"Tess, Buddha and Me"
Part 1: First Sutta
By Pinky Banana

Rating: PG.
Summary:  The story starts around the �Crazy� episode.  Where this fic is going I�m not sure.  Let�s see!
Author�s Notes:  �Sutta� is a Buddhist word for lesson or discourse I think; so the chapters are called �suttas�.  



She stood in front of the mirror straightening out her clothes unnecessarily - just to keep her hands busy.  Tilting her head she examined the deep V of her blood red top.  She liked red.  It made her feel real, as opposed to the way she normally felt.  She plopped down on her frilly pink canopy bed and looked around liked a stranger in a strange place.  The room was girlish to the point of sugar overload - lace and roses with a white background to everything.  He�d left out no detail.  But then he was always clever that way.  He was coldly clever about everything and in that way he was a father.

A large full tote bag lay in a chair, its patent leather blackness making it look bold and lonely in the sterile brightness of Pink Land.  Her bedroom door swung open suddenly but she just kept swinging one crossed leg without turning.

�Are you ready?�  The tones were familiarly clipped and unemotional.

�Yes.�

�Look at me.�  She turned immediately.  �You remember what to do?�

�Could I forget?  You�ve been telling me every day for two months.�

His eyes seemed to quickly examine her for any noticeable defects.  �You sound less than enthused, Tess.�  The slightly mocking lilt in his voice still grated her nerves after all these years but she learned to hide the fact.  �It�s time to claim your destiny.�

�Good,� she said flatly, turning away again.  

�Let�s go.�  He moved out of sight.

�Nacedo.�

�Yes?� came the disembodied voice.

Her question died before she asked it.  �Nevermind.�  She picked up her bag and followed him.

*~*~*~*~*

Malamud clucked sympathetically and patted Kyle on the back as they stared out across the school parking lot.  �I feel for you, dude.�

Kyle managed to spare him a quick, skeptical glance, barely taking his eyes off the silver Infiniti and a girl�s long legs.  They seemed to pour out from the passenger�s side like syrup.   All three items were built for speed and he�d had the pleasure of driving two of them.  Suddenly his line of vision was blocked.

�Nah, seriously!  It�s not right. What she�s doing is not right.�

�Malamud�� Kyle began trying to crane his head to watch the progress of the driver and passenger while pretending not to, �Don�t give me the pity act.  If you see a nail in someone�s eye, your version of helping is to screw it in deeper.�

�See now that�s where you�re wrong.  You�re a guy.  I�m a guy.  And those legs - � he paused, pointing at them in fascination.

Kyle swiped his hand down.  �Stop being so damn obvious!�

��whoa, those legs!  Those legs are like the - �  Malamud squinted, pretending to mold something in his hands.  �I just want one of �em for Christmas.  And there ain�t nothing like a red-haired babe!�

�It�s auburn, fool.�

Malamud made a goofy face of surprise.  �Oh, auburn!  Excuse me while I bite myself.�  He sobered up.  �But hey look - she�s not worth the pain you�re going through, man.  She�s a pimpette, a man-eater, a snake goddess.�

Kyle said nothing.

�Kyle, the only thing that could make this situation better is if�the freak was with me!  Paah-haaaaah�!�

�What an asshole!� Kyle muttered walking away from him.  Malamud could crack all the jokes he wanted, but the �situation� wasn�t funny.  He stopped short because he caught himself almost catching up to the couple.  The girl laughed at something her companion said and smiled.  It was that bright, honest, promising smile that said �You�re the one.�  How many suckers had she sucked into her void with it?  He wished that he hadn�t been one of them.

Kyle lit a cigarette, pacing near the entrance, pushing Malamud inside just as the dead-brain started to open his trap again.  Shoving his hands in his back pockets, he remembered his father - Jimbo - riding him hard about picking up the habit.  Yeah, he always thought of him as �Jimbo� when Jimbo was in lecture mode.  Jimbo forbade him to smoke in the house - or anywhere else - like he was Little Lord Fontleroy or something.  Man!

