May 16, 2002 01:35 Local

Harm felt like an ass. He had been sitting up for the last two hours replaying his fight with Mac over and over in his head. He had acted like a jealous, lovesick fool. But wasn’t that what he was?

When he had watched Gunny touch her last night, seen him kiss her, everything within him had screamed in protest. Mac was his, damn it. It had been all he could do to keep from walking straight over to Gunny and beating the hell out of him. It was totally irrational of him to feel that way. He had no claim on Mac, as much as he might want to. If she wanted to start something with Gunny that was her business. But he had really thought they were on their way towards more.

Sure he hadn’t made much of an effort to woo her. He really wasn’t sure how to win Mac over. ‘Bull shit, Rabb. The reason you haven’t tried before now is because you’re a chicken.’ Great. He couldn’t even count on himself for moral support.

He was a chicken though. But he was trying to wait until they were a little more emotionally stable. Here lately their friendship had finally seemed to be getting back on track. There were knowing glances, silent communication, light touches, playful banter. There was also a whole bunch of sexual tension that couldn’t be overlooked any more. Or maybe it was just that he didn’t want to overlook it anymore.

Whatever the case, he had finally got up the nerve to have her over for dinner. Okay, maybe he had used the excuse of having her over for working purposes. But it had afforded him the perfect opportunity to spend some time with her, alone. He had went out of his way to make it as special as he could for her; soft music, candles, flowers. And then they had went out to dinner again after Sebring’s trial. It was starting to feel just like old times again, like they were finally getting back what they had lost so long ago.

Then last night...last night all of that hope, it had all disappeared within the space of a moment. Pain lanced his heart at the memory of the woman he was in love with in the tender embrace of another man.

The woman he was in love with...he was IN love with her. The revelation took him totally by surprise. Sure he knew he loved Mac, she was his best friend and he had told her as much on the Admiral’s porch, that she would always have someone who loved her. But he had never admitted to himself, or anyone else, that he was in love with her. But it was true. He loved Sarah Mackenzie more than anything in the whole world. Anything.

But now, by the look in her eyes earlier, she had given up on them. And somehow he knew it was all his fault. God, he had all but told her earlier that he didn’t want to be friends with her anymore. What the hell had he been thinking? It didn’t matter what she decided to do, he needed her in his life. If friendship was the only way, he’d take it, but the thought of a life without her was unacceptable. And he knew he needed to tell her that before he lost her completely.

"I can hear the wheels turning all the way over here, Harm. You wanna keep it down?" she teased, her voice muffled by her arm.

Harm chuckled, although there was no joy in it. "Sorry, Mac. Didn’t mean to wake you."

Sighing heavily, Mac heaved herself into a sitting position next to him before continuing. "You didn’t wake me. I’ve been laying here, awake, for the last two hours."

"You trying to avoid me?" he asked, trying to tease but knowing he was serious.

"Yeah, I guess I was," she replied quietly.

They sat there a moment longer before Harm broke the silence. "I’m sorry, Mac."

It was spoken so softly she almost didn’t hear it. But she had heard it, and the sincerity of it melted some of the ice around her heart. "It’s all right, Harm."

"No, it’s not, Mac. I hurt you and I’m sorry. I just...I just didn’t know how to...deal with what I saw yesterday. I have never felt like that in my life."

"Like what," Mac prodded gently.

"Like I had lost my last chance at everything I have ever wanted." He looked away, staring at the wall opposite them. "I realized, while I was sitting here just now, that I really meant what I said all those months ago. I don’t ever want to lose you, Mac. Ever."

"And I told you, Harm. No matter what happens..."

"Tell me what you were talking about last night," he cut her off before she could finish her promise. "Please, Mac. Tell me what I was really looking at."

Taking a deep breath, Mac spoke. "We were talking about you." It was her turn to look away.

Using a finger, he brought her eyes around and level with his. "What about me?"

Fear gripped her. She couldn’t lay it out for him again. She just couldn’t. "Harm, I...I can’t..."

