Any Questions?

"Yes Katrina?" I asked the girl whose hand shot up in the air.

"Why didn't you do anything? I would've run right to my parents and got a lawyer on his ass." The semi-circle of girls around me laughed at her comment, radical feminism in it's purest form.

"Well, for starters, I was only thirteen. Second, I didn't have any parents at the time, I was living with my grandmother." Nana, I loved her sooo much. Still surviving at a nursing home, I had good feelings she'd always be around. She had to, she and I were the only ones left making up the stump of our family tree.

"How could I have told her? In her time, girls were still wearing skirts down to their ankles. So I chose to do nothing.. except that did it for me. The hitting and swearing I could tolerate; maybe after time the drinking too. But as soon as the next day, I refused to let Justin see me again. It's funny.. he didn't even know where I lived, thank God." I finished.

"And I've never seen him since, actually.."

"Weren't you afraid of getting pregnant ?" another girl asked.

"He raped me; it wasn't as if I wanted to have sex." I reminded her.

"I didn't have time to think about protection. Fortunately, I didn't even start my period until I was fourteen. Something for you to imagine for next time- someone having sex before getting their period. Any more questions?" The silence that followed was good enough of an answer for me. I slid off the hardened stool that'd been putting my butt to sleep for the last hour or so and looked over at Sarah, catching her wiping tears out the corners of her eyes.

"Are you ok?" I asked her, slightly amused. I would've figured I'd be the one who'd have gotten emotional here, not her. "You're not getting hormonal on me already, are you?"

"No.. I'm just so happy that you are doing this."

"Well, they're nice girls." I smiled at the exiting group of teenagers. "God forbid it ever happen to any of them."

Twice a week, I was part of a high school program talking to girls about harrassment and date rape. It was a two way street: I hoped some of them actually listened and didn't make the same mistakes I had, and in turn it made the experience bearable for me. It was actually my parents' idea - as soon as they found out last year how many long years I'd been holding it in, they introduced me to the director of the program. Although against the whole idea at first, I was very happy to be a part of the program now.

"So, where do you want to go for lunch," I started to ask Sarah when I noticed a quiet girl standing in the corner, looking over at me with sad, yet curious, eyes.

"Just a minute," I said. Sarah, looking in the direction I headed, understood. She sat back down in her seat in the back She was great, coming to all these sessions to support me since we talked in the pawn shop. I know it hadn't been the best of times for her either back then.. but she had stuck through it, my best friend. I loved and worshipped her for it.

"Hi Katie," I approached the only freshman in the group.

"Hi Maggie." She said shyly. "I wanted to ask you a question.."

"Sure, go for it." I sat on the floor in front of her so she wouldn't have to look up at me.

"Weren't you scared?" she kneeled next to me.

"Of course. I stayed up very late at night crying to myself to a sleep that I would never get for a few months."

"I mean, when he was.. you know." She shifted her weight uncomfortably.

"When he was actually raping me?" I asked. She nodded.

"Absolutely. His hands were icy cold, making my skin cover with goose bumps. The enraged look in his eyes made me want to shrivel away into a corner.." This was always the hardest part, one-to-one explanations. "I seriously thought he was going to kill me. Your virginity is very special to you; don't EVER let anyone take it away from you. Don't let someone else take your power away like that.. Do you know what I mean?"

"Sex is fine if you love a person," I glanced over at Sarah and smiled. "But there is a difference between making love and being harrassed. There was no love in my case."

"Ok," Katie said quietly. "I don't think I need to worry about that, but thanks for sharing with me."

With that, she jumped up and walked out.

"She's lucky," I murmured, standing up. Sarah overheard me as she walked over.

"So are you," she reminded me, handing over my coat.

"Thanks," I took it from her.

"You know, it's cases like her that make me think.." I smiled sadly.

"How so?" She cocked her head towards me, her face showing sympathy.

"Well.. look at her life. Her only frustrations are centered around not having Christmas break any more. All she has to be embarrassed about is feeling awkward in gym class because she needs to wear a sports bra. Sometimes, girls like her just think 'Gee, that's too bad. Sucks to be you. At least it won't ever happen to me.' But it does happen.. too damn much."

"We all do our best. You're doing your part to help prevent that."

"I just wish I could do more.."

"You're not a miracle-worker," Sarah pointed out.

"How did you get so smart?" I asked her, grinning. "Maybe I should switch from education to cosmetology like you."

"No, don't you dare! You're so good with kids, it'd be a crime." Sarah joked back. "So, where do you want to go to eat?"

