Levon took a slow deep breath, drawing in the chilly pre-dawn air before releasing it with a sigh. The eastern sky was only beginning to lighten, showing the barest hint of the rising sun. It was early, even by his usual standards, but Levon had given up trying to sleep.

The current bout of insomnia started not long after some of Joe's family had descended on Houston, desperate to reassure themselves he really was alive. Levon didn't begrudge them their need to reconnect with Joe and make sure he was going to be okay. They loved him; it was natural they'd want to see for themselves reports of his death were exaggerated. Their presence upset the usual routine, but Levon had sort of expected that. Things hadn't exactly been normal prior to their arrival anyway.

Joe was still recovering from being shot. And Levon admitted, at least to himself, he was still trying to deal with being told his lover was dead. He knew it annoyed Joe that he'd been treating him with kid gloves and had spent the first few days he was back acting like they were joined at the hip. Levon tried to keep from doing it, not wanting to upset Joe more than he already was. He tried not to say anything about how devastated he'd been, how lost and alone. It was so hard to act as though his whole world hadn't shattered.

He still hadn't figured out exactly how to put all the pieces back together when a small horde of people came in from Chicago. Levon was relieved that Rosa had been there to ride herd on most of them. He couldn't prove it but the Texan was fairly certain she'd been the one to keep the LaFiamma clan from fully exploring his house or looking too closely at the obvious. The last thing he'd wanted to explain was why Joe's clothes filled the closet in the master bedroom and there was no obvious sign of the guest room ever being used.

She also made sure none of them lingered when it was time for bed at night or pushed to stay. It was her place she told them in no uncertain terms to take care of Joe each night and they needed to head back to their respective hotel rooms. As far as most of them were aware, Joe was spending the nights in 'his room', while Rosa made use of the master bedroom and Levon bunked on the couch.

Levon closed his eyes with a tired sigh. He was grateful he could at least curl up with Joe at night. He wasn't sure he'd have been able to deal with it if he'd really been forced to sleep on the couch.

He was profoundly grateful the LaFiammas didn't think to question Joe's presence at the ranch any more than their coworkers had. No one even asked why, with the fire that destroyed his place having been more than a year ago, Joe still didn't have an apartment of his own. Everyone seemed content to let financial issues be the reason for their cohabitation without delving further. Levon snickered, amused in spite of himself with how short-sighted people could be; but he had good reason to be grateful for it, so he wasn't going to complain.

As far as Levon knew for certain, only Rosa and Joe's youngest sister, Maria, knew he and Joe were more than just coworkers and friends. Some of the others might have suspected, but they didn't say anything outright. Levon was content to let things stay that way until Joe was ready to broach the subject openly with his relatives. Coming out of the closet to his entire family after most of them believed he'd died wasn't exactly what Levon would consider good timing. No--it was definitely better to wait on that revelation.

He was equally content to leave most of their coworkers in the dark as well. Annie knew. Joanne knew. It was enough. Or it had been. Except he wasn't sure that it was anymore. Discretion came with its own set of problems. Not the least of which having been recently brought to his attention by Joe's Aunt Teresa.

He tried not to let it bother him that Teresa seemed to see her nephew's 'near death experience' as a valid reason for him to 'settle down'. It wasn't like they could tell her that Joe was already in a committed relationship without her naturally asking who. Levon grimaced. He had no trouble picturing her reaction to that bit of news--especially since she'd expressed her opinion several times with regard to Joe finding a nice young woman to marry and start making babies with.

Even with her now safely back in Chicago, her comments lingered, making Levon uneasy. Joe had never said he wanted to have children of his own. He'd never said he didn't either, a small voice piped up, adding two cents Levon could have done without.

Levon shook his head. He kept telling himself Theresa's comments didn't mean anything. Not even when several of Joe's cousins had voiced various forms of agreement and encouragement, Joe never agreed with them. He never disagreed either, usually opting to change the subject or simply ignore them outright. Avoidance really had been the only good option, but Levon had found himself wishing his lover would tell them just once to shut the hell up about wives and kids and trying to run his life. He would have liked to hear his lover openly say he was committed to Levon and they could stop trying to find him someone to settle down with.

Levon sighed again, telling himself to stop being foolish. Joe was happy with their relationship-he knew that--but the question of was it enough kept circling back to prod Levon when he least expected it.

Looking back on the four days the LaFiamma family had been in Houston, it was obvious Joe loved the near-chaos his large family created. For all his enjoyment and delight, their presence had also worn him out. Which was probably a good thing since it meant Joe was in bed far earlier than normal and slept soundly while he was there.

Maybe that weird dichotomy of energy and exhaustion was how it was supposed to be. As an only child who was the son of an only child, Levon had no real experience to compare it with. Maybe that was what Joe really wanted. Maybe what they had together wasn't as satisfying or fulfilling as it could be. Maybe all it took for him to realize that was for someone like Teresa to point it out; for his cousins to talk about how happy they were with their lives.

Joe was a good looking man. Intelligent and funny. Charming and talented. He could have is pick of any woman he wanted. Could get himself a house with a picket fence and a dog. Levon laughed softly, unable to picture his lover in domestic bliss in the suburbs. He just couldn't see it.

Joe had been sad to see everyone leave. Not devastated, just...sad. It was natural that he'd miss them. It didn't automatically translate into his being unhappy.

Levon thought Joe might have been a bit relieved too. He couldn't be sure. Levon might be projecting his own emotions onto his lover. The house had never seemed so small; ten people took up a lot of room. Levon still wasn't clear on how the six they'd expected had grown to so many. Or why Rafe and Maria, two relatives he knew and liked, hadn't been included in the group.

Levon tried not to show it when they'd left, but he'd been overjoyed to have them gone. It was so nice to come home to a once more quiet, organized household. No more sounds of multiple conversations and too many people taking up space. Just him and Joe, the way it should be--the way he liked it to be. Levon's grip on the railing tightened as his thoughts circled once more back to the starting point: wondering if Joe was really happy with the status quo, if his lover wanted or needed more.

The back door creaked and Levon glanced toward it, not entirely surprised to see Joe standing there. He smiled in welcome.

"Kind of early for you to be up."

"You too." Joe scrutinized his face and Levon was damn glad the dim lighting would hide the dark circles he knew had taken up residence under his eyes. "You okay, Cowboy?"

"I'm fine."

Joe shivered as he stepped out on the porch. "You should have a jacket."

"Thought you said it never got cold here." Levon chuckled. "And I'm not the one in bare feet."

"Couldn't find my slippers."

"Small miracle we can find anything at all." Levon rolled his eyes. Teresa had taken it upon herself to do the laundry, rearrange the kitchen and had started making plans for the living room. It was only Rosa's quick thinking and firm hand that kept Teresa from taking over more than she had.

Levon made a note to send flowers to Rosa as a thank you.

"Sometimes I think Aunt Teresa still hasn't realized I'm an adult." Joe gave him a rueful look. "Sorry about her-"

"Not your fault." Levon waved off the apology. "Didn't mind the whole rearranging thing as much as I hated the whole scented candle thing."

One of Joe's nieces had insisted on burning at least one candle the entire time. Levon hated patchouli and having the scent permeate his home hadn't changed his mind any. He suspected she was smoking pot but in the interest of keeping the peace for the duration of the family's visit he hadn't said anything.

"We'll leave the windows open for a few days." Joe grimaced. "Should help."

"God I hope so."

Levon ran a hand through his hair, fighting back a yawn. He was tired. The nightmares he'd had when he thought Joe was dead hadn't really gone away, but he had learned how to keep quiet about them. So far he hadn't woken Joe, although, it could be his family wearing him out that kept his lover from waking more than any effort on Levon's part to stifle his screams. It wasn't like Levon actually slept long enough to really dream much lately; more cat naps, an hour or two here and there.

"Come back to bed, Cowboy."

Levon shook his head. "Just going to be up again in an hour."

Going back to bed so close to when he normally got up just seemed pointless. Not that he had to go to work today. Joanne had told him to take the entire week off, and Levon hadn't objected. Just letting Joe out of his sight for more than a few minutes, even with his family around, had him breaking out into a cold sweat.

Levon had forced himself not to hover, tried to act as normal as possible, not wanting to keep annoying Joe by acting as though they were wearing the same pants. He couldn't exactly be clingy with Joe's family around anyway. So Levon had found things to do in the barn that didn't need doing, working with Gabriel more than he had ever before. He'd started jogging again, an activity he hadn't engaged in since college. He sought out ways to keep Joe's family busy and entertained, got a few of them out of the house so it wasn't so much of a zoo.

Joe held out his hand, concern readily apparent in his blue eyes. "You look like you could do with a little more sleep."

Levon yawned widely and shivered. He could do with more than a little, but he didn't think it would work that way. It hadn't so far.

"What time to do ya go for physical therapy?" Levon asked, ignoring Joe's outstretched hand.

Joe frowned, letting his hand drop. "Not until one."

Today was Joe's first appointment. It had been downright painful keeping himself from demanding to go along or insist on driving Joe there. Fortunately, Joe had asked him to come along, since he already had experience with the whole process and knew just how exhausting the first time would be.

Joe moved closer. He slowly raised his hand to cup Levon's cheek. "Tell me what's wrong."

"Nothing's wrong."

"Liar."

Levon didn't resist when Joe drew him into a gentle embrace. He rested his head on Joe's good shoulder. He sighed.

"Talk to me, Levon," Joe urged softly.

Better to just bite the bullet, Levon decided. Give in a little. He wouldn't have to tell Joe everything, just enough to pacify him. "Please don't take this the wrong way, but dealing with all yer family is...hard on a man."

"That wasn't even close to being all of them, Cowboy. Was only most of them." Joe chuckled, his cheek rubbing against Levon's hair. "I've known them all my life and they can be a bit much for me at times. I wouldn't be at all surprised if you thought a herd of stampeding cattle were easier to deal with."

He patted Levon's back, a gesture meant to soothe as well as comfort. "Don't think I mentioned I was duly impressed with how well you handled them. Know you aren't keen on crowds and noise in general."

"Kept wanting to tell them all ta shut the hell up," Levon admitted quietly, unconsciously resting more of his weight against Joe.

It was another reason jogging had seemed like a good idea--he got a chance to work off his irritation without actually yelling at anyone. And all the jogging and activity he engaged in outside was a good cover for his recent weight loss. It was only a few pounds, but the stress of dealing with the situation had affected his appetite the same way it had his ability to sleep.

"Yer Uncle Mario must be goin' deaf," Levon mumbled. "Didn't even know the TV volume could get that high."

Joe laughed softly. "It's the only way he can drown out Aunt Teresa."

Levon could sympathize then. "And your niece...the little one with the orange hair-"

"Emma."

"Yeah." Levon nodded, refusing to ask what she'd done to get her hair that color in the first place. "That kid followed me around like a lost puppy. What the hell was that about?"

Joe snickered. "I think she has a crush on you, Cowboy."

"She's not even half my age for crying out loud." Levon pulled back, rolling his eyes at Joe. "More likely she was tryin' ta figure out how an old man like me could even still be walking around without a cane."

Joe grinned. "You don't know much about kids do you, Cowboy?"

"No, I don't." Levon winced at how sharp he sounded. With all Teresa's harping on Joe starting a family, that particular shortcoming wasn't one Levon cared to have pointed out.

"Easy, Cowboy, it was just an observation."

"Sorry." Levon looked away. "Didn't mean ta snap at you."

"I know." Joe pulled him back into loose hug. "You are always cranky when you're tired."

Levon grimaced. Cranky? He wasn't cranky. He opened his mouth to say so, but shut it when Joe started talking again.

"Frankly, I'd be worried if you knew much about the inner workings of a teenage girl's mind." Joe raised a hand and massaged the back of Levon's neck. "Takes a long time to figure out a teenager...if you ever do."

Levon could feel himself relaxing under Joe's steady, sure touch; he knew Joe was smiling even if he couldn't see it. He'd missed being this close. The four days Joe's family had been around felt so much longer than that.

"Suffice to say that at the ripe old age of 15, Emma is sure she's too mature for the boys her age. So she's looking at older guys. Guys who have more to talk about than sports, that don't have zits, or sit in her algebra class. Men who didn't know her when she had braces and before she got contacts."

Joe pulled him closer. "Can't say that I fault her taste in men. You are very easy on the eyes."

Levon could feel his face warm. "Sweet talker."

"Doesn't make it any less true." Joe stepped back and placed a kiss on the tip of Levon's nose. "Come back to bed with me."

"Joe-"

"I sleep better with you there, and you aren't the only one who could do with a little more sleep."

While he knew the statements were true, Levon was aware they were also a ploy to get Joe's way. He also knew searching for him was the only reason Joe was up so early. The blond had been careful the last few days not to get up before his usual time, but this morning he couldn't lay in bed and stare at the ceiling any longer. It wouldn't hurt anything to lie down and watch Joe sleep for awhile. He could do that. It wasn't like Joe was going to give up and leave him to his own devices anyway.

"Okay." Levon smiled before giving Joe a quick kiss.

He found his spirit lighter when Joe grinned back at him. Making Joe happy--even of only for a moment--always made Levon feel better. He let Joe take his hand and lead him back to their bedroom.

"Lay down," Joe instructed, lightly patting Levon's ass.

Before Levon could question where Joe was going he realized his lover was drawing the shades, shutting out the faint light of dawn.

They rarely saw the need to close the shades. Their nearest neighbor was over half mile away, and a fencerow of trees that marked the property boundary line effectively blocking the line of site to their bedroom windows, so they rarely needed to draw the shades for privacy. The morning light was something Levon liked to wake up with. By the time the sun was high enough to reach what was Joe's side of the bed it was usually time for him to get up. With the shades down, the room plunged into darkness.

"Tryin' to slow down the start of the day, are ya?"

He could just make out Joe's shrug as his lover sat on the bed. "Easier to sleep when the light isn't blinding you."

"Wouldn't know." Levon chuckled. "Never tried."

"Shaddup and lay down."

Levon tossed off a sloppy, teasing salute, lying down as instructed. He sighed, trying to relax. He didn't really want to appear restless--it was uncharacteristic for him to be that way and it would worry Joe.

Having Joe lie down next to him helped, made it easier to settle. Joe pulled the comforter up over Levon. He instinctively curled closer, head resting on Joe's good shoulder, his right arm wrapping around Joe's abdomen.

Joe raised a hand to play with his hair, running fingers through loose curls. Levon smiled when Joe started to hum a lullaby, singing a line or two in Italian. He was pretty sure it would be a wasted effort, but he appreciated the sentiment.

Levon closed his eyes, welcoming the sense of well being and lassitude that was slowly overriding his restless mind. His last conscious thought before sleep claimed him was how there was nothing better in his life than moments like these, and how much he hoped Joe felt the same way.

Joe adjusted the strap on his sling and grimaced in annoyance. His shoulder felt better when he wore it but the strap was hot and uncomfortable. He'd managed to avoid wearing it the past few days because Aunt Teresa hadn't let him so much as lift a finger anyway. God. He loved her, but he was glad she was gone.

He ran a hand through his hair, checking his appearance in the mirror. Not that he had to look good for physical therapy. Odds were he'd end up looking like road kill by the time he was done anyway, but that was no reason to leave the house looking like a slob.

Joe glanced toward the bedroom. Ordinarily Levon would have been ready before him, and teasing him about taking so long to get his act together. But then, his lover usually slept through the night.

Joe shook his head. He knew Levon was having trouble and he didn't need to be a genius to figure out why. Levon was still dealing with the aftermath of Joe being declared dead. The nightmares had tapered off, but Joe knew the added stress of his family being in town and at the ranch had kept Levon from dealing with it and getting back to normal.

He really wished Levon would talk to him, but forcing his lover to communicate wasn't something Joe had much luck with. He had to wait until Levon was ready and hope he recognized it when his lover was prepared to talk. He snorted. The man was just too damn stubborn for his own good.

The worst part about it all in Joe's opinion was he knew Levon was probably staying quiet about his problems so as not to upset Joe. Joe rolled his eyes at his reflection. How could letting him help be worse than suffering through it alone? Some days he'd swear his partner had a martyr complex.

A moment of honest reflection forced him to admit to being prone to doing the same thing.

"We are definitely meant for one another," Joe muttered. He adjusted the sling once more, seeking a comfortable position. "Maybe I should just get him drunk," Joe mused aloud. Alcohol had a tendency to get Levon to talk more freely. Not much, but more so than he usually did.

Of course, alcohol came with its own drawbacks. In the time they'd been together, Joe hadn't seen Levon drink the hard stuff very often. It was a good thing, because when Levon did, his usual laid back demeanor vanished. The cowboy wasn't generally violent but he could be mean, his tone becoming harsh and biting, his body language all but demanding he be left alone.

Joe decided he'd save getting Levon drunk as a last resort. The last thing he wanted to do was cause more harm trying to fix the problem. Hopefully, Levon would be ready to talk before Joe got desperate.

"Ya 'bout done primping in there?"

Joe shook his head and laughed silently. At least that much was normal. "I am not primping."

"Well what would ya call it then?" Levon asked, leaning his shoulder casually against the door jamb, expression of fond amusement gracing his features.

Joe rolled his eyes. He hadn't heard his lover walk down the hall. Levon could be as stealthy as a cat when he wanted to be. His sneaking out of bed in the morning was proof of that. It was usually only after he was gone that Joe was aware of being alone.

"Making sure I look all right is not primping."

"Pretty sure Webster would disagree with ya, Joe." Levon raised an eyebrow. "Makin' sure ya look all right should take two minutes. Five on the outside. Not fifteen." He tapped his watch for emphasis. "Primping is what yer doing," Levon declared with a smile.

"Have I mentioned lately you are a real pain in the ass?" Joe bit the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling. It felt good to play like this.

"Not since your family was here." Levon's smile widened. "Rosa doesn't like you to swear. And unlike me, she knows what all that mumbling under yer breath in Italian means."

Joe laughed and pushed Levon out of the doorway. "Shaddup."

"This mean you're finally ready to leave?"

Joe sighed. "Ready as I'll ever be."

"Won't be that bad, Joe." Levon gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Not for you," Joe grumbled.

He hated physical therapy. He knew it was necessary and was more than willing to do what it took to get back to 100%, but having to start out slow always frustrated the hell out of him. He worked out regularly and was used to easily handling forty or fifty pound dumbbells. Working with five pound weights and rubber bands just made him feel weak, like he'd lost so much ground.

"Don't push too hard." Levon's tone was firm. "It'll just set you back further."

"I know that," Joe snapped, irritated by the unnecessary reminder. "I've done this before."

"I know." Levon held up both hands, palms outward. "It's why I know you'll push too hard. You always want to do too much too fast."

"Hello pot," Joe muttered.
"Didn't say I was any different." Levon chuckled. "But you're supposed to be smarter than me."

Joe tsk'd. "Thought I was the pretty one."

"Yeah, that too." Levon grinned. He jerked his head toward the door. "C'mon. Sooner ya get started, sooner you'll get cleared for full duty."

Joe knew it would be awhile before he was going to do more than ride a desk, but at the moment even paperwork was looking attractive. He was ready to get back into the swing of things. Just going to work in the morning with Levon would help get them closer to their normal routine again. He'd already gotten the okay to go back to the office next week, at least for half days.

Joe followed Levon out of the house and slid into the passenger side of the Jimmy. He smiled, feeling better just for how utterly normal and right it felt to be back in his usual place. His family hadn't let him do much more than lay on the couch. Every time Levon left without him to run some errand, go jogging, or play tour guide for one of Joe's family, Joe had struggled not to resent being left out or get jealous that his lover was letting someone else ride shotgun. Shotgun in the Jimmy was his seat, damn it.

Levon shot him a quizzical look.

Joe shrugged unsure how to articulate what he was feeling. "Missed this."

Levon smiled shyly. "Me too."

Once Levon had backed out of the driveway he reached over and captured Joe's hand. He held it loosely in his own. They hadn't held hands since before his family arrived, and Joe realized he'd missed that simple gesture as much as he had riding in the Jimmy. It had to have been even worse for Levon who often communicated more with touch and action than he did with words. By hiding their relationship from most of his family, Joe had effectively muzzled his lover.

"I'm sorry."

Levon raised an eyebrow. "For what?"

"For hiding us from my family." If he wasn't such a coward more of them would know and they wouldn't have had to hide.

"Joe, that ain't something you got to apologize for." Levon squeezed his hand. "We talked about how ta tell yer family, when and who and why...pretty sure we covered all the bases. It's okay."

"No it's not." Joe shook his head. "When we talked about that," he waved a hand in frustration, "all this crap wasn't even considered."

"Gotta admit I have a whole new definition for worst case scenario." Levon's expression was wry, and his tone struggling for light and teasing. He didn't quite reach it.

Joe glared, angry at Levon for even trying to make light of something that clearly still affected him. "It's not funny."

"No, it isn't." Levon sighed. A muscle flexed in his cheek as he clenched his jaw and then released it.

When he tried to pull hand away, Joe tightened his grip, refusing to let go. "Levon-- please."

Joe wasn't entirely sure what he was asking for, but the plea was enough for Levon to stop pulling away. He knew they couldn't really get into it here. Not in a moving vehicle. Not when they had to be somewhere else. Not when Levon was so clearly unready.

"I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing," Levon snapped at him, giving Joe a dirty look. "You didn't do anything wrong."

Then why the hell do I feel like I'm being punished, Joe thought. A sharp inhalation from Levon was Joe's first clue he'd actually spoken the thought aloud. Shit.

