Gibbs kept his eyes focused on his own reflection staring back at him from the dark window.  Rain continued, unabated.  It seemed some how fitting that the sky should be mourning Kate's death.  That it would cry when he couldn't.

"Do you think Mohamed Esfiri killed Kate?"  Gibbs asked quietly unable to look at Tony.  He could almost feel Tony hesitate to answer.
        
"I think it's possible."  

Gibbs tried not to flinch.  Everyone seemed hell bent on proving him wrong about Ari, on confirming that rat bastard's innocence when Gibbs knew in his heart and soul Ari was their shooter.  He'd hoped Tony had more faith, that his lover would trust his judgment on this.

"Someone went to a lot of work to make it look like Esfiri was our sniper, but I don't think he was."

Gibbs blinked.  He turned to look at Tony.  Blue eyes met green searching.  "Why?"  It was contrary of him but he didn't want this to be just some show of faith in him.  He wanted Tony to confirm his own belief.

Tony sighed softly.  "It doesn't add up."

"What doesn't?"

"I think we can agree that McGee being alive is as much a matter of dumb luck and timing as anything else.  But there's only one reason we didn't die on that roof right along with Kate."  Tony bit his lip.  "She was the intended target…and it was personal."

Playing the devil's advocate, Gibbs asked, "Maybe he lost his nerve or ran out of time."

"If he managed the first shot, he had more than enough nerve to make two more."  Tony snorted; jade green eyes awash with too many emotions for Gibbs to identify all of them.  "And there was more than enough time for him to take out all three of us.  We were sitting ducks."

Gibbs nodded.  He'd thought the same thing but hadn't said so.  He was still ashamed of his reaction time.  If he'd been faster, more alert, better prepared…if this, if that…it changed nothing.  Kate was still dead and he'd have to learn to live with that.

"Shots fired at Abby's lab weren't random either."  Tony shook his head.  "It was too personal for that.  No way that was the act of some barely old enough to shave wanna-be bad ass raised in Ohio."  Tony smiled grimly.  "If Esfiri was looking to make a statement or do some damage, he would have been taking shots at people leaving through the front door."

"Abby's lab had the evidence so maybe it was an attempt to slow us down, keep us from finding him."

"He didn't police his brass on purpose, Boss."  Tony countered calmly.  "Doesn't wash that he'd suddenly worry we'd figured out who he was.  And he'd have to know it was in her lab and that she was the one working on it.  Not like there's a sign on the building pointing to it."

"He could have had enough information on my team to know where to look."

"Could have," Tony agreed.  "But that again suggests something personal."  Tony held up his hands as though balancing a scale.  "And the only one with a personal grudge was Ari."

Gibbs nodded.  "Anything else?"

Tony's jaw tightened.  "The shots fired at your car were all aimed at the passenger side."

Gibbs frowned.  He didn't see the immediate significance of that.  

"If he really wanted to get away he'd have spread his shots."  Tony shrugged one shoulder stiffly.  "He'd have made damn sure to take out both you and the director."

Gibbs gave Tony a searching look.  There was more emotion present than he expected.  His eyes narrowed.  "You're pissed about that?"

"I'm glad you had back up."  Tony looked away, the muscle in his jaw flexing.  "Just not sure she was the best choice."

"There wasn't anyone else."  Gibbs wasn't defending himself, he was just stating the facts.  "You were tailing Ziva.  McGee was here to protect Abby and help work the case."

"There are other agents, Gibbs." Tony cocked his head to one side.  "Qualified field agents."

"She is qualified."

"No, she <b>was </b>qualified."  Tony placed a clear emphasis on the past tense.  "You don't know if she's even passed shooting range test in the last year, much less anything about her ability to perform in the field."

Gibbs hated to admit Tony was right.  He'd worked with Jen Sheppard.  Had trained her and assumed she was still field ready.  It was an assumption he should not have made. But he hadn't wanted to risk any other members of his team.  He had needed to keep them as safe as possible.  Picking Sheppard had been a last minute decision, but not a careless one.

"I needed for her to believe me about Ari."  He wasn't going to be able to go after him otherwise.

"Yeah, I know."  Tony reached out to touch him before aborting the move much to Gibbs' disappointment.  They were still at the office, albeit they were alone for the moment.  There was no telling how long they'd have the bull pen to themselves and they weren't completely out of view of the surveillance cameras.

Tony smiled wryly.  "And you still need her to believe you."

"Yeah."  Gibbs didn't quite snarl but he wanted to.  It was so damn frustrating.  Sheppard was ready to write Kate's murder off as solved, her killer shot by Gibbs.  And she wasn't going to trust his gut the way his team did.  

Working up the history and details on Esfiri, Gibbs knew his team was just being thorough; good investigators like he'd trained them to be.  Tony had already shown they didn't believe him to be the killer any more than Gibbs did.  But he doubted Sheppard would even give his team the benefit of the doubt.  She was more likely to assume they followed his lead, or were just backing him up if they started pushing to keep going after Ari.  It was disappointing that she didn't have more faith in him or them.  They wouldn't be on his team if they weren't the best out there.  

But hell, he couldn't really blame her either.  They hadn't seen each other in years.  It was possible she wasn't making the same assumptions about his team's ability that Gibbs had made about hers.    

"Do you trust Ziva?"  Gibbs asked suddenly.

Tony arched an eyebrow.  "Not that many people I do trust, Boss."  

Gibbs nodded, accepting that as the simple statement of fact that it was.  If Tony trusted more people, the office wouldn't be so convinced he was as straight as an arrow or that he was some spoiled, rich kid.  He came by his distrust honestly.  Gibbs didn't blame him for it.  

"Can we trust her?"  

"She said she was Ari's handler.  But she gave him the information he needed to get a handle on us."  Tony took a deep breath, eyes focusing on the window.  Gibbs could almost see the wheels in his mind turning as he worked through his answer.  

Tony shook his head slightly.  "Her divulging our personal information doesn't really mean anything because Fornell could have just as easily passed on the same details and probably did."  Tony grimaced.  "FBI dropped the ball on this one, but at least Fornell is willing to admit that.  Albeit grudgingly.  Which is a damn site more than I think you'll ever get from Ziva David."  

Gibbs had to agree with Tony's assessment.  Ms. David was very sure of herself with regard to Ari.  Maybe too sure.  Hell, Kate didn't kill him when she had the chance because she thought he had 'kind eyes'.  Ziva could have been just as easily fooled.  At least her being conned hadn't resulted in a shot to the head…yet.   

Kate had been a colleague, a member of his team, someone he should have been able to protect, someone he cared about.  Ziva…he didn't even really know her.  Wasn't even sure he should care.  But he didn't want her to be another victim of Ari either.

Tony ran a hand through his hair.  "Can we trust Ziva…probably.  Up to a point."  He made eye contact, expression uncertain.  "I'm just not sure where the point is."

Gibbs wasn't sure either. But he had a feeling he was going to find out.  He looked at the window again, unable to look at Tony.  "I have a plan."

He could see Tony's face reflected in the glass.  The younger man raised an eyebrow.  "I got a feeling I'm not going to like it."

Gibbs' lips curled in a wry smile.  He wasn't sure he liked it either.  But at this point, he didn't feel he had much choice.  "Ziva is the key to getting Ari."

"Figured that."

Gibbs blinked and turned to look at Tony. Tony chuckled softly. He shrugged and shifted his weight a little.  The stiffness with which he moved reminded Gibbs that it wasn't all that long ago Tony had damn near died, had been caught in an explosion, and spent more than one night out in the pouring rain.  He wanted to apologize for being so careless with the one person he valued above all others, for asking so much and expecting Tony to deliver, but Gibbs couldn't bring himself to do it.

"It was the whole reason you had me tail her.  I remember."  Tony sighed tiredly, one hand rising to rub at his eyes briefly.  "She knows how to contact him.  Passport and fake papers were proof of that.  She's got to have a number to reach him.  She's his ticket out of the country…no way he wouldn't take a call from her."

Tony's expression shifted into something hard.  "He's got her fooled…which means, once she's not useful anymore, she's a liability and she's toast."

Gibbs nodded.  That was his take on it too.  Although, he doubted he'd be able to convince her of that.  

He took a slow, deep breath.  "Ari still wants me dead."

"Not going to happen, Boss."

He smiled at Tony's quick, confident assurance.  His smile faded as quickly as it had appeared.  He hesitated for a second, bracing himself for Tony's response.  "I want to give him another chance at it."

"Excuse me?"  Tony stared at him.

"I'm going to be bait to draw him out."

"That's…pretty much what I thought you said."  Tony's tone was surprisingly calm.  

Gibbs had expected an explosion, one complete with yelling and hand gestures.  Tony just looked…resigned.  There were shutters in place in his eyes Gibbs had never seen before.  He reached out to touch Tony, uncaring of the cameras and possible consequences, but Tony stepped away.  

"You're planning on doing this thing solo."

It wasn't a question, but Gibbs answered anyway.  "Not exactly."

Tony snorted, his mouth forming a moue of distaste.  "Let me guess…Madam Director again then?"  That eerily calm tone still resonant in his voice.  

"No."  He couldn't, wouldn't use Sheppard.  As Tony had been so quick to point out, he really didn't know if she was qualified.  He wasn't going to make the same mistake twice.  And he really didn't want to give Ari any more chance of succeeding in killing him than necessary.  

"Who?"  

There is only a mild curiosity in Tony's voice, like he already knew the answer and was just waiting for confirmation.  And Gibbs hated this.  He'd rather have Tony rant and rave. Would rather he lash out at him than somehow manage to be miles away when he was really only just over an arms length from Gibbs.  

"Look…I know you're pissed-"

"Yeah, but you don't get why, do you?"  Tony shook his head.  