Harm recognized the fear. He was scared to death too. But this was it. It was time. "You can. You don’t have to be afraid anymore. I promise you, Mac. I promise you things will end differently this time. Tell me, please."

"I told him that I wished things were different between us, you and I. The kiss you saw was him trying to comfort me, make me feel wanted. But it wasn’t right coming from him. There is nothing going on between me and Gunny, Harm. Nothing."

Without warning, Harm grabbed her arm and pulled her onto him, straddling his lap. His arms wrapped around her, holding her so tightly, like he never intended to let go. She almost couldn’t breathe, but Mac wasn’t about to complain. He began placing kisses all over her face and neck and when he reached her ear, she felt, as well as heard, his ragged whisper. "Things are different now, Mac. This time I’m not letting you go until you know how much I love you; how much I want you."

Mac pulled away from him, stunned. "Wha...what did you just say?" she barely croaked out.

"I love you, Sarah Mackenzie," he answered with a sincerity that rocked her whole world.

"That’s what I thought you said," she murmured, grasping his face in both hands and bringing her lips down to his.

Fire. Harm’s body was on fire in an instant; the moment their mouths met. Rational thought was but a distant memory. The only thing that remained was the incredible sensations Mac was creating with every movement of her body against his. Every motion, every touch, fanned the flames of desire raging through them both. Tearing his mouth away from hers, he drew back enough to just look at her while still keeping the intimate contact of their bodies.

She was so beautiful. With her lips slightly swollen from his kiss and her eyes glazed over with passion, Harm had never seen anything more desirable. "Mac, I want you. But..." Harm broke off, taking in their surroundings.

"But?"

"But this wasn’t exactly how I pictured our first time together. It should be special," Harm paused, momentarily distracted by the pulse pounding furiously in her neck. Unable to stop himself, Harm touched his lips to the point, sucking gently before letting his tongue trace a pattern up to the sensitive spot behind her ear. "You deserve romance; candles and flowers and soft music in the background." Each point was punctuated by another kiss to a different part of her neck.

Barely able to breathe, let alone think from his ministrations, she was somehow able to form a reply. "Well, this isn’t exactly how I pictured our first time either. But...well, we have moonlight, that’s pretty romantic," Mac rasped close to his ear before catching his lobe between her teeth.

The small action sent the blood rushing through his body, settling right in his groin. "Oh God, Mac." Bringing her lips back to his, he kissed her hungrily, his mouth ravaging hers. Finally he loosened his hold on her, his hands beginning to explore her body, seeming to touch her everywhere all at once.

Forcing herself partially away from him, Mac softly pleaded. "Make love to me, Harm."

Harm searched her face for any sign of uncertainty. "Are you sure, Sarah? I don’t want you to feel pressured. I’ll wait as long as it takes."

Smiling sweetly down at him, Mac replied. "I don’t want to wait anymore...I love you too, Harm. Please?"

Hearing those words from her tore down that final wall. They were finally going to get it right. "Yes," was the only answer he could give her. His fingers tangled in her hair, his mouth meeting hers once more. He couldn’t get enough of the taste of her. After six long years wanting, waiting, wondering, Harm finally had everything he had ever needed right here in his arms.

Sitting back, Mac started working on the buttons of her uniform shirt only to be stopped by his hands on hers. When she looked at him questioningly, Harm answered her. "I want to undress you."

Moving her hands out of the way, Harm unbuttoned each button, his eyes never leaving hers. After releasing the last one, Harm nudged her khaki fatigues out of the way and began tugging the white undershirt from the waistband of her pants. When his hands finally reached under to caress her bare skin, Mac moaned, the heat from his touch branding her. With her added encouragement, he pushed the tee shirt up, his hands still encircling her body. The rough texture of his palms gliding over her ultra sensitive skin sent ripples of pleasure zinging to every nerve ending.

Bunching the shirt up under her arms, her white sports bra was revealed, her hardened nipples straining against the fabric. Harm groaned deep in his throat, seeing exactly what he did to her, how much he turned her on. Meeting her eyes, he silently asked permission to take what he wanted and Mac nodded her assent. Not needing any further persuasion, Harm pushed the material out of the way, exposing her full breasts to his hungry gaze. "Oh, wow."

