School Jokes 1 Teacher: When you yawn, your supposed to put your hand to your mouth! Pupil: What? And get bitten! Teacher: You aren't paying attention to me. Are you having trouble hearing? Pupil: No, teacher I'm having trouble listening! Teacher: Class, we will have only half a day of school this morning. Class: Hooray Teacher: We will have the other half this afternoon! Father: I hear you skipped school to play football Son: No I didn't, and I have the fish to prove it! Pupil (on phone): My son has a bad cold and won't be able to come to school today. School Secretary: Who is this? Pupil: This is my father speaking! Father: How do you like going to school? Son: The going bit is fine, and so is the coming home bit too, but I'm not too keen on the time in- between Why are the teachers eyes crossed? Because she can't control her pupils! Teacher: Today we are learning the word "alligator." Jimmy can you tell me a sentence with that word. Jimmy: Well...my not so nice Aunt Meme was aten by an alligator.... and im glad'e'ate'er (glad he ate her!) Teacher: Jimmy I hope I did not see u pulling faces. U know I once did the same thing & my teacher told me that if I kept pulling faces my face would stay like that. Jimmy: I see u did not listen! Jenny came home from school one day. Her father asked what did you do today. She said writing. Her father asked what did you write. Jenny said. I don't know she didn't teach us reading yet!! Little jimmy came home from his first day at school and told his mother he was never going back.. What the use of school? "He said I cant read an I cant write an the teacher want let me talk! Teacher: If you had 5 lollies & the boy next to you took three, what would you have? Pupil: a fight, Miss! Jimmy: what�s green purple and grey? Kim: I don't know what? Jimmy: I don't know either but they're serving it in the school cafeteria! Back to Jokes Back to Home Page |