This conversation felt familiar.  He was sure he'd had it before with one of his ex-wives.  "I don't have time-"

"No you don't."  Tony squared his shoulders.  His gaze shifted to where Director Sheppard was coming down the stairs.  Gibbs wasn't even sure how he'd known she was there.  

Tony started to step away, but Gibbs grabbed his arm.  "We're not done."

Tony stiffened and looked down at his hand before traveling up the length of Gibbs' arm, the weight of his gaze clearly telling the former Marine to let go.  It was the first and only time he could remember Tony ever not welcoming his touch, not wanting him to linger.  Green eyes were still shuttered, his expression decidedly neutral.

"You don't have time."  

Gibbs nearly growled.  He didn't want to leave things like this between them.  He still wasn't sure what the hell he'd done wrong.  But he knew it had to have been him.  He just needed a chance to figure it out and make it right.   

"Later then."  It wasn't a request.

Something flashed in Tony's eyes.  Something Gibbs couldn't quite read.  "I hope so, Jethro."  It was little more than a whisper.

Gibbs gave him a sharp look.  He wasn't sure what that meant.  Was Tony saying he didn't want to settle this?  Was he that pissed?  Couldn't he see killing Ari was necessary?  Gibbs couldn't let that bastard live.  

The first time they'd met Ari he'd been content with threats and injuries.  The second time he'd escalated to killing Kate.  There was no telling what he might do in the future.  He couldn't risk leaving Ari out there to do more damage.  He'd never survive if it was Tony who was the target the next time.  Gibbs couldn't handle losing him.  Kate was bad enough.  

Tony's lips curled into a sad half smile.  He shook his head, an undercurrent of fond exasperation shading his voice when he spoke.  "We don't get the chance to settle this later it'll be because you're dead.  It won't be because I walked away or didn't get it, you dumb shit."  

Tony was the only person who'd ever been able to read him so well.  And other than Ducky, the only one who could get away with being so blunt.  But, Gibbs had to admit, blunt worked.  He finally began to understand Tony wasn't just angry, he was worried and maybe a little scared.    

"Be careful."  Tony directed quietly.  "Please."

"I will."  Gibbs promised.  There was too much at stake to be careless.

He wanted to say more, wanted to touch Tony in a more intimate fashion…a kiss, a hug, anything.  He wanted desperately to know his touch was still welcome, that he was still welcome. Needed assurance he'd get a chance to make it right.

Tony pointed his index finger at Gibbs, then made a fist and covered his heart with it.  Gibbs smiled, feeling immeasurable relief and repeated the gesture.  It wasn't traditional sign language for 'I love you' but it was close enough.  

"Go do what you need to, Boss."  Tony jerked his head toward Sheppard.  "We'll talk later."

Gibbs nodded.  He'd feel better about his plan, a lot more confident of success if it was Tony backing him up, but he just couldn't risk it. Couldn't risk him.  He'd just have to make do.  

He was going home to Tony when it was done, safe and sound, just like he promised.  He had too much to lose to not confront his nemesis.  And he had too much to live for to not survive his last encounter with Ari.   

"You okay, Tony?"

Tony looked over at McGee.  He didn't want to lie, and telling the truth seemed like a bad idea.  That left…silence.  He shrugged, stifling a wince as his muscles protested the movement.  With his body sending him little reminders like that it was hard to lose sight of everything that had happened in the last four days.  

Lord.  Tony sighed again.  Had it only been four days?  He mentally counted.  Day one had been back to work and a case complete with two dead sailors and a bomb in the car. Spending the night at the office, sleeping in a chair hadn't helped ease the lingering muscle aches.  Day two was spent stopping a terrorist attack and ended with Kate dieing on that damn roof.  Not really a good day, Tony decided.  Definitely not a good day.  Day three was trying to find that bastard Ari.  If he never had another stakeout in the rain it would be too soon.  His fingers and toes were still cold.  And today…well, today was going to see the end of it, one way or another.  

He wondered if God would listen if he prayed for Gibbs to be all right. Tony wasn't sure if God would honor a request that was basically a prayer for someone else's death, because for Gibbs to be all right meant Ari had to die.  He was a bit rusty on his catechism but he was pretty sure that was a violation of something.  Not that it mattered.  God had never answered a single prayer that Tony knew of…or if He had, the answer had always been no.

Tony told himself he didn't need to worry.  Gibbs always came out on top….except when it came to Ari.  Ari already succeeded in shooting Gibbs once before.  Gibbs had returned the favor Tony reminded himself.  This time….well, this time one of them would be going home in a body bag.  It just remained to be seen which one.  

Tony's gut clenched painfully at that thought.  He knew talking Gibbs into taking him as back up wouldn't work.  Gibbs was nicely predictable that way.  People who mattered to him had to be protected, kept safe.  At least Gibbs hadn't completely lost sight of Tony's ability to take care of himself.  If he had, Tony would have been confined to the building the way Abby had been, and Ducky was supposed to be.  

Tony knew Gibbs wouldn't have assigned him the task of tailing Ziva if he didn't think it was relatively safe.  She was their best link to Ari, and Ari knew it.  It was unlikely Ari would get too close.  He couldn't afford to be linked to any more deaths…not when he was working so damn hard to make it look like someone else had shot Kate.  

Tony didn't resent having to tail Ziva, even knowing it was also Gibbs way of keeping him safe.  She was their best shot at finding Ari.  He knew that.  He just wished Gibbs had trusted him enough to let him be his back up when he'd gone after Ari last night.  

Taking Sheppard was a mistake.  One he knew Gibbs realized now.  He'd seen it in the former Marine's face.  It was to his credit that he assumed people he'd worked with were just as good as they ever were, but it was a stupid thing to do.

Tony wondered if he should be jealous Gibbs had taken Sheppard.  Rumor had it they'd been more than just coworkers a few years ago.  That could just be dismissed as office gossip, but Tony was fairly certain there was a kernel of truth to it. Something in the way Gibbs looked at her, and she looked at him, suggested their history had been intimate at one point.  Tony was too good at reading nuances in body language to miss that.  What he couldn't be sure of was if that old flame had burned out entirely.

This was his longest relationship to date and it was the first time Tony had ever felt even remotely jealous.  Oh he'd been worried about Stan Burley realizing he'd made a mistake in leaving Gibbs' team and retaking his place, or Kate usurping his position on the job as Gibbs' right hand man.  But as far as relationships went, Gibbs was the only one who'd ever been interested in something more than just a good time.  Everyone else had been just a quick fuck and 'see you around some time'.  It was weird to feel like he might even have the right to be possessive, that he might have some real claim on Gibbs.  It hurt to think of all he might lose.

He wasn't really jealous of Gibbs taking Sheppard for his back up.  Gibbs was doing his best to protect people he cared about…mostly by keeping them either as far from him as possible or shut up at the office.  Taking Sheppard with him made Tony think Gibbs didn't value her as highly as he did the rest of his team.  At least, he hoped that was what it meant.

Tony rubbed at his temples again.  This time he knew Gibbs would take someone who knew when to shoot and wouldn't miss.  He tried not to let the thought of Gibbs out there facing Ari scare him, but he knew he was failing.  

He rubbed his gritty eyes and tried to ignore the way his hands trembled.  He wished he had something else to focus on.  Even paperwork would be a godsend about now.  

"Tony?"

He looked up, blinking in surprise to find McGee standing directly in front of him.  "Yeah?"

"I want to go see Kate."  McGee swallowed hard, looking a bit green but resolute.  "I know it's stupid, but I don't want…I mean, would you-"

"I'll come with you," Tony cut him off gently.  There was no reason to leave McGee stuttering or feeling worse than he already did.  Tony regretted lashing out at him the night Kate died.  It had been uncalled for.  It wasn't McGee's fault and he shouldn't have let his temper get the better of him.

He'd told McGee more than once that he should go see Kate.  It would help.  And he owed it to the junior agent to see him through this.  No one should have to do it alone the first time.

Besides, going with McGee would give him something to do to take his mind off the fact that he knew Gibbs was out there doing something potentially dangerous and probably stupid.  He should have fallen in love with a more sensible sort.  But then, Tony doubted a sensible sort would have fallen for him.  

He stood up.  Tony gripped his desk tightly for a moment when the room tilted.  He really should eat something.  Other than two pieces of pizza Gibbs had given him the other night, Tony hadn't eaten much.  He hadn't really been hungry, Kate's death affecting his appetite even more than the plague had.

He wouldn't mind going home and taking a shower.  Tony was mildly surprised to realize he hadn't been home in four days.  It was a good thing he kept more than one change of clothes at the office.  

He ignored the worried expression on McGee's face.  He must look about as worn down as he felt.  Not a good thing. Was probably another reason Gibbs didn't take him along.  He wished it didn't make more sense that Gibbs left him behind because he might be more of a hindrance than help.  It was stupid, wishful thinking to assume Gibbs had left him behind to keep him safe.   The former Marine more than likely just wanted him out of the way.

A voice in his head that sounded a lot like Kate quietly chastised him, "Tony, your insecurities are showing.  Gibbs loves you.  The man said so…and he never says things he doesn't mean. Ever."

Tony saw Kate standing just past McGee's shoulder, still wearing her Catholic school girl outfit.  He wanted to argue, tell her she was wrong, but he really wanted her to be right.  She smiled brightly at him, a look of victory on her face.  

"Gibbs is just dumb enough to think it's better to risk himself than to let you help."  She shook her head, an expression of annoyance on her face showing what she thought of Gibbs' way of handling things.  

She pointed a finger at Tony, her countenance shifting into something stern. "You mark my words, Tony, if he didn't think so much of you, you'd have never been on his team in the first place, much less in his bed. He is just so…well, not used to doing things the right way.  The man has been divorced three times for a reason."

Tony really wished she wasn't a figment of his imagination.  It would be nice to hear her voice for real again.  It would be really nice if what she'd said turned out to be the truth.  

"Tony?"

