Red

 

By Darkangel Rose

 

A/N: OOC Trigun twincest. Doesn't appeal to you, do not read any further.  Knives X Vashu, obviously.  Maybe a bit of Legato X Knives, or a dash of Vashu X Wolfwood.  We'll see how it turns out. Reviews are encouraged, worshipped, and appreciated.  So please do!

 

~~

Red.

Color of my heart, soul of my blood, an infinite crimson that reminds me of you.

The red of courage, hope, and so many roses.

Lost within this sea of desert that engulfs my heart.

 

I guess you wouldn't know, Vashu.

Wouldn't have noticed the hunger in my eyes when I saw you.

My beautiful slave of scarlet, waiting for my return like a puppy.

 

Oh, but to make you scream for me.

 

The most eternal heaven, an unnameable bliss so high beyond even me that 'nirvana' seems inadequate.

 

My beautiful scar of rouge.

 

I remember what it was like when I first loved you.

Back in the brighter days, upon the SEEDS ship, when I still knew you.

Back before the nightmares came, these endless voices always whispering whispering in my ear.

Back when you wanted me, and I you, and that was all that I needed.

 

But now I crave you so much more, Vashu, more than you could know.

I thought it would be enough once, to hold you close and smell you.  To stroke your silken gold hair.

But for such an eternity I have wanted you.  Wanted to get my hands on you, in a manner of speaking.

 

My elusive temptation.  A poisoned wine sweeter than the nectar of the gods, tainted the hue of an impassioned flame.

 

I guess you were afraid, Vashu.  Afraid of what we might become together, as one.

For we are one person, ripped so viciously in two by our mother's womb, half-souls wandering in search for our match.

But how could you, my other half, think it anyone but I?

 

My cerise mystery, always just an inch away from my grasp

 

Don't you see how it all fits?  We were meant to be together, and we should have never been separated.

I almost had you then, when your hair was still a waterfall of sunlight, before she violated your mind with her twisted morals.

That meddling bitch I dealt with so skillfully.  And yet you cried, Vashu, you *cried*!

I did it all for your good.  Couldn't you see I was thinking of you?  Thinking of our future, our potential? 

Would you have me believe you did not feel the way I did that first time we kissed?

 

Damask siren of my steel heart.

 

You do not see the way I shudder now, so sensitive beneath your touch.  I feel every whispering second of contact, your flawless skin brushing mine carelessly.  Unconsciously I arch toward your touch as you wrap the bandages around my chest, biting your lip in concentration.

 

My carmine angel.

 

“What?” you ask quietly, pausing in your ministrations.

I look up, startled.  Your eyes are a dark forest green, a shade they become only when you are worried.

“I didn’t say anything.” I whisper, breath catching slightly as you stare at me so intently, so singularly, as if I were the only person worth seeing in this world.

“Yes you did,” you insist, obviously repeating the words within your skull.  I feel my hand twitch slightly, heart racing in fear.

 

I’m afraid of you, Vashu.  Me.  Afraid.  The cold-hearted, ‘fearless’ Knives.

 

Afraid.

 

And you are but an unknowing Jezebel, bringing me trembling to my knees.

“My charmin’ angel?” you ask, small grin splitting through the intensity on your features.

“Carmine” I admit, cheeks flushing to that hue, “I said ‘My carmine angel’”

 

You laugh.  It’s derisive, and I flinch.  You have such power over me, brother, such power you cannot even begin to know.

 

“My ivory twin” you pronounce, tracing a finger lightly up my spine.  I shiver as you entangle your fingers with the small white curls at the base of my neck.

“Duck fuzz,” you whisper, stroking the curls gently.  And so I turn, and my lips meet yours for just a second, just a whisper of the sensation of warmth and silky skin.  But you tense, and pull away.

“Knives, you know I love you.” You say, more clearly this time, yet still you back away, “Knives, you know I do.”

“Then why do you run away?” I choke, throat constricting in an odd way.  My eyes feel like acid.

“I love you, Knives,” you continue, ignoring me, “Because you are my brother.  And I love you ... as my brother.” you finish, punctuating the words with meaning.  You tie the bandage a little too tightly, but the pain feels soothing to me.

“Vashu...”

“Do not call me that.” you hiss, eyes flashing, manner changing completely in an instant. “You don’t deserve to call me that after all you’ve done.”

Your eyes are as hollow as the night sky, and there is a numb irony in the way you are smiling.

 

“You killed him Knives, and that I will never forgive.”