"I didn't mean-"

Levon jerked his hand away from Joe, holding it up in a classic stop motion. "Don't. Just don't."

Joe opened his mouth and then snapped it shut. He didn't know what to say anyway. How was he supposed to fix this? He wasn't even sure how things got so messed up.

The silence that filled the cab was deafening. Joe almost wished Levon had turned on the radio--he'd willingly listen to some stupid country song over this painful, tense silence. Joe fiddled with his sling strap again, unable to sit still and not knowing what to do. He hated feeling so uncertain. He just wanted things to be normal again.

Levon brought the Jimmy to a stop at a red light. He turned to look at Joe. "I'm not mad at you."

Joe arched an eyebrow. "You sure about that?"

"Don't blame ya for askin' me that." The blond sighed softly, and then reached out to gently cup Joe's cheek. "Thought I was doin' what you wanted."

Joe frowned. "I don't-"

"I shouldn't have said that about the whole worse case scenario thing." Levon bit his lower lip. "But when yer family was here you kept tellin' them ta stop making a big deal out of you being--," Levon swallowed hard, "declared dead." He took a breath, expression morphing into something carefully neutral.

Joe winced internally when he saw that look. He hadn't wanted his family to bring up constant reminders to Levon about what had happened. Joe hadn't meant for his lover to think it was wrong to be so deeply affected by the event, or that he was dismissing the impact his 'death' had on Levon as unworthy of consideration. He didn't think it healthy to dwell on his 'death' when Joe hadn't really died.

Joe opened his mouth to say something, anything that would reassure Levon, but before he could speak a horn began blaring behind them. He glanced up and realized the light was green. Levon immediately refocused his attention on the road and driving. Joe cursed silently--the moment was lost.

He took consolation in the fact that the earlier tension and painful silence had definitely eased. He held out his hand, immeasurably relieved when Levon took it without hesitation. He squeezed Levon's hand, trying to convey through touch what he hadn't had a chance to actually say.

Joe tried not to let the lack of his normal rapport with Levon worry him unduly. Things weren't quite where they should be, but Joe was confident they'd get there eventually. He wasn't going to give up. Joe was too stubborn for that. He reminded himself pushing would do more damage. Better to give Levon a little space for now.

To help take is mind off Levon and their unresolved issues, he opted to focus on his up coming therapy session. The physical therapist his doctor had recommended had an office just down the street from the hospital complex located in one of the new gyms. Joe hoped the recommendation wasn't just because of the convenient location.

"Heard good things about this place from some o' the guys on the force," Levon offered as they pulled into the lot.

Joe raised an eyebrow. He wasn't really surprised Levon would check out the facility; they looked out for each other whenever possible, but Joe was curious as to who he'd talked to. "Who'd you ask?"

"Joyce. Eastman. Menendez--"

"Damn," Joe whispered. "This job is more dangerous than I thought."

"Wasn't the job, Joe." Levon chuckled. "Joyce tore ligaments in his knee playing soccer with his son. Eastman had rotator cuff problems from way back. And Menendez broke his leg at a bachelor party."

Joe never quite understood how his partner could know so much about the people they worked with. He rarely saw the man indulge in idle conversation or gossip, and Levon wasn't a social butterfly. Even though he had no idea how Levon did it, Joe trusted him to know.

"So what did they have to say?"

"Said the staff was good. Seemed to know their stuff." Levon shrugged his right shoulder, rolling it slightly. "Got the latest equipment. Joyce was impressed with the whirlpool. Eastman liked the masseuse they had."

Joe nodded. "What about Menendez?"

"He asked one of the PT's out."

Joe rolled is eyes. "That's a ringing endorsement?"

"I don't know." Levon gave him an amused look. "Just relaying to you what he told me. But I'm thinkin' her turning him down shows they hire people with good sense."

Joe laughed softly, but sobered quickly as Levon pulled into the parking lot. He squeezed the hand he still held. "You going to hang around?"

"Planned to." Levon smiled, leaning over to give him a quick kiss on the cheek. "C'mon, let's go see what Torquemada has in store for you."

Joe snorted. "Torquemada?"

"You'll be calling him worse 'fore the day is over."

Probably, Joe thought with a silent sigh. As much as he hated the entire process, he knew it was necessary. He needed to get back to work. Needed to make sure Levon wasn't off doing reckless things without him there.

Joe took a deep breath, and opened the door.

"Let's go do this thing."

Levon set a fast pace, long legs warming up quickly as he ran. It had taken everything he had not to give his anger free rein on the trip back from the physical therapist. He needed to move, to vent all that pent up emotion.

After any other PT session Joe would have been bitching and moaning, but he couldn't stop raving about Sarah. Sarah this and Sarah that. Levon had wanted to yell at him to just shut the hell up already. He'd been there, watched the whole session. It wasn't like Levon really needed a blow by blow recount.

So she was nice and funny and had a great smile. So what? What the hell did that have to do with anything?

Levon unconsciously lengthened his stride, not caring about the blistering heat or that he'd forgotten his water bottle. He snarled as the image of Sarah's hands all over Joe came to mind. Was it really necessary to touch him that much? And what the hell was up with her running her fingers through his hair? How was that professional?

Her wearing a little cross necklace just added to his ire. Levon would bet money she was catholic. Probably wore one of those stupid little plaid skirts that Joe's Aunt had made such a big deal out of having Emma wear. Teresa would love to have someone like Sarah dating Joe.

Teresa would probably start pushing for babies the second she met Sarah. Levon could just hear the older woman raving about what beautiful children they'd have. She'd think Sarah was perfect. Someone Joe could finally settle down with.

Levon hated how quickly Joe had connected with her. And felt immediately ashamed of himself for thinking that. He wanted the best for his lover. Only the best. Having a good rapport with Sarah would definitely help him get back to work sooner.

Levon knew when he'd have to help Joe at home with the exercise Sarah had shown him Joe would whine and moan. Levon knew it hurt. He knew all too well it wasn't fun. He hated knowing he was going to be the 'bad guy'. Sarah would be all sweetness and light. She'd get willing cooperation with nothing more than a smile while Levon got snarls and curses.

Levon panted as he pushed himself to go faster. He wanted to be able to just outrun his thoughts, turn his mind off the way he usually did but couldn't seem to quite get into his normal zone. It shouldn't be this hard; the whole thing shouldn't bother him so much. He knew that.

It was stupid and juvenile and he had to find a way to deal with it. Joe was going to be seeing Sarah for several weeks at least. It wasn't going to help if Levon couldn't be civil to the woman. Not that he really cared if she knew he didn't like her, but he didn't want Joe to know he didn't like her.

He grimaced. Joe would likely want to start driving himself there as soon as possible. He was an independent son of a bitch that way. There was no way Levon was going to tolerate his being with Sarah alone. Not just no, hell no.

He'd barely kept himself from smacking her hands away from Joe the whole time he watched the therapy session. He wanted Sarah to know Joe was his. Let her go find someone else to flirt with. The place was full of eligible men, and most of them sure looked interested in her. She could go after one of them for crying out loud.

A stitch in Levon's side forced him to slow down. He glanced at his watch surprised to find himself so far along his usual jogging route sooner than usual. His lips curled in a wry smile realizing anger made for a damn fine motivator and did wonders for his time. Although the pain radiating out from his left side told him that wasn't necessarily a good thing. Damn that hurt.

Levon slowed a little more, wiping his sweaty face with his shirt. He regretted not bringing his water bottle, but figured he'd survive until he got back to the house. He took a deep breath, forcing himself to keep jogging. It was only another mile or so to the half-way point where he could turn around. He was too stubborn to cut his run short or give in just because it hurt.

He rounded the corner, keeping a wary eye out for the black lab that always barked at him. The dog was harmless enough; Levon was pretty sure it liked to leap out at him just to see how high it could make him jump not out of any real malice or viciousness. Sneaky bastard, he thought with fond amusement. He wondered who the hell the dog scared before he got back into jogging.

Levon managed not to jump when the dog sprung up from behind a small bush near the picket fence. He grinned at the lab and waved. "Better luck next time," he panted, continuing on around the block and heading back to his house.

The pain in his side eased but didn't completely vanish. Levon chose to ignore it. Physical pain was familiar, something he'd handled in the past and could deal with. He wished everything else was handled as easily.

In a strange moment of sacrilegious humor, Levon realized he had something in common with Jesus' disciples. He wondered if they'd ridden the same roller coaster when they found out about Jesus' resurrection. He snorted. Teresa would no doubt consider him damned for even thinking such a thing. She'd likely damn him for far greater crimes if she knew him better.

"Fuck you, Teresa," Levon hissed, unable not to give voice to his anger and frustration, once more increasing his pace. Who the hell was she to judge?

She, and others like her in Joe's family, was a staunch Catholic contingent who seemed capable of reconciling the family business with their faith, but wouldn't give the same consideration to what Levon considered a lesser crime. How the hell could his being with Joe be more of a sin than murder and prostitution? Did these people even know what sort of hypocrites they were? Did they even care?

Of course not, Levon snarled. She wanted Joe married, having children, leading a nice, 'normal' life. And Joe had conveniently found himself a woman who would likely meet with most of his family's approval. Shit, she was even from Illinois originally. Probably would love to go visit Chicago

And why shouldn't Joe take the easy way for once? Do what was expected instead of fighting? Levon flinched, instinctively dodging the emotional pain that came with the thought. He'd never really thought of their relationship as being the hard way, but it certainly wasn't conventional. And definitely didn't fit what most of Joe's family would label as acceptable. Wasn't what most of their friends would consider normal either.

It worked for them, Levon reminded himself forcefully. The hell with what anyone else thought they should do. It worked. He wasn't going to give up what they had without a fight. Sarah and Teresa could just kiss his ass. Joe was his.

The stitch in his side intensified. Levon gasped, nearly doubling over. He cursed as he felt wave of nausea hit him. Shit. He really should have paced himself better. And brought that water bottle or maybe agreed to Joe's suggestion to put off jogging until later in the day when it was cooler.

He was too worked up to put off jogging, and too pissed to listen anything Joe suggested. Levon had just needed to get away for a little bit. Screw his head on straight. The last thing he wanted was to blow up at Joe.

Levon breathed through the pain, straightening up. He pressed his hand into his side, trying to ease the pain as he walked slowly. At least he wasn't too far from home.

"Stupid son of a bitch," Levon muttered, disappointed in himself. He knew better than this. Usually. Levon shook his head feeling equal parts foolish and pissed. He sighed. He hated feeling so out of control.

The pain in his side eased, but he wasn't stupid enough to try jogging again. He'd have to settle for walking home. Levon thought about rubbing the sweat off his face, but realized his shirt was soaked so it really wouldn't help. He ran a hand through his hair, sighing when he lifted the wet curls off his neck. He needed a hair cut.

As he walked, Levon was increasingly conscious of the heat and humidity. Mother Minnie would say the air was almost heavy enough wear. He really was an idiot to run in this weather.

Levon's breathing returned to normal as he continued walking slowly, the pain in his side easing. He still felt vaguely nauseous and a headache was starting behind his eyes. Nothing a little water and getting inside where it was cooler wouldn't fix.

He glanced at his watch. The good time he'd been making was shot now. This was definitely not one for the record books.

As he got closer to home, Levon was surprised to see Joe pacing in the driveway. Concerned, he walked faster, calling out to his lover, "Joe? Something wrong?"

Joe whirled, storm gray eyes fixing on him with the intensity of a laser beam. "Is something wrong?!!" Joe stalked up to him. "You take off to go jogging when it's hotter than the fires of hell. You don't take any water with you. You're gone for more than an hour making me think you might just have keeled over from heat stroke. What could possibly be wrong?!"

Joe poked him hard in the chest with one finger. "Of all the asinine...idiotic things you've ever done, this has got to be--"

"Hey!" Levon protested, indignant, slapping Joe's hand away. "You got no call ta-"

"I sure as hell do," Joe snarled. "I was giving you another ten minutes before I took the Jimmy to go look for you."

"You aren't supposed to drive." It was inane and stupid to bring that up, but it was the first thing that came to mind, and it earned Levon another glare.

"I know that." Joe ran a hand through his hair, sighing heavily. "Damn it, Cowboy, it is too damn hot for you to just take off at a dead run."

Levon glared back at Joe. It wasn't like he hadn't already figured out that little detail for himself. But he wasn't going to admit it. "Not like you don't go jogging all the time."

"Not in the heat of the day, I don't."

"I made it there and back," Levon growled. "You didn't need to worry."

"Need to-" Joe waved both hands in a gesture of frustration and exasperation. "I wouldn't need to worry if you showed a little sense."

Levon's jaw clenched. A little sense? He wouldn't have even been out there if Joe hadn't been so keen on flirting with Sarah. If he'd told his Aunt Teresa to just fuck off. If he hadn't gotten shot and the FBI hadn't told everyone Joe was dead.

"What if you collapsed somewhere out there?" Joe shouted.

"Well then I guess it would have made it easy for you and Sarah to hook up, now wouldn't it?"

"What?" Joe shook his head, looking dumbfounded. "What the hell are you-"

"Don't give me that." Levon poked Joe in the chest, feeling a need to even the score, pissed that Joe would even pretend to be completely innocent. "You were flirting with her."

"You're jealous?" Joe stepped back, sounding far more surprised and confused than Levon expected. "You're jealous of Sarah?"

"You thought I wouldn't care?" Levon's hands curled into fists. "You thought I'd be okay with her just putting her hands all over you?"

"It's physical therapy, Levon. She's supposed to touch me." Joe shook his head. "I've only just met her for god's sake."

"Like getting to know her would have slowed you down when ya first got here. Hell, you must have-" Levon stopped abruptly realizing too late where he'd been headed.

"I know when I first got here I was a little stupid with the whole date of the week thing, but you can not seriously think I would ever betray you?" Joe looked as though Levon had slapped him. "Do you really think I'd risk what we have for a roll in the hay with some stranger? Jesus, Levon--did this goddamn heat cook your brain while you were gone?"

Levon sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger, suddenly feeling tired and stupid. He hadn't meant to say any of that out loud. And he had no cause to hurt Joe by throwing his past in his face---maybe he really had cooked his brain.

He flinched when Joe reached out a hand to him. The pain in Joe's eyes made it clear his avoiding contact hurt his lover worse than his words had. Levon caught Joe's hand.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it." Levon hoped he sounded as sincere and earnest as he truly was.

"What the hell brought all that on?" Joe asked, concern overriding hurt and anger.

"It's nothing." Levon didn't even bother trying to smile knowing he couldn't make it look natural or believable.

"Don't tell me it's nothing, Cowboy." Joe's tone was not harsh but firm, he wasn't going to be brushed off. "You don't accuse me of looking to sleep around over nothing."

"Shouldn't have said that." Levon looked away.

"Damn right you shouldn't have." Joe tightened his hold on Levon's hand. "So start talking and tell me just what the hell is going on."

Levon bit his lower lip. "Joe-"

"Do not even think of lying to me." Joe growled. "I don't want some excuse, some stupid platitude, and I sure as hell don't want more silence. Talk to me, Levon. What the hell is going on with you?"

Levon took a breath. It was stupid. Saying it aloud wouldn't change that. If anything, he expected saying everything he was thinking and feeling would just make the situation worse. He turned to walk away, but Joe grabbed his arm.

"Don't you dare walk away from me."

Levon shrugged out of his hold. "Don't tell me what to do, LaFiamma."

"You have to stop doing this."

"Doin' what?" Levon stepped up to get right in Joe's face. "Stop actin' like I didn't see you bleeding you life out on the steps of that fucking courthouse? Stop actin' like I didn't freeze solid inside when they told me you were dead?" He moved forward forcing Joe to step back. "I should just pretend like I wasn't thinking of blowing my brains out damn near every minute for three days!!"

"Yes!!" Joe bumped his chest with his own, leaning in. "I was never dead, Lundy."

"I didn't know that!" Levon snarled. "For three days I thought ya were."

He stepped back to give himself more room to move, suddenly afraid to be so close. His fists clenched in anger and remembered pain. "Every damn time I wake up I'm scared ta death I dreamed you being alive, ya prick. Don't you get it!!"

He could almost see his words register with Joe and cursed himself for it. He hadn't meant to say any of that. It wasn't something Joe needed to know.

"Jesus, Levon," Joe moved to step closer and Levon instinctively backed away. He was still too keyed up to allow Joe within arm's reach.

"Why didn't you just tell me?"

"You were shot." Levon waved a hand, struggling to explain himself. "You didn't need my shit on top of that."

"We're partners, you idiot." Joe glared at him. "We're supposed to be in this together."

Levon snorted. "How can we be in anything together when your Aunt Teresa is planning yer weddin' and namin' yer children."

"What?" Joe shook his head.

"Half your family is sure you're straight." Levon snarled. "I'm nuthin' to them but your good buddy. The guy who put you up when yer apartment burned down."

Joe's mouth opened in an expression of almost comical surprise before he recovered, spitting out, "You were the one who said they didn't have to know if I wasn't ready to tell them!"

"Well maybe I was wrong." Levon ground out. Maybe there was more to Joe wanting to not tell the rest of his family? More than just being disowned or condemned? Did he ever want them all to know about his relationship with Levon? Was he ashamed of Levon? Ashamed of what they had together?

"You ever think how fucked up it is to have yer aunt in my house tellin' me it would be great if my lover got himself a nice Italian girl ta make babies with? Ya ever think maybe I didn't want to listen ta that shit?"

Levon clenched his fist, knuckles bleaching white. "Ya think I needed ta know she thought I wasn't good enough for you? Ya think I wanted her rearrangin' everything in MY house?! It's a wonder the damn busy body wasn't going through my underwear, for cryin' out loud."

"Your house? I thought it was OUR house!" Joe pointed a finger at Levon. "And you don't know Aunt Teresa well enough to bad mouth her like that. She means well."

"How the hell can I get to know her when she has no idea just who I am to you?" Levon resisted the urge to stamp his foot like an angry two year old. "I spent four days pretendin' to be something I'm not. I hate lying."

"Well it doesn't seem to be a problem for you at work!"

Levon stared at him. "You want to be out at work?" he asked quietly, gut clenching as he considered the implication telling everyone.

Joe opened his mouth, then snapped it shut. He sighed and took a deep breath, rubbing a hand over his face. "I don't know." Blue eyes met brown. "Do you really want me to come out to all of my family?"

"No." Levon shook his head. He knew how much they meant to Joe. It was too much too ask of him to risk that. "I meant it when I said ya could wait until you were ready. It's just..."

"Just what?"

"It's nothin'." Levon waved a hand. He'd already muddled everything by trying to explain. He didn't want to try again. He'd probably just make it worse.

"Damn it, Levon," Joe growled, stepping closer, "don't start that again."

Joe reached out; Levon reacted instinctively to Joe's tone and movement, too keyed up to realize the gesture was innocent, with no intent to harm. He blocked Joe's arm, while his other fist landed a solid hit to Joe's solar plexus. Levon managed to pull his punch at the last moment, but still drove the breath from his lover's lungs.

"Oh shit," Levon whispered, color draining from his face. "God, Joe...I didn't mean... I'm sorry..."

Joe straightened, pulling in a harsh breath. "It's okay, Levon."

No it wasn't okay. He'd hit Joe--deliberately. He hadn't done that since the first night when they ironed out their differences in the rain in a parking lot. Levon shook his head, backing away. He'd bottled it all up--all his hurt and anger, fear and confusion, disappointment and frustration-all if was safely contained. Then he was dumb enough to let the genie out of the bottle. And he knew, knew nothing good would come of it, nothing good ever had. His first instinct had been to hit, to lash out. He'd taken a cheap shot, just like his father would have.

Joe tried to close the distance, but Levon continued to retreat. He kept repeating, 'sorry' over and over. He bumped into the Jimmy and fumbled to open the door. Once inside he locked the door, trapping Joe safely outside.

He closed his eyes and rested his head against the steering wheel. He could hear Joe taping against the glass and calling his name softly, but Levon ignored him. He couldn't talk to him. He couldn't even look at him.

Levon gripped the steering wheel, reliving the moment when he'd struck his lover. He shook his head. No. He had to get away from Joe. He had to go now.

He fired up the Jimmy. Levon was startled and jumped when Joe slammed his hand against the window. His lover looked more scared and anxious than pissed, but Levon didn't hesitate to throw the truck into gear. He had to get away before Joe could do anything stupid to stop him.

He couldn't risk hurting Joe-more than he already had. He'd fucked up. Bad. He couldn't stay here. Levon had to leave. Had to put more space between himself and Joe before he did any more damage.

Levon backed out of the driveway, unconsciously relieved Joe hadn't done anything more than yell at him to stop. He'd been afraid his lover might be foolish enough to actually stand in his way. He deliberately refused to look in the review mirror as he burned rubber in his haste to get away.

Levon wiped angrily at his face, brushing away tears he hadn't even been aware were falling. He whispered 'I'm sorry' over and over as he drove. He had no idea if he was still apologizing for losing his temper in the first place, for hitting Joe or not being man enough to stick around and let Joe even the score.

He'd promised himself he was never going to be like his father. Levon had never struck Caroline; no matter how hard she'd pushed him or how heated their arguments had gotten he'd never raised a hand to her.

He shook his head again trying to dislodge image of Joe's shocked and pained expression. Levon had to find somewhere to think. He had to figure out what to do. And he had to get away to do that. He couldn't be anywhere near Joe-not now. Not until he knew for sure he wasn't going to fuck up again.