It took him a second to realize that it was McGee who'd said his name.  He focused on the junior agent when the image of Kate vanished.  "Yeah, McGee?"

McGee eyed him with open concern.  "You're looking a little…well, peaked."

Mentally, Tony snorted.  He'd have to give McGee points for tact.  Gibbs would have said he looked like crap.  And he'd be right.  He felt like crap… drained and empty, stiff and sore, scared and anxious.  That would do it every time.  

"Just tired, McGee."  He smiled wanly, trying to offer some assurances.  "It's been a long couple of days."

"You still have a week of sick leave."

"So people keep telling me."  Tony shook his head.  "Let's go see Kate."  

Together they headed for the elevator.  Tony really wanted to lean against the wall but forced himself to stay upright, squaring his shoulders.  McGee needed him to be strong for him.  It was the least he could do.

Tony let McGee lead the way into the morgue.  He stopped just outside the doorway.  Tony had suggested this visit, and prodded McGee into it, told him it was a good thing to do, but he didn't want the other man to feel like he was being forced.  Tony wanted this to honestly be the other man's choice.   He waited, giving McGee enough space to back out, letting this be his decision.  

McGee never faltered or hesitated as he made his way to the drawer where Kate was.  Tony could see him bracing himself; a deep breath in and out slowly, a faint twitch of his shoulders before he grabbed the handle.  McGee pulled the drawer open, and even though Tony couldn't see his face, he was fairly certain the other man's eyes were closed.

Tony stepped quietly into the room, and made his way to stand behind McGee.  He waited until he knew McGee had given in and looked at her.  "Told you she looked good."

He walked around to the other side of the drawer.  Kate looked like she was sleeping.  He resisted the urge to reach out and touch her not wanting to feel a chill on skin that should be warm.  

"Probie wouldn't believe me, Kate."  He cocked his head to one side, glad she looked like herself.  Talking to her just seemed right, natural.  "He thought you'd look like, <i>Return of the Living Dead</i>."

"Did not."  McGee protested softly, eyes still on Kate.

"Don't lie to the dead, McGee."  Tony shook his head.  "Not nice."  

McGee shrugged his shoulders a little, shifted his weight, a sure sign he was giving in.  "I was a little afraid."

"Kid was terrified," Tony whispered.  Everyone is the first time, Tony thought suddenly feeling a lot older than thirty-three.  "But it took a lot of guts to come down here, alone."  

McGee glanced up at him.  He hadn't really come alone, but Tony knew he would have.  Eventually.  It was good that he didn't have to.

The former cop smiled slightly.  "Showed how much he cared for you."  

Tony wanted McGee to understand he hadn't urged him to do this just because he was a prick.  This was about closure.  For both of them, really, Tony admitted to himself with an honesty he'd never verbalize.  Maybe now he'd stop seeing Kate and hearing her voice.  Maybe now McGee would sleep without nightmares.  Not that he'd admitted to having any, but Tony knew he did.  Hell, they all did.  

"I really did like you," McGee said once more looking down at Kate, eyes bright with unshed tears.  "A lot."

"She knew."  Tony whispered.  She had to have known they liked her.  She was too smart not to have gotten that, not to have understood they were just pulling her pigtails the way little boys do.  

"I'm going to miss her."  

"We all will."  Tony reached for the sheet.  McGee did likewise.  Together they covered her again.  He closed the drawer gently.  Even knowing Kate wouldn't feel a thing, he didn't want to jar her.  

Tony laid his palm against the drawer, leaning in a little, head hanging.  He closed his eyes, a half forgotten memory bringing a prayer to mind.  It was the sort of thing she'd have appreciated.  Kate was a fair better Catholic than Tony was or ever would be.  

His lips moved soundlessly as he repeated what he remembered in Latin.  'Veni creator spiritus, mentes tuorum visita; Imple superna gratia, quae tu creasti, pectora.'

McGee laid a hand on his shoulder.  "You okay?"

Tony nodded tiredly, not really focused on McGee.  He really wished he could remember the entire prayer.  Several stanzas were missing.  Unconsciously he muttered the next bit he could remember aloud.

"Hostem repellas longius, pacemque dones protinus; Ductoresic te praevio, vitemus omne noxium."

"What?"  McGee squeezed his shoulder.  "I don't-"

"Far from us drive our hellish foe, true peace unto us bring," Tony translated.  "And through all perils guide us safe, beneath thy sacred wing."

He wasn't sure if the last bit was for Kate or for Gibbs or all of them.  It would certainly fit.  He wondered if Ari qualified as a hellish foe in God's eyes.  He hoped it didn't matter that he couldn't remember the rest. The sentiment had to count for something.

Tony didn't want to put any more people he cared about in these stupid drawers.  Ever again.  He sighed. He levered himself away from the wall of cold stainless steel.  

"Time to go, McGee."

McGee blinked at him.  "Go where?"

"Home."  

"Oh."  McGee nodded slowly.  "You need a ride?"

Tony smiled, touched by the simple offer.  "No, I'm good."  He still had the rental car the insurance company gave him.  At some point he was going to have to think about actually replacing his car.

"You sure?"

"I'm sure."  Tony patted McGee on the back and ushered him toward the door.

Unless he was mistaken, and he didn't think he was, he'd heard the sounds of someone else in the morgue.  It was most likely Ducky.  The ME would understand better than anyone the need to visit with the dead.  Tony didn't want to intrude on the older man's time alone with Kate if he was simply waiting for them to leave.  

"You are going home, right?"  McGee asked him in the elevator as they headed back up to their floor.  

Tony arched an eyebrow.  "Where else would I go?"  He never went to Gibbs unless the other man was there.  And since he really had no idea where Gibbs was at the moment, Tony's own apartment was the best place to be.  Gibbs would look for him there when this business with Ari was finished.

McGee frowned at him.  "You're not staying here, is what I meant.  Abby said you were on the surveillance tape at two in the morning."  

He wanted to just brush that off as some sort of fluke, a one time thing, but the look on McGee's face told him it wouldn't fly.  He gave McGee a rueful smile.  "Not a secret anymore, hunh?"

"Not sure why it ever was, but no, it's not a secret anymore."  McGee looked concerned.  "So…you are going home…you're not spending another night here?"

"I'm going home."  Tony rubbed at his eyes.  

"You're going to eat something?  I know you haven't been eating much lately."

Tony chuckled.  "You're turning into a mother hen."

McGee blushed.  "Don't want to lose you too," he mumbled, looking away.

Tony was stunned.  He didn't think McGee meant for him to hear that.  He patted McGee on the shoulder.  "I'll eat something," he promised.  He had no idea what, or when, but he'd eat something.

They both grabbed jackets, keys and backpacks before heading out again.  Tony was glad McGee didn't ask about Gibbs.  He was still trying very hard not to think about where his lover was and what he was doing.

He waved to McGee as he got into the rental sedan.  Tony closed his eyes for a moment before starting the car.  He forced himself to think positive.  Gibbs would be home in a few hours, by sunrise at the latest.  Then Tony could kick his ass…figuratively, if not literally, for making him worry, for leaving him behind, for treating him like he was fragile.  

Tony grimaced.  He should have fallen for a sensible sort.  Shame he wasn't a sensible sort or he would have.  Must mean he and Gibbs were really meant to be together.  

He gripped the steering wheel hard enough to whiten his knuckles.  "Miserable bastard had better come home."  Tony resolutely ignored how much his statement sounded like he was praying.  

He took a deep breath.  He trusted Gibbs.  Tony reminded himself that he had more faith in him than he'd ever had in anyone else.  Now was not the time to doubt that.  Gibbs would be home.  And Tony would be waiting when he got there.

He looked at Ziva.  She hadn't hesitated.  Had shown herself to be capable of doing what was required.  No mean feat given that what she had to do was kill her brother.  Gibbs had suspected there was a connection between them, but he hadn't known for sure.  If he'd known for certain, he'd have found someone else; picked another agent to back him up.

But in some ways, it was better like this.  She had been so sure Ari wasn't a double agent, that he hadn't betrayed Israel, hadn't betrayed her.  Ziva needed to know he wasn't the trusted agent she thought he was.  She needed to know he wasn't her loving, older brother.  Hell, her father probably wasn't quite who she thought he was either.  

It made Gibbs feel ancient to see her disillusioned.  He couldn't remember the last time he'd put that much trust in anyone.  Well, until recently.  His team, Tony in particular, were the only people he had any faith in.  It was another reason he couldn't risk any more of them…couldn't risk Tony.  Not here, not with this, not now.  

Gibbs watched Ziva's expression shift…sorrow, disappointment, resolution and pain.  He reached out and carefully took the gun from her.  Gibbs didn't have any words to offer.  He was sorry for her loss, but he wasn't sorry Ari was dead.  It was poetic justice that he died the same way Kate had…at the hands of someone he'd trusted, never even knowing who'd fired the shot.  Gibbs had planned it that way.  He told people he was a bastard, and he meant it.  

Gibbs shook his head.  Ziva wouldn't want to hear what he had to say.  It was best to simply let her deal with this her own way.  

He moved past her and up the stairs.  Gibbs called Sheppard.  He didn't tell her who shot Ari, just that he was dead.  He knew she'd assume he'd shot the bastard, and that was fine with him.  It was better for everyone involved if that was the 'official' story.  

Sheppard told him a crew would be to his house in ten minutes.  They'd take care of the body and the blood.  He'd worry about the rest later.  

He turned to look at Ziva when she came up the stairs.  She swallowed hard.  "What…what happens now?"

"The director is sending a crew to-"

"No."  She shook her head.  "I meant to…him."  Ziva waved a hand toward the basement.  "I want…I want to take him home."  She squared her shoulders, making eye contact.  "He should have a proper burial."

