Reality is setting in. Death is inevitable. It happens daily. It seems so much worse when it happens to someone you know. Like, a friend of a friend dies. I just don't know what to say in situations like that. I feel bad, this world sucks. I wish I could just protect everyone I know from the shit that always happens.
But then again, who's going to protect me? I need someone to protect me from the shit that I always seem to cause myself.
I didn't start anything with Ron before I left so I wouldn't have to worry about him while I was at camp. Look what that did? Made me fail my course! I didn't want to start anything with Ian in the last couple days of camp because I didn't want it to carry on when I got home. I just didn't want what happened between Tony and I to happen again, that really hurt. But no, my feelings for Ian have carried on to home. And of course they're 10 times worse because I can't see him. I miss him! I miss everyone!
