Chapter 7
Victor�s POV: I pulled Shae-Lynn close to my body and held her trembling body tight. Shae liked to pretend that nothing fazed her and nothing bothered her but it was clear to me that she was cold and scared. She�s been headstrong and stubborn for as long as I�ve known her, though. When we first paired up, she was actually weaker at twizzles than I was. She would trip over and over when our coach requested that we do double and triple twizzles. When I say trip, I actually mean fall face first, into the cut up ice�not just stumble. She would always force a smile on her face and get up as quickly as possible. She never wanted us to think she couldn�t handle the demands of practice. There were so many times she would be fighting back tears as she quickly scrambled to her feet but she never broke down in front of me. I actually never saw her cry over pain or skating until that one time� -Flashback- (Author�s Note: I don�t know how 100% accurate this is but I figured it would be a good story) 1996 World Championships Shae-Lynn sat quietly on a folding chair back stage as I did what I normally did before a big competition�paced. I couldn�t focus, however. All I could think of was how Shae was�. -Earlier that week- I skated by her and squeezed her shoulders playfully. �Great practice, huh Shae?� She grinned broadly and smiled. �So far, so good,� She agreed. I looked around and saw a group of people milling into the stands. We were used to this. Ever since worlds years back, people had been coming to our practices, just to see the hydroblading. It was almost an expected thing now. I extended my hand. �You want to show em some of our moooves?� I asked winking. She rolled her eyes and took my hand. �You�re such a loser, Vic,� She said with a laugh. We decided to practice the end section of our current free dance. Picking up speed, we flew into our last section of footwork. We began to approach our last section where we did high kicks into our ending position. Shae kicked her leg higher into the air than usual, which sent me on an extreme outside edge. Feeling out of control, I tried to pull us in so that we didn�t topple over. Unfortunately, the quick pull in caused Shae to loose her balance. Watching the whole thing in slow motion, I saw my blade fly up out of control into the air and land swiftly into her knee. �Shae?� I asked quietly, just to her so as not to attract attention to ourselves. She�s probably be furious that people saw us mess up like that. She was probably furious with me. Expecting to see frustration in her eyes, I was shocked to see her eyes fill up with tears. Blinking rapidly, she managed to keep them from not spilling over her eyelids. I glanced down and saw that my blade cut deeply into her knee. A Blood was beginning to seep into her tights and down her leg. It was obvious that she got hurt. �Oh god, Shae,� I said, moving quickly to help her up. She put all of her pressure on me and allowed me to support her and help her off the ice. �It�s no big deal,� She asked, trying to control her quivering voice. I shook my head furiously, as we reached the exit of the rink. �No it is a big deal,� I said, feeling furious at myself for letting anything happen to her, yet knowing full well this happens in our sport. �This is my fault,� She shook her head furiously at the comment and allowed me to help her to sit down. Our coach, Uschi rushed over with a Canadian Team doctor and the team manager. They took over from there. Determining that the cut was too deep, Shae had to go to the hospital and get stiches. While many didn�t think that was much of a big deal, an ice dancer knew how difficult it could be to try to skate with stitches in your knee. With the deep edges and bending we did, plus hydroblading, it could be incredibly difficult to skate up to par. Worst of all, we all knew how painful it would be for Shae to skate that Freedance the next day. We all tried convincing Shae-Lynn to allow us to withdraw but she would have no part of it. �We�re a team, ok Vic,� She said stubbornly, looking me square in the eye. �Exactly,� I said, staring right back. �And that�s exactly why I don�t want to put you through more pain. It�s ok�� �No,� She said forcefully. �Victor, I can do this. It�s four minutes and six seconds. That�s not so bad,� I looked at her pointedly to let her know I wasn�t believing her little speech. �Victor,� She said softly. �I need to do this and I know I can. If the swelling goes up and if it looks bad, I