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Blond Cowboy - and some think only girls are dumb blondes :-)
Sheriff in a small town walks out in the street and
sees a blond cowboy coming down the walk with
nothing on but his cowboy hat, gun and his boots.
So the sheriff arrests him for indecent exposure.
As he is locking him up he asks "Why in the world are you dressed like this?"
Cowboy.... " Well it's like this Sheriff... I was in the bar down the road and this pretty little red head asks me to go out to her motor home with her....and I did.
We go inside and she pulls off her top and asks me to pull off my shirt,.. so I did....
Then she pulls off her skirt and asks me to pull off my pants.. so I did...
Then she pulls off her panties and asks me to pull off my shorts... So I did...
Then she gets on the bed and looks at me kind of funny and says, "Go to town cowboy....".
"So here I am."
It's In The Stars
The Lone Ranger and Tonto are camping in the desert, set up their tent, and are asleep. Some hours later, The Lone Ranger wakes his faithful friend.
"Tonto, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
Tonto replies, "Me see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?" ask The Lone Ranger.
Tonto ponders for a minute.
"Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What it tell you, Kemo Sabi?"
The Lone Ranger is silent for a moment, then speaks. "Tonto, you Dumby, someone has stolen our tent."
PLEASE READ THIS, IT'S IMPORTANT NEWS TO ALL GUYS THAT GO OUT TO CLUBS OR BARS
Men, be more alert and cautious when getting a drink offer from a girl.
Good girls out there, please forward this message to your guy friends.
There is a new drug that is in liquid form. The drug is now being used by female sexual predators at parties to induce their male victims to have sex with them. The shocking news is the drug is available virtually anywhere! It goes by the street name "Beer." All girls have to do is buy a "Beer" or two for almost any guy and then simply ask the guy home for no-strings-attached sex. Men are rendered literally helpless against such tactics. Please! Forward this to everyone you know...
The NEW Survivor Game
Have you heard about the next planned "Survivor" show? {I know you ladies out there will have a good laugh out of this, only wish they would do the show}
* 6 men will be dropped on an island with 1 van and 4 kids each, for 6 weeks
* Each kid plays two sports and either takes music or dance classes
* There is no access to fast food.
* Each man must take care of his 4 kids, keep his assigned house clean, correct all homework, complete science projects, cook, do laundry, etc.
* The men only have access to television when the kids are asleep and all chores are done: There is only one TV between them and there is no remote.
* The men must shave their legs and wear makeup daily, which they must apply themselves either while driving or while making four lunches.
* They must attend weekly PTA meetings; clean up after their sick children at 3:00 a.m; make an Indian hut model with six toothpicks, a tortilla and one marker; and get a 4 year old to eat a serving of peas.
* The kids vote them off based on performance.
* The winner gets to go back to his job. | 
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