Joe looked at the clock. He grimaced. It was only a minute since he'd last looked. Damn it.

Levon had taken off almost an hour ago. Joe bit his lower lip not sure if he'd made the right decision to wait. He thought if he gave Levon some time, a chance to cool down, room to think, it would be better than chasing after him. Joe looked at the clock again. He'd give it another five minutes and then he'd go after Levon.

Joe swore vehemently in Italian. He wasn't even sure where to look. He was sorely tempted to call the station and put out an APB on Levon but good sense had kept him from doing so just yet. He didn't want the entire office mixed up in this. Joe wouldn't even know how to explain it and Levon would kill him if everyone they worked with was suddenly involved in their private lives.

Joe paced the length of the living room again. Levon shouldn't be driving. He was probably overheated and dehydrated from his run. And he was definitely too upset to be thinking clearly. God. What a mess.

Joe berated himself for being such an idiot. He should have known better than to push Levon. He should have known it wouldn't go well. It never did. But he'd been too worried and angry to wait any longer. The man was so keyed up after Joe's PT session he'd taken off in the heat of the day to go jogging, failing to take any water with him. Joe had been worried the moment he'd seen Levon head down the driveway at a dead run. Levon being gone longer than he usually was when on a run hadn't done anything to alleviate Joe's worry.

What the hell was Levon thinking? What had upset him so badly that he'd be so stupid? It wasn't like him at all. He was usually the more level headed one of their partnership... at least when it came to personal things, on the job it was a toss up.

"And just what were you thinking, you schmuck?" Joe berated himself as he looked at the clock again. "You know better than to force him. And to crowd him when he's that wound up-you deserved to get belted one."

Joe knew his lover could pack quite a wallop and considered himself lucky Levon managed to pull his punch at the last moment. It was painful, but not nearly as bad as it would have if Levon had put everything in to it. It hurt more to know Levon had lashed out because he was scared more so than angry.

"Fuck it," Joe growled. He reached for the phone. He'd call the station before he headed out to look for Levon. Maybe he could just get them to be on the look out without having to say too much or explain why. He'd have time to make up something reasonable once he found Levon.

He jerked back in surprise when the phone rang before he could pick up the receiver. Recovering, Joe snatched it up, suddenly terrified it would be someone calling to tell him Levon had been in an accident, that he'd waited to long.

"Hello?" Joe grimaced as he noticed the small quiver in his voice.

"Joe. It's Minnie."

Joe closed his eyes, nearly gasping in relief. Not the ER or a traffic cop or someone from work to let him know Levon had been hurt. He sent a quick prayer heavenward to express his gratitude.

He opened his eyes. "Minnie, I can't really talk right now. I need to find Le-"

"He's here." She neatly cut him off.

Joe blinked, unsure he'd heard her correctly. "He's there?"

"Yep."

"He's okay?" Joe asked. Please, please say yes, he thought furiously.

"Kind o' depends on your definition of okay."

Joe frowned. What the hell did that mean? "I don't understand."

"Nothing is broken and he ain't bleedin'." Her voice was calm, almost matter-of-fact.

That was something. Clearly there was more. "But?"

"I haven't seen him this bad since Caroline was killed."

Joe flinched. "I'm-"

"When are you going to get here?"

Go there? He wasn't even supposed to be driving. Not to mention he had no idea what to say when he saw Levon. Assuming Levon even wanted to see him. "I'm not sure that's such a good-"

"I'm sure," she declared, not giving him a chance to really protest. "You get your butt here, Joseph LaFiamma, and you fix whatever the hell you did. You hear me?"

"Yes, Ma'am." There wasn't any other answer he could give.

"Good." There was a small pause. "And pack a bag. Thinkin' y'all are gonna stay here for a few days."

"Why?"

"Because I have no idea how long it'll take ta fix this. And ya ain't leaving until it is settled." He could hear the exasperation in her voice. "Fool boys. Can't trust ya to take care of yerselves for love nor money."

There was something decidedly reassuring in her gruff, caring tone. Joe nodded even though she couldn't see him do it. "I'll be there as soon as I can."

"Good."

"Minnie," he called out before she could hang up.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."

"Yer welcome." He could hear her smile. "Make sure ya drive safe now."

"Yes, Ma'am."

Joe waited until she hung up before he placed the receiver back in the cradle. He sighed. Levon was okay. He wasn't lying in a ditch somewhere. Joe grimaced, hands clenching into fists. He was going to kill him. Twice now he'd scared the hell out of Joe.

He took a slow, deep breath. Joe would kill Levon later, once he made sure everything was going to be all right between them. First, he had to get to Minnie's. Pack a bag, she'd said. He could do that. Levon wouldn't need much, if anything. He usually kept a few things at Minnie's out of habit.

Joe bit his lower lip. He wasn't supposed to drive and the Cobra's stick shift would be a bitch. His shoulder and upper chest were sore from his physical therapy. He eyed the box where Levon kept the 'emergency funds'. It should be enough for a cab.

He called the cab first. It would take twenty minutes to get to the ranch. He'd have his bag packed in that time.

Nothing fancy. Jeans and t-shirts would be sufficient. It wasn't like Minnie expected him to be a fashion plate. And he really wasn't in the mood to get to picky, just stuffing things in a duffle bag that didn't require much thought or attention.

He was ready and waiting when the cab showed up. Joe ignored the man's expression when he told him where he wanted to go. He just handed him a hundred dollars and told him to drive.

Joe stared out the window trying to figure out what he was going to say. He felt like he should apologize; he just wasn't sure for what exactly, which meant he had no idea how to apologize either.

He sighed. He understood less than half of what their argument was about. Joe forced himself to review it from the beginning. Maybe if he just went over it again he could figure it out.

How the hell Levon could be jealous of Sarah? They'd only just met her for crying out loud. It wasn't like his lover to be the insecure one in their relationship. The man was usually too sensible than to be jealous of a practical stranger. Joe grimaced. But then, Aunt Teresa had never been part of the picture before either.

He'd never thought Levon would take so much of what she said to heart. Joe had thought just ignoring her repeated comments about finding a wife or changing the subject would be enough to let everyone know he wasn't interested in discussing that part of his life with them. He thought they'd catch on that he had no intention of just finding some woman and settling down to pacify his family.

That obviously wasn't the message Levon had gotten. Damn. Joe realized his not saying anything could just have easily meant he agreed with them. He thought Levon knew how committed he was to their relationship. He shouldn't have to say anything, damn it.

God it hurt that Levon would think Joe could betray him with someone else. That he would think Joe even wanted anyone else. Joe scowled. He'd have to set dumb son of a bitch straight on that for sure. When he said he was in for the long haul he meant it. He hadn't promised forever lightly.

Joe sighed. It wasn't all Levon's fault. Not really. Hell, Joe had clearly missed a few things lately. How could he have fail to notice Levon waking up in a panic thinking Joe really had died and he'd only dreamed the FBI fucking things up was something he couldn't quite understand. Joe usually heard Levon's nightmares. He'd thought the latest ones were tapering off, that things were getting better. He really thought Levon was sleeping more-not a full eight hours yet, but more than he had been.

He knew Levon had lost weight, and thought it was just the product of his lover's increased activity. But in hindsight, Joe realized Levon's appetite had been off since before his family had arrived.

Shit. What else had Joe failed to notice?

They really needed to talk. Jesus. When had communication become an issue for them? Joe felt like smacking his head against the window.

"Can't this thing go any faster?" Joe growled, more anxious than ever to see Levon.

The cabby looked at him through the rearview mirror. Joe wasn't sure what the man saw in his expression but he coaxed more speed out of the car. Joe decided that was good enough.

Joe rubbed his shoulder, wincing. He had remembered to pack his pain medication but wasn't keen on taking any just yet. He needed to have a clear head when he saw Levon. The pills could wait.

Joe chewed on his lower lip, worrying about what sort of state he'd find his lover in. He wasn't quite sure what Minnie meant when she'd said she hadn't seen him in such a bad way since Caroline was killed, but there was no way it could be a good thing.

Joe nervously played with his pendant. He wanted to tell the driver to go faster again, but decided against it. The guy didn't look all that confident behind the wheel at their current speed. Going any faster and he'd probably wreck the car. How the hell Joe managed to get the only cabbie in the world who didn't drive like a he was planning on competing in a demolition derby and training for the Indy 500 at the same time was just one more mystery to top off the day.

Joe sighed. Levon was safe with Minnie. No matter what was wrong, he would be safe there. Probably why he went to her place to begin with. He'd be okay for another half hour until Joe could get there.

He really hoped Minnie was right in calling him and telling him to show up at her house.
It could be a huge mistake. Not like he even knew what to say to Levon, much less explain what happened to Minnie. He could make it all worse. But there was no doubt in his mind if he didn't show up when he said he would, Minnie would hunt his ass down. It wasn't only Levon's grandfather who'd been a good shot.

Joe took several slow deep breaths. They could fix this. Other couples fought. So this was their first real fight, it wasn't like they'd never disagreed before. Yeah, so that was mostly at work and not at home, but they always found a happy medium at the office. They could figure this out too.

Joe felt an odd blend of relief and unease as the cabbie turned down Minnie's street. He was sorely tempted to tell the guy to turn around. His better judgment stopped him from saying anything.

The cabbie pulled into the drive and stopped the car. He looked back over his shoulder. "You sure this is where you want to be?"

"I'm sure." Joe smiled, realizing he hadn't even needed to think about the answer.

The cabbie nodded. To Joe's surprise he got out of the car and opened the door for him, taking Joe's bag. "Noticed you were favorin' that shoulder."

"Thanks."

Joe handed the man an extra twenty and got a quick grin in response.

"Take care, man." And with that the cabbie was back in his car and leaving.

Joe eyed Minnie's modest home, silently laughing at his own unease. He really shouldn't be worried. From the first time he'd meet her, Minnie had greeted him with open arms. He'd always been welcome in her house.

"Not like she didn't order me to show up," he reminded himself, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly. He picked up his bag and walked to the front door. Joe's hand was posed to knock when the door opened.

Minnie looked at him, gray eyes unnervingly sharp in their assessment. "Well, at least whatever the hell happened, it wasn't all one sided."

Joe blinked. "What?"

"You look like nine miles o' bad road, boy." She shook her head. "C'mon in. Let's get ya inside and let me have a good look at you."

Joe was tempted to tell her she'd already had a good look at him, but wisely kept his mouth shut. He didn't protest when she took his bag, knowing what she'd likely have to say if he did. Joe figured he'd aggravated enough Lundys for one day.

He followed Minnie into the house, sighing in relief as the cool air washed over him. Joe didn't think he'd ever really get used Texas heat and humidity. Chicago didn't have anything that compared to it.

He immediately looked for Levon, frowning when he didn't spot his lover. Joe turned to look at Minnie. "Where-"

"He's in his room. Sleeping." Joe would have found that comforting if not for the expression on Minnie's face. She was clearly worried.

Joe instinctively headed for Levon's room. Minnie's hand on his arm stopped him before he'd gone more than a step.

"He's okay for now, Joe. Better to just let him rest." She squeezed once before letting go. "Let's go into the kitchen."

Joe bit his tongue to stop himself from arguing with her. He reminded himself that pushing too hard, too soon was what had gotten him into this mess in the first place.

She pointed to a chair and Joe sat. Minnie set a pitcher of iced, sweet tea on the table and poured them each a glass. Joe didn't really like sweet tea, but since living in Houston he'd learned to tolerate it. And since he hadn't eaten lunch Joe figured he could use the sugar. A little fortification wouldn't hurt. It was probably why Minnie offered it to him, especially given her comment on how he looked.

Taking the bull by the horns, Joe asked, "Levon tell you what happened?"

She sipped her tea, gray eyes studying him in a way that made it hard for Joe to sit still. He forced himself to wait for her to answer, doing his best not to fidget. He always thought Minnie would do a damn fine job interrogating suspects. Joe wondered sometimes if sitting across from her at this same table was where his partner first learned how to make a suspect squirm.

"He didn't say much when he showed up." Minnie took another sip of her tea. "All I really understood was that he thinks he messed up." She gave Joe a pointed look. "You wanna maybe tell me why that is?"

Joe sighed. He sipped his tea, knowing he was only delaying the inevitable. Joe figured the best place to start was the beginning. Or at least what he thought was the beginning.

"You know about me getting shot, right?'

Minnie nodded slowly. "Levon mentioned bein' told you were dead."

Joe winced. "Yeah, the FBI-"

"I know that part of the story, Joe," Minnie interrupted, her voice soft, encouraging. "Don't need to rehash what a cluster they made of that whole situation."

"Okay." Joe took a deep breath. "I didn't realize how much it upset him...thinking I was dead. I really just didn't get it. I mean I know it was a shock and all, but..." He shook his head. "I thought he was getting over it."

Minnie gave him a look he recognized as the same one Levon gave him whenever Joe said something particularly stupid. "And how exactly does one get over somethin' like that?"

"It's not like we didn't talk about it. We did." Joe defended himself. "And it's not like I was ever really dead, damn it--" He stopped abruptly, realizing cussing in front of Minnie wasn't going to help his case.

Joe ran a hand through his hair. He didn't want her to think he hadn't been trying to understand or help Levon. "I knew he was having nightmares...I thought they were getting better. I tried to make sure he was getting enough sleep, was eating okay, drinking more than just coffee, but with my family in town everything was a little insane for a few days."

Joe grimaced. "My aunt Teresa kept going on about me settling down and finding a good woman."

"She don't know about you and Levon?"

"Most of my family doesn't know."

"Why?" The question was a simple request for information not a condemnation.

Joe's lips curled in a wry smile as he forced himself to make eye contact. "Because not all my family is as accepting as you are of a man being with another man."

Minnie sighed. "I'm guessin' you didn't say much to set her straight about where yer feelings lie then."

"No." There was now way for him to hide the guilt and regret in his voice.

"And yer jus' starting ta understand how that might have seemed ta Levon, yeah?"

Joe flinched. No point in denying it. "Yes."

"Let's see if I got this." Minnie pursed her lips and nodded. "Levon didn't have anyone ta talk to about how yer death-"

"I didn't die!"

She fixed him with a pointed look, silently chastising him for interrupting. Minnie leaned forward, resting her elbows on the table. "He didn't have anyone to talk to about how it affected him but you. No time to really adjust and have any sort of lengthy discussion when yer family shows up. Which wouldn't have really been a bad thing---kin should be with you when you have need---but them not knowing about you and Levon just added fuel ta a slow burning fire because you didn't deny your relationship, but you don't affirm it either."

Joe's jaw tightened. "This isn't all my fault."

"Didn't say it was." She countered quietly. "Levon should know how ta speak his mind, and most of the time he does." She sighed heavily. "He just never quite mastered how to talk about the stuff that scares him. And thinking you died, believing it for three days, Joe, isn't anything in the world scared him worse than that."

She cocked her head to one side. "I know you lost people Joseph LaFiamma. Family, friends, a partner."

Joe winced. "He told you about Szabo."

It wasn't really a question but Minnie answered him anyway. "Of course he told me about your old partner getting killed. Used to drive him nuts the way you always insisted on being the first one in. Like you was bulletproof or something."

She clucked her tongue. "Fool boy. Was just you being afraid of having to bury another partner. Just didn't want to be the one left behind."

She pointed a finger at him. "Shouldn't be that hard for you to understand how Levon felt for those three days."

Joe looked way, biting his lip. He hadn't wanted to consciously make that connection. "I thought since I never really died...if we just didn't dwell-"

"I know." She smiled softly, reaching out to take his hand. "And he does too. Was probably the reason he didn't blow up before now. But it took you a good two years ta get over what happened to Szabo. You can't be expecting him ta just bounce back like it was nothing. Not when he already knows what it was like to bury a loved one."

"Caroline," Joe whispered. By the time she'd been killed she and Levon were more strangers than husband and wife, but Levon still had feelings for her, still held out hope for some sort of reconciliation.

"Caroline," Minnie agreed. "And he loves you more than he ever did her."

Joe looked down, unable to make eye contact any more. He felt like an idiot.

"Tell me the rest."

Joe looked up, startled. "The rest?"

"He said he'd hit you." She cocked her head to one side. "Don't see a mark on you, so I'm guessin' Little Levon made it a body shot."

"It wasn't his fault." Joe leaned forward. He needed her to understand. "He was upset. I pushed him. I know better. He doesn't like to be crowded---I got too close-scared him. It wasn't his fault. He just reacted to me being in his space, to the tone of my voice. It wasn't on purpose."

Minnie sighed softly. "His father was a rat bastard."

Joe was stunned to her curse. "You knew?"

"Not until he was a teenager." She frowned. "He never came here with bruises you could see." Her knuckles whitened as she gripped her glass tighter. "I should have known sooner. Should have figured it out."

Yes, you should have, Joe shouted silently, jaw clenched tightly to keep the words inside. Someone should have noticed Levon's father was regularly beating the shit out of him. His lover could have been spared a lot of pain if someone, anyone, had bothered to see the obvious.

She gave him a sharp look. "You live with the man, and you didn't know he's still having nightmares, boy, don't be casting any stones."

Joe's eyes narrowed. "A few days isn't the same as years."

"No, it ain't." Minnie sat back, paling. She looked away, biting her lower lip.

"He learned young ta hide, and he learned well." Minnie sighed softly, shaking her head. "Hard thing to admit---my own short comings."

Joe looked away again, feeling guilty for causing her pain. She loved Levon. Had given him a sanctuary---one he still relied on or he wouldn't have come here.

He reached out and squeezed her hand. "He doesn't blame you."

"He should." She gave him a tired smile.

Joe didn't know what to say to that. Agreeing would only cause her more pain, but he couldn't argue with her either. Better to just keep his mouth shut and accept it at face value.

Minnie cleared her throat and squared her shoulders. "You know what ta say to him?"

Joe's lips curled upward in a wry smile. "Not really, no."

"You aren't angry with him, right?"

"No." Not just no, Joe thought, hell no. He was much to blame as Levon, maybe more.

"Start there then," Minnie suggested. "Think he may need ta know that more than anything else. Well, that, and to know you still love him."

Joe grinned. "Going to take more than one hit to make me stop doing that."

"Knew you were gonna be a good one for him from the minute I met you." She smiled warmly at him.

Joe managed to keep his surprise from showing up on his face. He'd known she liked him, but hadn't realized it went back so far as when they'd first met.

She pointed toward the door with a small jerk of her chin. "About time ya went and talked ta him." Minnie got up from the table. "And high time I got started on dinner."

Joe fiddled with his pendant for a moment before taking a deep breath. He wasn't going to fix things by sitting here, no matter how safe the kitchen seemed. Wasn't like Minnie would me hide out in here anyway, he thought with a chagrined frown, ashamed to find himself still uneasy about facing Levon.

I can do this, Joe told himself. He needed to do this as much as Levon needed him to. Joe got up from the table and headed for Levon's room.

Levon jerked himself awake before the nightmare could really even begin. He was getting good at recognizing it before being engulfed him completely. Although escaping even at the opening gambit didn't lessen the overall impact much; it did keep him from screaming which Levon considered a definite plus. He rubbed at his eyes, struggling to get his breathing back under control.

Levon instinctively searched for the warm body that should be next to him, a flash of panic nearly overwhelming him when he didn't find Joe. He sat up abruptly, one hand reaching across the bed before it registered he wasn't in his bed...at least not the one at the ranch. Levon blinked, looking around, belatedly recognizing his bedroom at Mother Minnie's.

"Levon? You okay?"

Levon stared at Joe, not quite comprehending how he could be standing so close when he'd last seen him in the driveway at the ranch. Levon shook his head, closing his eyes. Maybe he was still dreaming. Wouldn't be the first time one of his nightmares had taken a strange turn surprising the hell out of him.

Levon jerked back he felt fingers touch his cheek. He scrambled away, back against the headboard, eyes wide and wary.

"Easy, Cowboy."

Levon took a deep breath, still uncertain of what was real and what wasn't. "Joe?"

"Yeah, Levon, it's me." Joe's voice was soft, gentle. He didn't look upset or angry, but Levon wasn't ready to trust his perceptions just yet.

"What...when...I don't..." Levon struggled to organize his thoughts and ask a question that actually made sense. "Why are you here?"

"Because you're here."

When Joe looked like he might move closer, Levon slid off the bed, keeping it between them. "You shouldn't be here."

"Why?"

"Because...Because I hit you."

Joe rolled his eyes. "I've been hit harder."

"That's not the point." Levon almost snarled.

Joe sat on the bed. "Did you want to hit me? To hurt me?"

"No!" Levon swallowed hard, instinctively reaching out before stopping himself. "I didn't...I swear, Joe, I would never-"

"I know, Levon, I know you didn't mean to." Joe inched closer. "I am not hurt. And I'm not mad at you."

Levon chewed on his lower lip, uncertain. "You sure?"

"Of course, I'm sure." Joe rolled his eyes. "What sort of stupid question is that? You think I wouldn't know if I was mad or not?"

"Sometimes you can be a little-"

"Jesus, Levon." Joe glared at him. "I can tell when I'm pissed, and I'm not pissed at you."

Levon couldn't help the small, wry smile that formed. "Ya are now."

Joe snorted. "That's normal for us."

Levon ran a hand through is hair. "What happened at home wasn't."

"No, not it wasn't," Joe agreed softly.