won�t do it. But give it a chance ok. If it�s looking somewhat normal tomorrow�I�m skating. Case closed,� And with that, she walked away. -Current time- So here we were, backstage, ready for compete our Freedance. The doctors and even Uschi had okayed Shae�s knee saying it looked about as good as it would look. Shae wasn�t complaining about any pain but I could see her wince every once and awhile when she tried to bend it. I wasn�t about to say anything, however. I knew that determined look in her eye and there was no point arguing with her at this point. She had made up her mind. Walking over to her, I offered her my hand and pulled her to her feet. �You feeling ok?� I asked her quietly, as we approached the ice. She smiled and nodded tensely. �I�ll be ok, Victor. I can make it through this,� . She smoothed her bright pink dress, carefully, making sure that she looked perfect. This was usually something I kidded her about but at this point, I was too nervous to do anything. I helped her take her guards off so that she wouldn�t have to bend any more than necessary and then we got onto the ice. We slowly got into our beginning pose and waited for the music to begin. That day we skated the program the best we have ever skated it. It was flawless�it was fast, graceful and edgy. Shae�s smile never wavered, she went into every move with confidence and anyone who didn�t know what had happened the day before would have never guessed she was injured. She amazed me. Hoping and leaping into our final elements, it was clear to me that she was using all of her energy, just trying to get those last few elements perfect. The music ended quickly and she threw herself into my arms so we could go into our ending position. I felt her entire body drop, obviously exhausted. The crowd rose to their feet and began cheering. I glanced down and saw a small smile on Shae�s face as she struggled to catch her breath. Although there was a pleased smile on her face, her eyes began to well up with tears. Her eyes met mine and finally, after all that time, she allowed herself to cry. Her face crumpled and she broke down, clearly feeling the pain of her over-exerted knee. Leaning down, I took her gently in my arms and lifted her, to a standing position. She hugged me and buried her face into my shoulder as she cried. �It hurts so bad,� She said laughing through her tears. �I know,� I said, smoothing her hair gently. �Thank you, Shae-Lynn,� I said so only she could hear. She pulled away from me and smiled, her eyes glistening with fresh tears. �I hope you know you're carrying me to my room tonight,�. I laughed as we skated carefully to center ice to take our bows. �Ok,� I said, smiling at the audience. She gritted her teeth and forced a smile on her face. �And you�ll be getting me ice cream, too�Ben& Jerry�s,� Laughing, I shook my head. She was going to be fine. -End Flashback- As I felt her snuggled tightly in my arms, I began to think. I really don�t think I�ve ever really loved anyone�.until now. Comparing the feelings that I have had in the past to the feelings I was feeling now, they didn�t seem to come close to adding up. The only thing that mattered to me at that moment was keeping Shae calm, Shae comfortable, and Shae safe. I didn�t once think about myself and I knew that regardless of my �nice guy� personality, with anyone else, I would be thinking of how to save myself and that was it. Impulsively, I leaned down and kissed the top of her head gently. As I pulled away, my mind began to race. What if she got upset? What is she was angry at me and thought I was just this because she was vulnerable? I was relieved to see her look up and smile sleepily at me. �Oh no, don�t go to sleep, Shae,� I said shaking her body gently. She laughed and looked at me like I was crazy. �Why? In case you have forgotten, I have been up for over 24 hours,� I shook my head seriously. �No, Shae. Really. You can�t fall asleep. If you fall asleep, the chances of you catching hypothermia is greater. I can�t risk that. You�re going to have to fight to stay awake,� She stifled a yawn and sat up. �Well, lying down will just make me sleepy. How are we going to stay awake? I�m really tired, Vic,� I stifled a yawn. �I am too,� I confessed. �Listen, we�re just going to have to talk, to make each other laugh or something in order to stay alert. I don�t think we should get up and move around too much. It could take too much energy,� Shae-Lynn�s POV: I looked at him quizzically. �Ok�your idea�you decide what we talk about. I can�t think of anything,� He laughed. �Thanks for giving me such an easy job,� I shrugged. �No problem,� He rolled his eyes and then looked off into the distance. �What are you doing?