The Classics

Welcome to the new milenium. Sitting around our nineteen-inch window overlooking New York's crowded streets, appearing like any normal family, we were sitting watching the infamous 'ball drop' on television. But we weren't exactly a typical family, and this certainly wasn't a typical New Year's Eve: the millisecond the time clicked to 12:00am, 01/01/00, pandemonium erupted. Worldwide networked systems crashed: people lost electricity, phones, water, gas, and most of all control. Screams were heard from haulted elevators that refused to move, their timing circuits unable to read '00.' Phone and internet access ceased; the wired phone systems collaspsed. Without heat, millions froze. Stores, unable to control the errors in their computerized registers, closed; those careless to think ahead starved. Ravaged religious riots escapated on continent to continent as people thought the end was truly here, mourning the rising number of the dead, dying, and suffering that was to come as the Apocalyspe devoured us all..

Well, not really. But our toaster, ancient from the 1960's, stopped working. Close enough?

Maybe I should start things out easier, without all the drama. No riots escapated into the quiet streets of Tulsa, except for what I call the occasional big city scuff-ups. It's a nice town; I've lived here all my life. Not in this house, but nevertheless, "Good Ol' Tulsa" truly was home. Maybe that's why I was such a loser: nineteen years old, commuting to college and still living at home. My parents, Gerald and Karen, fell completely into the benevolent dictator category wonderfully except for one factor: biology. Stated bluntly, I'm adopted. But who cared? They loved me, I loved them, and I hate Biology (it's an over-rated major anyway).

I didn't remember much of my 'real' parents, for they died in a car accident when I was younger. Show me a four-year old who can remember explicit details of her parents' personalities, and I might lighten up on the sarcasm.

Might..

While I'm on that subject, I'll state the obvious: I'm a very sarcastic person. I pride myself on it. Hardened by a somewhat abnormal childhood and extremely abnormal personality, my tone of voice and selection of words often reflected both. Maybe my sharp tongue was what made guys look in the other direction; I hadn't had a boyfriend since I was thirteen, my only one. Oh, sure, I'd developed crushes on guys all throughout high school, but I always remained the girl in the group who was always single.. you know, the coat holder, the one whose house all your friends claimed they were sleeping over at when they were really making out with their boyfriends. It didn't help that all my friends had long-term relationships. But it didn't matter; I took care of myself. I managed to assure myself I didn't need anyone else. I had friends for company, parents (for the time being) for financial support, and I was going to school. Life was good. What more could I ever need?

Well.. back to the toaster. It's funny; that little broken-down appliance started the whole fiasco.

"Bye Mom and Dad!" I called, sliding my winter coat over my arms. I tucked the silver toaster, still shiny after years of abuse from me, not being much of a morning person. It was more of a personal relic to my parents than of actual use, but nonetheless I liked toast. It was part of my staple breakfast, something I couldn't function without. So you could understand why it was important I go out and buy a new one, right?

"Ok, thanks Maggie. Are you going to your seminar today?" Karen appeared in the front door, wrapped in her bathrobe.

"No, the kids are still on vacation now. I start next Tuesday. I'll be back after I get the toaster." I held up the non-functional one to her. "Should be about four."

"Ok, have fun."

"Well, much more fun than pouring out my life to high school kids. I'm the one who needed the vacation." I grinned and gave a small wave of my hand. Shaking her head, Karen turned and shut the door.

"Brr.." I hunched my shoulders up and tucked my head closer to my body as I walked down the front sidewalk. With my fingers tingling from the cold, I caught the right key and opened my car door. I loved my car, a 1992 Celebrity. It was so obnoxious: awkwardly huge, rusty, and falling apart- the perfect reflection of my college-student salary. But it was mine. Although Karen and Gerald thought it devalued our property when I parked it in front of our house, it was my baby, whom I'd affectionately referred to as 'Louise.' She was my means of escape whenever I deemed necessary.