When Joe moved closer, sliding further onto the bed, Levon forced himself not to move back. He couldn't stop himself from folding his arms, unconsciously trying to confine his hands by tucking them underneath. He couldn't hurt Joe again if he couldn't hit him.

"Why didn't you tell me you were still having nightmares?"

"I didn't want you to worry." Levon swallowed hard, looking away. "You had enough on your plate ta deal with."

"You think I'm some sort of weakling, that it?"

"No." Levon looked up, startled. Joe was one of the strongest people he knew. "Ain't like that, Joe."

He shook his head, the feeling of déjà vu nearly overwhelming. He hadn't explained himself well the last time they'd had this conversation. Levon sighed. "Jus'...shit...ya said it yourself, it wasn't like you really died. Shouldn't bother me like this. Shouldn't be any big deal. Not something you needed ta be bothered with."

"Cowboy, wasn't it you that told me no one should have to apologize for how they feel?" Joe held out a hand to him. "I never meant for you to think believing I was dead shouldn't upset you. I just didn't want you to dwell on it-didn't want you to relive all that over and over."

"Didn't really want to either," Levon admitted wearily. He was heartily tired of seeing his lover die over and over. "Weren't like I had much choice in the matter."

"Yeah, I should have figured that."

"Not yer fault." Levon risked reaching out to take the hand Joe was still offering. He wasn't sure he should take it, but he couldn't ignore it either. And he needed that connection, needed it so badly.

Joe carefully entwined their fingers. "Didn't help much either."

Levon sighed, shaking his head. It wasn't Joe's fault. "Not sure what ya could have done, Joe."

"Could have told my family they needed to wait a few days before coming to visit."

"They love ya too, Joe." Levon shook his head again. "Wouldn't have been fair ta make them wait."

"Could have told Aunt Teresa to shut up and mind her own business."

Levon stared at him surprised. He hadn't meant to for Joe to be angry with his aunt. Yeah, she could have been less pushy and a lot less vocal, but it wasn't worth Joe being upset with her. Family was important to him-too important for Levon to let Joe blame Teresa for his mess.

"Joe, it wasn't a big deal-"

"Bullshit." Joe cut him off, giving him a hard look. "Can you honestly tell me if she hadn't been going on and on about me finding a wife you would have given Sarah a second thought?"

Levon felt his face warm. God he'd been such an idiot about the therapist. She was just doing her job. And to accuse Joe of practically cheating on him---Levon hung his head. Joe had every right to be pissed at him for that.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, tugging at his hand trying to pull away. He was so stupid.

Joe held on, his grip gentle and sure without being confining. "This is why we need to talk more."

Was opening my mouth that got me into this in the first place, Levon thought with a mental grimace. He thought he was doing okay until then.

"You were not doing okay on your own, Cowboy."

"What?" Levon frowned. Had he said what he was thinking out loud? Shit. He must have.

"You were not doing okay on your own," Joe repeated. "You aren't sleeping well. You've lost weight." He cocked his head to one side. "You're lashing out."

Levon flinched, and tried again to pull his hand free. Joe's grip tightened. Levon swallowed hard, resisting the urge to fight. He wouldn't be able to get away without using more force, possibly hurting Joe. Levon couldn't do it, wouldn't do that. Not again. He resigned himself to giving in when Joe pulled him closer, getting him to sit on the bed.

"At least being pissed about Sarah got you talking to me." Joe gave him a tentative smile. "Even if I didn't quite understand everything at the time."

"Not sure I did either," Levon admitted, shrugging one shoulder. There had been so much going on in his head at the time it just came boiling out without any real forethought. No rhyme or reason to it. Just anger and fear and frustration.

"Do you now?"

Levon bit his lower lip. "Dunno." He rubbed tiredly at his eyes wishing he'd gotten more sleep. It was hard to think when he felt like he wasn't firing on all cylinders. There was still so much going on in his head; it was hard to sort his thoughts and emotions into any sort of logical order.

"Tell me about your nightmares," Joe directed, voice soft, encouraging.

Levon shook his head, not so much in denial as to clear his thoughts. "Not sure-"

"It's helped before." Joe squeezed his hand.

Talking his nightmares had helped in the past. Levon just wasn't sure he could talk about seeing Joe die. He hung his head, eyes closing. He flinched when he felt Joe's hand cup his cheek, but he didn't jerk away.

"It'll be okay, Levon," Joe offered, pulling Levon closer to him.

Levon wanted to resist, wanted to make sure Joe kept a safe distance between them. But he also wanted and needed the comfort Joe was offering. He sighed softly, letting Joe pull him into a loose one arm hug. He leaned into his lover, grateful for his solid warmth.

"It's okay, Cowboy." Joe started playing with Levon's hair, fingers carding through loose curls. "I promise, it will be okay."

The tone of Joe's voice, his hand in Levon's hair had been soothing for so long it was nearly impossible to stay tense. Levon knew that was probably why Joe did it, but he enjoyed it too much to object.

"Are they always the same?" Joe asked, fingers still playing with Levon's curls.

"Mostly." There was some variation, but never enough that Levon didn't know what was coming.

"How does it start?"

"You leaving the courthouse." Levon swallowed hard. The video feed he'd watched gave him more than enough detail to recreate the scene in living color. He shivered, remembering seeing Joe get hit, seeing him fall.

"I'm here, Levon. I'm here." Joe wrapped both arms around him. "I leave the courthouse, and then what?"

"Shots fired." Levon shuddered. "You fall."

He bit his lower lip. "Paramedics never show and...and I can't stop the bleeding." Levon struggled to hold back a sob. It was just a damn dream. He knew how things really were.

"Fuckers from the FBI are there." Levon shivered, seeing it all in his mind's eye. The marble courthouse steps growing more red with each second while two men in gray suits and sunglasses watch, stone-faced and unmoving.

"They just stand there. Tell me I was too late. That I was too slow."

He took a shaky breath. It wasn't always at the courthouse. Occasionally the dreams were somewhere even worse.

"Sometimes I'm in the hospital. You're on the operating table. Doctor is saying you'll be okay just before the monitor shows a flat line." Levon shook his head. "Hate that noise."

"Me too," Joe offered softly, reminding Levon he was there.

"Everything shifts then and I hear the Feds saying you are okay. That I got nothing to worry about. They lied when they told me you were dead."

Levon swallowed, his throat feeling raw, like he'd been screaming. "I walk into our bedroom. You're on the bed...b-b-ut you a-a-ren't sleeping."

He bit his lip, trying to hold in a sob. Levon wrapped his arms tighter around himself. "You d-d-don't answer me when I call your name. Y-y-ou aren't breathing. And then there is all this blood."

Like his dream about the courthouse, the color of blood is the dominant image---it flows out over everything. Levon even heard it as it dripped off the bed, as monotonic as the flat line of a heart monitor.

"Jesus." Joe hugged him tighter, rocking slowly.

"And then I wake up," Levon finished. He hung his head, wiping at his eyes, expecting to feel tears. He didn't know what it meant that he wasn't crying.

"Levon? Cowboy...look at me, please."

Levon hesitated before looking up and making eye contact. Joe took his hand and placed it against his throat directly over his pulse point. Levon could feel Joe's heartbeat, strong and sure. This was something they'd done before, finding it reassuring for both of them to have tangible proof of life. Levon took a slow, deep breath, taking comfort in that steady beat and warm skin beneath his fingertips.

"I'm okay."

"Yeah, you are." Levon agreed, undisguised wonder and relief in his voice. It wasn't like he hadn't known--it was just now he was beginning to truly accept it.

"I'm not going anywhere." Joe cupped Levon's face, thumb caressing his cheek. "I don't want a wife and kids or a house with a picket fence."

"You sure?" Levon smiled, suddenly feeling confident enough to tease his lover. "I mean, I can see ya mowing the grass every Saturday, changing diapers, only having sex once a week in the missionary position-"

"Shaddup." Joe smiled at him, leaning in to rest his forehead against Levon's. Sober blue eyes held brown. "I love you. You are all I want. All I need. Got that?"

"Got it." Levon swallowed hard. He felt like a moron for ever doubting Joe. Was proof of just how far gone he'd been. He really hadn't been doing well on his own.

"Good." Joe kissed him, chaste and soft. "I should have said something sooner and for that, I'm sorry."

"Ya didn't do anything wrong," Levon argued. How could Joe have known how much to heart he'd taken so much of what Teresa said when Levon hadn't even known? Or that he would get jealous of a total stranger? Wasn't like he ever had done that before.

"Not doing anything wrong, isn't the same as doing everything right, Cowboy."

"Still don't make it your fault." Levon sighed. "I shoulda said something." He should have told Joe about his nightmares, about how he was feeling, about everything.

"Yes, you should have." Joe's firm agreement left no room or argument. He gave Levon another gentle kiss. "And I should have been paying more attention."

"Had yer own problems ta deal-"

"That's an excuse, Levon, not a reason." Joe shook his head. "You were helping me. No reason I couldn't help you back. We're supposed to be a team."

Levon winced. When Joe put it like that---"I'm sorry."

"Yeah, me too." Joe smiled gently. "How about we agree that we both could have handled things better and plan to do better going forward?"

"Sounds good."

"From now on, we talk to one another---honestly." Joe's eyes hardened, the color shifting from warm blue to a cool gray. "No more half truths, Cowboy. No more keeping me at arms length."

"I'll try." Levon couldn't really promise anything more. He knew himself well enough to know that. And lying was out of the question.

"Fair enough." Joe smiled. "If we are both trying, how can we fail?"

Levon chuckled. "Always did like yer positive attitude."

Joe grinned, leaning in closer. "That all you like about me?"

"Not even close." Levon fought his first instinct to pull back, once more uncomfortable with being within striking distance. He took a deep breath, eyes closing as the scent of Joe's familiar cologne came to him. It was a fragrance that he'd associated with comfort. Comfort he wasn't sure he deserved any more.

"You okay?"

Levon nodded jerkily. "Jus'...don't want to ever hurt you, Joe."

"Levon, look at me."

He opened his eyes, forcing himself to make eye contact.

Joe searched his face. "I trust you, Cowboy."

"Not sure you should."

"I'm sure enough for both of us."

"What if-"

"No ifs, ands or buts." Joe rolled his eyes. "None of that would have happened if we'd both just been honest with each other and talked."

Levon chuckled weakly. "Well, there is that."

"We'll go slow," Joe smiled, reassuring and gentle. "Take our time."

"Appreciate that." Levon nodded, feeling a surge of affection for Joe. I really do love this man, he thought.

There was a soft knock at the door, startling both of them. "Dinner is ready," Mother Minnie called from the other side. "You boys finish up in there and come eat."

"Be right there Minnie," Joe called back over his shoulder. He looked back at Levon. "We okay?"

Levon nodded. "We're okay."

"Let's not keep her waiting then."

Levon snickered, lips curling in a wry smile. "Like we'd get a choice." She hadn't asked them to come eat, she told them to.

Joe got up. He offered Levon his hand. Levon hesitated for a moment before taking it, letting Joe pull him to his feet. When Joe released his hand, Levon stepped closer, cupping Joe's face.

"Love you, Joe. Heart and-"

"Soul." Joe smiled, eyes once more a deep blue. "I know. Love you too, Levon."

Not stopping to think, Levon leaned in and kissed Joe, trying to convey everything he felt for his lover and friend in that one action. Their tongues met, saying hello like old friends.

Levon jerked back when there was another sharp knock at the door. "Now, boys."

"Definitely don't have a choice." Joe laughed. "C'mon, Cowboy, let's go see what she's got for us."

Dinner was the sort of home cooked meal Joe had come to enjoy since moving to Texas. Chicken fried steak with brown gravy, mashed potatoes, green beans. It was rich and heavy and oh so satisfying.

Joe sighed, rubbing absently at his full stomach. He'd have to bust his ass at physical therapy to work off this meal, but it was worth it.

He smiled thinking Levon had enjoyed the meal every bit as much as Joe had. Probably more. When Joe's family was in, his aunts had insisted on cooking. And while they were fine cooks, much of it wasn't fare Levon was used to. Joe belatedly realized that probably contributed to Levon's lack of appetite as much as his struggle to deal with all the emotional turmoil.

"You get enough, Joe?" Minnie asked.

"Yes, Ma'am, I did." Joe was sure he couldn't eat another bite.

"Little Levon?"

"I'm good, thanks Mother Minnie." Levon smiled at his grandmother, his plate nearly as clean as it was when he sat down to eat.

She nods, clearly pleased. "You boys clear the table and I'll get the apple pie."

Joe shook his head. Pie? Apple no less. His favorite. No way he could avoid having a piece---not that he really wanted to, but he shouldn't eat more.

Levon smirked at him, as he got up to start clearing the table. "Hard ta say no to a piece, ain't it?"

Joe shook his head. "More like impossible."

"You want ice cream, Levon?" Minnie asked, already reaching for the freezer.

"Yes, Ma'am." Levon grinned. As far as Joe knew, Levon always had pie ala mode. The man seemed incapable of having his pie plain.

"Joe?"

Joe hesitated. He would love to add ice cream too knowing just how good it would taste, but just having a piece of pie was bad enough. No reason to make it any worse. "No, thank you, plain is fine."

Levon gave him an amused look. "Worried about your figure?"

He gave Levon a dirty look, disguising how pleased he was that Levon was clearly comfortable enough to tease him. They'd made progress toward getting back on an even keel, but Joe wasn't foolish enough to think they were all the way there yet. They still had a lot to work through.

Levon had sat next to him throughout the meal but Joe hadn't missed how carefully his lover held himself. He was hesitant to reach for things, careful not to invade Joe's space. It was almost the same reaction Levon had when he'd accidentally given Joe a black eye. So while not totally unexpected, Joe was still disappointed to see it.

Minnie set two plates with pie on the now cleared table. Joe hadn't really expected her to eat dessert with them. She seemed to take more pleasure in seeing them eat it than eating any herself. And was always bent on getting the dishes done immediately. It wasn't like they'd get any dirtier sitting in the sink, but Joe learned to just go with the flow in her house and not question it.

He gave Minnie a smile when he noticed his piece was cut a little smaller than Levon's. He should have expected that. Minnie knew he tried not to over indulge his sweet tooth. Unlike Levon, who seemed incapable of going more than a day without some form of processed sugar.

She smiled back. "You boys enjoy your pie."

"We will."

Joe took a bite of his pie, eyes closing to better savor the taste. He wasn't exactly sure what Minnie did, but he'd never had a pie quite as good as hers.

He heard Levon's soft hum of contentment. Joe opened his eyes, watching Levon eat with obvious satisfaction. Joe was surprised to realize that it had been more than a week that he'd seen Levon eat with such a good appetite.

He shook his head, disappointed in himself. He wasn't some rookie for crying out loud, but a seasoned cop who took pride in his usually observant nature. Who knew getting shot in the shoulder could make me blind too, Joe thought with disgust. He wondered if deaf and stupid should be added to the list.

"You okay, Joe?" Levon asked, eye shifting from Joe to his barely touched dessert.

"Just a little tired," Joe said with a wry smile. Levon didn't really need to know he was still feeling a stupid and guilty. And it was true; he was tired. Between his first physical therapy session, the emotional roller coaster that had followed, and his now full belly, Joe was running out of steam.

Levon nodded. "Day was a little rougher than either of us expected."

Joe reached out to squeeze Levon's shoulder, pleased his lover allowed the contact without flinching. "Nothing we can't handle together, Cowboy."

Levon nodded again, sighing softly. His expression was a blend of self-recrimination and sadness. He made eye contact. "Forgot that for a bit."

"You weren't the only one, Levon." Nothing that happened was either's fault alone. More than enough blame to go around, Joe thought ruefully. "Just have to make sure we don't forget again, right?"

"Right." Levon smiled. He pointed to Joe's plate. "Better finish that or Mother Minnie will think there's something wrong with it."

Joe rolled his eyes. As if there could ever be anything wrong with her pie. He finished his piece only a little after Levon pushed his own empty plate away.

Levon hid a yawn behind one hand. Joe wondered if Minnie would mind if they went to bed early. He shook his head, appalled that he was even considering lying down before it was really dark out.

"Sucks getting old, don't it?" Levon grinned at him, eyes twinkling.

Joe would ordinarily smack his lover's arm playfully for such a comment, but he hesitated. He wasn't sure how such an action would be received. He settled for flipping Levon off, getting a broader grin for his trouble.

"Joseph!" Mother Minnie's brusque tone got his attention more than the volume. "That is not a polite thing to do."

Joe swallowed, ducking his head, feeling like a child getting caught with his hand in the cookie jar. He bit his lip to keep from pointing at Levon and saying 'he started it'. Looking up, Joe apologized. "Sorry, Minnie. Won't happen again."

"See that it doesn't." She nodded sharply. "And don't you start looking smug, Little Levon. I know you were pushing his buttons."

"Yes, Ma'am." Levon looked at Joe and it was all he could do to keep from giggling.

"Go on, you two." She rolled her eyes as she took their empty plates, clearly aware that her authority wasn't absolute and comfortable with that. "Maybe you can find something on TV, eh?"

"Sure, Mother Minnie."

Joe had been here often enough to know what she meant was to turn the TV on and find Jeopardy for her to watch. As far as game shows went, Joe didn't mind that one. At least it didn't have any stupid contestants jumping up and down, excited about winning a toaster oven or some other nonsense.

Joe was pleased that Levon sat with him on the couch, although not as close as he would at home before everything that happened. He missed having Levon lean against him, missed playing with the silken blond curls. But he took solace in the fact that Levon had offered him his hand to hold, their fingers intertwined.

Their competitive natures played out as the watched the show. Joe knew his partner was a lot smarter than his 'good old boy' nature and slow drawl let on. But it never failed to surprise him the odd bits of trivia Levon knew.

Joe figured it was a natural by product of Levon's better than average memory. The man had impressive recall when it came to anything he heard. His retention with written material wasn't quite as good though. It was one of the reasons Joe could hold his own when playing along with Jeopardy. He was more widely read than Levon, and could recall a lot of what he read with relative ease.

Mother Minnie shot them a look of fond amusement as they kept their own scores and ranked themselves against the contestants on the show. Joe suspected she liked watching them better than the show. Joe didn't mind though, because this was normal. They'd done this same thing at least a dozen times and he welcomed the familiarity, especially as Levon relaxed more and more, leaning against Joe.

Joe was careful not to move too much. He didn't want to call attention to Levon's relaxed posture. He was half afraid that once his lover was aware, he might tense up or jerk away.

He realized this was what they should have done before his family came to visit. This simple enjoyment, this sort of familiar comfort was what they needed to get back to an even keel. Joe might not have understood before, but he got it now.

Levon sighed at the show wrapped up, eyes drifting closed. He tilted his head back, resting against the couch.

"Sucks getting old, don't it?" Joe whispered, smiling.

Levon turned his head, brown eyes opening just enough to give Joe a dirty look. "Shaddup."

Joe laughed softly and kissed the tip of Levon's nose. "You want to watch Wheel of Fortune?" he asked softly.

Levon cast a wary eye toward his grandmother before shaking his head minutely. Neither of them really cared for that particular game show. Joe personally found it inane, and Levon thought it was boring. But Mother Minnie liked it, and since it was her home, they weren't going to tell her to change the channel.

"Those books still in your room?"

Levon rolled his eyes. "Where would they go?"

Joe was torn between being annoyed and amused. He opted to ignore Levon's sarcastic remark. "Minnie, you mind if Levon and I head to his room? Was thinking of reading for a bit."

"Honey, I don't mind." Minnie smiled.

Levon pushed himself off the couch. Joe frowned when he swayed before recovering his balance. He hoped it was just another sign of how tired Levon was rather than something more serious.

Levon stepped over to his grandmother, bending down to place a kiss on her cheek. "G'night, Mother Minnie."

"Good night, Little Levon."

Joe gave her a kiss as well. "Good night, Minnie."

"Night, Joe." She patted his cheek. "Don't stay up too late now. You boys could do with a good night's sleep."

"Yes, Ma'am." Joe resisted the urge to laugh at the idea of staying up too late. Her definition of too late and his had little in common.

Joe followed Levon down the hall to his room. Levon hesitated in the doorway, biting his lip as he turned to look at Joe. Brown eyes were pensive as they met blue.

"Not sure it's a good idea for us---"

"Cowboy, we haven't voluntarily spent a night apart since we got together." Joe reached out carefully to cup Levon's face, not wanting to startle or scare his lover, knowing the contact would help reassure his skittish partner. "Not sure now is the time to start."

Levon took a shaky breath. "But, what if-"

"No buts, Levon." Joe caressed Levon's cheekbone with his thumb.

"Joe, I could hurt you."

Joe shook his head. "You won't."

"Joe...I'm not sure about that."

"I am." Joe smiled. "Sure enough for both of us."

Levon still looked doubtful. Joe knew he'd have to find another argument to convince Levon. He knew exactly what would work, and had no qualms about using it.

"You know I can't sleep if you aren't with me."

Levon's lips curled upward. "You think I don't know when you're bein' manipulative?"

"I think you know when I'm being honest too," Joe countered. He hadn't lied. Neither of them slept well when alone, and they both knew it.

Joe made another point for his lover to consider. "If I spend the night on the couch, Minnie's going to worry."

Levon gave a resigned sigh, and shook his head. "Yer gonna keep coming up with stuff, aren't you?"

"For as long as I have to."

Levon chuckled softly. "So if I give up now, will ya promise not to gloat?"

"I promise."

Levon pointed a finger at Joe. "Holdin' ya to that."