Gibbs didn't know if Ari was Jewish or Moslem at this point, and he wasn't sure it mattered.  Funerals were more for the living than the dead.  It was doubtful Ari would actually give a damn what rites were said over his grave. And if having the wrong rites said meant his soul suffered a little more, Gibbs wasn't going to lose any sleep over it.  And he certainly wasn't going to argue with Ziva over her right to bury her brother.

"I'll make sure they release the body to you."  

She bit her lower lip.  "I'll need to make…arrangements."

"Talk to Jen," Gibbs told her, his tone gentle.  "I'm sure she'll know who to speak with about getting transport."  He wondered vaguely if Ziva would want Ari's coffin draped in Israel's flag.  Ari wasn't really a fallen soldier.  Gibbs wasn't sure exactly what the hell he was…a rogue agent, a terrorist, or just plain insane…any or all would fit.

"When she gets things settled…call me."  Gibbs patted Ziva's shoulder.  "I'll go with you to the airport and make sure everything goes smoothly."  He felt like he owed her that much.

She nodded sharply, dark eyes bright with extra moisture.  He knew she wouldn't cry.  Not in front of him.  Maybe not ever.  He was very glad now that it was her and not Tony who'd shot Ari.  

Tony had been messed up for weeks after killing Jeffery White.  It hadn't been anything obvious, and the rest of the team didn't seem to notice, but Gibbs had.  Tony was capable of violence, would protect those he considered important, but he wasn't ruthless or hard.  Death still bothered him in ways it hadn't affected Gibbs in years.  

To be honest, Gibbs didn't want his lover to become like him…bitter, mean and angry.  He needed that upbeat, sunny smile. He needed Tony's irrepressible humor and lighthearted demeanor.  Tony balanced him like no one else ever had; reminded him he was still capable of love and laughter.  

Gibbs thought Ziva was better equipped to handle the aftermath of cold bloodedly shooting someone in the head.  And even if she wasn't, her problems weren't something he'd have to deal with.  It was a harsh assessment, but no less true.

He opened the door when someone knocked.  He nodded to the 'clean up team' as he'd privately dubbed them.  Gibbs recognized them even though he didn't know what their names were.   
 
His house was basically a crime scene now.  Gibbs was glad Tony was waiting at his place for him.  It would be at least a day or more before Gibbs' house was cleared.  

He sighed softly and rubbed at his eyes.  He was tired.  The last good night's sleep he'd gotten was the night before Tony came back to work.  It seemed a lot more than four days ago.  

One of the crew approached Gibbs.  "It'll take us-"

"Just call me on my cell or at the office when it's done."  Gibbs cut him off.  He didn't need the details.  

"You have somewhere to go, Sir?"  

The guy looked nervous and uncertain.  He reminded Gibbs of McGee.  Gibbs knew he had that affect on people.  Liked having it.

"Yeah, I got somewhere."  Gibbs glared at the other man.

The guy swallowed hard and shifted his weight. "You…you want us to…to lock up when we leave?"

"Just close the door."  Gibbs hadn't locked the door in years.  At this point he wasn't even sure if he could find the key to the house.

"Yes, Sir."

"And stop calling me, Sir," Gibbs snarled.   He hated being called sir.  

Gibbs left.  They could take care of the mess in his basement without an audience.  Ziva would make certain they did a thorough job.  He was sure of that.   

Gibbs drove to Tony's place.  He could feel a nervous flutter in his gut. It was a flutter he hadn't felt since he'd come home to find his third wife had left, her closet empty, her cat gone and a message in lipstick scrawled across the bedroom mirror.  

He hated knowing he'd pissed Tony off.  Tony didn't get angry very often.  Had never been angry with him, and Gibbs wasn't sure how to handle it.  

Tony wouldn't be bought off with an apology.  Especially not when Gibbs really couldn't say he was sorry.  He wasn't sorry.  He was doing what he thought was right and he'd do it again.

Gibbs gripped the steering wheel hard.  It was exactly that attitude that had gotten him a golf club to the head.  Tony could do a lot more damage than that if he wanted to.  Gibbs really hoped Tony didn't want to.

Gibbs took a deep breath as he parked the car.  The digital clock said it was one am.  As late, or early, as it was he knew Tony would still be awake.  He felt a stab of guilt.  Tony should be getting a good night's sleep.  This wasn't the quiet week of desk duty he'd planned for Tony to have.  

Gibbs grimaced.  Hell, it wasn't a week he'd have planned at all, for any of them.  God, but he was tired.  

He got out of the car.  Gibbs hesitated at the door.  He had a key.  He knew he was welcome.  Well, most of the time.  Right now, he wasn't so sure.  He wished the hell relationships were as easy as dealing with the likes of Ari had been.

He stepped back involuntarily when the door suddenly opened.  Tony leaned against it, green eyes looking at him in concern.

"Let me guess…You lost your key and forgot how to knock?" Under the humor in the question was a wealth of other emotions, concern and relief being the easiest to identify.

Gibbs smiled.  "Something like that."

"C'mere."  Tony held out a hand.  

Gibbs took it without hesitation.  He didn't resist when Tony pulled him inside and into a tight embrace.  Gibbs reveled in the feel of Tony's arms wrapped around him; the hard, strong body, warm and alive against his own.  

"I'm so damn glad you are alive," Tony whispered clutching him tighter, "but I am still pissed at you."

"Okay."  Gibbs buried his face where Tony's neck and shoulder met, breathing in deeply.

He understood Tony's relief.  He'd felt the same way when Tony had been infected with the plague, and had come so close to dieing.  He'd been pissed too that something so simple and stupid as opening a letter had been what had put Tony's life at risk in the first place.  

Gibbs sighed and reluctantly let go when he felt Tony start to pull away.  Tony raised both hands to cup his face, jade eyes searching light blue.  

"You're okay?"

He turned his head to place a kiss in Tony's palm.  Physically he was fine.  Emotionally …well that was up to Tony at this point.  He wasn't sure how to articulate that so he settled for, "I'm okay."

"Liar."  Tony smiled softly.

"Time delayed truth," Gibbs countered with a soft smile of his own.  

Tony snorted and rolled his eyes.  "Like that's going to work."  He stepped back tilted his head toward the living room.  "C'mon.  We need to talk."

Gibbs winced.  He knew they needed to talk even if he wasn't quite clear on the why.  He hated having to talk.  Unless it was an interrogation or issuing orders, Gibbs sucked when it came to words.

He followed Tony into the living room. Other than the bedroom, this was his favorite room in Tony's place.  It was homey and comfortable, warm and welcoming the way his own never seemed to be.  

Gibbs had joked with Tony early on about the state of his apartment, and Tony had gone along with him, but it was always neat and organized.  Tony played up the whole frat-boy, bachelor image, but like a lot of things it wasn't the whole truth, or even close to it.  Gibbs knew it wasn't Louisa who kept the place tidy.  He knew she spent less than an hour at Tony's place running the vacuum around and dusting.  It gave her more time to bake him cookies and leave dinner in his fridge.

There was something soft and melodic coming from the stereo. Gibbs didn't recognize the music but then he didn't know most of the stuff Tony had.   He'd grown accustomed to that background noise always being present; so much so that he had the radio or TV on at his place most of the time even when Tony wasn't there.  

"You want something to drink?"  Tony offered.

He'd love a stiff drink, but somehow Gibbs didn't think that would help.  He shook his head.  "No.  Thanks."

Tony nodded and sighed. He rubbed at his eyes.  Gibbs winced internally at how tired Tony looked.

"You should be in bed."

Tony snorted.  He gave Gibbs a hard look.  "If I were out facing down a killer…and you didn't know where I was or who I was using for back up…would you be able to sleep?"

Gibbs opened his mouth and then snapped it shut. When Tony had been on the run, chained to Jeffrey White, even before Gibbs had known Jeffrey was a killer he'd been nearly frantic.  Not that anyone could tell.  Gibbs had too much control for that.  He couldn't even admit to Kate that he was worried.  Saying it out loud would have validated his concern, would have made the fear more real.  Kate never understood that.

"No."  Gibbs finally said, sitting down on the edge of the couch.  "I wouldn't be sleeping."

Tony cocked his head to one side.  Gibbs tried not to feel uneasy under that intense scrutiny.  He'd done this to suspects but Gibbs had never realized just how unnerving it could be to be on the receiving end.

"You almost got it."

"Got it?"

"Why I'm mad at you."

Gibbs frowned.   Tony sighed heavily and sat down on the opposite end of the couch. He shook his head.  

"You…Leroy Jethro Gibbs are not invincible or immortal."

"I know that."

"Do you?"  Tony arched an eyebrow.  "You sure don't act like it."  

Gibbs grimaced.  He thought Tony understood that getting Ari was necessary.  It had to be done.  "Look, I know you don't like that-"

"Did you mean it when you said you love me?"  Tony neatly cut him off.

Gibbs blinked.  "Yes!"  He reached out to grab Tony's hand. He couldn't have Tony doubting that. "Hell, yes I meant it.  I love you, Tony.  You have to believe that."

Tony nodded slowly, eyes never leaving his.  "Did you believe me when I said I love you?"  

Gibbs felt his breath catch, unsure of where Tony was going with this line of questioning.  "Yes, I believe you."

"Then why would you think your death would hurt me any less than mine would hurt you?"  The question was gentle, Tony's expression an earnest quest for understanding. He squeezed Gibbs' hand. "Why would you think I wouldn't want you as safe and sound as you want me to be?"  

Gibbs stared at him.  It had never even occurred to him.  Although, in hindsight, he realized it should have.

Tony moved closer.  "You never got left behind, did you?  Never sat at home with nothing more to do than wait, worry and pray?"

Gibbs was used to being the one on the front lines, the protector, the defender, active and focused on getting things done. It was a role he'd been comfortable with since he joined the Marines at eighteen.  He hated feeling helpless and he should have known Tony would share that feeling.  

