1. Walk away - It doesn't matter if your right or wrong just walk away. Avoid confrontation because its not worth it. Especially when children are involve. Walk away! I dont mean always walk away. Learn to set and example for your kids. Dont EVER let them see you fight. They need to know that the home they come from is a safe home and daddy is not trying to kill mommy and mommy doesn't mean those things. Trust me nothing is worst than coming from a broken home.
2. Stand up for yourself - I know it contridicts what I just told you but its important that you do. Dont let a marriage be run through a dictatorship. Its a marriage which means two. Not one who is always calling the shots. If your spouse EVER HITS YOU, he/she better run like hell. A person doesn't have the right to hit another human being. No matter who they are they dont have that right. Make sure that your oppinions are heard as well as his. Its about compromise. Once you do that everything will work itself out if you let it.
3. DONT BE THE VICTIM - The worst thing you can do and I see this in women the most. (SORRY) Dont play the victim because its like "Crying Wolf" Dont bring family into this either because that's worst. They will tell you why dont you leave him or you can do better and you think you can and then that's where the arguments start. Its YOUR marriage not your family. I know some culture when you marry one you marry the family. Screw that you have to be independent. Dont cry and think its the end of the world because he decided to leave the toilet seat up. He's a guy they'll do stupid things like that. And its okay that's why you married him.
4. NEVER BRING UP THE PAST -Please no crying and bringing up the past. There is a reason why its in the past. Dont bring it up, if he or she hurt you in the past and now is trying to make amends take it. You need to work it out especially if you have children. If he's been abusive in the past and he's change and I mean really. Not the kind of change that he'll change back to every other week. If you trully believe that he has then give him a chance you married the guy/girl.
5. DONT TREATEN HIM/HER WITH DIVORCE - YOU KNOW YOUR NOT GOING TO DO IT. My father use to tell me that if you marry someone its forever and there is no way around it. So stick with it. You have to realize that marriage takes hard work but in the end its worth it. Every time you try to divorce each other you end up realizing how truly in love you are. You chose the guy/girl they didn't force you. It was your choice.
6. NO SID AND NANCY SYNDROME - Where you love each other one day and she's on her period or he's on something and your trying to kill each other. For those of you who dont know how the story ends, Sid kills Nancy because he loves her. Dont let that be you.
7. Kids come first - If you have children or planning to have them divorce is the worst thing you can do. Half the time and this has been proven scientifically children who come from divorce parents blame themselves. Dont let that child be yours. He doesn't have to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders. He is a kid after all let him be just that.
8. DIVORCE - Let this always be your last resort. Even if you get to this point look at other obtions because there always are some. I dont believe in divorce because I love children and dont believe that they should go through that. I've also seen a lot of people in my life with broken relationships who I feel should divorce because misery loves company. If your making each other miserable its because something your doing wrong. He's a fault and your at fault it takes two. Your not innocent, your the spark and your spouse the full flame. Please work things out for yourself.
9. Love - Love is what brought you together and never forget it. Please never forget it. That's what makes the world a better place. LOVE. As corny as it sounds dont ever lie about what your feeling because you'll only be hurting yourself and your spouse. Its important to know why you fell in love with them. When your angry always remember that. As hard as it may be be the bigger person. Dont scoop dont to some low level Its not worth it. Dont try to get him back by sleeping with his best friend because your using your body to get revenge. You shouldn't do that. Your body is your temple and once you give it to someone like your spouse that's important because he/she's it for you. That's the one dont use yourself. Keep with the one you love as hard as that might be.
10. Marriage - Marriage is a sacred right that bonds two people. No matter of their sex, nacionality, or background. Everyone deserves to be with the one they love. There are other options you can do before you marry. Live with each other see if it really is going to work out. Once you say I do, your together until death do you part. USA has the highest divorce rate in the world and that's because like some people *BRITNEY* Get drunk and marry some yahoo because they thought it was cool. Really consider marriage its important and it should be with someone you truly love. Let it be forever and last forever not some quickie marriage and "Hell when is the next one coming around" Dont be that loser that's been married five times because you think that you've found the ONE. When you found such a person keep looking until your heart tells you its for real and not some lusting desire you want.
THANK YOU FOR TAKING MY MARRIAGE 101 COURSE I HOPE I'VE HELPED YOU IN SOME WAY. PLEASE SIGN THE GUESTBOOK AND IF YOU LIKE TO LEAVE YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS I WOULD LOVE TO FURTHER DISCUSS THIS TOPIC WITH YOU.