Joe nodded. He was secretly too relieved to gloat. While he'd been confident he'd win---he hadn't been completely sure Levon would let him win so easily.

They took turns making use of the three quarter bath attached to Levon's room, following their normal evening rituals. Like watching Jeopardy with Mother Minnie, it was a familiar activity. Joe still couldn't believe he was getting ready for bed so early, but after the events of the day, staying up to his usual bedtime wasn't an option.

Joe pulled a book off the small shelf in the corner before he got into bed with Levon. He didn't try to snuggle in as close as they normally slept, not wanting to crowd his lover. Joe started reading quietly aloud, sharing the book with Levon.

He was reading for less than ten minutes when Levon moved closer, resting his head on Joe's good shoulder. Joe didn't acknowledge the change, afraid to draw attention to what might have been an unconscious action. He did feel more relaxed with Levon's solid, lean form resting against him, shared warmth making him the bed more comfortable.

Joe wasn't sure exactly when Levon fell asleep. He smiled hearing the soft, steady breathing. Levon's arm moved, his hand resting over Joe's heart.

Joe yawned. He marked his page before closing the book and setting it on the nightstand. He reached for the light, belatedly realizing he couldn't span the distance without moving. Moving would probably wake Levon. Joe mentally shrugged. Levon was obviously not having any problem sleeping with the light on, and Joe was pretty sure it wouldn't bother him much either.

Joe closed his eyes, carefully shifting his weight so he could lay prone without disturbing Levon. The blond muttered something indistinct, his hand rubbing Joe's chest in an instinctive soothing gesture. Joe tilted his head to place a kiss in Levon's hair.

Joe sighed softly. They still had a lot of work to do to get things back to normal, but he was confident they'd laid a solid foundation to getting there. A good night's sleep should help even more. Things would look better in the morning.

The nice thing about Mother Minnie's place being older was that there were always little tasks that needed doing. Usual household maintenance repairs that Minnie didn't always know how to do herself or have the money to pay someone else to do. They were things she kept for Levon to do whenever he came to visit.

Levon smiled to himself as he fixed the sagging screen door. All it took was a tightening of the screws in the hinges. Not a big job, and definitely not something he minded doing for his grandmother; any more than he minded fixing the leaky faucet, caulking several windows or installing a new switch for the living room ceiling fan.

Levon put the tools neatly back in the toolbox that had belonged to his grandfather. He patted the metal lid fondly. His grandfather had been dead for more than twenty years, but Levon still missed the man.

Some times he wondered how different his life would have been if his grandfather hadn't died when Levon was so young. The former Texas Ranger would have been able to keep Levon Sr. from beating the crap out of his son, would have given him a permanent refuge.

Levon shook his head. No point in dwelling on what might have been. It was a useless exercise, and he wasn't prone to self-pity. He wasn't going to start now.

"You need help with that?"

The question caught him unaware; he hadn't heard Joe walk up. Levon was proud of himself for not flinching at the sound of Joe's voice.

"Nope." Levon looked up from where he was crouched near the toolbox, smiling at his lover, hoping Joe hadn't noticed that for a moment he'd frozen. "Wasn't that hard ta fix."

"You got more jobs to do?"

Levon shrugged, rising to his feet. "Mother Minnie is probably addin' ta the list as we speak."

Joe laughed softly. "Did you ever cross everything off the list?"

"Not that I recall." Levon shook his head, smiling easily. "Kind of an ever growin' thing."

Joe nodded in understanding. "You got time to help me with my physical therapy?"

"Sure." Levon had expected Joe to ask him at some point. He had thought about offering, but hadn't known if he should or not. Levon was still feeling his way through things.

Last night had been the first good night's sleep he'd had since Joe had gotten shot. No nightmares---just a solid eight hours that left him feeling more confident and settled than he'd been in a long time. But he was still wary of getting too close, of hurting Joe even accidentally, of saying the wrong thing or doing something stupid.

"Sarah...she give you a list?" Levon cleared his throat. "Stuff she wanted you ta work on?"

"Yeah, I got a list."

"You gonna cuss when we do this?" Levon asked. The exercises were bound to hurt. Joe hadn't ever been shy about verbalizing his reaction to discomfort in the past.

Joe blinked, clearly not expecting that question. "What?"

"You know how Mother Minnie feels about swearin'." Levon casually shrugged one shoulder. "Might want ta pick a place where she can't hear if yer gonna let loose."

Joe frowned, before nodding. "You think your room would be private enough?"

Levon considered the suggestion. Mother Minnie was in the kitchen and probably would be there for another hour or so. With the door closed to his room the sound shouldn't travel too far. And if she did hear, the closed door would be ample proof they'd done their best not to offend her.

"My room it is." Levon picked up the toolbox. "Just let me put this away and I'll be right there."

Levon considered dragging his feet, delaying the inevitable, but dismissed the idea. If he took too long, Joe would come looking for him. And he didn't want Joe to think he wasn't willing to help out. He wanted Joe to get back up to full speed as soon as possible. He just wasn't looking forward to being in a position where he'd naturally cause Joe pain---however necessary it might be.

Levon sighed. Hopefully Sarah wouldn't have included anything too difficult in her list. A day ago he was ready to rip her face off for just doing her job, and today he wished she was here so he wouldn't have to. He rolled his eyes, not amused by the irony.

Levon made his way quietly to his room. He tapped lightly on the door before entering, not wanting to startle Joe by just walking in unannounced. Levon slipped inside, shutting the door behind him.

"You ready?"

Joe nodded. He was wearing an old t-shirt Levon recognized as one he occasionally worked out it. The shirt was nearly thread bare and stretched out; it was likely very comfortable and didn't restrict Joe's movements.

Levon arched an eyebrow when he spotted the small dumbbell sitting on the floor. "You brought that?"

Joe shrugged, looking embarrassed. "Minnie said to pack for a few days."

Levon chuckled. "Gotta hand it to you, boy, you definitely know how to pack for all occasions."

Joe glared at him, but the look was laced more with amusement than anger. "Shut up."

Levon just grinned. "You got yer list?"

Joe gave him another dirty look, but handed him a piece of paper. Levon gave it a quick glance. Nothing he didn't have at least a passing familiarity with. Most shoulder injuries seemed to have the same basic set of therapeutic exercises, and Levon had enough of his own over the years to recognize the standard set of movements.

Levon nodded, taking a deep breath. "Okay, let's do this thing."

Joe huffed out a soft breath of laughter. "It's not going to be that bad."

"Well, not for me, no." Levon shrugged, looking away. "I'm just the guy makin' you do all the hard stuff."

Joe reached out to lightly caress Levon's cheek with one knuckle. "And I appreciate it."

Levon bit his lower lip, hesitantly making eye contact. "You sure about this?"

"Sure enough for both of us."

Levon smiled. "Kind o' getting to be a standard answer for you."

Joe grinned, leaning in to give Levon a light kiss. "I don't mind."

"All right then," Levon kissed Joe back, "let's start at the top of the list and work our way down." He fixed Joe with a firm look. "You tell me if it gets to be too much. Ya hear?"

"I'll tell you if it's too much."

"Good." Levon nodded. "From the top it is."

They started with a few simple warm up exercises. Levon was pleased with how easily Joe handled those. No sign of pain or hesitation. It made Levon feel more confident and comfortable touching Joe.

As the exercises got progressively more difficult, Joe started to curse. Softly first but with growing volume as pain, residual weakness and tenderness made themselves known. Levon kept a close eye on him to make sure the discomfort level wasn't excessive and that Joe wasn't pushing too hard. Sarah had listed the number of repetitions for each exercise, but Levon figured those were more like guidelines than absolutes. He also figured Joe would attempt to do twice as many as Sarah had suggested, no matter what he'd said earlier.

"Ten," Levon counted firmly, before preventing Joe from doing another.

"I can do-"

"Can, but you ain't gonna." Levon shook his head. The muscles under his hand twitched involuntarily. "Your hand is shaking."

"Damn." Joe frowned, clearly surprised by that bit of information. He carefully set the dumbbell on the floor.

Levon lightly rubbed Joe's arm and shoulder, seeking any excessive heat the same way he would for an overworked horse. "You pack any liniment?"

"Yeah." Joe muttered, looking down, disappointment and frustration readily apparent in his body language.

Levon placed a knuckle under Joe's chin gently forcing his head up. "Hey," he smiled, "only yer second day, boy. Nothin' ta be upset over."

"It's five pounds," Joe protested, giving the dumbbell a disgusted look.

"And in a few weeks it'll be fifteen." Levon caressed Joe's cheek. "You know how it works."

"Doesn't mean I like it."

Levon laughed. "Don't think anyone is gonna ever make the mistake of thinking you like this."

Joe's lips curled in a wry smile. "Shut up."

"You want a massage?" Levon asked, already knowing the answer.

Joe arched an eyebrow. "Have I ever said no?"

"First time for everything."

"Not today there isn't."

Levon grinned. "Where'd ya put the liniment?"

Joe pointed to his bag, before finding a more comfortable position to sit on the corner of the bed. Levon found the small, unlabelled tube in the side pocket. He wasn't sure exactly what the stuff was but suspected it was some high end, better smelling version of Ben-gay. Levon knew it was good for sore muscles, having used it a time or two himself.

He squirted a dollop into his hands, rubbing them together to warm the gel. Levon watched Joe remove his t-shirt, letting the man struggle with it himself knowing his lover wouldn't appreciate an offer of help. He understood it wasn't just about pride or being stubborn. Being able ta do the little things for yourself, Levon thought, is how ya prove yer okay.

He thought about asking Joe to lie down, but the bed wasn't really firm enough for a quality massage in that position. And it would be easier to work on Joe's sore shoulder with him sitting up.

"You ready?"

"Yeah."

Levon hesitated for a moment, taking a deep breath. He'd given Joe massages countless times before, soothing aching muscles when Joe had over done it at the gym or on the job. It would hurt some, but that wasn't intentional.

Levon moved to stand behind Joe. He started slowly, keeping his touch light. He noted any knots he felt for deeper work but didn't try to work them loose, knowing it would hurt less if he got Joe to relax more before he did. He smiled when Joe sighed softly.

"You have great hands."

Levon chuckled. "Have it on good authority rest of me ain't bad either."

Joe grinned, looking back over his shoulder. "Just a good authority?"

"The best." Levon gave him a quick kiss. "Feel better?"

"I will when you finish my massage."

Levon snickered. "Wise ass."

"You love me and you know it."

"Long as you know it," Levon squeezed one shoulder, resuming the massage.

He gradually deepened his touch, adding more pressure as he worked loose the knots he'd felt earlier. Levon listened carefully to Joe's breathing, using it as a guide for how much pressure to use, how long to focus on any one spot. He immediately pulled back when Joe flinched.

"It's okay, Cowboy," Joe said softly. "Just a little tender there."

Levon nodded, and reached for more liniment. It was a stalling tactic, one he was relieved Joe didn't call him on. When Levon was sure he could touch Joe without worrying too much about causing him pain he went back to working on Joe's shoulder.

Levon bit his lip, ignoring the moan Joe made when he hit another tender spot. He tried to soothe away that minor discomfort, relieved when Joe sighed deeply. Levon nodded to himself, pleased to feel the knot release, tension draining away from the muscles under his fingertips.

He continued working, finding the same enjoyment he always experienced when touching Joe. The solid muscle tone and smooth skin never failed to entice him, just begging him to explore the familiar, beloved territory.

When the temptation to taste as well as touch got the better of him, Levon kissed the back of Joe's neck. Joe hummed in appreciation, tilting his head to give Levon better access. It wasn't hard to locate the spot below Joe's ear that never failed to make him shiver. Levon sucked gently, before applying his teeth hard enough to leave a mark. Joe moaned softly, a low and breathy sound that made Levon hungry for more.

Levon missed being free to touch and taste Joe, to see his skin flushed with heat and desire, to hear him make those delightful sounds of pleasure. With Joe recovering from being shot, Levon had been hesitant to do too much. And with his family visiting, it wasn't like there had been much alone time for the two of them anyway.

"Missed you," Levon murmured against Joe's skin. "Missed this."

"Me too, Cowboy, me too."

Levon wrapped his arms around Joe, hugging him to his chest. Joe tipped his head back, resting it on Levon's shoulder before turning to place light kisses along the length of his jaw. The feel of Joe's soft lips against his skin made Levon shiver.

Joe leaned more heavily into Levon, forcing him to lie back on the bed. He turned, staying within the circle of Levon's arms. Joe smiled down at him.

"Hey," Joe whispered, eyes a warm aqua.

"Hey yerself." Levon smiled back.

Joe closed the distance between them capturing Levon's lips in a sweet kiss. Levon sighed, lips parting willingly under his lover's gentle assault. Their tongues met, greeting each other in a playful dance that was both new and familiar.

Levon moaned when Joe's hands worked their way under his shirt, fingertips brushing against his nipples. He arched his chest, trying to encourage more contact. When he couldn't get it, Levon pulled away from Joe's tempting mouth, huffing out a breath in frustration.

He wanted more skin against his and he wanted it now. Levon wiggled, trying to squirm free of his clothing. He sighed deeply when he finally succeeded in escaping his shirt.

Joe's hands felt wonderful; so warm against his skin, like firebrands. They raised goose bumps as they ghosted over his flesh. Levon shuddered, a low moan escaping when Joe bent his head to lave his right nipple. Levon's fingers tangled in Joe's dark hair, holding him in place as he applied lips, tongue and teeth to that sensitive nub.

"God...Joe..." Levon gasped when Joe shifted his focus to the left nipple while talented fingers played with the right. He bit his lower lip, struggling to contain little mewling noises of pleasure.

Joe raised his head, looking up at Levon from under impossibly long, dark lashes. His pupils so large his eyes were almost black. Joe smiled, feral and hungry.

Levon pulled in a shaky breath, instinctively responding Joe's heated gaze. He shifted, hips moving as he tried to get comfortable in the confines of his almost painfully tight jeans. Joe reached for his belt, undoing the silver buckle with practiced ease. Levon couldn't quite contain a whimper as Joe opened his button fly slowly.

Levon raised his hips, giving Joe room to push his jeans and boxers down and out of the way. A little wiggling and they were completely off.

"You need help with those sweats, boy?" Levon asked, hands already moving to hurry the process along.

He got sidetracked from his goal, fingers finding caressing Joe's ass more interesting. Levon loved the way those firm globes nicely filled his hands, the way the muscles flexed and clenched in response to his touch. He nuzzled Joe's neck, applying his teeth lightly before licking away the pain he caused. Levon grinned in reaction to Joe's breathy moan.

He sucked hard at the spot he'd bitten a moment ago. Levon was determined to mark Joe, to lay claim to his lover. There would be no mistake in the future---Joe wasn't a free agent, he was part of a couple. And he was damn sure going to stay that way if Levon had anything to say about it.

"Again." Joe growled, a low, rumbling sound. "Do it again."

Levon shivered. Joe knew, and he understood. Levon bit him again using enough force to bruise but not break the skin. He licked the spot before placing a whisper soft kiss there.

Pulling Levon closer, Joe whimpered. It was a small, needy sound that Levon loved hearing. It always gave him a rush to have proof he'd reduced his normally verbal partner to the most basic of noises, forcing him to communicate more through touch and action rather than words.

Joe rolled, laying completely over Levon, pinning him firmly to the bed with his weight. Levon's hips moved, instinctively thrusting against his lover. The soft terry cloth of the sweats Joe was still wearing created a delightful friction against his heated flesh. Levon sighed deeply, repeating the action.

Joe moved his hands, fingers tangling in Levon's hair as he held him in place and ravished his mouth. Levon surrendered easily, letting Joe have control of the kiss. He sucked on Joe's tongue, reveling in the taste and feel of him.

Levon's fingers flexed, clutching and massaging Joe's ass. He continued to rub against his lover, answering Joe's thrusts with his own. He sucked in a desperate breath when Joe finally broke the kiss, both of them panting.

"God." Levon hissed when Joe gave him a hickey, making a matching claim of his own.

Levon moaned as Joe continued to lick and nibble along the side of his neck. He trembled, hips thrusting in an erratic rhythm when Joe began lavishing attention on his right earlobe. It wasn't normally a spot that caused such an intense reaction, but right now it was the hottest thing Levon had ever experienced.

Everything felt so good, so right. He'd missed this, missed feeling so connected, missed the weight of Joe against him. Levon hadn't realized just how much until now.

His movements took on a frantic urgency as Levon continued to rub his groin against Joe. He moaned softly as Joe moved to match his thrusts, increasing their speed. He could feel Joe's breath against his skin as his lover whispered something over and over. He wasn't sure what Joe was saying, but he could understand the meaning well enough.

Joe captured his mouth again in a sloppy, wet kiss. Levon gasped, pulling in Joe's breath then giving it back to him. His tongue played with Joe's before rubbing against the roof of Joe's mouth. That caress earned him a delightful little shimmy so Levon did it again and again.

He could feel that tell tale tingle at the base of his spine, that little harbinger of the on coming wave. Levon didn't try to hold it back, wasn't sure he could have if he wanted to. He let his orgasm roll over him, muscles clenching so tightly it was nearly painful as he found his release.

Levon trembled in the aftermath. He buried his face in Joe's shoulder, breathing in the scent of his lover.

"You...okay...Cowboy," Joe panted, rubbing his cheek against Levon's hair.

"I'm good." Levon raised his head. "You?"

Joe smiled, kissing the tip of his nose. "Never better."

"Good." Levon sighed, eyes closing. He was fairly confident he could stay exactly where he was for the rest of his life.

"Levon?"

"Hmmm?"

"Think we might need to get cleaned up before Minnie starts calling us for dinner."

"Ya think?" Levon chuckled, opening his eyes.

"She's your grandmother." Joe grinned at him. "You really want her to see you au natural?"

"Accordin' ta her, she's already seen my bare butt more than once." Levon grinned back, shaking his head. "Why do people who changed yer diapers always gotta remind you they did?"

"No idea." Joe laughed softly. "But my aunts do the same thing."

"Maybe it's a woman thing," Levon suggested lazily, still not entirely convinced he really to get up any time soon.

"Well I want a shower." Blue eyes sparkled. "And I'd like you to join me."

"Should have started with that." Levon gave Joe a quick kiss. "Definitely good incentive ta move."

"Nice to know where I rank."

"Always at the top, Joe." Levon rested his forehead against Joe's. "Always."

Joe smiled softly. "You're the top of my list too."

Joe double checked Levon's bedroom, blue eyes touching on every flat surface, looking for anything he might have forgotten. He hadn't really packed that much or anything he couldn't live without if left behind, but making sure he had everything was an ingrained habit.

"Ya got everythin'?"

"Think so."

Joe reached for the handles of his duffle bag but Levon beat him to it, shouldering the bag with ease. Joe scowled. "I can carry that, you know."

"I know." Levon grinned at him, obviously not bothered by Joe's dark look.

"I am not an invalid."

"Know that too."

"Then why-"

"You saying I can't do somethin' nice for you just cause I want to?"

Joe blinked. "Of course not."

"Good." Levon leaned in and gave him a quick kiss. "I'm just going to cart your stuff ta the Jimmy. Not like I'm offering ta carry you."

Joe laughed. He held up his hands in surrender. "Okay. Have it your way."

"Thanks." Levon smiled warmly, eyes sparkling. Joe couldn't believe what a difference a two good nights of sleep and several good meals could make.

It hadn't just been good for Levon. Joe knew the last two days had been good for him as well. He felt better than he had since before he got shot.

We should have come to see Minnie sooner, Joe thought with a smile. Her home certainly offered a neutral, safe territory for them to reconnect and deal with everything that had happened. Not only that, but Minnie also gave each of them the sort of unconditional support that few of Joe's family could offer.

He wished he'd have thought to introduce Rosa to Minnie. Joe was sure they'd get along, although the same probably couldn't be said for his Aunt Teresa and Minnie. He couldn't see Minnie putting up with Teresa with even half the grace Levon had shown.

Of course, putting up with Teresa was part of the reason they'd ended up at Minnie's in the first place. Joe sighed silently as he closed the bedroom door behind him. Levon still had a tendency to flinch if Joe startled him or moved too fast when he was within arms length. And Joe knew his lover was second guessing himself frequently, leery of losing control and lashing out again. It wasn't something Joe genuinely thought Levon had to worry about, but he could understand Levon's fear of being anything like his father.

Joe knew Levon needed to talk about it more than they had. He thought Levon should see a professional, but knew all too well how even suggesting therapy would go over. Joe couldn't really see his very private lover spilling his guts to a stranger. Hell, Beaumont had been Levon's partner for years and there were still things she didn't know about him.

Joe had taken a few classes in psychology. He hoped that limited knowledge, combined with Levon's trust, would be enough for him to be able to help his partner work through his fear. Joe wasn't averse to asking for advice from a licensed therapist, especially when he didn't have to look any further than his own family for one. One advantage of having such a large extended family was the diversity of professions and level of expertise Joe could call on when he needed help.

Joe was certain it would be better to initiate any sort of conversation on the subject where Levon would feel more comfortable talking about it. Mother Minnie's place was a safe haven for nearly everything but talking about Levon's father. Even now, Joe knew Levon was still trying to protect her from knowing how bad things had been for him as a child. A wasted effort given what she'd told Joe when he arrived but Joe wasn't sure Levon needed to know that.

Minnie met them in the living room. She smiled, holding out a tin of what had to be home made cookies to Joe. She habitually sent little packages of home cooked sweets, and never let them leave without some treat.

