Well, things with Stu are fixed . . . I think. My last entry was totally fucked but that was 'cause
I was actually jealous that Stu was taking Trisha to prom. Haha, jealous, yeah that's a laugh, I can
be such a total fuckin' retard sometimes. I didn't know Stu at all when I asked him out, and now I
know a lot more and it sickens me to think I actually went out with him. He's so sexist and overbearing.
He seems to think that he knows me and knows what I want but he so totally doesn't. I wrote him a
note and I was in a good mood when I wrote it and I was being nice and trying to be funny but he
got all pissed off at it. He let Nicki read it and she laughed, she knew what I was doing, what I
was saying because she knows me. And then he tells me if I don't make a decision about what's going
on that it'll be made for me and thenI just got pissed off. I hate it when people who don't know me
try to tell me what to do, drives me up the wall. But whatever. The thing is, I don't know if I
can be friends with him at all, who he really is just drives me crazy. Everything's totally changed.
The ironic thing is, the person who changed me for the better, I can't stand anymore. Tova can't
take her own damn advice, she's so fake it drives me nuts. She seems to think that everything she
does is right. She even told me to do whatever I want, who cares what other people think, I was ready
to freak at her. She's so fake I want to kick her ass and tell her to pull her head out of it. One
day I'm just going to lose it and then she'll find out what I really think of her.
And then there's Isaac, like always. On Friday, I closed and Amanda did too. Apparently he talks
to Amanda A LOT(it's true, I was starting to get REALLY jealous). Amanda says he still likes me(and
how she did it was quite funny, imagine a whole bunch of flailing arms). Jon says that he said he'd
given up on me because I was all over the place. Like, I liked him, then I liked Stu, and blah blah
blah. I want to talk to him, tell him what's going on, but that all comes back to the whole 'not being
able to get a hold of him' thing. Can't phone him at work, don't know when he works(technically I could
find out but no)and you don't call people at work because they're working, and I won't phone him at
home. C'mon his dad is my boss, I phoned his house once already and once was enough. "Hi is Isaac
there?" "No" "OK, thank you, bye" Once I hung up I was ready to have a heart attack and die. Girls
have problems phoning guys, it's normal, but when you work with his entire family, his dad is your
boss, and your friends with one of his sisters, it adds a lot more stress. If Jo picked up the phone,
I'd just hang up, and then there's caller ID. I hate technology.
EVERYTHING IS JUST TOTALLY FUCKED UP!
But yeah, we had a snow day today and I still don't have my math done. Anyways, sleep is good.
March 4, 2002