� �Shhhhh, I�m pondering,� I laughed. Vic is the only person I know that uses such proper words. I paused. �Vic?� He turned to look at me. �Hmmm?� �Well,� I began thoughtfully. �Do you ever wonder why things work out the way they do? Like�ok, there�s the good stuff like us finding each other and pairing up,� Victor smiled warmly. �Yeah,� �Then, there�s all that other stuff like judging�and injuries�and all those messed up relationships,�. I turned to face him. �I mean, do you ever wonder why we both can�t just find someone and be happy? I know we�re busy so much but I think we�re pretty good people,� He looked somewhat puzzled. �Um�care to elaborate a little more, Shae?� I smiled and hit him playfully on the arm. �What I mean is�well�� I paused, trying to find the best way to say what I was going to say. �Go on,� He said laughing at the probably blank expression on my face. �Where did we find such losers?� I blurted out. He burst out laughing. I looked at him bewildered. �Victor, I�m being serious,� He paused and tried to stop laughing. �Oh�ok,� He managed to sputter out, his face turning red from trying to contain the laugher. He started laughing again. �Vic, really,� I said moving over to sit across from him Indian style. �Think about it�Ok, there was Steven. I really thought he was perfect for me. I mean, he was suave, handsome, funny, talented�.and he turned out to be such a horrible person to me. Then there was Nikolai who was smart, handsome, once again suave, talented, and again�nothing. And, now that I think back on it, I considered all of those �my type�,�. He nodded, beginning to understand what I was saying. He remained silent, however. �Come on, aren�t you going to fess up and talk about your failed relationships too?� I asked, reaching over to tap his knee. �I know what you mean, Shae,� He said rather quietly. �Look at me and Maiiki. I proposed to her but you know what? I think I just did it because I felt it was the next step. The truth was�I don�t think we were ever �truly� in love,� I looked at him confused. He must have caught on to my confusion because he continued. �What I mean is�� he paused, trying to think of the best words to say. He leaned forward and continued. �You know that feeling you get when you are completely in love?� �Mmmhmmm,� I mumbled, allowing myself to gaze deep into his blue eyes. If only he knew� He didn�t seem to notice me going into that trance-like state and continued. �Well�Maiiki and I never really had that. I mean, sure we loved each other but we were never in that �you�re all I can think of, all I want is to be with you,� stage. It wasn�t real, romantic love to me,�. He paused, sitting silently. I decided to break the ice. �Yeah,� I said pretending to be casual. �Then there was that crazy girl you went out with near the beginning of our partnership,� His face broke into a grin. �She was not crazy�.she was just had an overly bubbly personality,� I burst out laughing. �That�s a nice way to put it,� �Andrea was always really nice to you. It seemed as though you were the only one with the problem with her�� I felt my face flush red. I would never admit to him that he was my first big crush. It was just a harmless little crush�one any teenage girl would have on an older man she admired. It wasn�t anything romantic at all. The feelings I felt then were nothing compared to the feelings I had for him now, that�s for sure. But it seemed as though his new girlfriends always brought out the competitive side of me�. -Flashback- 1991 After grabbing a quick sip of water, Vic took my hand and we began stroking around the rink. Practice for the day was almost over and our coach wanted to spend time at the end of every practice doing simpler things such as stroking. She felt that if we mastered it then, it would be flawless by the time we began to compete. In a new partnership, you can�t let the simple things slide. Suddenly, I heard applause in the bleachers. There was usually no one in the rink with us so I looked up, startled. Sitting in the bleachers, cheering like a crazy person was a woman I had never seen before. She had wild looking curly red hair and a big smile on her face. She looked to be slightly short and stocky with a curvy figure. Not only this, she was wearing a brightly colored bulky sweater with black stirrup pants. I knew after seeing this crazy looking woman, I knew I�d never forget that image as long as I lived. �Who is that?