"Thought you might like to have something to take with you."

"Thank you, Minnie." Joe leaned down to kiss her cheek.

"Thanks, Mother Minnie." Levon kissed her other cheek. "For everything."

She smiled at him, raising a hand to cup Levon's face. "You don't have to thank me for anything, Little Levon."

Joe stifled his smile when he saw the faint color rise in Levon's cheeks. He felt like it leveled the playing field a bit. It was only a week ago his Aunts were doing the same thing to Joe...making him feel like he was five and enjoying the sensation more than he thought he should.

"Y'all drive carefully."

"Yes, Ma'am."

"And call me when ya get home, ya hear?"

"Yes, Ma'am."

"Yer a good boy, Levon." She smiled at Joe. "You too, Joseph."

That endorsement never failed to warm Joe all the way to his toes. It was just so reassuring to have someone he genuinely respected tell him he was well thought of. Someone other than a family member who might feel obligated to say things like that whether they meant it or not.

"You take care of yourself, Minnie."

"Always do, Joe." Minnie patted his cheek. "You take good care o' my boy."

"I will."

He didn't see Levon roll his eyes but Joe would have bet money his lover did just that. Levon would readily admit to needing Joe in his life, but most of the time he baulked at the suggestion he needed Joe to take care of him. Joe didn't take it personally. He understood. It would be similar to admitting to being weak, something neither of them truly considered themselves to be.

Minnie followed them outside, stopping on the porch to watch them get in the Jimmy and back out of the drive way. They both waved. She waved back before heading back inside.

Joe sighed, settling into his seat. "We should come here more often."

Levon chuckled. "You sure ya want that?"

Joe rolled his head to look at Levon, frowning. "Why would I not want to see Minnie more often?"

"Could have sworn I heard ya complaining 'bout her cooking."

"What!!" Joe's mouth dropped open, staring at Levon in astonishment. "I never-"

"Why does everything she make have to taste so damn good?" Levon mimicked Joe's accent and inflection surprisingly well. "Did she bake another apple pie? I'm going to get fat eating all this. I'm telling you, Cowboy, my pants won't fit if this keeps up."

Joe laughed. He had said that.

Levon waved a hand. "I mean, I know you gotta worry about keepin' that girlish figure-"

"Girlish figure?" Joe snickered, before mock glaring at his lover. "Are you saying you don't like my figure?"

Levon gave him a considering, heated glance. "Oh, I like your figure. Like it just fine."

Joe stifled a shudder, trying not to reveal how much that rough drawl affected him. Having reconnected on a physical level at Minnie's, Joe felt like a junky constantly in need of another fix. He gave Levon a dirty look.

"You are an evil man."

Levon grinned. "You just noticing that now?"

"I've known that about you for awhile now." Joe shook his head. "Just keeps surprising me how much I like it."

Levon laughed. "You are so easy."

Joe smirked. "But I'm not cheap."

Levon reached over to take his hand. "Worth every penny."

Joe ducked his head, trying to hide his blush. "You are a hopeless romantic."

"Goes so well with being evil." Levon snickered. "Like beer and pretzels."

Joe laughed. He placed a kiss on Levon's knuckles. He'd missed this easy rapport. He'd forgotten how lighthearted and funny Levon could be.

Levon sighed softly, squeezing Joe's hand. Joe gave him inquiring glance, sensing a shift in his lover's mood, but not understanding why. He waited patiently.

Levon bit his lower lip. "You got therapy tomorrow?"

"Yeah." Joe raised both eyebrows, silently asking why Levon was asking when he already knew the answer.

"You want me to go along?" Levon's lips curled into a half smile, belying the earnest look in his eyes.

Joe smiled. "I always want you with me, Cowboy."

"Even when I get a little-"

"Even then." Joe squeezed Levon's hand. He actually thought recreating the situation that brought everything to a head might be a good thing. It would give them a chance to work through it a second time, ideally with a different outcome.

"I'll be on my best behavior."

"I have no doubts about that."

Until Levon had taken off at a dead run in the heat of the day, Joe had no idea his session with Sarah had bothered his lover as much as it had. The man might have been a little distant with her, less friendly than he usually was, but he wasn't rude to her. In hindsight, given how much mental and emotional turmoil Levon had been dealing with at the time, his restraint was actually rather impressive.

"Won't run off afterward either." Levon gave him a look, obviously knowing what Joe had been thinking. "Promise."

"Appreciate that, Cowboy, but I don't need you to promise anything." Joe raised their joined hands to place another kiss on Levon's knuckles. "I trust you."

Levon worried his lower lip again. "Still not sure ya should."

"Yeah, I know." Joe smiled softly. He'd be working on that, probably for some time to come. It is a good thing I'm a patient man, Joe thought, persistent too. "I have enough trust for both of us."

Levon sighed, nodding once. "Sorry."

Joe shook his head. "Nothing to apologize for, Cowboy."

Levon smiled. "I tell you lately that I love you?"

"Was hoping you'd show me." Joe waggled his eyebrows.

Levon huffed out a breath in a small laugh. "You are insatiable."

"Only for you, Levon. Only for you."

"Be sure it stays that way." Levon gave him a fierce look, before he winked at Joe. "Ya hear?"

"I hear and obey, Oh Master."

Levon grinned. "Now that, I could get used to."

Joe rolled his eyes. "I'm sure."

"Little bowin' now and again wouldn't be a bad thing either."

Joe snorted. "Keep dreaming, Cowboy."

Levon gave him a slant eyed look. "Bet I could give ya a good reason ta be on your knees."

Joe tried not to react to Levon's tone, the blatant innuendo, or the image both created for him. He cleared his throat, shifting in his seat. "I hate you."

"No you don't."

"Don't you forget it." Joe growled. He did a passable imitation of Levon's accent. "Ya hear?"

Levon dipped his head, a bit more color in his cheeks than there was a moment ago. "I hear."

Joe grinned. "I don't get the rest?"

Levon grimaced. "Not calling you Master, boy. So jus' forget that right now."

Joe licked his lips. Teasing could go both ways. "Oh...I'll bet I could get you to call me Master." His voice was husky when he spoke again, laced with promise. "Just takes a little effort."

"Stop that." Levon shook his head, gaze resolutely focused on the road. "I'm driving."

"So drive faster." Joe was looking forward to getting home---for more than one reason, but at the moment the thought of getting naked with Levon and making him howl like a coyote was certainly at the top of the list.

"I can do that." The Jimmy surged forward. "Be home before ya know it."

They'd better be. Joe shifted in his seat. Too long and they'd have to find some quiet spot by the side of the road. He grinned. That wouldn't be a bad alternative either.

Levon took a deep breath and squared his shoulders. It wasn't like he'd done anything in front of Sarah that he needed to be embarrassed about. There was no way she could have known what he was thinking the last time he'd accompanied Joe to his therapy session. At least he hoped she didn't.

Joe looked at him, eyebrow arched. "You okay, Cowboy?"

"Just feelin' a little stupid." Levon's fingers clenched the steering wheel.

"Don't worry about it." Joe smiled. "No one but me knows you came a little unglued."

"Think it was a bit more than that." Levon grimaced. While he was relieved Joe seemed intent on down playing the whole thing, Levon almost wished he wouldn't. He'd all but accused Joe of cheating on him, and then compounded that insult by hitting him. That was more than just 'coming a little unglued' in Levon's opinion.

Joe turned in his seat to face Levon. "Do you think other couples never fight?"

Levon snorted. "Not that naïve, Joe."

"So we had ourselves a fight." Joe reached out to cup his cheek. "It was stuff we needed to talk about. Clear the air and get our heads screwed on straight. It's not the end of the world. And it sure as hell isn't the end of us. Ya hear me?"

Levon turned his head to place a kiss in Joe's palm. "I hear ya."

"Good." Joe smiled gently. "And no one in there knows we fought. And they sure as hell don't need to know what we fought about. So, you have no reason to be embarrassed, or ashamed, or even to feel a little stupid."

Levon's lips quirked upward. "Ya sure about that?"

"Sure enough for both of us."

Levon knew that would be his answer. It was rapidly becoming a new 'thing' for them. And Levon found it decidedly reassuring that Joe could say it every single time without any hesitation, without any doubt.

He took a deep breath. "Okay...let's go do this thing."

Joe grinned. "Now you're talking."

They got out of the Jimmy and walked into the gym. Levon was still amazed by the diversity of equipment available. He wondered why the hell anyone would want to ride a bike that when nowhere. He'd never understood treadmills either. Although, given the heat and humidity that defined Houston, Levon could see the appeal of exercising in an air conditioned place. But he still thought it would be very boring in comparison to running his usual route. No dog to dodge that's for sure, Levon thought with a mental smirk.

This time of day the gym wasn't very busy. Levon thought that was probably why they'd made space for a physical therapy department. It would definitely make use of the equipment and justify having the lights on at two in the afternoon when most people wouldn't have time to utilize the facility.

The receptionist greeted them with a smile. "Good afternoon."

Levon tipped his head in acknowledgement of the greeting while Joe smiled and responded with a 'good afternoon' of his own.

"You're appointment is with Sarah?"

"Yes."

"She'll be right with you."

"Thanks."

Sarah showed up a few minutes later. She smiled brightly. "Hello, Joe. How are you feeling today?"

"I'm good, Sarah." Joe returned her smile.

"You kept up with your exercises?"

"I have." Joe rotated his shoulder as though proving his claim.

She smiled at Levon. "Hello, Levon."

"Ma'am." Levon raised two fingers to the brim of his hat. He forced himself not avoid eye contact or fidget.

"We should be done in about an hour if you want to come back." She gestured toward the small waiting area. "I'm afraid all the magazines are still out of date and they are working on the cable today."

Levon wasn't sure what to make of her suggestion. The last time he'd stayed and she hadn't said anything about him watching from the lounge. Had he seemed antsy to then? Maybe she thought he'd been bored or impatient. Levon ducked his head, feeling his face warm as it occurred to him that he might have made her nervous with this intense scrutiny the last time. Joe said he hadn't really noticed anything odd about his behavior, but maybe Sarah had caught Levon glaring daggers at her.

"Actually, Sarah, if it's all right with you, I'd like to have Levon watch." Joe gave her a charming smile. "He's been helping me with my exercises, so I thought it might be a good idea for him to keep up on what you're doing."

"Oh." She looked surprised by Joe's request, before nodding eagerly. "That would be great. It's not often we get people willing to learn how to help friends and family. Most seem to think it should be just the therapist and aren't interesting in hanging around. Or that they only have to do the exercises when they're here."

"We know better than that." Joe's smile turned rueful. "Benefit of past experience."

"I don't like to get repeat business." Sarah shook her head, wagging a finger at Joe.

"I'll do my best."

"I'd appreciate that." She waved a hand. "Follow me and we'll get started."

Levon followed a few steps behind, not wanting to get in the way. Sarah led Joe through the same series she'd assigned before, using a small hand weight, gauging his progress. She seemed pleased with how well he was doing, even though Joe was not happy working with such a light weight.

"You'll work up to more, Joe," she told him when he voiced his disappointment over how hard it was to be working with just five pounds when he was used to handling so much more. "It will just take some time."

Joe grimaced but didn't argue. Levon wondered if it sounded better coming from her than it did from him. Maybe it just carried more weight because she was a professional in the field. Or maybe it was because she could say all that and not sound like a hypocrite. Levon would have been trying to push himself as hard as Joe wanted to.

After finishing with the weight, Sarah handed Joe what looked like a heavy rubber band and demonstrated what she wanted Joe to do. Watching her work without insecurity and jealousy color his perspective, Levon could see why she routinely touched Joe. It clearly helped her to judge his level of effort and control his actions so he did the exercises correctly without hurting himself. Levon cocked his head to one side, frowning as Sarah continued to lead Joe through a series of moves the blond was completely unfamiliar with.

"Something wrong, Levon?" Sarah asked.

"No, Ma'am." He shook his head. "Jus'...don't have anything like this for Joe ta work with at home."

"The gym has some you could borrow. We have plenty." She pointed to the shelf where she'd gotten the bands for Joe to use. She smiled wryly. "Not many of my clients have their own equipment, or the inclination to use ours other than during their scheduled sessions."

Levon nodded. Seeing the various colors available, Levon asked, "They all the same?"

"Each color is a different resistance level. Yellow is the easiest, then red and green. Black is the least flexible."

Joe grimaced looking at the yellow band he held. Levon pointed his finger at him. "Don't pout. It's jus' like the weights. Ya gotta work up to more."

"Why is it you're never that sensible when it's your turn?"

"Because."

"That is not an answer."

"Was ta your niece." If he'd heard Emma say it once, Levon had heard it a hundred times. It seemed to be her standard reply to nearly every question.

Joe snorted. "You can't use a teenager's logic."

"Don't see why not." Levon shrugged one shoulder. "Pretty sure you have."

"I have not."

"Yeah, you have." Levon grinned, giving Joe a knowing look. He could name time, date and phase of the moon if need be. And Joe knew it.

Levon waggled his eyebrows. "Thought it was your shoulder that needed work, not yer memory."

Joe grimaced. "Shaddup."

Levon laughed softly. "I win."

"It's no wonder Emma liked you." Joe rolled his eyes. "You are her age."

"Yer just a sore loser." Levon snickered. He pointed to the band Joe was holding, looking at Sarah. "Can you show me what you were doing with that? Would help if I know what ta do when Joe uses that thing at home."

"Certainly." She smiled warmly at him. "Best way is to do it yourself. Grab one of the bands and I'll go through what I just did with Joe."

Levon reached for one of the yellow bands. Not sure how much resistance they actually offered, he figured it would be better to start off with the lightest one. He didn't have anything to prove. And there was no point in rubbing Joe's face in the fact Levon could use something harder than Joe was allowed to play with.

Sarah showed him how to do the exercises she'd just done with Joe. He hadn't expected them to actually be hard to do, and they weren't, but he could see how they could be. They worked the muscles in his shoulder and chest differently than weights, emphasizing control and flexibility rather than just strength.

"Shame they didn't have these when I messed up my shoulder."

"You hurt your shoulder?"

"Not recently." Levon waved off the concern he could hear in Sarah's question. "And not quite like Joe."

"You weren't shot?" Sarah knew they were both on the force, so it was a logical question.

"No. I wasn't a cop then." He shook his head as he realized just how long it had been. He gave her a wry smile. "Therapy's come a ways in fifteen years."

She laughed softly. "I should hope so." Sarah looked at Joe. "You up for a little more?"

"Sure."

She led Joe through a set of empty handed exercises. Like with the weight, Levon recognized most of them. He made note of how many reps she recommended. Joe would likely push himself to do more unless someone kept an eye on him, or the movements became too painful for him to continue. Getting to that point would be counterproductive and was best avoided.

Although most of the exercises had been relatively light and easy in comparison to Joe's usual work out, he was sweating and his breathing reflected the level of effort required. Levon could see faint lines of stress and pain forming around Joe's eyes. He was just about to say something, to stop his partner, when Sarah spoke.

"I think that's enough for today, Joe."

Joe frowned, shaking his head. "Just a few more."

Sarah gave him a pointed look. "Your shoulder already hurts."

"How-"

"I'm not new at this." She rolled her eyes. "I can tell when my patients aren't pushing hard enough, and when they are pushing too hard. And, you are pushing too hard."

"I'm not going to get better if I don't-"

"Too much too soon and you will never get better."

Levon appreciated her matter-of-fact, uncompromising attitude. He was glad he hadn't said or done anything on his last visit that would have put her at odds with him. It would take both of them to keep Joe in line. And he had a feeling she would have had no more trouble than Mother Minnie did when it came to putting Levon in his place. Levon fought down a giggle when it occurred to him he was better off being queer since he was piss poor at winning an argument when it came to women.

"You know...you are going ta get ta do all this tomorrow," Levon offered when it looked like Joe might try to argue with Sarah. Why he thought he'd win, Levon couldn't even begin to guess.

He held up the yellow band he hadn't bothered to return to the shelf. "We're even taking some of Sarah's toys home with us. Not like you can't play with them again."

Joe gave him a dirty look, but Levon could see the smile he was trying to hide. He grinned back, pulling that lurking smile to the surface.

"Yeah, okay."

Levon nodded. He knew better than to make a big deal of how easily Joe had given in. He also knew better than to think it was good sense. It was far more likely Joe's shoulder hurt like hell.

A few painkillers and a massage would fix that...at least temporarily. Time would be necessary for a permanent solution. Levon ardently hoped Joe's shoulder healed better than his had. Most of the damage Levon experienced occurred to connective tissue, while the bulk of Joe's injury involved muscle. Muscle usually healed better than tendons and ligaments...at least that's what the doctors had told Levon.

"I'll see you in three days, Joe." Sarah said, pulling Levon from his thoughts. "The same time good for you?"

"That's fine." Joe nodded.

"I'll write up what we did here today so you can continue to do the exercises at home." She pointed a finger at him. "You stay with five pounds, the band, and only as many reps as I tell you."

"Scout's honor."

Levon snorted. He wasn't going to tell Sarah Joe was never a scout. It didn't matter. Levon would make sure he followed orders.

Sarah wrote up the list for them, handing it to Joe. She looked him in the eyes. "Remember, you do only what is on here."

"Yeah."

Clearly less than happy with Joe's lackluster response, she looked at Levon. "You'll see that he does?"

Levon raised two fingers to the brim of his hat. "Yes, Ma'am."

"Suck up." Joe muttered as Sarah moved way to greet who was obviously her next patient.

"Not too sure she couldn't kick my ass, boy." Levon laughed softly, walking in step with Joe as they left the therapy area. "And with one wing in a sling, I'm sure she could kick yours. Can't blame me for going with the winnin' team."

Joe rolled his eyes. "Wuss."

"Hello, Pot." Levon grinned. "One call ta yer Aunt Rosa-"

"Shaddup."

"I win."

Joe chuckled. "You are such a pain in the ass."

Levon's grin grew wider. "But you love me anyway."

"Absolutely."

Levon held open the door for Joe. "And since we were both good boys, I think some sort of reward is in order."

"Oh?" Joe arched an eyebrow, blue eyes brightening. "And just what sort of reward did you have in mind?"

"Ice cream."

Joe gave a startled laugh. That was clearly not what he expected. "Ice cream?"

"Sure." Levon gave Joe a sly look, letting his voice drop a bit. "Were you thinking somethin' else?"

Joe snorted, lightly smacking Levon's arm. "You know I was."

"Guessing a little afternoon delight was more what you had in mind."

"Well, duh!"

Levon laughed, waggling his eyebrows. "No reason we can't have both."

"Now that's more like it." Joe nodded. "Thinking drive thru."

"You don't maybe want to get something for home?"

Levon had meant the question to be completely innocent, not realizing how it might have sounded until Joe stopped walking. He watched Joe take a slow, deep breath and swallow hard. It wasn't hard to picture exactly what Joe was thinking.

"Please, tell me you meant what I think you meant."

Levon smiled. Mother Minnie hadn't raised her any fools. "Absolutely."

Joe headed for the Jimmy. "Chocolate sauce?"

"Sure." Levon's smile turned coy as he unlocked the doors. "Can even have whip cream if ya want."

"God, Cowboy." Joe shuddered as he slid into the passenger seat. "You are an evil man."

"Pretty sure you knew that already."

"There's no reason for you to keep proving it."

"That mean you don't want the chocolate sauce?"

"Hell, no."

"Figured."

"Shaddup and drive."

Joe woke slowly. He instinctively reached for his lover, frowning when he encountered nothing but empty space. Joe raised his head to squint at the clock. He nodded to himself when he saw it just after five. It was close to Levon's usual wake up time. Joe felt his lover's side of the bed again, smiling to himself when he realized he could feel a trace of warmth. Levon hadn't been gone long.

Over the past two weeks Levon had been sleeping better. The nightmares had tapered off since their return from Mother Minnie's. Talking about them had definitely helped. And so had the time they'd spent together. Joe had convinced Levon that he should take another week off from work, something that had been surprisingly easy to do. They'd gotten back most of their usual rhythm during that time.

Joe rolled out of bed, stretching carefully. His shoulder was improving, but it still reacted badly to sudden moves. Therapy was helping, slower than he'd like, but he was trying to practice patience.

His shoulder wasn't the only thing he was practicing patience with. Levon no longer flinched at sudden movement or loud noises. And he didn't hold himself still, as though he was afraid to move, when Joe got close to him. But Joe hadn't made much progress in getting his lover to talk more about what happened. More often than not, Levon simply clammed up or walked away.

So far his best chance of getting anything out of Levon was when his lover first got up. Joe had no idea why the early morning should make the man more approachable, less apt to avoid him and the issue, but so far it was the only time he'd found that he could get anything out of Levon at all. And he had to be cautious not to ask too much or push too hard. The last thing Joe wanted was a repeat of what caused the situation in the first place or making Levon pull away again.

Joe yawned, scrubbing a hand over his face. "Why the hell couldn't I fall in love with a night owl?"

He turned on the bedside light, squinting at the sudden illumination. He hated the brightness, but he detested stubbing his toes even more. It was easier to find his robe and slippers with the light on.

He shivered, pulling on soft, warm flannel robe he'd assumed ownership of. He shook his head. "Getting soft," Joe muttered to himself. It was either that or he was getting old. There was definitely a time when the current temperature wouldn't warrant any extra clothing.