At the total awe in his voice, she felt empowered. "You like, Flyboy?" Mac cooed seductively.

"Oh, yeah." It was Mac’s turn to groan as his hands covered both of her globes, kneading them, molding them. When he caught one of her nipples between his teeth, Mac cried out, her fingers spiking through his hair to hold him to her. "You like that, Marine?" Harm asked, turning her question back on her.

"Yes. Damn, you’re good at that," Mac replied breathlessly.

"You told me to be good. I’m just following orders, Colonel." Harm mumbled, his mouth still busy nipping on her breasts.

"Mmm. Well, we’ll see how good you really are in a minute, Commander. Right now," Mac pulled her nipple out of his mouth with a juicy ‘pop’, "now, it’s your turn." Pausing long enough to rid herself of her shirts and bra, Mac then slowly, methodically, began the task of undressing him. Working the buttons of his fatigues, Mac mirrored his actions from earlier.

Pushing his undershirt up, she began stroking his muscled chest and stomach, smiling when they quivered in response to her touch. When she reached his beaded nipples, Mac licked her lips before leaning in to suck one into her mouth while her fingernails scraped over the other.

Harm sucked in a sharp breath. "Mac..."

Enjoying his groans of pleasure, Mac had barely gotten his undershirt off of him before she went straight for the button on his pants.

"A little eager, aren’t we?" Harm smiled up at her, amusement dancing in his eyes.

"I need you, Harm. I need you inside me," Mac replied huskily while easing his zipper down.

Amusement was instantly replace by a barely controlled desire for only this woman. No one else would do now. No one else could ever satisfy this hunger inside of him; no one but her. When her hand snaked inside his boxers to grasp him firmly, emotion was gone and instinct took over.

Sealing their lips in a passionate kiss, Harm returned the favor. Undoing her pants, his fingers slipped under the elastic of her white cotton panties, palming her sex. At her sharp gasp, Harm began stroking her, his fingers dipping inside her moist heat. She rocked back and forth, countering each stroke of his fingers. "Come on, baby. That’s it. That’s it, Sarah. Don’t hold back. Come for me." When she began to whimper, as much from his words as his actions, Harm almost lost it. Her head was thrown back, her body arched, breasts thrust forward. She was the most incredibly sexy creature Harm had ever seen.

Speeding up his fingers, Harm worked diligently to coax the orgasm out of her body. Circling her clit one last time, Mac cried out, falling forward onto his chest. Harm rubbed her back, waiting patiently while her breathing returned to normal. After only a few moments, Mac took advantage of her position, licking and kissing the sculpted muscles of his chest. Her fingers played in the soft hair while her mouth worked on him, and before long Harm was squirming beneath her, unable to get close enough to her.

Breaking contact, Mac stood swiftly to remove the rest of her clothing. Harm sat transfixed as slowly her body was completely revealed to him for the first time. She was magnificent. Mac stood there, watching Harm watching her, and felt heat settle in her core once more. Moving back to him, Mac helped him remove the rest of his uniform. Splayed out on his back, completely naked and aroused, Mac licked her lips in anticipation while kneeling between his spread legs. Starting at his feet, her hands glided up his calves, caressing the insides of his thighs before reaching his swollen member. She couldn’t get over it. He was absolutely gorgeous and he was all hers.

As Harm was about to reach for her and bring her to him, Mac lowered her mouth to his straining erection. "Oh, God! Mac, baby, I’m too close. You need to...oh, God."

Smiling up at him, Mac just shook her head. "I want to taste you. I’ve wanted to do this ever since I met you." Her mouth started sucking again, and Harm’s eyes rolled back, a guttural groan escaping his lips. Sensing he was close, Mac kissed her way up his body, their lips finally melding in a searing kiss. Before Mac could react, Harm had her on her back, his body settling between her open thighs.

"Mac...please," he rasped desperately.

"Yes...oh, yes, Harm." She was as desperate as he.

With that he entered her.

