"You're losing your mind, Nicki."
28th November 2005


Nicolas de Lenfant::
When left to his own ends he’d spent the duration of a day searching this huge place for her. But this place seemed unending and there seemed no escape, rooms opened to more rooms and after a few long hours of wandering he’d grown tired and more forlorn (if that were possible) and chosen a random place to rest, finally. Settling in this unrecognisable room under a blanket of ebony feathers not those that adorned the bed that he curled up behind. The quiet giving him adequate time to morn a little more before drifting off once again exhausted.

Kuja Terra Fina Esstariol::
*He was lying on the bed for a time before he plucks one of those feathers for a wake up call. He chose a nice large one, running the bristles against his face, wondering when he last washed them. Things were so calm these days that he felt a little off balance with himself. He felt like breaking something for the sake of not breaking something in physical terms less than one of his little captives. Where were all those angry and frustrated nights? Did becoming a god really bring an end to all his anxiety? Resolving the thought he was paying a visit to Nicki, quiet eyes awaiting entertainment. “So you going to play for me again? Though now that I’ve seen you whore your talents around, it’s not so special.”

Nicolas de Lenfant::
He’d flinch and as if programmed to do so; half rose as if ready to strike the other before everything once again registered in his mind. The gentle tone had once again disappeared and it made Nicolas wonder exactly what the other wanted, what he was capable of today. His voice rose in an almost melodic laugh at the other’s words. Was he saying he wanted Nicolas to play or no? Of course he’d have to be more specific as to what, now.. And Nicki had more pressing worries now. –Where is she?- Was that his voice? No. But he till felt the shame well up inside. He’d play for eternity for the other if their business could be done. Send her away and I’ll whore whatever sounds you wish to you..

Kuja Terra Fina Esstariol::
*As Nicki settled back down, his fingers started to play with his dark tresses. Combing upwards, he listens once more to Nicki’s thoughts as the other didn’t speak. He could probably change Nicki’s thoughts around, but there’s a point where too much power can be boring. Instead he probes and twists the questioning word “Where” to “Who”. Little by little he’ll meld him into something nobody wants to get to know at all where Kuja will be the only one with nurturing eyes. The only one who cares. The one to be his father. A little flame lights on the tip of his finger as he starts to run the length of the feather above it, scorching but not destroying. “If not the violin, why not your voice then? Speak to me, Nicki, tell me anything, I’ll forever be your comforting ear.”

Nicolas de Lenfant::
As if by the other’s beckoning along his voice rang out softly, “Who.. ?” his brow furrowing immediately he shook his head lightly and massaged his temples. That wasn’t right, not the right question, what had he wanted to know? Who had he been asking about? He looked to the other in confusion and then a sad certainty overwhelmed him a sudden sense of absolute loss. He shrieked and stumbled away from the soft petting of the other, tearing at his hair and stumbling backwards to fall on his bottom and rock a little arms wrapped about himself. Something was missing, something very important. “Who is she?” His question was desperate now, to the other.

Kuja Terra Fina Esstariol::
*Like the flame at his finger, his eyes beamed. The light went out and the burnt feather crumbled into ashes at his closing hand. Rising up, a slow pace, enjoying the site of his little pet rocking himself for comfort. What charms he worked, he thought as he kneeled down before the other, gentle hands weaved to brace against Nicki’s soft cheeks, to make him see the sincerity and concern written all over. “Nicki… you’re losing your mind… please don’t distress yourself so, I will always be here for you, I’ll help you through these hard times and never give up on you.” –I love you- he sends, untangling Nicki’s arms as he holds him tightly. Before Skye, before Lestat, Kuja was in his eyes, and he made him not so much remember but feel those memories from so long ago.*

Nicolas de Lenfant::
His rocking ceased at the touch of hands to his cheeks and he looked up at the other finally expression a mix of confusion and concern. Losing his mind? He wanted to protest on one end, but the other let him sob against him in acceptance to these ‘facts’ and he wondered if this were true how long had it been happening? It felt like going mad, all of this. He knew Kuja had been there and then there had been other things that seemed like dreams. Was he waking up? He clung to the other now lightly as his mind asked a million different questions at once. “..love you..” he echoed the words which hadn’t been spoken and peered around, was this home?