He'd gotten a taste of what it was to have a loved one deliberately placing himself in danger when Tony was chained to Jeffrey, but just a small taste.  He could do something to help, was actively working the case and doing his best to get Tony back.  The same was true when Tony was infected with the plague.  There was a case to work, clues to follow, a chance of finding an antidote.  He'd nearly gone insane when quarantined by Ducky, unable to do anything to help.  He'd actively avoided thinking about what might happen to Tony, focusing exclusively on the thought that his lover would live.

"I just wanted you to be safe."  Gibbs whispered; being out of the line of fire equated to safe in his mind.  

"Taking on all this shit alone, keeping me at a distance from the action…it won't keep me safe."  Tony reached out and cupped Gibbs' face with one hand, his thumb caressing Gibbs' cheek.  

"I nearly died a few times before I met you, you know."  Tony looked away.  "There was a car accident when I was fifteen."

Gibbs jaw tightened.  It was undoubtedly the same accident that had been fatal for Tony's mother.  Gibbs wasn't sorry that woman had died…If she'd been abusing Tony as he suspected, then she got off easy in Gibbs' opinion.  But it hadn't occurred to him that Tony's own life might have been at risk in the same accident.  

"There was a jumper who nearly took me with him when I worked in Philly."  Tony leaned in a little closer.  "A meth addict with a knife in Baltimore."

Gibbs flinched.  He couldn't imagine his life without Tony as part of it.  Didn't want to even contemplate what it would be like if he'd never met the younger man.  

Tony smirked.  "Ours is a risky business, boss."

"That's a stupid cliché."  Gibbs glared at Tony.  He shouldn't make light of this.

"Doesn't make it any less true." Tony shrugged, an unrepentant look on his face.  "Pacci was just following the money.  Voss looked harmless enough and she gutted him."

Gibbs winced.  Voss could easily have done the same to Tony.  Nearly had.  And Voss wasn't the only one.  Tony had been at risk, in harm's way, a lot over the past four years.

"And you were there for all of it."  Tony pointed out clearly able to see where his thoughts had gone.  "I trust you to be there for me, to have my back when it comes to all the crazy shit we get into."

Tony bit his lip.  "I wish you trusted me to do the same for you."

"I do."  Gibbs insisted.  "I do…it was just…damn it, Tony, I can't lose you."  His voice broke.  He'd lost too many, lost too much already.  

"And you think it would be easier for me to lose you?" Tony shook his head.  

Gibbs felt a bit like a light bulb should suddenly be shining over his head as he made the connection Tony had clearly been trying to relay.  He was damn glad Tony was better at expressing himself and far more patient than his former wives had been.  But then, he had more common ground with Tony than he had with them.  So maybe it wasn't all their fault he didn't quite get what they were saying.  

Tony's countenance was a mixture of affection and exasperation.  "You are such a dumb shit some times, you know that."

Gibbs found himself smiling.  "Does this mean I'm forgiven?"

"Depends."

Gibbs froze, smile fading.  "On what?"

"You going to pull this crap again?"  Tony's eyes shuttered, becoming unreadable.  "I'd rather sleep alone than have you out there without reliable back up."

Gibbs hesitated.  He couldn't promise not to put Tony's safety ahead of his own.  Couldn't promise he wouldn't try to handle things solo when he thought that was best.  But he had to say something here.

"I'll try not to," Gibbs finally said, unable to lie outright.

"Okay."  Tony nodded.  

Gibbs blinked.  What the hell did that mean?  Had he just fucked up and given the wrong answer?   Should he have found a way to lie?  "Okay, what?"

"I wanted honesty, not for you to tell me what you think I want to hear.  And you gave me that."  Tony smiled.  "You always do."  

Tony shrugged one shoulder and made a vague meaningless gesture with one hand.  "I know you didn't think it through this time.  You didn't get it.  Now you do."  

He pointed a finger at Gibbs.  "You'll try…and from you, that means a lot more than it does coming from most people, Jethro."  Tony leaned forward and rested his forehead against Gibbs.  "And just so we're clear, I'll ride your ass about it again at some point when you don't try hard enough."  

Gibbs smiled.  He could live with that.  "Okay."

"We'll make it work."

"We'll make it work." Gibbs repeated, giving the statement the weight of a promise.  

Gibbs felt tension draining out of him like water released from behind a dam.  He sighed and leaned more heavily into Tony.  He could spend the night right here, just like this.

"But you aren't going to."  

Gibbs blinked, not realizing he'd even spoken aloud until he heard Tony's comment.  Tony smiled, and kissed him gently.  Tony stood up and offered him a hand.  "C'mon.  Let's go see about working on eight hours of sleep. Things will look better in the morning."

Gibbs was tempted to dismiss that bit of optimism.  It was as cliché as Tony's earlier statement about their jobs being a risky business.  But he really didn't want to dismiss it.  He wanted to believe things would look better in the morning, and was going to do his best find the truth in that old cliché.

He followed Tony into the bedroom.  The younger man placed a hand on his chest, stopping him in the center of the dimly lit room.  With gentle care, Tony stripped him out of his clothing, leaving him in just his underwear.

Goosebumps rose, and Gibbs found himself leaning into Tony's warmth.  Tony led him to the bed and together they lay down. Gibbs wrapped his arms around Tony, pulling the younger man closer to him.   

It had only been a few days, and he'd missed being able to do this.  Gibbs hadn't even realized just how much he'd missed it until this moment.  He shivered thinking how close he'd come in the past few days to never being able to do this again.  

Tony placed a kiss above his heart.  "Stop thinking."

Easier said than done, Gibbs thought with a smile.  He nuzzled Tony's hair, enjoying the way the silken strands felt against his skin.  "I'll try."

"Good…'nough."  Tony mumbled, yawning.  

Gibbs closed his eyes and centered himself in the moment. What was done, was done.  And he'd deal with tomorrow when he had to.  For now, it was enough just to be content.

He opened his eyes when he felt Tony nuzzle his neck.  A soft kiss was placed on that spot just under his ear that always made him shiver.  He automatically tilted his head, stretching to give Tony more room and greater access.  

Tony nibbled on his ear lobe, sucking gently.  Gibbs moaned quietly.  He'd never known his ears were so damn sensitive before meeting Tony.

"Morning, Jethro," Tony whispered.  His usual smooth tenor was rough with sleep and desire.  Gibbs loved it when Tony sounded like this.  

"Morning."  Gibbs cupped Tony's face, pulling him up for a proper kiss.  He'd never quite figured out how Tony managed not to have morning mouth, but he always tasted good.

Gibbs moaned into Tony's mouth.  He'd never figured out how Tony did that thing with his tongue either, but the man was talented that's for sure.  Gibbs hated having to breathe; it meant he had to lose contact, even if only for a moment, from that delectable mouth.

Tony smiled at him.  He waggled his eyebrows before ducking his head to place a kiss at the hollow of Gibbs' throat.   Gibbs was convinced at times like this Tony was part octopus; his hands seemed to be everywhere…stroking, caressing, teasing, arousing and massaging.  God.

That clever, talented tongue was now doing things to his right nipple that made it hard to think.  Gibbs' fingers clenched in Tony's hair, holding him in place, mutely demanding more.  Tony gently applied his teeth, tugging on the hard nub.   Gibbs moaned, arching his back in response.  

Tony released his hold, the broad pad of his tongue passing over the sensitive flesh making Gibbs whimper.  Tony nipped and licked his way to the left nipple, giving it the same treatment he had the right.  Gibbs bit his lip to keep from making embarrassing little mewling sounds of pleasure.

Gibbs instinctively began moving his hips, thrusting lazily against Tony.  The brush of cotton against his skin created a delightful friction.  He knew skin on skin would be better and not for the first time did Gibbs regret that he hadn't made a habit of sleeping completely naked the way Tony did.  

Everywhere Tony touched him was like being touched by a flame.  But rather than burn him, it just made him hungry for more.  He wrapped himself around Tony, trying to do the impossible and pull him even closer.  

He breathed in deeply, taking in Tony's scent, cataloging each bit of the fragrance he could identify.  There was sweat, spice, musk and something that always reminded him of dark chocolate... bittersweet.  That not quite definable, almost like chocolate component was always strongest in the morning.  It was lost during the day under the stronger scents of Tony's soap, cologne and hair products.  Gibbs loved thinking it was something about his lover reserved just for him.

He ran his fingers through Tony's hair and down his back.  Gibbs enjoyed the smooth feel of Tony's warm skin under his fingers.  It was like silk and he didn't think he'd ever get enough of just touching Tony.  He was rewarded with one of those rumbling sighs that sounded so much like a cat purring.  

He wanted to take his time, slow down and enjoy each and every sensation. But somehow morning sex always seemed more urgent to him, as though he were sneaking some forbidden delight.  In the back of his mind lurked a half forgotten fear that something or someone might interrupt, ruining the moment before letting it come to its natural completion.

So in spite of himself, Gibbs found his hips thrusting harder against Tony. He was breathing in harsh pants; hot, hard and hungry for as much as he could get as fast as Tony could give it.  Tony met him easily, matching him move for move, reminding Gibbs anew that the younger man knew how to dance.  

Gibbs was torn between wanting to create enough room between them and escape the confines of his boxers and never, ever letting go.  Everything just felt so good….every touch, every kiss, each sigh and moan, every whispered eager word of encouragement.  Stopping or even slowing down simply wasn't an option.

He captured Tony's mouth in a kiss that was nearly savage in its intensity.  Their tongues dueled for dominance even though Gibbs didn't give a damn about who won.  He caressed the roof of Tony's mouth with his tongue, enjoying the way it made his lover shiver.  

He swallowed Tony's gasp of pleasure, already seeking more.  Without thinking, his assault on Tony's mouth began to mimic the same rhythm their hips had already established.  Back and forth, give and take, asking and demanding…it was impossible to know who lead and who followed.