Harm’s senses began to spin out of control at the feel of Mac’s body engulfing his. The fit was perfect, every thrust evoking more pleasure than either had ever experienced before. She was so tight, so warm. "God, you feel so good, Mac. So good." Looking down at her, his breath caught in his throat as all the love he felt for her threatened to overwhelm him.

Mac met his loving gaze. Urging him on, she met him thrust for thrust, their rhythm building to an almost unbearable tempo, with each needing more.

"Harm, please. Harder...harder."

"Don’t. want. to. hurt. you." Each word was punctuated by another lunge of his hips, Harm trying to control the uncontrollable.

"Won’t break, Harm. Need all of you," Mac grunted inarticulately.

Harm’s hold on reality snapped. Grasping her thighs, he pushed her knees almost up to her chest, allowing his cock to slide deeper inside of her.

"Oh, Christ. Mac..."

"Yesss," the word hissed out between her teeth. "Oh, yeah..."

Harm pounded into her over and over, unable to stop his impending climax. "Mac, I’m...I’m..."

"I’m there, Harm. Come with me." Mac pleaded.

Harm’s world suddenly exploded in a blinding flash of beautiful light as he spilled his seed deep inside of her. His breathing ragged, Harm collapsed on top of Mac, crushing her to him. Mac held on tightly, her body trembling, emotions as well as feelings spilling over and out of her.

When he had the strength to move, Harm rolled to the side bringing her with him, never breaking their intimate connection. Reaching for the other blanket they had with them, Harm covered them, cocooning them in warmth. Seeking her lips out, Harm kissed her with everything he had. Needing air once more, Harm laid his forehead against hers. "I love you so much, Mac. Never forget that. Don’t ever forget that."

His words touched her deep down to her soul. "I love you, Harm. I always have. I always will."

Unable to speak over the lump that had formed in his throat, Harm wrapped her tighter in his loving embrace.

Afghanistan Unknown location

"We should probably get dressed. If someone finds us, or we have to move in a hurry, we need to be ready." Even though she knew it was truth she couldn’t help but feel dejected at the thought of not laying here, skin to skin, with him.

Harm wasn’t feeling any better about it. "You’re right. I just wish...I just wish we were home. More time. No worries. I want to hold you like this forever."

Mac’s breath caught in her throat. "That sounds an awful lot like a commitment, Flyboy," Mac squeaked out.

"What if it is?" he asked quietly.

"Then I’d say ‘yes’."

Mac could almost feel his ‘Flyboy’ smile, she didn’t have to see it.

They laid there in silence a few minutes more, before Mac heard his beautiful voice filling her ears.

‘Lady, when you’re with me I’m smiling. Give me all of your love.’

Blushing in the dark, Mac whispered softly to him, "Eighties rock, huh? I’m impressed."

"Well, I told you that you deserved music. And this is a great song."

"I wasn’t complaining," Mac teased. "Just didn’t expect it that’s all."

"Well get used to it, Marine. Now shut up and let me serenade you."

Mac giggled into his chest before quieting. "I’m sorry. Please continue."

Looking deep into her eyes he began again.

‘Your hands build me up when I’m sinking. Just touch me and my troubles all fade.’

Harm hugged her tighter to him before he continued.

‘Lady, from the moment I saw you, standing all alone. You gave all the love that I needed. So shy, like a child who had grown.

You’re my Lady, of the morning. Love shines in your eyes. Softly, clear and lovely. You’re my Lady.’

"That was so beautiful, Harm," Mac spoke softly, her voice barely audible.

Harm traced the delicate features of her face with the tip of his finger. "You’re the most amazing woman I’ve ever known, Sarah Mackenzie."

Mac had no words to express how full her heart was at that moment. Instead of trying, she gave into her emotions and cried.

And Harm was content to just hold her.

Afghanistan Unknown location

May 16, 2002 08:15 Local

Gunny stepped back from the opening of the cave, a small smile about his lips. ‘Well, I’ll be damned.’

Walking a few yards away, Gunny lighted on a nearby rock formation, pulling the radio out of his pocket. The crackle and static gave way to a live voice and Gunny relayed the message.

