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A man parks his car in front of the main entrance of the Parliament House. Immediately, a member of the security team goes after him yelling:

Sir! Sir! You cannot park in here! All the Assembly members are about to go out!

The man replies:
Don't worry. I have a good alarm in my car.

Nawaz Sharif finds a magic lamp. He rubs it and out comes a genie.

The genie gives Nawaz one wish.

Nawaz pulls out a map of Karachi with many red marks on it and says "I'd like peace in these areas."

The genie says "You are asking too much of me. Even I can't bring peace to all these areas."

Nawaz says "Ok. Well just make Raiwind beautiful."

And the genie thinks for a while and then says "Let me see that map again."---

Heaven, is when you have:

         *   American Salary
    *   British Home
     *   Chinese Food
      *   Pakistani Wife

Hell, is when you have:

   *   American Wife
*   British Food
   *   Chinese Home
     *   Pakistani Salary

A turkey was chatting with a bull."I would love to be able to get to
the top of that tree," sighed the turkey,"but I haven't got the energy."
"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients."
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.
The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
Finally after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Moral of the story:

Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

Late one night a mugger wearing a ski mask jumped into the path of a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs.

"Give me your money," he demanded.

Indignant, the affluent man replied, "You can't do this-I'm an MNA, Member of the National Assembly!"

"In that case," replied the robber, "give me my money!"

An insect fell into a mug of beer

Englishman : Throws his mug away and walks out, Accuses middle east disturbance
due to Palestine, makes the insect to fell in the Mug.

American : Takes the insect out and drinks the beer & Accuses Osama Bin Laden
for that insect terrorist Attack.

Chinese : Eats the insect and throws the beer away, wash the mug & think to made
Mug locally, so that they can throw away when they like.

Indian    : Accuses the ISI & Pakistan for throwing insect
                    into his beer. Relates the issue to Kashmir freedom fighting.
                    Sells the beer to the American, Mug to Englishman and insect to
                    the Chinese and gets a new mug of beer. Asks the Israel to provide
                    him training for insect control & Russia to provide arms.
                    Put up all the TV channels & print media to campaign the issue.

Pakistani    : Throw away both mug & insect, Asks the Chinese for military aid
                          to defense insects from India, and takes a loan
                          from the American to buy one more mug of beer.