Mr. Fredericks, the principal, walked up on him, briefcase in hand.  �The school bell is about to ring in less than thirty seconds, Mr. Valenti.  Isn�t there somewhere you want to be?�

Yeah.  As far away from this sh*t piece of town - and you - as possible in less than thirty seconds please.  �Yes, there is, Mr. Fredericks.�

�Get inside, Mr. Valenti.  Or shall I inform your father that you are being difficult yet again?�

�No, you shan�t have to do that today.  I might be in the mood tomorrow though.�  With that he threw down the cig and entered the building just as the first bell rang, thinking that the only good thing about today was that it would end.

�We can discuss the matter further at detention today, Mr. Valenti.�

Whatever and ever, cheese-eater.

*~*~*~*~*

Spanish - 3rd period�

It looked like the �only good thing about today� might never happen.  Kyle had to sit there and watch her back.  He couldn�t help it.  She was in the same room with him - so close.  So untouchable.  It was like being used to breathing and then suddenly he couldn�t anymore.  Er�well, the comparison was a little extreme but close to the truth.  She was now answering a question posed by Mrs. Galves in perfect Spanish of course.  The lilt of her voice and the shift of her back seemed to taunt him on purpose.

�Excelente, Senorita Delany!�

Kyle sighed, disgusted with his own lovelorn crap.  It was sickening.  Yeah, her last name was Delany.  And no, it wasn�t Vicki.  Vicki was the twit of the century.  He just wanted to get with someone quick.  At the time Liz Parker had just dumped him and she was the first girl he cared about like that.  He hadn�t been in love with her really but she had this kinda quiet cool maturity but she was still, y� know, a girl.  A girl girl.  Plus, those big clear brown eyes were winners.  She was hottish in a low-key kinda way and he liked it.  Then�Tall, Mysterious, and Weird (that d*mn Max Evans!) came along with whatever weirdness he did in the Crashdown that day�or maybe Liz just hit her head hard when she fell or got shot or got her fix because she�d been real weird too ever since.  Whatever it was it turned him way off and he was completely over her now - just like the cow that jumped the moon.  Anyway, so Vicki took very little persuading but they never did it because�well�Vicki just annoyed him.  She acted dumber than she actually was and she whined too much.  When the time came and she was willing, he wasn�t.  He couldn�t quite get over that.  2nd base with her was enough for him.

But one night they were on the couch in her living room in the dark making out like there was no tomorrow and it was okay; it was good.  It was 2am - that time in the morning when you feel like you�re outside reality and beyond the reach of wisdom.  It was a time when you�re most tempted to slide to home base no matter who you�re with and possibly create a sh*tload of regrets.  Suddenly the room was flooded with light and they leaped away from each other, disheveled and partially undressed.

�Well-well!  I got here just in time to see your babymaker in action, cousin.  Not bad.�

While his sight was still trying to adjust to the light, Kyle felt Vicki�s finger at his fly and he grabbed them, squinting at the girl unabashedly watching.  �Whoa!  This ain�t the Discovery Channel.�

�I�m just trying to zipper you up!� she hissed, obviously embarrassed.  She stood up to face the intruder, adjusting her clothes as she did so.  �Why are you coming in here so late, Corvette?�

�Well, I live here.�

�Just temporarily, cousin.�

�I�m spending the school year here, so I think it�s appropriate to say �I live here�.

When the spots faded from his eyes, Kyle found himself staring into seriously potent green eyes and he was hooked before his senses fully registered the connected bod to die for.  Excelente!   �Your name�s Corvette?� he asked dazedly.

Vicki snorted.  �Let me give you the story.  My dear cousin here is visiting from San Francisco.  She just got here yesterday.  Her father�s a Buddhist gearhead pothead - known on the west coast as �Goobie Dan D.� - who always wears sandals on his funky breath-robbing feet even in winter - just the kind of weirdo to name his kid after a car.  He spent all his money investing in a marijuana farm, got his *ss caught and now can�t take care of his four kids.  They each got shipped off to different family members and, oh what a joy, we got this one.�

Corvette only smiled.  �Blood�s still thinner than water, huh, Vick?�  She took out pen and paper and began to write.

Vicki�s eyes bulged as she said with relish, �And Goobie was adopted so he�s not even a real Delany and neither are you.�

Kyle couldn�t believe what he was hearing.  Vicki whined but she never got mad at anybody.  Here she was standing red-faced and ready to rumble.  All he could do was stare at Corvette, his eyes widening in appreciation as she strutted right up to him, dressed like she just came from a Milan runway.