"Mr. Webb, I’ve found them."

USS. Sea Hawk

May 16, 2002

"What the hell happened to you two?" Clayton Webb asked incredulously.

"Don’t even start, Webb." Harm held up his hand to ward off further comment.

"Well at least tell me you found out something about Kabir."

"Sorry, Webb. No luck," Mac stated flatly. "Our search turned up absolutely nothing."

"Damn it!"

At that moment Bud came around the corner. "Oh good, you’re all here."

Harm looked anxiously at Mac and then Webb before facing Bud. "What is it, Lieutenant?"

"Sirs, Ma’am. We’ve just intercepted a message. I think you’re going to want to see this."

Harm’s Apartment North of Union Station

May 24, 2002

Harm sat on his couch totally exhausted. He hadn’t heard anything from Mac and he was really starting to get worried. Usually she at least tried to e-mail him and let him know what was going on. But there had been no word from her in at least four days. The feeling of unease was growing. Laying his head back against the couch, Harm tried in vain to push aside thoughts of Mac. It was no use. She was there to stay.

It had been a really long couple of weeks. The terrorists had been thwarted, everyone doing their part to stop the attack in time. After it was all over Mac and Harm had reunited with a hug that neither had bothered trying to hide. They were on their way back to Mac’s quarters when Webb stopped them.

"Mac, can I have a word with you?" Clay looked everywhere but at Harm.

More than a little nervous Mac agreed. "Sure, Clay. Harm, go on ahead. I’ll be there in a sec." She silently pleaded with him to grant her wish.

"Yeah, sure," Harm muttered before walking away, not liking it at all that he was being left out of the loop.

After he was out of earshot, Mac started in. "So, what’s up, Clay?"

"Mac, I need you."

She had returned to her quarters, finding Harm pacing the room like a caged animal. One look at her face and he knew he wasn’t going to like this.

"No."

Mac was taken back. "Excuse me?"

"No. Whatever it is he wants you to do the answer is no," Harm said with a finality that left no room for negotiation.

Mac did her best to hold her temper in check. "Look, Harm, that’s my decision to make. Webb needs me."

"Well, what about me, Mac? What if I need you?"

Mac closed her eyes, trying to make it easier to do this to him. "Harm, don’t do this."

"I’m serious, Mac. Who’s more important? Him or me?" Harm challenged.

"Who was more important, Harm? Me or Renee?" Mac watched as the cloud descended over his eyes.

"That was a low blow, Mac," Harm managed through clenched teeth.

Sighing in frustration, Mac replied. "You’re right. I’m sorry. But, the same principals apply. Harm, this is something I have to do. This isn’t about being selfish. This isn’t about you. This is about my job. It’s about upholding an oath that I took, to my country, to do whatever I can to defend it. It has nothing to do with us, Harm."

Running his hand through his hair in frustration he knew she was right. He just wasn’t ready to deal with it at the moment. Turning toward the door, he mumbled, "I need to get out of here for awhile. I need some time alone." With that he walked out leaving her alone and hurting.

She had let him go, knowing they both needed time to adjust to this latest blow they had been dealt. They had made it through tough times before and they’d make it through this too. And after giving him an hour to himself, Mac went after him, having a pretty good idea where to find him.

Walking out onto the fan tail, Mac called out, "Hey, Sailor."

He didn’t turn around, choosing to continue looking out over the ocean.

Mac moved to stand next to him, not touching but standing close enough to him that he had no choice but to acknowledge her. They looked out over the railing, both watching the sun setting on the horizon. Without saying a word, Harm reached out to her, drawing her into his arms, holding her close while still watching the sunset. Both watched in silence as the colors danced upon the water, casting their world in brilliant shades of yellow, red and orange. When the spectacular display was over, Harm finally looked deep into her eyes.

"Nothing’s changed, Mac. I love you."

"You’re right, Harm. Nothing’s changed. I love you, too," she whispered, laying her head against his chest.

They continued to watch, the sun finally dipping below the surface of the water.