"Please start, please start.." I prayed I wouldn't have another incident like yesterday morning. I had intended on getting a new toaster as a New Year's Eve present for my parents then, but my stubborn old car had refused to start. Fortunately, it roared to life right away this time.

"Good girl.." So how long has it been since I've had friends that I talk to my car?

"You're telling me it's how much?" I asked the guy at the pawn shop.

"Two-hundred fifty dollars." The large, and somewhat hairy I couldn't help noticing, man repeated. He crossed his enormous forearms in front of his chest and frowned, as if to say 'No bargining.'

"But it's just a toaster."

"It's a classic. Last one I have." Oh, forgive me for being so ignorant- that was it! A classic.. I see.

"Well, it's not like it's rare." I held up our toaster, almost identical to the one he was trying to jip me off with. I could only guess that he had at least a hundred or so of those 'classics' stashed in the back, putting a replacement in place of each one that was sold.

"Hey, that's a nice-looking one.." Hmm.. care to make a deal, Troll-man?

"Yeah, I heard it was a classic." Oops. Darn that sarcasm. The look on the guy's face showed he didn't appreciate my comment.

"What are you asking for it?"

"Oh, it's a sentimental piece.. been in the family for years." I pretended to think. "I couldn't give it up for anything less of two hundred."

Haha, take that Hairy. But would he fall for it?

"Ok, but only for a trade-in."

Yes! I thought. I couldn't believe he'd fallen for it, especially with all his post-graduate work in the electronic field (not). And it wasn't like I'd tell him that it didn't work though. I could only pray that the one I wanted did.

"And no sell backs. All deals final."

Ahh, the secret catch of swindling. Well, wasting fifty dollars wasn't nearly as bad as wasting two hundred fifty dollars.

"All right." I said sweetly, reaching into my back pocket for my wallet. "Could I get a box for it though?"

It's not extra, you cheap-skate. Grumbling slightly, the ox-of-a-man sauntered into the back room of the pawn shop to find a box. I smiled triumphantly, a slight victory for today. If I didn't love Louise so much, I could go haggle for a used car now; I felt that good.

"Maggie?? Oh, my god is that really you!?" I whirled around at the mention of my name.

"Holy shit.." I mumbled.

"Sarah?" I hadn't seen her since her graduation party last summer.

"Mags!!" She screamed out my old nickname that only she could call me. Just for the hell of it, I screamed along with her and wrapped her up in a hug.

"Oww- not so tight there Mags," Sarah said. She stepped away from me and my eyes widened at the bulge of her mid-section. Even though slightly larger, she looked even more beautiful.

"Sarah, you're not-" I caught my sentence. For once, even I was speechless. Sarah nodded, too excited to speak. I saw a new happiness I'd never seen in her, as well as pride, swelled up in her blue eyes as she whispered,

"It's a little girl."

"Ahh! Congradulations! That's so awesome.. So who's the father?" I joked, embracing her again, making a conscience effort to be a little gentler.

"Oh, silly.." Sarah mused. "It's Mark."

"Mark your cousin? Sarah, I had no idea.." I laughed at my terrible joke.

"No! God, you're terrible. Mark my fiancee."

"You're engaged too!?" I hugged her again.

Wow.

"Yup." Sarah laughed at my outpour of emotions. "He proposed to me a few months ago, when I found out I was pregnant.."

"That's so great." I was glad Mark was settling down. He didn't strike me as much of a family man, but he did love Sarah; that was obvious to anyone in the room with them. They'd been together, on and off, for the last few years. It'd seemed like forever.. now was as good a time as any for them to get serious.

"What are you doing here?" Sarah changed the subject.

"Bargining for a toaster. The impact of the new milenium hit us really hard. Ooh.." I teased. "You?"

"I saw some God-awful Celebrity parked outside.. There's probably only one left in Tulsa." I grinned. "I can't believe you still have that car Maggie."

"What can I say, I love 'the classics.' "