He gripped Tony's arms, fingers clenching and flexing as he searched for purchase, something to hold on to as his orgasm began to overwhelm him.  Gibbs wanted to protest, not wanting this glorious moment of mutual pleasure and satisfaction to be over so soon.  But the bliss enveloped him with the force of a tidal wave making it hard to regret anything.

He felt Tony tense, muscles constricting, twitching randomly.  There was this timeless, suspended moment that happened every time, right before Tony came.  Gibbs didn't really believe in auras, but at that moment, he would swear he could almost see the rush of ecstasy flow over Tony like a ray of white light.

Tony seemed to just melt into him, boneless now in comparison to the rigid tension of just a moment ago.  Gibbs welcomed the added weight.  He liked how solid Tony felt.  Tony was durable and strong, not someone he had to worry about being careful not to hold too tightly.

Tony sighed, and rubbed his face against Gibbs' chest.  The morning stubble he usually sported prickled, but Tony's was a lot softer than his own tended to be.  He'd never gotten beard burn from Tony.    

Gibbs forced himself not to resist when Tony shifted and started to pull away.  Tony looked down at him and grinned.  He kissed the tip of Gibbs' nose.

"Good morning."

"Very good morning."  Gibbs felt an answering grin spread across his face.  

Tony chuckled.  It was a deep, raspy sound that created the same delightful shivers down Gibbs' back as his 'just woke up' voice.  "Think we need to get cleaned up and get moving."

He wanted to argue.  But he knew it wasn't really an option.  The realization that Kate's funeral was today hit him like a slap in the face.  Gibbs couldn't believe he'd actually forgotten that.

Tony rested his forehead against Gibbs'.  "It's like getting kicked in the gut.  I know."

Gibbs sighed.  Blue eyes studied green.  "You okay?"

"Getting there." Tony managed to shrug without losing contact.  

Gibbs didn't like the shadows he saw in Tony's eyes.  It would take time for them to fade.  Gibbs knew they'd never totally disappear; they never did, they just became less obvious.  

Gibbs hesitated to ask if Tony needed to talk about Kate's death.  He didn't have the words for this sort of thing.  He didn't like to talk about shit, hated to in fact.  Didn't want to dwell on it, and everything he should have done, on everything that went wrong.  But he owed it to Tony to give him the option of talking about it if he wanted to.

"Tony…about what happened to Kate-"

Tony shook his head, and carelessly pushed back the comforter, rising smoothly to his feet.  It was an effective signal he wasn't interested in talking about Kate's death.  Where Gibbs usually opted for silence and a cold stare when confronted with things he didn't want to talk about; Tony usually chose distraction. The younger man could avoid things he didn't want to talk about with the best of them.  

"C'mon."  He held out a hand to Gibbs.  "I can hear the shower calling."

Gibbs took his hand, letting Tony pull him to his feet, opting to drop it for now. At the office, pushing worked.  It was his job there to demand more.  But here, pushing would be a mistake.  Here, it was Jethro and Tony, not just Gibbs and DiNozzo, a distinction Gibbs worked very hard not to lose sight of.  He had to trust that Tony would come to him when he was ready, the same way he'd go to Tony.

Connecting with Tony on a physical level, even without the added element of sex was always an enjoyable pastime.  Showering with Tony gave Gibbs free rein to explore, to openly admire the toned muscles and smooth skin.  

Gibbs found he often needed to touch…to ground himself, to communicate when words failed him as they so often did. And it was clear Tony liked and needed to be touched.  The younger man obviously craved contact.  It made Gibbs feel good to give something so simple and yet meaningful to his lover.  

Gibbs suspected it wasn't just that Tony was a hedonist.  No, he thought it far more likely that Tony simply hadn't gotten enough contact as a child.  It made his gut tighten when he realized Tony had probably gotten hit by his mother more often than he'd been kissed by her.  And God only knew what his father had done.  More likely had simply ignored his son the way he'd ignored the obvious signs of abuse.  Gibbs really hoped he and Anthony DiNozzo Sr. never met.  He'd kill the son of a bitch.

They didn't talk much in the shower.  Gibbs was content to let his actions speak for him.  And he didn't think there was much to be said at this point.  Dealing with the upcoming funeral was going to be difficult whether they talked about it or not.  

Wrapping a towel around his waist, Gibbs was glad he'd moved things to Tony's place.  He wouldn't have to go back to his place for a dark suit and tie.  He grimaced when he realized he probably couldn't even get back into his house right now anyway.   

"What?"

Gibbs blinked.  "What, what?"

"The look on your face." Tony clarified with a small frown.  "What's wrong?"

"My house is a crime scene."

Tony raised both eyebrows.  "Come again?"

Gibbs belatedly realized they hadn't talked about what happened last night.  He stared at the younger man in bemusement.  "You never asked about Ari?"

Tony shrugged.  "He's dead."  Green eyes narrowed.  "Right?"

"Yes."

Tony hesitated for a moment and Gibbs could almost see him putting the pieces together.  "In your house."  

It wasn't a question but Gibbs answered anyway.  "Yes."

"You kill him?"

"Report will say I did," Gibbs returned evenly, never breaking eye contact.  

Tony arched an eyebrow, but didn't comment.  Gibbs knew he was savvy enough to understand what he was and wasn't saying.  Unlike most people, Tony knew when not to ask for more information, not to demand everything be spelled out, to let implication stand for fact and let it go at that.

"Single shot to the head."  Gibbs owed him that much.  

Tony smiled knowingly.  "Just like Kate."

Gibbs nodded.  "He followed me to my house.  Threatened me.  And now he's dead."

"Neat and clean."  Tony snorted, dark amusement in his eyes.  Nothing was ever that neat and clean and they both knew it.

Gibbs nodded slowly.  He wasn't going to tell Tony everything Ari had said.  Why he became a terrorist wasn't really important nor was his relationship with his father.  And he would no more reveal Ziva's secrets to Tony than he would tell her Tony's.  

Claiming responsibility for Ari's death had seemed like the best option to Gibbs.  He didn't owe Ziva any loyalty or favors, but somehow he didn't want her to have to explain to Mossad or her father how it came to be that she shot her brother.  

"As long as it's done." Tony sighed quietly.  He leaned in and chastely kissed Gibbs' mouth.  "None of this had better come back to bite you in the ass."

"From your lips to God's ear."  It was an expression Gibbs' grandmother had used a lot when he was growing up.  

"Amen," Tony breathed out softly.   

And just like that Gibbs knew this conversation was over.  Nothing more would be said about it, no more questions would be asked.  Gibbs wasn't sure he'd be able to do the same if he was in Tony's position.  He was grateful his lover was far more sensible and understanding than he was.  One of us has to be, he thought ruefully, or we wouldn't have made it this far.

Tony moved away and started to dress in a dark suit.  Ordinarily, Gibbs would have indulged himself in watching Tony dress.  There was something nearly irresistible about the graceful movements working to conceal that beautiful body beneath layers of fabric.  But today, he really didn't have time to indulge himself any more than he already had.  Resolutely looking away, Gibbs donned his own dark suit.  His cell phone rang as he was finishing the knot on his tie.  

Tony handed him the phone as he headed for the kitchen. "Coffee should be ready."

Gibbs nodded his understanding, frowning at the caller ID display on his phone.  He didn't recognize the number.  "Gibbs," he snapped out his usual response as he answered the call.

Somehow he wasn't surprised to find the call was from Ziva.  "Gibbs, I need your help."

"Go on."

He listened as she outlined her problem with some bureaucratic bullshit.  Gibbs hated politics on a good day, and even though the day had started out wonderfully, it wasn't going to be a good day.  He closed his eyes and counted slowly, marshalling his patience.

"I'll be there in twenty minutes."  Gibbs told her, projecting the same calm authority he always used.  "I'll get it straightened out."

He snapped the phone shut and headed for the kitchen.  Tony offered him a cup of coffee.  He breathed in the rich fragrance before taking a long swallow.

"Problem, Boss?"

Gibbs grimaced.  "Need to clear up some details so they can release the body to Ziva."

Tony arched an eyebrow.  "Shouldn't that be something the Director handles?"

"Sheppard is already on her way to Indiana.  She wanted to meet with the Todd's before the funeral."

Tony snorted, expression cynical.  "She didn't even know Kate."

Gibbs resisted the urge to roll his eyes.  Politics played out even during death.  There was no avoiding it.

Tony shook his head.  "You think you'll get it squared away in time to fly with us?"

"I hope so."  Red tape was a black hole of time consumption.  He really had no idea how long it would take to clear up.

Tony reached past him to pull a sheet of paper free from the magnet holding it to the fridge.  He offered it to Gibbs.  Gibbs set his cup on the counter, glancing at the paper.  He smiled.  It was a listing of later flights that would still get him out in time to make the funeral.

"When did you-"

"Last night.  Wasn't sure how soon you'd wrap things up."  Tony shrugged.  "Figured you might need that…just in case."

"Good thinking."

Tony nodded.  He gave Gibbs a quick kiss.  "We better get going."

Gibbs caught his arm as Tony started to move past him.  Tony cocked his head, the question on his face so clear he didn't have to ask.

"Thank you."

Tony blinked.  "For what?"

"Everything."  

Gibbs captured Tony's mouth in a gentle, heartfelt kiss.  He tried to let that kiss convey all the things he couldn't put into words; to let it articulate for him how much he loved Tony, how grateful he was for the younger man, how happy Tony made him.  He knew he'd succeeded when he pulled back and got an incandescent smile from Tony.  

"You're welcome."  Tony's gaze flicked away shyly, a faint blush coloring his cheekbones.  

He cleared his throat and pointed toward the door with a thumb over his shoulder.  "We need to-"

"Yeah."  Gibbs folded the flight list and shoved it in his pocket.  "Time to go."  

He grabbed his coffee mug, taking another deep swallow before following Tony out the door.  He was definitely going to have to get some sort of travel mug one of these days.  Letting the rest of that pot of sinfully good coffee go to waste was a crime.