He slid into his slippers before padding out of the bedroom. Joe took a deep breath in the kitchen, savoring the smell of fresh brewed coffee. He poured himself a mug, adding a little sugar and cream. He took a sip, sighing softly, grateful Levon had learned how to make coffee just the way Joe liked it.

Joe headed out the back door, cup in hand. He was not surprised to find Levon on the swing, a cup of coffee of his own steaming in the early morning chill. Levon raised an eyebrow at him.

"At this rate, gonna make a morning person out of you yet."

Joe snorted, sitting down next to Levon. "Don't bet on it, Cowboy."

Levon nodded agreeably. Joe could tell he was hiding a smile behind the rim of his coffee mug. He rolled his eyes. "Wise ass."

"I didn't say anything."

"You were thinking it."

Levon chuckled. "True."

Joe sipped his coffee. He knew if he waited long enough, eventually Levon would talk to him. It remained to be seen just how much he'd say. Baby steps, Joe told himself, were fine as long as they kept moving forward.

Joe sipped his coffee. He shifted so he was closer to Levon. He wasn't quite snuggling into him, but definitely sharing body heat.

Levon wrapped an arm around Joe's shoulders, smiling. "Thought you said it didn't get cold here?"

"It doesn't." Joe sighed. "I'm getting soft."

Levon chuckled before turning his head to place a kiss on Joe's temple. "Long as I'm here ta keep ya warm, it won't matter much."

Joe smiled. "Guess that means I need to keep you around."

Levon's expression sobered and he looked away. "You know...the last couple....you know I wasn't...I didn't mean ta push you away."

"I know that." Joe whispered, leaning in to Levon. It wasn't as if Levon had actively pushed Joe away, it was more like he'd withdrawn into himself at moments. But he could understand how Levon might view his actions differently.

"Was jus'...I spent most o' my life not wantin' ta be like my old man. And then, I did the one thing I swore I'd never do." Sorrowful brown eyes met blue. "Know you already said it was okay and ya weren't mad, that ya understood, but I'm still sorry I hit you. An' it scares the hell out of me that I might do it again."

Joe wanted to pump his fist in the air and shout 'finally', but forced himself to sit still. If he made a big deal out of this breakthrough it would be the last one he'd ever see. And past experience told him if he sat quietly, Levon might just keep talking.

"I jus' reacted, Joe. Didn't think about what I was doing. Jus' lashed out at you." Levon looked away. "It could happen again."

"It could," Joe agreed calmly. He wasn't going to pretend differently; it wasn't like Levon would believe him if he did. "But I don't really think it will."

"Why not?" Levon arched an eyebrow. "Weren't like either o' us knew it was gonna happen the last time."

"Well, for one thing, we are communicating. We're talking about stuff we should have been talking about then. If we keep doing that, we shouldn't have the same pressure build up."

"No need for a release valve?"

"Well...I wouldn't go that far." Joe smiled softly. They were both far too volatile to have things ever run smoothly all the time. "We'll probably still need something...just not something that has either of us blowing up at each other."

Levon nodded. "Could put up a heavy bag in the barn."

Joe dipped his head, agreeing with the idea, although, he knew anger wasn't the main reason Levon had lashed out at him. It was more the byproduct of fear and an instinctive need to protect himself, but brining that up wasn't going to further the cause. And having something for Levon, other than running, as a way to work off extreme emotion would certainly lessen Joe's worry.

"Maybe you could find a spot for a weight bench in there and some free weights too." Having some place for Joe to work out wouldn't be a bad thing either. He wouldn't mind not needing to pay for a gym membership. "A treadmill for rainy days would be nice too."

"Probably." Levon's lips quirked upward in a half smile. "Could just give you some chores around here. That would work as well as all those dumbbells and what not."

Joe shook his head. "Not the same, Cowboy."

"So you keep telling me." Levon snorted.

"And I'll keep telling you until you believe me."

"Could take a long time, Joe." Levon's tone was solemn.

"Yeah, I know, but we are going the distance. We are running a marathon, not doing the hundred yard dash." Joe smiled gently. "And you are worth it."

"Thanks." Levon gave him a quick kiss. "For everything."

"You're welcome."

They sat on the swing in companionable silence for several minutes. Joe sipped his coffee. He was content to wait and see if Levon would say anything more or not.

"Was thinking..."

When Levon trailed off, Joe prompted him gently for more. "What were you thinking?"

"Don't really want to come out at work, but would you mind if we told Chicken?"

Joe blinked. He hadn't expected that, although, in hindsight he probably should have. Off the force, Chicken was Levon's best friend, and the closest thing to a brother the blond had.

"You think he'd be okay with us?"

"Think so. No way ta know for sure until we tell him." Levon shrugged one shoulder. "Not sure I want him for a friend any more if he don't accept us." Levon sighed softly. "I'm tired of hiding from damn near everyone we know here."

Joe nodded slowly. When Levon had thought Joe had been killed, there weren't many people he could turn to who'd understand what he was going through. Annie and Beaumont, for all Levon's fondness and respect for them, were not people he'd go to for emotional support. Mother Minnie wouldn't live forever. And the more people who knew about them as a couple, the less likely either of them would feel marginalized when faced with someone like Joe's Aunt Theresa.

"You want to tell him together?"

Levon smiled shyly. "I'd like to."

"Good." Joe smiled back. "So would I." Levon had been there for him when Joe wanted to come out to some of his family. He wanted to be there for Levon.

Levon chewed his lower lip. "When?"

"Whenever you are ready."

"Was thinking...when we go back ta work." Levon made the question more of a statement. "Stop in when it ain't busy like we usually do."

Joe nodded. Between the lunch rush and the after work crowd Chicken's place was essentially empty. It wasn't uncommon for Levon and Joe to stop in then. If the big man made a scene there wouldn't be any witnesses. If Chicken didn't accept them...they wouldn't be going back. If he did, well they'd be in the right place to celebrate.

"Sounds like a plan, Cowboy." Joe caught one of Levon's hands and squeezed gently. "Just let me know if you change your mind." He didn't want Levon to feel he had to say something to Chicken, or that Joe was pushing. Levon had let it be Joe's call to tell his family, it was only fair for him to do the same. Whenever Levon was ready, Joe would be there to back him up.

"Thanks." Levon gave him another kiss before sitting back and taking a deep breath.

Joe could almost see his lover putting everything that was bothering him back into a mental box. He wished Levon would talk to him more, but he was coming to terms with the Texan's bits and pieces approach to serious things that bothered him. Two fairly large bits had come up this morning and that was more than Joe had expected.

"You about ready ta start the day?"

Joe snorted. "I am up and moving. That is starting the day."

"We're burnin' daylight boy."

Joe rolled his eyes, more amused than annoyed. "Did we have anything we had to do today?"

"Had to?" Levon gave him a slant-eyed look. "Nothing on our busy social calendar. But now that you are awake and had yer coffee, I was thinking you'd be up for letting me have my wicked way with you."

Joe grinned. "I don't need coffee for that."

"Really?" Levon gave him a sly look. "You bitched jus' the other day about not getting your coffee."

Joe laughed, punching Levon lightly in the arm. "That was after, Cowboy. Not before. And you only made the road tar you drink that day."

"Wasn't like I did that on purpose." Levon rolled his eyes. "Yer pot bit the dust."

"Doesn't matter." Joe shook his head, his grin playful. "You still owe me one."

"Do I now?"

"Yes, you do."

Levon smiled, licking his lips slowly. "Think I know how I can make that up to you."

Joe shivered. He loved it when Levon's voice got low and rough. He swallowed hard. "Oh?"

Levon leaned in to whisper in Joe's ear, his warm breath ghosting over Joe's skin raised goose bumps all over. "How about I let you take me for a ride? I'll let you go as hard and as fast as you wanna."

Joe's mouth went dry. Their lovemaking since his 'resurrection' and starting therapy, while very satisfying, had been slow and gentle. Joe missed more rough and ready, vigorous aspects of their sex life.

He swallowed hard. "You sure?"

"Sarah said you could start working yer way back inta yer normal routine." Levon nibbled Joe's earlobe. "Think that was normal for us, yeah?"

"God yes." Joe shivered.

"Well, then, what do ya say we go make a little noise this morning?"

Joe grinned. Levon didn't have to ask him twice. "Led the way, Cowboy."

Levon slipped his colt into its holster, settling the weight with a shrug of his shoulders. It felt a little odd to be wearing it again. He hadn't worn the gun for more than a week. There hadn't been any need while he was home with Joe. But it was time to get back to work so the gun was once more part of his daily routine.

"You about ready, Cowboy."

"Me?" Levon rolled his eyes. "You're the one who was primping in the bathroom for twenty minutes."

"I was not primping." Joe pointed a finger at Levon. "I was just---"

"Taking an ungodly long time to make sure ya looked good," Levon grinned. "Yeah, I know."

Joe glared at him but the look lacked any real heat. He fidgeted restlessly, fingers playing with the sling Sarah thought Joe should continue wearing for at least another week. She'd quietly told Levon she didn't think the sling was truly necessary, that Joe had made a lot of progress toward a full recovery, but it would serve as a visual and physical reminder that Joe shouldn't over do it. She knew Joe well enough to realize he wouldn't think his clearance for desk duty should be seen as a serious limitation.

"Leave it alone, Joe."

Joe grimaced. "I hate this stupid thing."

"It's only for a couple o' days, Joe."

"I don't think I really need to-"

"Yer Aunt Rosa said you promised ta do what the doctor and yer therapist says ya should."

Joe shook his head. "I should have never let you talk to her before hanging up."

Levon grinned. "Too late now."

It wasn't like Joe really had a choice in whether or not Levon spoke to Rosa . She wasn't the sort to take no for an answer, especially not when she wanted to make sure her favorite nephew wasn't going back to work too soon or trying to do too much too soon. Or when she wanted to know if Levon needed any help getting Joe to toe the line. It was nice having her on his side. Although, he knew she'd be on Joe's side working to make Levon do what the doctor ordered if he'd been the one hurt.

"It's going to be hard to work with this thing on."

Levon rolled his eyes. "You know as well as I do all yer gonna do today is talk ta people and deal with paperwork, which in yer case will be mostly signing your name." There would be dozens of forms related to Joe taking sick leave, insurance and whatever else Beaumont had put on hold until he was back to work.

Joe glared at him. "And just what will you be doing?"

"Pretty much the same thing." Levon admitted with a shrug. He wasn't happy about being stuck at his desk, but he didn't want to work a case without Joe either. So until Joe was ready for the streets, Levon told Beaumont he'd was willing to ride a desk. It wasn't like he hadn't done it before---he just usually bitched about it more.

Levon smiled. "Only difference is I'll have fewer people wanting ta talk to me." Joe had been back to the office only once since `returning from the grave'. There were going to be a lot of people who wanted to see Joe in person to find out how he was doing, check on his recovery, and just to make sure he was really alive.

Levon doubted Joe would get anything else done. And that was just fine for his first day back because even doing only that much would be exhausting. Not that he expected Joe would admit to that.

"You ready for this?" Levon asked. "Could always take another day."

"I do not need anther day." Joe snorted. "I'm going nuts sitting here."

Levon nodded, accepting Joe's decision. He couldn't really blame his lover. There wasn't much else Joe enjoyed that could be done with only one good arm. Daytime television wasn't worth watching. And even as much as Joe liked to read, it got old after awhile. At least Levon had things he could do around the house and barn to keep him busy.

"All right then." Levon smiled, patting Joe on the arm. "Let's go do this thing."

Joe laughed. "It won't be that bad, Cowboy."

Levon snorted. "I'll ask you if ya still think that when we're on our way home."

Joe frowned. "How bad could it be?"

Levon arched an eyebrow. He couldn't understand how Joe could be so smart and still be so damn dense at times. Levon's tone was bone dry as he pointed out, "Ain't every day ya come back from the dead, boy."

Joe looked at him, blue eyes showing his confusion. "But...it's been-"

"Won't matter." Levon shook his head, slipping on his denim jacket. He wouldn't need it later, but the early morning chill was enough to make him want the added layer.

"Lot o' people didn't see you the day you were there. They'll want to see for themselves yer alive. " Levon said, his tone matter of fact. "And everyone else is gonna want to know how yer doing. Will want to know if you need anything. Will be looking for more information than Beaumont gave when she told them what was going on."

"I thought you said you filled everyone in on what she'd left out?"

"Everybody who mattered, yeah." To Levon that meant their immediate coworkers---Legs, Esteban, Joe-Bill, Annie, and a few others. "Didn't see any need to tell the whole building."

Joe grimaced. "Which means the gossip and rumors will be running wild."

"Would have anyhow." Levon shrugged. As far as he could tell, no matter what the profession gossip and rumor were just part and parcel to working with people. And even with all the information made available to them, people would still exaggerate or assume there was more to the story than they were being told.

Joe sighed. "You'll stay close?"

Levon smiled, giving Joe a quick kiss. "They get to be too much, I'll kick their asses for you."

Joe smirked. "My hero."

"An' you can thank me tonight." Levon grinned, giving Joe a saucy wink. "So let's do this thing."

They'd already agreed to take the Jimmy. It was easier for Joe to get in and out of, and Levon preferred to drive it to taking the Cobra. He'd never really felt all that comfortable driving the sports car. In his mind it was always Joe's car. He felt like he was trespassing being in the driver seat.

Levon sighed silently, appreciating how right it felt to have Joe next to him, going to work, the way it was supposed to be. He held out his hand to Joe, pleased when his lover took it. It was a little thing, but Levon liked having the physical connection. He'd gotten used to being able to freely touch Joe over the past week. Levon wasn't looking forward to censuring himself at the office even though he understood the necessity.

They traffic was relatively light and they made good time getting to the office. Levon forced himself to let go of Joe's hand as they pulled into the parking area. He had to let go some time. It was better to make the break here.

Levon parked in his usual spot, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly. Getting out of the Jimmy, he let the familiar quiet of the garage, the scents and smells wash over him. Reisner was his second home, and it felt good to be back, especially with Joe at his side.

Out of habit Levon checked to make sure Joe was walking with him, relieved to find him exactly where he was supposed to be. When Joe was `dead' being anywhere with out him felt decidedly odd, but especially the precinct building. Even before they were lovers, Joe had been an integral part of Levon's work a day world. It was where they spent the bulk of their waking hours.

They took the elevator up to their floor. When the doors opened, Levon wasn't entirely surprised to see a banner hanging on the wall welcoming Joe back to work. He smirked, seeing the look on Joe's face.

"You were missed."

Joe chuckled. "So I see."

Heading for the bullpen, it looked like everyone in the building was there to greet Joe. Levon let his partner move a step ahead of him, creating some space that others could get close enough to Joe and welcome him back. Levon made sure Joe couldn't be completely surrounded, ready to intervene if anyone got to enthusiastic in their greeting. Joe's shoulder was healing well, but Levon didn't think it was ready for too many back slaps, light punches, or any other manly man sort of greeting. Fortunately, the sling was a blatant signal to be careful.

Levon noticed he wasn't the only one keeping an eye out. Legs and Esteban were watching almost as closely as he was. It was good to know he had back up if it was needed.

Levon tried not to listen to what was being said. He didn't want to hear comments on how nearly fatal the video feed of the shooting made Joe's injury seem. Levon already knew that footage, frame by frame, by heart. He wasn't having nightmares about it any more, and Levon wanted it to stay that way.

He also didn't want to hear about how awful it was thinking Joe was killed. It had taken him long enough to come to terms with Joe's `death'. He didn't want to revisit it, even secondhand. And he didn't want to snarl at people how little they knew of just how awful thinking Joe was dead truly had been for him. It wasn't something they needed to know. Levon had never said a word to his coworkers about how Caroline's death affected him; he wasn't going to talk about Joe's either.

He didn't care to rehash how the FBI had fucked up. Or how funny it was to have them taken to task for their stupidity. Or speculation on how involved Joe's family might have been since it was a mob hit man who'd done the shooting.

Levon closed the gap between them when he saw Joe's smile start looking strained. His partner was more comfortable with crowds than Levon, but even Joe had his limits, particularly when dispersions were being cast on his family.

"How `bout y'all let us get back ta work." Levon's tone made it clear it wasn't a request. "Not like Joe won't be here all day if you wanna stop by later and chat."

Having Beaumont step out of her office and second that sentiment kept any dissention to a minimum. It didn't hurt that Legs and Esteban were also shooing people away. Levon hoped most of them would not be back, but he was betting the majority would straggle back throughout the day.

"When you get settled, Joe, stop by my office," Beaumont said, gimlet-eye on those officers leaving the bullpen for wherever they belonged.

"I'll be there in a few minutes, Lieutenant."

She nodded, eyes moving to Levon. She smiled at him, tipping her head. "Looks like the time off did you good, Levon."

Levon raised two fingers to the brim of his Stetson. He hadn't been sure she'd agree to giving him another week off, although why he had any doubts Levon wasn't sure. It wasn't like she hadn't pushed him in the past to rest, to recover, to take some time and heal. And unlike the rest of the people who'd greeted them this morning, Joanne knew just how much Joe's `death' hurt Levon. She been there when Caroline was killed, and understood the full impact and just how much Levon thought he'd lost.

"Thanks, Cowboy," Joe whispered to him as they were finally free to sit down at their desks.

"Told ya I'd kick their asses for you." Levon smiled. He would have too, if it had proven to be necessary. There were a few he might still smack around just on general principle for being so stupid as to talk badly about Joe's family in front of him.

Joe tipped his head toward Beaumont's office. "Nice of her to back you up."

"Still think she likes you best," Levon said with a grin.

Joe rolled his eyes. "She does not."

"Does too." Levon respond.

"No more spending time with my younger cousins for you." Joe pointed a finger at him, looking more amused than annoyed. "They are a bad influence on you."

Levon stuck his tongue out at Joe. He was pleased when Joe laughed, the lines of tension around his eyes and stiffness in his shoulders fading away.

"I'll be back," Joe said as he got up and headed for the lieutenant's office.

Levon went to the break room for a cup of coffee. It would be the first of many he was sure. Paperwork was hardly exciting. He poured a cup, breathing in the familiar, heady aroma. Joe might hate the coffee at the office, but to Levon it was just perfect.

Levon settled in at his desk, trying to studiously ignore what was going on around him while he focused on getting files organized and finalized paperwork for closed cases. His eyes kept drifting toward Beaumont's office watching for Joe. He knew it was stupid to worry about his partner. It wasn't like he was in trouble or in any danger, but Joe hadn't been out of his sight for nearly two weeks. Levon had gotten used to having him within easy reach.

Levon relaxed when Joe headed back to his desk. He looked up, silently asking if everything was okay as his partner sat down.

"Nothing to worry about, Lundy."

Levon nodded. He hadn't expected any problems, but it never hurt to make sure. Joe gave him a quick smile before reaching for a pile of papers stacked neatly in his inbox. His partner's smile faded and he sighed heavily.

"I hate paperwork," Joe grumbled.

"Could be worse."

Joe raised an eyebrow. "How do you figure that?"

"We could still be using clay tablets." Levon shrugged. "Bettin' those suckers got real heavy faster than paper does."

Joe chuckled. "Probably messier too."

"Probably," Levon agreed with a grin.

He eyed the clock, betting with himself how long it would take before someone appeared to talk to Joe. He was only off by three minutes when a patrolman stopped by Joe's desk. Levon subconsciously followed the conversation as he worked, not really paying attention to what was said as much as he was monitoring Joe's reaction and tone. As long as nothing upset Joe, Levon didn't plan to interrupt or interfere.

Over the next few hours a steady stream of people stopped by to talk to Joe. By noon, Levon wondered if Joe was as tired of answering the same damn questions over and over as Levon was hearing him do it.

"You wanna grab some lunch?"

"Only if we are leaving to do it."

His partner's tone and expression confirmed Levon's earlier musing. He stood up and stretched, trying to ease the stiffness sitting most morning at his desk had caused. "Heard there's a new place just a few blocks from here. Could walk over there."

Joe frowned, standing as well. "Walk?"

Levon shrugged. Walking anywhere wasn't really his thing, but he knew Joe was undoubtedly feeling restless. Levon certainly was. He could do with stretching his legs a little. And some fresh air, even if it came with Houston's heat and humidity, would be welcome.

"You afraid of some exercise?" Levon asked, giving Joe his best innocent expression.

Joe snorted. "That 'butter wouldn't melt in my mouth' look only works on people who don't know you."

"So you say." Levon settled his hat in place.

"You think I'm wrong?" Joe walked in step with him as they headed for the elevator.

"Not wrong. Just biased." Levon smirked. "Not like everyone knows me the way you do."

"No one else better know you the way I do." Joe growled.

Levon ducked his head, hiding a shy smile. "That's not something you need ta worry about, boy."

"Good." Joe pressed the button for the elevator. He grinned when the doors opened immediately. It was rare that the elevator appeared so quickly. "Our lucky day."

"Not sure it offsets all that paperwork." Levon stepped inside the car.

Joe followed him, blue eyes glancing round the empty space. He leaned against the doors when they closed, grinning. "I don't know, Cowboy, having this little bit of privacy could balance the scale a little."

Levon arched an eyebrow. "Meaning?"

Joe stepped closer, body brushing Levon's as he forced the blond against the wall. He leaned in, capturing Levon's mouth in a soft kiss. Levon sighed, mouth opening under the gentle onslaught.

They were always careful not to do much at the office. It was just too risky. Of course, the risk also made for a nice turn on.

