I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row.
I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel homes on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of video production. I translate ethnic slurs on Indian scientists, I write award-winning research papers, I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I try to tread water for three days in a row.
I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.
I try to woo women with my sensuous and godlike humor, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, but I can't cook Thirty-Minute, or Brownies in twenty minutes. I am not an expert in stucco, but a veteran in love, and a possible outlaw in Peru.
Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello, I was scouted by the Mets, I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after school, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.
Using only some under-table payments, I once single-handedly defended a small school in Roorkee from a horde of ferocious clerks. My computer plays amazing music, I encourage scouting of all good looking women, and I am the subject of numerous rejections. When I'm bored, I build large programs on my computer. I enjoy urban hang gliding. Periodically, after work, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.
I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. I bat 400. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children trust me.
I am an realist videographer, an abstract analyst, and a caring bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of thinking. I do perspire some times. I am a public author, but I don't receive fan mail. I have never been caller number nine and have yet to win the weekend passes. Twenty years ago I toured New Jersey as a scientist at Bell labs. I chess at 2200. My deft paper arrangements have driven my family nuts. But most children trust me.
I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me.
I can answer nitpicks with small moving issues with deadly accuracy. I once read HTML explained by Microsoft press in one day and still had time to refurbish my home work desk that evening. I know the exact location of every computer wire in the comp USA. I have performed several covert operations for the CIO. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in India, I successfully negotiated with a group of clerks who had seized a small school. The laws of bureaucratic wisdom do not apply to me.
I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prizewinning clams. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis.
I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in Internet surfing. Recently I discovered the meaning of life but for who lit the big bang match. I can't make even 1 course meals using even the full kitchen. I breed potentially prizewinning essays. I have won North American bridge championship at Las Vegas, stood up to visiting Petrosian, and survived fencing and sky-diving. I have played the boss of CIO (Campus India Organization), disc jockey at WRUR, and I have spoken with his supreme highness, Dr. Jerome Feldman.
But I have not yet gone to college.
But I have even taught a university with no results..