"I'll be there."  He promised as he and Tony headed for separate cars.  "I might be late, but I'll be there."

Tony nodded, taking him at his word without question.  "I hear you, Boss."

Gibbs really hoped the crap with customs or immigration or whoever could be cleared up easily.  He wasn't going to miss the funeral. He owed it to Kate…to the others.  He already had enough guilt to handle; he wasn't taking on any more.  Not today.  

He hadn't always appreciated or understood her uptight, almost prudish views on sex and life in general but he'd liked her.  She was smart, capable and beautiful.  Kate usually gave as good as she got too.  He was going to miss her.  A lot.  

He stifled a smile when he thought of how pissed she'd get every time he rifled through her desk and her purse.  Other than his phone, Tony had learned not to keep anything of personal significance at the office.  She really should have learned to do likewise.

His good humor faded when he thought about having to go through her things.  Gibbs would likely do that the same way he went through Pacci's desk.  Having seen what Kate kept in hers, there would be no unpleasant surprises for her family.  

He sighed softly, moving to kneel and then stand in the appropriate places.  Tony was sure Kate would have appreciated all the symbolism and formality, but he was tired of it.  He hadn't set foot inside a Catholic church in years, and it would probably be years before he did again. At least he hoped so.  

Tony found himself looking around discretely.  The architecture was typical of nearly every Catholic church.  A vaulted dome ceiling arched overhead like heaven itself, designed to make those below feel humble in God's house.   Stain glass windows muted sunlight, creating rainbows and showcasing the lives of different saints at the same time.  The wooden pews felt solid, heavy and immutable. Marble tiles created an intricate pattern on the floor, drawing the eye to the alpha and omega mosaic in front of the alter.

The paintings were exquisite.  He found his gaze fixed on the likeness of the Virgin.  Deep, soulful eyes seemed to be looking down on Kate's coffin with compassion.  He instinctively found himself reciting the Hail Mary and hoping She really would look after Kate.  

Tony did his best to ignore the way Kate's mother wept quietly through the whole service.  She was so much like her daughter it hurt to look at her.  Kate's father seemed to draw as much support from his wife as he gave to her.  They reminded Tony of the Ozzie and Harriet type couple he'd always idolized.  

He really couldn't see his own death ever devastating his father and stepmother the way Kate's seemed to have affected her parents.  His jaw tightened, clamping down hard on the bitter, sour feeling that always rose whenever he thought of his mother and father.  Tony took a slow, deliberate breath and refocused his attention on the service.

He was startled when Gibbs slipped soundlessly into the pew to stand next to him.  Gibbs ignored accusing glances sent by the other mourners and the curious looks from Abby and McGee.  Tony just tipped his head in acknowledgement.  

Tony was glad Gibbs managed to make it.  He didn't think the older man could handle any more guilt, and he had no doubts that Gibbs would feel guilty if he'd missed the funeral entirely.  Hell, Tony had plenty of his own guilt to deal with too. It was just one more thing he didn't want to think about.

He took a slow deep breath and then another.  He really hated funerals.  Tony felt better when Gibbs' fingers brushed his.  It was a subtle caress, something few would even notice and could easily appear to be nothing more than accidental.  Tony returned the gesture.  

He breathed a soft sigh of relief when the mass was finally finished.  All that was left now was the graveside bit.  The cemetery was just across the street.  It was a lovely spot of neatly manicured green, with shade trees strategically placed to suggest something more like a park than a city of the dead.  The headstones were all an older style, ornately carved granite or marble.  Kate would have loved it.

Tony gave it all a jaded look, hating the lack of contact with the living and the rest of the world it seemed to convey.  It was a lot like where his mother was buried.  He'd only ever been there once and never saw any reason to go back.

His aunt Sully had been cremated and had requested he spread her ashes among her favorite places.  She said she wanted to become as much a part of them as they'd been a part of her.  He needed to update his will to have the same done for him.  No matter how pretty it was, Tony never wanted to be lost in a place so sterile, remote and unused. He wanted his remains to be left somewhere messy, vibrant and alive.

Gibbs walked in step with him for a bit before falling back to speak to the director.  Tony assumed he was telling her about taking care of getting Ari's body released to Ziva.  He suppressed a snort.  He understood her need to be present at the funeral; it would have been an insult if the Director hadn't shown up to offer condolences to the family for their loss, but she'd seemed just a bit too eager to shirk the duty of seeing all the I's dotted and T's crossed on the case.  

At the very least, she should have assigned someone to handle releasing Ari's body, seen to it that things were taken care of, not simply left Ziva to fend for herself.  Tony wondered if Ziva realized whatever friendship she claimed with Sheppard took a huge back seat to politics and appearances for the agency.   She likely did given it was Gibbs she'd called to cut through the red tape and bureaucracy.  

Tony stood next to McGee as the pallbearers settled the coffin in to place.  He wasn't surprised Kate had requested her coworkers in the Secret Service act as her honor guard.  She hadn't worked with NCIS even half as long as she'd worked there.  And he knew she was still good friends with them.  

Tony eyed the bagpipers warily.  He was all for tradition…just not for him.  Tony made a mental note to add them to the list as one more thing he didn't want at his own funeral.

Tony smiled softly when it was time to leave and Abby asked for permission to play something for Kate.  Now that was a tradition he had no issues with.  A little jazz was never a bad thing.  

He waited until people started to leave, wanting a moment to be alone with Kate.  He'd tracked down a florist in the area who had tea roses.  The thorns were nearly as big as the small, red flowers.  The bouquet was held together with a simple white silk ribbon.

"Tea roses, Kate."  Tony spoke quietly, wary of being overheard.  He wanted this moment to be private.  "Not big, or flashy, but my aunt Sully told me giving them to a woman used to mean 'I'll always remember'."  

He held them to his nose and took in the scent, enjoying the light fragrance before deliberately pricking his fingertips on the thorns.  "Pleasure and pain…the stuff of life, Kate.  You were both.  And I will remember you."

He placed the tea roses neatly on top of her coffin.  They looked good among the lilies her parents had left there.  Tony blinked rapidly several times, refusing to cry.  He hadn't cried in years, he wasn't going to start now.

"Tony?"

"Yeah, Boss?"  He instinctively squared his shoulders, not quite coming to attention as he turned to look at Gibbs.

Gibbs stepped closer, narrowing the distance between them.  "You okay?"

"Fine."  Tony nodded to the coffin.  "Just saying good-bye."

If Gibbs wondered about the addition of the roses he didn't comment on it.  He laid a hand on Tony's shoulder and squeezed once.  "The others are waiting at the car."

"Right."  Tony cleared his throat, and wiped his eyes, relieved to find they were just as dry as he hoped they were.

"C'mon."  Gibbs hand moved to rest on his lower back, urging him toward where the others waited.  

"Where are Ducky and Palmer?"

"I sent them on to the airport with the Director."  

"She piss you off?"  Tony smirked thinking about her being subjected to one of Ducky's long winded stories.  "Or did they?"

"A little of both," Gibbs admitted with a rueful look.

Tony already had an idea of what Sheppard had done.  Gibbs hated cleaning up other people's messes, and he ranked red tape right up there with one of the seven deadly sins.  But he had no idea what Ducky or Palmer might have done.  He arched an eyebrow in askance.

"Palmer made a comment about my late arrival."

"Ah."  Tony nodded.  Palmer tended to annoy Gibbs just by breathing, and he had a real knack for saying things better left unsaid.  But Ducky liked him, so the ME had probably volunteered to go with him rather than let the Director leave the younger man with a permanent stutter.  

"You rent a car?"  Tony asked, realizing Gibbs had to have gotten to the church somehow.

"Cab."  

That alone would explain his late arrival.  Tony doubted cabbies in Indiana were much like those in NY or DC.  They might actually obey the speed limits; view them as genuine mandates rather than mere suggestions.

At the car, Tony tried not to let Abby's watery gaze get to him.  He bent down and kissed her cheek.  "It'll be okay, Abby," he whispered in her ear.  "Eventually."

She nodded and hugged him hard.  He wasn't sure, but he thought this was probably the first time Abby had ever lost anyone this close to her to violence.  Old age, illness or an accident, sure, but it wasn't every day a friend was lost to a terrorist with a personal grudge.  

He sighed softly and pulled away from Abby.  Tony patted McGee's shoulder, but didn't say anything to him.  He had no idea what to say.

Tony walked around the car, taking the front passenger seat automatically.  Gibbs slid in behind the steering wheel, while Abby and McGee took the back.  He didn't have to look in the rearview mirror to know that McGee was holding Abby, and rocking her gently.

Gibbs lay a hand on top of his where it rested on the seat between them, strong fingers curling around his in a gentle hold.  It was such a simple thing, and yet so very reassuring.  Tony leaned back and closed his eyes, the contact between them warming him as much as the sunlight streaming through the windows.  

Tony wasn't sure but he thought he might have actually dozed off on the way to the airport.  Riding in a car with nothing to do usually had that affect on him.  There was something relaxing about being in motion.

The ride from the church to the airport certainly seemed shorter than from the airport to the church.  He chalked that up to Gibbs' driving.  If the other man knew short cuts here, Tony really didn't want to know about them.  He was hoping like hell to never return so the knowing the short cuts wasn't something he really needed to learn.

Tony arranged his expression into something blandly neutral when they pulled into the rental return area and the Director was waiting for them. She didn't look pleased, lips tightly compressed.  Having been trapped in a car with Ducky before, Tony could understand that.  Although, he had to admit from time to time he enjoyed listening to Ducky ramble.  The ME had a nice voice.

Tony just didn't feel like dealing with her, and whatever baggage existed between her and Gibbs.  Not today.  So he simply stepped over to where the shuttle bus waited and found a seat.  Avoidance was something he was intimately familiar with.  