�What are you doing?�  Vicki practically screeched, fists balled.

Corvette stared warmly into his eyes and he felt himself helplessly leaning in.  �If you wanna do better, call me.�  She tucked a slip of paper into his shirt pocket.

�You bitch�!�

Then it became a scene right out of old-time Jerry Springer; and although he got scratched up like the dickens, he protected that little piece of paper with his life.  As it turned out Vicki�s strange behavior was caused by her refusal to take any Prozac that month.   Needless to say, she dumped him quick and he barely registered the fact because it was�Corvette Time!  From then on she simply had her way with his heart - a first for him.  She was very good to him for a while.  She said all the right words, did all the right things.  Incredibly, he was thinking this could be �the one�.  But so early in his young bachelorhood?  His jock crew thought he was lucky but nuts.  So what?  She was the hottest girl he�d ever met!  Corvette waited until he trusted her enough and was open enough to admit he was a virgin.  (Wow, there�s gotta be a more masculine name for it.  Shees!)  She waited until she took his innocence.  (Yeah, he couldn�t believe that he �Super Jock Kyle Valenti� had needed to be coaxed into it because he didn�t want to disappoint her.  Because wanted it to be special with her.  He couldn�t believe he�d been such a�!)  She waited until the heartfelt words �I love you� came tumbling stupidly from his lips and then she became The Kyle-Eater - in the most negative sense possible�.

The bell rang jolting Kyle out of his depressed musings.  Enough of this sh*t.   Move on, boy, move on.  He slammed his books shut and was the first to exit the classroom.  He rushed head down around a corner and - BLAM!   Books, papers pens and the entire contents of a black patent leather tote flew everywhere.  He reflexively grabbed the short blond about to crash into the lockers behind her but he used too much force because he landed flat on his back and thick blond hair smothered him.  

Amid all the other exclamations of surprise and humor was clearly heard��Classic, Valenti, classic!�� from Malamud, his crazy cackle rising high above the din before fading down the hallway.

Death at a young age was underrated, wasn�t it?  In his head Kyle could hear Beck�s �Loser�.

Finally the hair slid away and he could breathe freely again - although the scent wasn�t bad.

�Are you alright?�

Kyle looked up into mildly concerned blue eyes set in a cherub cute face, leaning over him - one he�d never seen before.  A newbie.  Even with the wind knocked out of him and a sharp pain in his *ss, he registered the fact that she wasn�t his type.  �Yeah, I�m fine.  I only cracked my skull breaking your fall, that�s all.  Could you - ?�  He motioned dramatically for her to move out of the way.

Her eyes cooled a few degrees.  �Sorry.�   She stood and started picking up her things.  

Kyle felt around underneath him and pulled out a broach.  �I think this is yours,� he said dryly, as he stood  up too and handed it to her.

The girl�s eyes flashed briefly with pain - or something - before she wordlessly snatched it out of his hand and shoved it quickly along with everything else into her bag.

�You.  Are.  Welcome.  It was only stabbing my *ss, so don�t worry about it.�

The last things she scooped up were her books and then she brushed past him without so much as a glance in the now empty hall.   He shook his head and bent over to pick up his shoulder bag.

�It looks fine to me, Tight Boy.�

He swiveled around in time to see her disappear into a classroom.  Not his type, ungrateful and had a smart mouth.  If he saw her again, it would be too soon.  He started down the hall thinking if he didn�t have detention, he�d skip class the rest of the day.  And he would have if he felt like hearing it at home and getting the car keys taken away.  Since he didn�t, he wouldn�t - so onto the joys of algebra!  

No, he didn�t need a girl right now.  He needed something else.  The head cheerleader half-ran - and when she saw him, half-jiggled - past him down the hall.  She flashed the biggest smile he�d seen all day, saying in a voice as warm as honey in tea, �Hi, Kyle.�  

�Hi, Diane.�

Or maybe he did need a rebound girl.  But she kept jiggling and he kept walking.   Shit, he didn�t know what he needed, but he might find out tonight after a couple swigs from the old man�s bottle of scotch�.