The ding from the elevator, announcing the change in floor broke them apart before the kiss developed into more. The doors did not open, and they traded sheepish smiles recognizing just how lucky they were not to be discovered. They stepped apart, facing the doors. There was no point in pushing their luck.

"We'll finish that tonight."

"Definitely."

When the doors opened, they quickly stepped out, trying to avoid the people looking to get on. For reasons Levon couldn't quite understand the first floor always seemed to have a more people waiting for the elevator than any other. And they were always impatient about getting on.

"You'd think there was never gonna be another," Levon muttered as he made sure to shield Joe's injured shoulder from the half dozen people anxious to get in.

"There is only one, you know," Joe whispered back. "If they don't get this one, they'll be stuck here."

Levon laughed. "Like cattle milling around in a feed lot."

"Just missing the guy with a prod." Joe agreed with a grin.

"Don't think they'd let us use one o' those."

"Pity."

They waved to the desk sergeant before heading outside. Levon took a deep breath, enjoying being outside. He saw Joe do the same. His partner might still be a true city boy, but he had definitely come to appreciate fresh air. Or at least air as fresh as it ever got in Houston.

Levon's stomach growled. Having had nothing but coffee all morning, he was hungry.

"Guess we better see about getting that beast fed."

"S'what we left for."

"True enough." Joe nodded. "Tell me this place offers more than barbeque."

"You'll like it. Trust me."

"Always do, Cowboy." Joe smiled, lightly bumping Levon's shoulder. "Always."

Levon ducked his head, hoping to hide the pleased flush he knew was warming his face. "C'mon then, sweet talker, lets go get somethin' ta eat."

"Led on, Lundy."

Joe kept a wary eye out for Levon as he discreetly rubbed his shoulder trying to massage away the dull ache. After three days back to work, he'd managed to get Sarah to agree to let him stop wearing the sling. Levon had argued against the idea, but Joe had been adamant. He hated having his movements restricted. The last thing he wanted was to get an 'I told you so' look, or worse, have Levon actually say it.

"Ya want I should get yer sling out of the Jimmy?"

The quiet question came from behind Joe, startling him. He flinched, shooting a dark look over his shoulder. He should have known his partner was so close; the sneaky bastard was all too good at being quiet when he wanted to be. Joe wasn't surprised to know Levon had the damn sling nearby.

"I'm fine." Joe growled.

Levon moved so he was in front of Joe, one hip leaning against Joe's desk. He held out a bottle of over the counter painkillers. It wasn't like a little soreness wasn't expected after his physical therapy appointment, and it wasn't as though Levon didn't know how long it took to fully recover from a gunshot wound, but Joe stopped himself from reaching for the proffered bottle. He was reluctant to admit to any weakness.

"Takin' two isn't any worse than if you was admitting to a headache." Levon arched an eyebrow. "Unless you got something more going on I should know about."

Joe took the bottle. "I hate it when you get all logical and reasonable on me."

"Don't worry," Levon grinned, "it doesn't happen all that often."

"Often enough." Joe muttered, fighting back a grin. It always felt good to have this sort of banter between them.

"I'll be reminding you that you said so the next time yer going on about me being pigheaded and stubborn."

"How is it you can hear me whisper when I don't want you to, but when I'm yelling at you to help haul in the groceries you are deaf?"

Levon gave him a cheeky grin. "Jus' lucky, I guess."

"Luck has nothing to do with it." Joe asserted with confidence. It was a skill, of that Joe was sure, one his lover honed every chance he got.

Levon laughed softly, pointing a finger at Joe as he sat down at his desk. "Don't think it's any different than when I try ta get you up to help me with the horses."

"That is different," Joe stated.

"How do you figure?" Levon asked, leaning back in his chair.

"Because you always ask when it's the ass crack of dawn."

"You saying you'd be more agreeable if I waited until noon?"

"Hell no." Joe laughed. He enjoyed watching Levon work with the horses, admired the grace and beauty of them, but he didn't have any desire to really be up close and personal with the big animals. And as far as he was concerned muck stalls was best left to someone with more experience.

Levon smirked. "I win."

Joe rolled his eyes. He downed two painkillers with a swallow of lukewarm coffee, grimacing at the taste. He should get a fresh cup, but that would mean going outside and across the street. He didn't feel like going to that effort.

Levon pulled a file out of his inbox. He sighed heavily, trading a look with Joe. They were both heartily tired of paperwork. It would be another week, probably two, before Joe was cleared for more than desk duty. He would have felt guilty about being the reason Levon was riding a desk except that Joe didn't want his partner going anywhere without him.

"You ever think there would be so much paper involved when ya signed up for this job?"

Joe smiled wryly, shaking his head. He hadn't known there was any paperwork involved when he'd decided to become a cop. If he'd known, being a lawyer might have been a more appealing career.

Levon sighed again. "We should invest in paper. God knows people aren't ever going to quit using it."

"Could think of it as job security."

Levon snorted. "That what they calling a pain in the ass these days?"

Joe laughed quietly. "One name anyway."

He pulled a file from his own inbox. His first day back had been the singularly least productive one Joe could remember ever experience. He hadn't gotten anything done but talk to people. Nearly everyone on the force had made a point of stopping by to say hello and get a good look at him. He was damn glad that circus hadn't been repeated.

Joe opened the file, frowning as he read the name. Everything else he'd looked at today had at least rung a bell, but this one didn't sound even vaguely familiar. Levon said he hadn't worked on anything new while Joe had been out on sick leave. His partner wouldn't have lied to him, but it wasn't like Joe to forget a case either.

"You remember Kingston?" Joe asked, hoping Levon could explain.

"Not ours."
"Come again?"

"That one isn't ours." Levon sighed, looking up from the file he'd been studying. "Ya just need ta check that everything the DA needs is in the file. Anything not there, you'll have to bounce it back ta whoever was the lead. Should say who that was on the top somewhere jus' like ours do."

Joe raised an eyebrow. He couldn't remember ever going through another team's paperwork before. "And I'm doing this because?"

"Cause ours were on top and you probably got through 'em all."

Joe rolled his eyes. Levon's answer was good enough in the literal sense but it didn't explain how these files ended up in Joe's inbox. He hated it when Levon would answer the question asked, but not give Joe the information he really wanted. It was like some sort of test.

"And?" He asked impatiently, demanding further details.

"Beaumont wanted ta make sure we had enough ta do so she told the other teams ta pass anything not essential off ta us 'til we're back on the field duty roster."

Joe scowled. Busy work. Not even their busy work. He mentally cursed.

"I hate desk duty."

"Well, it's not forever."

"It will just feel like it."

Levon grimaced. "Always a little ray of sunshine, aren't ya, boy."

Joe hid his smile. Things were definitely back to normal for them at the office--at home too. Levon was sleeping through the night. He no longer flinched away or hesitated to get close to Joe. They were talking more about what had happened...albeit in bits and pieces, but at least they were communicating, and it seemed to be helping.

"Do me a favor, will ya?"

"What?"

Levon handed him a sheet of paper. "Decipher those hieroglyphics."

The sheet that looked like it had been torn from the little notebooks most detectives carried around with them. It wasn't uncommon for original case notes to be included, although most got typed up into something more formal. Joe raised his eyebrows as he stared at the incomprehensible script. "Even my handwriting isn't that bad."

He handed it back. "Who wrote that?"

"Daniels." Levon frowned at the file. "Think it was from when he broke his hand."

That would explain it then. "Pass it back to him." It wasn't like it was their case.

Levon nodded, closing the file, tossing it into his out basket. He picked up his coffee cup, taking a healthy swallow.

Joe grimaced watching him. "I don't know how you can drink that sludge."

"Practice."

Joe looked at his own cooling cup and shook his head. Maybe now would be a good time to marshal the energy to go across the street. A little fresh air and stretching his legs wouldn't hurt. His ass was going numb.

"I'm going to go get a cup of coffee."

"Want company?"

"Nah. Think I can handle it, Cowboy." For a moment, Joe thought Levon might argue, but the blond just nodded slowly.

"Bring me back a cup?"

Joe nodded. "Will do."

He headed for the stairs, preferring to get a little exercise and really stretch out his legs. He managed to stop himself from looking over his shoulder for Levon. It felt decidedly odd for him not to be there.

Joe shook his head. They'd been in each other's back pockets for nearly two weeks. And while Joe didn't really mind, it wasn't normal for them to be constantly within arms length of each other. It would do them both good to spend a little time apart.

Joe checked in with the desk sergeant before heading out. He looked both ways, assessing traffic and then crossed the street. Joe couldn't quite stop himself from looking over his shoulder, eyes glancing upward to the floor he knew Levon was still on.

"Get a grip on yourself, Joey." He muttered to himself. He didn't need to see Levon to know he was all right. And he could get a cup of coffee without having Levon along to hold his hand.

He ordered his favorite flavored latte, getting a tall regular for Levon. Normally Joe ignored the pastry counter, but today he felt like indulging himself. He resolutely refused to think of it as a reward for being able to go somewhere on his own without breaking into a cold sweat.

He bought a bran muffin for himself. It was the only reasonably healthy in the case. And he got a gooey chocolate éclair he knew Levon would appreciate. Joe smiled. Maybe he could use it as a bribe to get Levon to agree to eating something green and leafy at dinner. It wouldn't be the first time Joe had tried to do just that.

Coffee cups safely held within a cardboard carrier and his treats in a bag, Joe headed back. He checked the street twice, and a third time before he crossed. Since his partner had been hit by a car, Joe had become doubly wary of this intersection, almost superstitiously thinking it was the location to blame for Levon being hurt. The drunk driving the car had no idea how lucky he was that Joe hadn't been around to see to his arrest. The man wouldn't have come away unscathed. He might not have come away from the encounter alive.

Joe nodded to the desk sergeant. Normally he'd stop and talk for a few minutes, but he was anxious to get back upstairs. He knew it was irrational to feel uneasy out of sight of his partner, but he couldn't help it.

Joe breathed a sigh of relief when he made it back up to their floor. Glancing around for Levon, Joe wasn't surprised to see him standing near the windows. It was both annoying and reassuring to know Levon had probably watched to make sure he'd gotten to his destination and back safely.

Joe walked over to Levon. "Anything interesting out there?"

"Only thing worth looking at just got a lot closer."

Joe felt his face warm. Levon smiled, lightly bumping Joe's shoulder with his. "Which one o' those is mine?" He pointed at the coffee.

"One on the left."

"Thanks."

"Got you a snack too."

Levon grinned. "You do love me."

"Oh maybe just a little."

Levon laughed. "Gimme."

Joe held the bag out of reach. "Not until you agree to eat something green and leafy with dinner."

"That's extortion."

"Call it what you want." Joe smiled. "Not getting it until I get your word, Cowboy."

"I don't even know what it is." Levon shook his head. "I might be getting the short end of the stick here."

"Trust me, you'll like it."

Levon sighed. "Not fair."

"I don't usually play fair."

"True." Levon chuckled. "One of the things I like about you."

"So...deal?"

"I promise to eat whatever vegetable you make to go with dinner." Levon held up his hand. "Long as it ain't green beans. Hate them damn things and you know it."

"Fair enough." Joe handed him the bag.

Levon looked inside, brown eyes lighting up with delight as took out the treat Joe had gotten. He grinned. "Definitely fair."

"You are so easy."

"You should be grateful for that." Levon bit into his chocolate éclair, handing the bag back to Joe.

Joe pulled out his muffin. It didn't look as good as the éclair he'd gotten for his partner. If they'd been at home, he'd have taken a bite of Levon's. At the office it was better to play it safe and stick with the treat he'd gotten. He ate his muffin and tried to pretend he didn't want something else.

Levon gave him a knowing look. "Shoulda just catered to your sweet tooth and been done with it."

"Shaddup."

Levon grinned, taking another bite of his éclair. Joe looked away, not wanting to see that satisfied, blissful expression he knew his lover would be sporting. It was far too tempting...more so than any confection could ever be. He must have been insane to buy that thing for Levon. He knew better.

"How much longer do we have to be here?"

Levon sipped his coffee. "Could probably leave in an hour and no one would raise any eyebrows."

"And if we didn't care what anyone thought?" Joe asked. It wasn't like they were slackers. They were doing other people's paperwork at this point; it wouldn't matter much if it waited one more day.

Levon shrugged. "Could leave now."

"You want to play hooky?"

"Hell, yes." Levon laughed. "Was thinkin' you'd never ask."

"Why didn't you say something?" Joe glared at him.

"Didn't want you getting pissy."

"Why would I-"

"I know you." Levon shrugged. "You'd have thought I was suggestin' you weren't up to our usual ten hour days."

Joe rolled his eyes but didn't protest. It was a battle he couldn't win. Mostly because he already knew Levon was right.

Levon smirked, taking another bite of his éclair. Joe gave him dirty look before grinning.

"Asshole."

"Yep."

Levon licked the last of the chocolate off his fingers. Joe had to look away. It was wrong on so many levels to find a perfectly innocent action such a turn on. He told himself to never, ever, buy something like that for Levon again unless it was going to be eaten at home.

He cleared his throat. "So you ready to leave now?"

"Ya sure you don't want to stay and work our way through more paper?" Levon smiled, obviously teasing. "Gotta be an entire acre of old growth waiting for us to saw it down."

Joe laughed, imitating his lover's tone and drawl when he answered. "Let's get the hell out of dodge."

Together they headed back to their desks. Joe powered down his computer, ignoring Levon's smirk. His archaic typewriter didn't require any time at all to shut down. He just turned it off.

"One of these days, Cowboy, you are going to have to get with the times."

"You go one day without cursing that thing, and I'll get one."

"I don't curse at it every day."

"Oh yes, you do." Levon smiled, setting his Stetson on his head. "Jus' cause I don't react to all that mumbling under yer breath you do, doesn't mean I don't hear it."

Joe resisted the urge to stick his tongue out. "I ought to make you promise."

"Promise what?" Levon asked as he walked with Joe to the elevator, both of them still carrying their coffee. It was too good to simply leave behind.

"If I can go one day without cursing at my computer you'll get one."

"Has to be a day were here and yer using it." Levon hit the button for the elevator. "Won't count if it's a day we're in the field and ya don't even turn the thing on."

Joe nodded. It wouldn't be fair to count a day when they weren't in the office.

"Cursing in another language still counts as cursing." Levon stepped into the elevator, taking a sip of his coffee.

Joe blinked, following his lover. He hadn't expected Levon to make that condition. It wasn't like his partner would even understand what was being said if he slipped in to Thai.

"Tone is the same even if the words are different." Levon grinned, accurately reading Joe's expression. "What's the matter? Afraid ya can't do it?"

"I can do it."

Levon held out his hand. Joe shook it. He wasn't entirely surprised when Levon pulled him in for a kiss. They'd snuck in several over the past few days whenever they got a moment alone.

Joe sighed, enjoying the flavor of coffee and chocolate in his lover's mouth. He could easily get used to having these moments of intimate connection during the day.

They quickly broke apart when the elevator dinged, and the doors opened. Joe hoped like hell they didn't look guilty or suspicious when a uniform got on. Given the causal greeting they got, he figured they didn't look like they'd been doing anything that might raise eyebrows.

Joe shook his head. As good as it felt, they had to stop taking chances like this. Levon gave him a sheepish, apologetic look. Joe returned it. Levon wasn't the only one to blame; it wasn't like he hadn't been a willing participant.

They stepped off at the garage level. Joe patted Levon's shoulder, squeezing once, wanting to make sure his partner understood Joe didn't blame him. Levon nodded once, giving him a half smile.

"Gonna have ta watch that."

"Yeah," Joe agreed with a sigh. It was better to put a stop to it now...before they got caught. "No more at the office."

"No more," Levon raised two fingers to the brim of his hat.

Joe both loved and hated that they were in agreement. He shook his head. Being sensible sucked.

"Good thing we got no rules at home." Levon grinned brightly, opening the driver side door of the Jimmy.

Joe laughed, getting into the Jimmy. He put his coffee cup in the holder next to Levon's. "Little ray of sunshine aren't you?"

"Don't always have to see the cloud, ya know."

Joe snorted. "Just easier to spot most days."

"True enough." Levon started the Jimmy, backing out of their parking spot. "We got any other rules we should be thinkin' about?"

No hanky panky at the office was the most important one Joe could think of. It wasn't like they had any real issues at work...usually. In another week or so, they'd be off desk duty and things would be back to normal. But with the offer out there, Joe gave the question serious consideration.

He bit his lower lip. Maybe some rules for home wouldn't be a bad idea. They'd already made a few changes in light of what had happened, but they hadn't made any sort of formal agreement.

"You think maybe we could have some rules for home?" Joe asked quietly. It was possible Levon hadn't meant the offer to be quite so open ended.

Levon gave him a quizzical look as he merged with traffic. "Like what?"

Joe pursed his lips. "Well, I know we'd agreed to talk about stuff...but maybe we should set a time and place to do that." They'd gravitating toward talking on the porch swing in the early hours of the morning, more because Joe knew it was a good place and time to get Levon to open up than because of any true agreement.

"You think we need to?"

"I wouldn't mind not having to be up at the crack of dawn to talk to you."

Levon chuckled. "Wuss."

Joe glared at him. "I'm serious, Levon."

"Yeah, I know." Levon sighed. His fingers flexed around the steering wheel. "It's jus'...kind of like us startin' the day together like that."

"I like starting our day together too. But I'd rather not start so early." Joe reached out to take Levon's hand, entwining their fingers. "And I'd rather we did it on purpose rather than just being something accidental."

Joe wasn't going to admit his getting up early to sit on the swing with Levon was deliberate. He knew Levon would feel guilty if he thought Joe had been getting up early simply because it was the only time he could get his lover to open up even a little.

"You want me to wake ya up every day?" Levon gave him a hesitant smile.

Joe squeezed his hand, lips curling upward. "It's almost habit now."

Levon chuckled. "Almost?"

"Would rather stay in bed in cuddle." Joe shrugged. "Can't blame me for that."

"No, can't blame you for that."

"You think maybe we could make a rule about starting a day that way?"

Levon gave him a sly look. "Thinkin' we start every day that way, we won't ever make it ta work on time."

Joe sighed. Levon had a point. Cuddling had a tendency to lead to more..a lot more. He shook his head. "We can cuddle without having sex."

"We can?"

"Yes, we can."

Levon frowned. "Ya sure about that?"

"No," Joe admitted, "but we'll never know if we don't try."

"True." Levon gave him a sly look. "Might have ta start at my usual wake up time...just in case."

"Not be a bad idea." Joe chuckled wryly. At least that way if their cuddling lead to more, they could still get to work on time. "Give us a chance to practice."

"Practice makes perfect."

Joe rolled his eyes. "I've heard that."

"If...ah...if we need ta talk," Levon cleared his throat, "you okay with still doing that on the swing?"

"Definitely." Joe raised Levon's hand to his lips, placing a soft kiss on the knuckles. If that was where Levon felt the most comfortable, Joe wasn't going to deny him that; especially not when just opening up at all was hard enough for him to do. "Whenever and wherever you want, Cowboy."

"Thanks."

It wasn't he sort of thing Joe thought he should be thanked for, but he simply nodded, accepting the gratitude.

"Any other rules you think we should add?"

Levon shook his head. "Not right now, but don't mean something won't come up later."

"Usually does," Joe agreed, "but we'll be able to handle it. Together."

"Together." Levon smiled shyly, squeezing Joe's hand.

So far, there hadn't been anything they couldn't handle. God knows they had plenty of opportunity to test themselves and admittedly things didn't always get dealt with smoothly, but nothing had been impossible for them to deal with. It didn't hurt that both of them were determined to hang on to what they believed to be the best thing in their lives...each other.

Joe sat back in his seat with a soft sigh, closing his eyes. There was still a lot of ground they needed to cover...and really, if they were lucky, that's how it would always be. Their relationship had been evolving for years; Joe fully expected it to continue to do so for a long time to come.

"Wake me when we get home, will you?"

"And here I was thinkin' I'd just leave ya in the Jimmy."

Joe opened his eyes to give his lover an affectionate glare. "Asshole."

"What?" Levon gave him a playfully affronted look. "I'd even crack the window a little."

Joe snorted. "It's a good thing I love you."

"Yeah, it is." Levon grinned. "Love you too."

Joe closed his eyes again, only to open them when Levon told him resting up was a good idea.

"Oh?"

"Plan on making up for us not being able ta do anythin' at the office when we get home." Levon waggled his eyebrows, voice getting husky. "Going to need your stamina, Boy."

Joe's throat suddenly went dry as he imagined just what that might entail. He shook his head. Like he could sleep now. He gave Levon a disgusted look. "You really are an asshole."

"That mean you don't want me ta have my wicked way with you?"

"Hell no." Joe laughed. "That means you should drive faster."

"Thinking we had this conversation before."

"Yeah." Joe grinned. "Liked how it ended the last time."

"Did ya now?"

"I did."

"You looking for a repeat?"

"If you're up for it," Joe licked his lips, feeling his face warming at the obvious pun, "sure."

"Where you're concerned, I'll always be up for it."

"Oh that's just...awful." Joe laughed, amused that Levon had continued with the pun.

"You started it." Levon snickered. "Besides, jus' because it's silly, don't mean it ain't true."

"Then why the hell are you still driving so slow?"

"Good question." Levon deftly maneuvered around a slower vehicle, and floored it.

Joe smiled. His shoulder might not be 100% yet, and things might not be completely back to normal, but they were both well on their way. He couldn't really ask for any more than that. Life was damn good and he intended to enjoy it for as long as possible.

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