Abby took the seat next to him, and McGee sat next to her.  She took one of Tony's hands in her's, and McGee's in the other before laying her head on Tony's shoulder.  Tony tilted his head to place a kiss in her hair.  

Gibbs followed them on a moment later.  Tony didn't know if he'd talked to Sheppard or not, but he was glad the older man elected to sit in the open seat next to him.  There was no room left then for anyone else.  

Ducky and Palmer sat next to one another.  Ducky was still telling some story that involved a platypus, several young seamen and a surfboard.  Tony half wished he'd heard the beginning of that one.  

The only seat left for Sheppard was across from Ducky.  Tony unconsciously conceded black was a good color for her.  Shame she'd elected such a severe hair style.  He shook his head at his own thoughts, but he'd always appreciated the efforts women put into looking good.  

Since they were only in for the funeral, none of them had traveled with luggage and E-tickets made for a quick and painless checking.  Tony briefly considered upgrading to first class when he saw there were seats available but he didn't follow through.  He didn't think he could convince Gibbs it was worth the added expense, and Tony had no intention of sitting by himself.  

And Sheppard was flying first class.  He really didn't want to share much space with her at the moment.  She wasn't part of the team.  She hadn't known Kate.  And Tony didn't think she'd fully understand just what they'd lost.  This wasn't about closure for Sheppard, this was an obligation, a duty, a demand of her new position.  Besides, he didn't like the looks she kept giving Gibbs so the further away she sat the better as far as Tony was concerned.  

Airport security wasn't as easy to navigate as checking in.  Tony had grown used to the time delay.  There was no point in being pissed about the situation or with security for just doing their job.  So he stood in line patiently, watching other people and playing 'I Spy' with Abby.  

Once through security, they had just over half an hour to wait until they could begin boarding.   It was good timing.  Tony hadn't realized when McGee asked about the possible length of the funeral service that he was actually planning their return trip.  

"Good job with the tickets, McGee," Tony belatedly complimented him as he stared out the window at the tarmac.  "Real good timing."

McGee gave him a small smile, clearly pleased by the praise.  "Thanks."

Tony wandered over to one of the few vending machines in the area.  They were rare in most airports, usually because the restaurants and bars had a captive clientele and they wanted to keep it that way.  Tony fed it, paying for the overpriced water and two sodas.  

He offered one of the sodas to Abby.  "Not your usual, but I figured-"

"Thanks."  She beamed at him.  

Tony handed another to McGee.  He ignored the surprised look in McGee's face.  He didn't know if it was because McGee didn't think he could be generous or if it was because he hadn't realized Tony knew his favorite soda was Code Red.  

"Thank you."

"Welcome."  Tony gave Gibbs an apologetic look.  "You want coffee?"

"Maybe later."  Gibbs shook his head.  

"Ducky?  Palmer?  You guys want anything?"  

"Thank you, Anthony, but no."  Ducky smiled at him.  Palmer just shook his head jerkily as though afraid to speak.  

He looked at the Director.  She was on her cell phone speaking to someone in hushed tones.  Tony shrugged.  He sat next to Gibbs, sipping his water.  He hadn't eaten since yesterday, but he wasn't really hungry.  

Tony was relieved when they finally began boarding.  It was one step toward getting closer to home.  The faint brush of Gibbs' hand on the small of his back was a quiet, welcomed reminder that home meant a lot more than it used to.

Tony settled into his seat behind Abby and McGee, sighing softly.  With his long legs he usually hated taking a window seat, but with Gibbs seated next to him, Tony didn't mind the close quarters.  He closed his eyes and without thinking let his head roll to the side to rest on Gibbs' shoulder much the way Abby had done to him earlier.  

"You okay?"  He heard Gibbs whisper.

"Just tired."  Tony had forgotten how exhausting funerals could be.  And they hadn't really gotten that much sleep last night.  Or the night before that.  Or the one before that, Tony thought wryly.  A hell of a lot had happened in the last few days.

He reached out to take Gibbs' hand and entwine their fingers, but the Captain's announcement about closing the cabin doors and preparing for takeoff forcibly reminded him they were in public.  He could get away with pretending to have fallen asleep on Gibbs' shoulder; holding hands was definitely pushing it.  

Tony curled his hand into a loose fist, aborting his earlier movement.  He told himself to be grateful for what he could get and just let it go. He flinched when he felt something light being draped over him, opening his eyes in surprise, moving instinctively to press against the wall.

"Shhh…it's okay," Gibbs soothed.  "It's okay.  Just a blanket."

Tony avoided looking at Gibbs, embarrassed by his reaction. It was a habit he couldn't seem to quite break.  The former Marine didn't comment.  His hand found Tony's under the blanket and squeezed once.  

"Go back to sleep.'

Tony sighed, his head once more coming to naturally rest on Gibbs' shoulder.  "Sneaky," he murmured just loud enough for his lover to hear.

"Sometimes sneaky is good," Gibbs returned quietly, thumb moving to lightly caress the back of Tony's knuckles.  

Tony smiled.  Sneaky could definitely be a good thing.  No doubt about it.

He slept through the stewardess offering drinks and pretzels.  He slept through the bit of turbulence they encountered.  Tony didn't stir until he heard Gibbs calling his name in hushed tones meant to get his attention without startling him.  

He blinked.  Tony rubbed at his eyes, hating the gritty feel.  He yawned, straightening up.

"We there?"  

Gibbs started folding the blanket.  "Landing in ten."  

Tony grunted in acknowledgement.  He glanced at his watch.  They should be able to avoid most of the usual traffic; he hoped.  His stomach growled, startling him with its volume and intensity.

"You eat today?"

"Wasn't hungry."

Gibbs frowned at him.  "Tony-"

"I'll eat when we get home," Tony promised.  Louisa had left something in the fridge he was sure.  Something that might even be tempting enough he could keep his promise.  

The plane landed smoothly and taxied into the gate.  Tony waited in his seat while people around them immediately stood up, impatient to be gone.  He knew it would be a good ten minutes before the aisle cleared enough for them to even think about getting off the plane.  

Once there was enough space, Gibbs stood up and Tony followed.  Abby and McGee made their way down the aisle in front of them, Ducky and Palmer just a few paces further ahead.  Tony wasn't really surprised to see the Director waiting for them as they left the ramp and entered the concourse.  

"Jethro we need to talk a-"

"It will all in my report."  Gibbs cut her off.

Her eyes flashed.  "Somehow I doubt that."

He gave her a hard look of his own, but didn't contradict her.  Sheppard's mouth tightened in a look Tony knew likely didn't bode well.  He wondered what the odds were they'd get into some heated discussion right here and now.  His money was on Gibbs not making a scene but he couldn't see the former Marine backing down either.

Palmer was sticking close to Ducky, like a second shadow.  McGee eyed both Gibbs and the Director warily, while Abby looked on with avid interest.   Tony knew whose side she'd be betting on.  

Tony's stomach rumbled again, neatly cutting through the tense tableau.  "Didn't get breakfast or lunch," he offered with a small shrug when Sheppard glared at him.  

"Are you still feeling poorly, Anthony?"  Ducky asked, his expression concerned.

"I'm fine, Ducky."  Tony was quick to reassure the ME. There wasn't anything the older man could do to fix this.  Only time would do that.  "Just…today.  You know?"

"I do indeed, my boy."  Ducky's tone was a blend of understanding and sadness.  "I believe that is a sentiment we all share."  

He looked pointedly at the director.  "Whatever needs to be settled, my dear, can wait another day, I'm sure."  His gaze shifted to take in the milling crowd of people moving around them.  "And airing one's laundry in public is best left to a clothes line, wouldn't you agree?"

Sheppard had the good grace to look embarrassed.  It had to be Ducky's British upbringing, Tony decided.  The man could put people in their place and still sound so damn polite about it.

"Tomorrow.  Nine. My office."  She ordered Gibbs.  

"Yes, Ma'am."  Gibbs responded smoothly, no hint of disrespect or anger in his voice.  Tony thought it was a neat trick.  

She turned neatly on her heel and walked away.  Tony traded a look with McGee, mutual agreement passing between them.  Sheppard was nothing like Morrow, that was for certain, and avoiding her was definitely going to be the best way to go.  

Without bags, getting through the airport and to the parking deck was decidedly easy.  Ducky's classic vehicle stood out as an exotic, gleaming thing of beauty among the boring, indistinct sedans parked around it.  It made Tony miss his old car and realize he really did need to start seriously looking for a new one.

Gibbs' car was in the row behind where Ducky had parked, only two spaces away from McGee's.  The utilitarian, no frills, reliable vehicle suited Gibbs, Tony thought.  He couldn't see the older man driving anything flashy or developing the same affinity for a car that he had for his boat.  

"Please remember to eat something, Anthony."  Ducky requested as he keyed open the driver's side door.  "It won't do for you to get sick."

"I'll make sure he does, Duck."  Gibbs responded.  He used the remote key mechanism to unlock the doors to his car.  "Get in, DiNozzo."

There was no arguing with that.  Tony waved to McGee and Abby.  He nodded to Palmer as the assistant ME got in to Ducky's car.  Tony settled into the passenger seat, what he privately thought of as his spot.  

Gibbs got in but didn't immediately start the car.  He waited until the others had pulled out before turning to face Tony.  

"Boss?"

Gibbs leaned over, hands cupping Tony's face.  Blue eyes searched green.  Tony had no idea what Gibbs was looking for, so he simply waited.

"I love you, Tony DiNozzo."  

"I know."  Tony smiled.  "Love you too."

"Good."  Gibbs kissed him chastely.  "Let's go home."

If home was where the heart is, well, then in every way that mattered, Tony was already home.  The sentiment was just a bit too mushy for Tony to actually say aloud.  So he opted for simply kissing Gibbs back.  

"Yeah.  Let's go home."

Katherine's NCIS Story Page