"When do you have to leave?" she asked tentatively.

"My transport leaves at 2000."

"That doesn’t give us much time," her small voice sounded so sad.

"No it doesn’t." Harm agreed.

"I wish you didn’t have to go." She finally met his gaze, her eyes reflecting how hard it really was to make the decision she had made.

"Me too, Mac." Touching his palm to her cheek, Harm rubbed his thumb along her full bottom lip, before placing a gentle kiss on her lips. Pulling her head back to his chest, he held her, their bodies softly swaying as if dancing. Then she heard the sweetest music.

‘Babe, I’m leaving. I must be on my way. The time is drawing near. My train is going, I see it in your eyes. The love beneath your tears. I’ll be lonely without you, and I’ll need your love to see me through. So please believe me, my heart is in your hands. I’ll be missing you.’

Harm lifted her chin to look at him as he continued to sing to her.

‘You know it’s you, Babe. Whenever I get weary and I’ve had enough, feel like giving up. You know it’s you, Babe. Giving me the courage and the strength I need, please believe that it’s true. Babe, I love you.’

He could feel the tremors coursing through her body as she attempted to control her tears.

‘Babe, I’m leavin’, I’ll say it once again. And somehow try to smile. I know the feeling we’re trying to forget, if only for a while. Cause I’ll be lonely without you, and I’ll need your love to see me through. Please believe me my heart is in your hands. I’ll be missing you. Babe, I love you. Babe, I love you.’

Trying to reign in her emotions, Mac swallowed a couple of times, attempting to get rid of that pesky lump in her throat. Harm just gave her time, brushing away her tears with the palm of his hand and the pad of his thumb.

"I never knew Eighties rock could be so romantic. Of course maybe it’s just the man singing it."

Then she smiled that smile that did funny things to him in the pit of his stomach. "You’re even more beautiful when you smile, Mac."

Pleased by the compliment, Mac blushed prettily. "You sure know how to sweep a girl off of her feet, Sailor. A night ‘out’ and dancing. I’m impressed."

Harm graced her with his cocky, "Flyboy" grin. "And this is only our second ‘date’. You haven’t seen nothing yet. I can be incredibly romantic when I want to be," he countered, raising his eyebrows suggestively.

Mac just giggled. "I just bet you can, Harmon."

Bringing her flush against his body, Harm bent down to tease her lips with his own. "I like it when you call me Harmon."

"I’ll have to remember that," she mumbled into his mouth. Tongues met and mated, starting the dance their bodies would soon finish. When she felt his erection pressing into her stomach she suggested, "Why don’t we move this inside, Sailor, so I can give you a proper goodbye."

"Yes, Ma’am."

They had made love again, pouring everything they could into this session, wanting the memories to sustain them until the next time they were together.

After that she had walked him to the helo, and as discreetly as she could, hugged him. Placing her lips to his ear, she uttered, "I’ll be home soon. I love you."

"I love you, Sarah."

With that she backed away and watched as the helicopter took off and carried him away. Silently, she prayed that she would make it home to him, and he offered up a similar prayer for her...

Harm was brought out of his thoughts by a knock on the door. Confusion set in. It was the middle of the afternoon on a Friday, and normally he wouldn’t be home but the Admiral had granted him his request for some personal leave. Truth was he just couldn’t handle being there, at JAG, without her.

At the persistent knocking, Harm grumbled. "Hold on a sec. I’m coming."

When he opened his door, Harm went numb.

"Are you Commander Harmon Rabb, Jr.?" one of the gentleman in full military dress asked.

Harm couldn’t speak, so he just nodded his head in the affirmative. His mind flashed back to a time when he had witnessed his mother talking to a similar man in uniform. Somehow he knew what these men were here for, but he didn’t want to accept what that meant. When the man spoke, Harmon Rabb’s world ended.

"Commander Rabb, we regret to inform you that Lt. Colonel Sarah Mackenzie was killed in the line of duty..."

Everything else he said faded away as Harm, no longer strong enough to hold his own weight, slid down the wall to the floor and cried.

The End...for now.