"So tell, me, how did it happen?" I demanded, peering at Sarah across the diner table over my menu.

"Well, first Mark took off his clothes, and I-"

"No!" I interrupted, laughing. "I mean, how did Mark propose to you?" I reached out my hand. She placed hers palm down in it and I examined her engagement ring. To quote the popular slang, what a rock.

"Oh, it was beautiful," Sarah's eyes clouded over in mock melodrama. "We were just sitting around watching that stupid wrestling show at his apartment that he's so darn addicted to."

"Well, I'm sure that's the first thing you'll change about him when you get your chance."

"Absolutely," Sarah returned my grin. "During a commercial, I got up and checked my home-pregnancy test. After nearly collaspsing on the floor at the results, I ran out into the living room screaming and crying at the same time. He didn't have a clue as to what I was talking about, but when he did, he proposed to me right there."

"During a wrestling match commercial?" I laughed. "That's Mark for ya.. At least he didn't do it in a strip-joint."

"No, I should be so grateful." Sarah rolled her eyes, then narrowed them on my face.

"So.." She leaned towards me slightly.

Uh-oh, I recognized that certain tone of voice she used. My mind echoed- gossip alert! Please don't let her try to fix me up again..

"You know," she started. Ahh! Stop!

"When we get married, you'll need a date to the wedding. Mark has a younger brother.." I'm not listening to this!! Lalalalalalala..

"I'm ok." I said quickly.

"No.. it's not ok." Sarah leaned forwards a little more, looking concerned. "I'm worried about you Maggie. You haven't gone out with anyone (nice of her to enunciate that word) since Justin- that's just not healthy."

"I'm really ok," I assured her. How could I explain that companionship, while a major life-shaping event for her, so now she was dependent on her significant other, just didn't have a place in my life?

"I'm just waiting for the right person." I repeated my most common answer to the 'Are you some kinda freak?' question people liked to ask me quite frequently.

"Besides, I'm not some old shrew that my parents can't wait to marry me off to some guy.."

"Maggie.. how long are you planning on waiting? Mark's brother is such a sweetie, I'm sure you'd like him a lot."

"Sarah, may I remind you of the last time you and I had our eyes on a set of brothers?" My eyes twinkled mischieviously.

"Oh, God, not the Hansons," Sarah moaned. "Here we go 'round again."

"My point exactly." I giggled. "So there."

"Very mature, Maggie." I stuck my tongue out at her.

"Anyway," Sarah continued. "If I remember correctly, you, like every other girl in this whole freakin' country had her eyes plastered on Taylor.."

"Well, almost. I liked Tay before they became famous, then stopped liking him the more famous they got." I reminded her. Momentarily interrupting our reminiscing (God, even that word makes me feel old), our waitress brought our drinks over towards us. I unwrapped my straw and took a sip of my chocolate shake.

"Are you ladies ready to order?" Marj, her nametag informed us, asked. She poised a small white pad of paper in front of her, ready to pounce with the mention of our orders. No pressure, really..

"Yup," I replied. I looked at Sarah, who nodded slightly in my direction. Female language translation: you order first.

"I'll take a 'half-pounder', with lettuce and tomatoes." I avoided looking at Sarah's face, imagining her horror.

"With extra mayo. Light mayo if you have it." I gave in a little, just for my best friend.

"I'll take the turkey sandwich, plain. And carrot sticks instead of fries. " Sarah said meekly, avoiding eye contact with me. I tried not to giggle, my shoulders trembling. Marj, probably thinking we were mental, took our menus and replied,

"That'll be about twenty minutes."

"You're terrible! Absolutely terrible." Sarah threw her napkin at me as I burst out laughing.

"What?" I defended myself. "I have a healthy appetitie."

"Healthy? Half a pound of meat?" Sarah gave me the once-over inspection.

"You're not bullemic, are you?" she asked, still examining me.

"You're so tiny."

"Of course not. I'm an aerobics bimbo, remember?" I flexed my biceps for her.

"That's great," Sarah rolled her eyes again, but smiled. "How are classes going?"

"Pretty darn good. Last semester we had an all-time high membership at the health club." I referred to where I worked.

"All that cheer-leading finally paid off?" Sarah joked. We were both on the squad all four years of high school.

"Hey, I get my exercise, you get yours," I pointed to her belly. "I know the lecture about where those things come from."

Sarah's only response was rolling her eyes.. again.

"Careful," I noted. "If you keep doing that, they may fall outta the back of your head."

With that comment, Sarah pretended to bang her head on the table between us.

"I give up." She said in an exasperated tone. I'd take a bullet any day for that girl.