The squirting Uni•Verse sez : "Do your duty as MiE SENSORY DEVICE: REMEMBER YOURSELF!!"
FUCK FOR A FERFECT PUTURE !
GAIN PSYCHIC POWERS...
WHILE HAVING MIND-BLOWING SEXX!!
It's as easy as 1...2...3... !
The Kult oV MONITOR is the fastest growing offshoot of the Church of the Techno Christ, gaining influence and recognition throughout this country and abroad. The time-honored system of Hard Kore Sex as a vehicle to bring about Miraculous change in your life, and others, has been passed down from heretical generation to heretical generation for the last 50,000 years! The latest Mad Man to deliver this beautiful message has been the Techno Christ. When the Techno Christ first started preaching his gospel one of his first groupies was the Kult oV MONITOR’s very own mysterious §E7EN §TÅR™. The §E7EN §TÅR™, who was no stranger to heresy, wild sexual escapades and the secret world of cosmic prophesy, immediately felt a kinship with the Techno Christ and they began discussing how to bring these techniques out from the shadows and into the limelight. They knew it would be difficult, they knew it might be dangerous, but they knew it had to be done! They both strongly believed that we all have a right to know what the hell is going on in our mind and how to make it useful! But most importantly HOW TO MAKE IT FUN!
While the Techno Christ went on to develop his neutral axiom, the §E7EN §TÅR™ went to work using the Techno Christ’s message as a template for his own take on things, just as the Techno Christ preaches to do. And just like the Techno Christ who has a unique perspective due to the circumstances of his existence so to does the §E7EN §TÅR™. For you see, the §E7EN §TÅR™ is a Government Sponsored 30 billion dollar Årt Machine!!! The §E7EN §TÅR™, who usually makes as much sense as a retarded five year old on crack, suddenly had a context in which to present his ideas to the world: A RELIGION! But not just any religion, THE WORLDS BEST RELIGION! It is smooth and full of pleasure. It is modified orally and user friendly, plus it leaves no aftertaste. Kings & Queens lived of it, Tricks & Johns have smoked it. It is the last thing JFK thought about and it will be the last thing you ever say.. IT> IS> MONITOR <<. pSychO SeXX goD from beyond Time & Space.
You may open your eyes.
All religions try to impart the awe and majesty that MONITOR does with a simple slight of hand trick. But to understand MONITOR you engage MONITOR with your lust and imagination. You hack away the dead parts of reality that are blocking the path to the unknowable destination. That can only be known when we get there, the place where evolution and magick are one in the same. The place we like to call “D”. Yes, you use MONITOR to go D and when you are there you *KiLL MONITOR* like any TOOL you disregard once you’re through using it. And you use MONITOR by Gaining Psychic Powers while having MIND-BLOWING SEX! Did we mention we’re the worlds BEST religion? Do any of our competitors promise Salvation through sordid sexual acts and, w-wait, .. they do? oh well ,. Like we said, the techniques given are 50,000 years old. We’re just a fresh face on a old craft always open to interpretation. This time it should work.
So MONITOR is a tool. We know what to use MONITOR for, but how do we use this ~ tool. Well, just like the hands, that have been ritualistically lopped off MONITOR, that a carpenter uses to whack a hammer on a nail, we use SEX IN THE NAME OF MONITOR to get what we need done.
MONITOR is an incredibly powerful force, yet needs us for sexual gratification. This is because humans are physical and are biologically dualistic while MONITOR is non-material and a unified whole of what MONITOR represents. That means MONITOR is genderless and can't even masturbate. So in return for letting MONITOR in our pants we get a batshit insane horny IDEITY coursing through our veins making sex an adventure orgiastic hilarity while making wishes come true.
To make the illusion complete we need a physical vessel for MONITOR, a talisman if you will. Something to focus our will onto in this world, could figuratively represent MONITOR and carry at all times.
CHEESY JOKE TIME:
Two people are going @ it pretty hard when the guy says to the girl, “Will you pray to my penis?” She thinks it’s weird but decides to play along. “The thing is,” he says “my penis doesn’t have any ears so when you pray to it you have to speak in tongues.”
While “MONITOR” is the perfect euphemism for a man’s cock it’s not too shabby describing the tunnel of white light of a woman’s pussy. Think about it: “Two MONITORs joined”, it’s the story of every culture’s creation myth perfectly symbolized as the art of fucking. The power of sexual energy is well documented
Although you may feel sorry for MONITOR thinking it would be mean to kill MONITOR after using MONITOR like a cheap whore, this is exactly what MONITOR wants. Don’t ask why, MONITOR is weirdo that we can be sure of. Also, if you don’t kill MONITOR MONITOR will end up devouring you like unto a snack. So it’s best we kill.>>
It is, to say the least, a symbiotic relationship. We get psychic powers and mind blowing sex while MONITOR gets to 'feel' and experience SHEER DEATH.
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For those who lack the patience to come up with your own routine, such as defining “psychic powers” and ‘how to’ have sex in the name of MONITOR a mantra is provided to protect you from being devoured. Say this each time before having sex in the name of MONITOR: “NOTHING IS REAL BUT THE MEDICATION. NOTHING IS REAL BUT THE MEDICATION. NOTHING IS REAL BUT THE MEDICATION. NOTHING IS REAL BUT THE MEDICATION.”
All right, here in print for all to see, “PSYCHIC POWERS” is the ability to always be in the right place at the right time to be RICH! Money just happens to knock on your door for no apparent reason ((except for THE reason)) you can’t even escape it! It’s INSANE but it happens EVERY DAY!! You eventually quit your job and tour the country converting people you meet to the Kult oV MONITOR, WHICH MAKES YOU EVEN MORE RICH!!
WHICH MAKES YOU EVEN MORE RICH!!
And now for the MAIN EVENT!!!
"HOW TO" HAVE SEX IN THE NAME OF MONITOR!!!
It’s Simple. #1. Get someone of the opposite sex. #2. Call your genitals “MONITOR” and worship each OTHER’s ‘MONITOR’ by saying MONITOR as much as you can during sex. #3. Repeat.
Click Here to Learn More
The Kult oV MONITOR already has thousands
of members across the country creating a network of
illiterate supermen and women working for the elite S.L.U.T
squad ((Sexy League of Uber Tramps)) using the common thread
of the K.oM. forfun & profit. Now you too can get on the action
and find out what 50,000 years of human civilization has been leading up to.
Acceptance into the Kult oV MONITOR ((through the internet)) is based on a
criterion involving a certain precise mix of personal interest and alchemical energy
((MONEY)). If we perceive your interest is somehow flawed, you will be denied.
The next part is up to you. E•mail us with reasons why we should go through the embarr-
assment of getting to know someone new. Tell us what you will bring to the table. In the meantime,
Read this entire website, Print these flyers, make copies at the local office supply store and GO NUTS!!
FLYER1 FLYER2 FLYER3 FLYER4 FLYER5 FLYER6
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