� I asked Victor in a hushed voice. He seemed unfazed by the scene she was causing. �Oh, that�s just a woman I�m starting to see, Andrea,� He took my hand and led me off the ice. �Come on, I�ll introduce you,� �Vic, really�I don�t want to�� Too late, she already began running frantically over to us. �Wow, you guys were soooo good!� She exclaimed in the most annoying voice I had ever heard. �I can�t believe you can balance on those�those ummm�� �Blades?� I volunteered, feeling frustrated with her already. �Yeah!� She exclaimed to me. She suddenly turned her attention to Victor. �Hey baby�you ready to go?� She purred. She wrapped her cubby arms around his waist and attached herself to his side. He looked slightly uncomfortable. The whole scene made me sick. Victor was the only older guy who paid attention to me and, being young, that made him really appealing to me. Seeing this girl being so possessive with him really was a shock to me. �Ummm, Andrea�this is Shae-Lynn, my partner,� I forced a smile on my face as she turned to me, her face grinning widely at me. �Well, hello there,� she said, suddenly speaking slower, yet higher and more squeaky than before. �It�s very nice to meet you Shae-Lynn. How old are you now?� I almost fell over. She was talking to me like I was three years old! I decided to play along. �I�m fifteen years old now. My Mommy lets me come to the rink and skate with Victor here all by myself! I really am a big girl, huh?� Victor stifled some laughter. Andrea looked at us bewildered. Suddenly, it seemed as if she realized that I was making fun of her. Her face looked furious. �Come on, Victor,� She said grabbing his arm and trying to yank him out of the rink. �Let�s go,�. He nodded. �Um, I�ll see you tomorrow, Shae,� He said as she wrapped her arms around him possessively and led him out of the rink. I stood there in silence and alone for a few minutes watching him go. I knew at the time it was just a silly crush and it was no big deal but it still hurt to watch him leave with her. Lucky for me, he broke up with her a few days later. I don�t think any of us could have put up with her any longer. -End Flashback- �Remember�remember what she was wearing that day?� Victor choked out in between fits of laughter. Leaning forward and resting my hands on his knees, I was in hysterics. �Even in that time period, that wasn�t fashionable!� I put my hands on my stomach and cringed slightly, while laughing. �Oh god, all this laughing is killing my stomach!� �You know, if I didn�t know any better, I would have said you were jealous of Andrea,� He said, nudging me with his foot playfully. I was positive my face turned a shade of red unnatural to humans. �No, I wasn't�� I said softly�a little too softly. He knew right away. �You were, huh?� I hit his knee lightly. �Stop it. I was fifteen and you were the only male I saw besides my father and Chris. What did I know?� I asked. He smiled and nodded. We sat silently, our laughter quieting and looked at each other. Victor was the first to break the silence. �Maybe we have been going about it all wrong,� �What do you mean?� �Well�we just agreed that going after what we believed to be �our type�, we weren�t happy. Do you think we should look somewhere else?� He looked at me in a funny way. A way I never really have seen him look at me personally before. It filled me with a feeling I had never felt, especially with Victor, before. I felt the sudden urge to run away but with the snow and being alone, I decided against it. Instead, I looked back into his eyes and felt a sudden calmness rush over my body. Subconsciously, I moved closer to him so our knees were touching slightly. I rested my hands once again on them. �I don�t know�� I said quietly glancing down at the ground. Sensing his presence growing closer and closer to me, I looked up. He face was so close to mine now. �What do you think?�. I subtly moved my face closer to his, my hair falling into my face as it always does. He reached over and pushed my hair back behind my ears, delicately brushing his hand against my face. �I don�t know either�� he said, his face moving closer still. His lips seemed so close, yet so desperately far away. I could feel the faint warmth of his breath on my lips. �Shae�� �Victor��
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