Sunbathed Thoughts....

This is just something I wanted to do -- It's not very good, but I still wanted to put some of my poetry up on my sight. I hope you enjoy it... but I write to express myself, not please you. By the way, the midi playing, is "Lost In The Darkness" from Jekyll & Hyde

Forbidden smiles,
Across the miles.
Forbidden calls,
From empty halls.
Forbidden dreams --
Too hard it seems.
A forbidden tear,
Cause I want you here.
I didn't choose to live life this way!
Now - Even I'm not sure what to say.
How can friendship be forbidden?
Why must something BEAUTIFUL be hidden?
Dreams now shattered.
Memories now destroyed.
Now inside my heart -
An empty void.

Someday I will live for the today --
And not have to pine for yesterday.
Someday I will wake up with a smile on my face -
Not having to feel like such a disgrace.
Someday I will learn to laugh again --
Things will be better then.
Someday I wont have to wonder why ...
And then, I'll have no reason to cry.
Someday the world will be mine --
Everything will be okay, everything will be fine..
Someday I'll be who I'm meant to be --
Just you wait, just you see.
Someday all my wrongs will be forgiven,
And my life will be worth livin'.
Someday I'll prove them all wrong...
Someday I'll be whistling a song.
Someday I will find the love I need,
Someday I'll finally be freed.

I'm sorry for the things I've done...
I'm sorry for not being #1.
I'm sorry for the pain & the tears....
I'm sorry I wont get to see you through years.
I'm sorry for the fights I started ....
Weeks after we had parted.
I'm sorry for the things I said --
If THEY want to hate me.... let them go ahead....
I'm sorry for the way I tried...
I'm sorry that I went ahead and cried...
I'm sorry for the way I dread,
About everything that lies ahead.
I'm sorry I ruined things for us ...
But I'm NOT sorry we didn't end it on the bus...
I hate the fact that I will still cry...
I hate that I probably wont see you until after I die.
But most of all...
I hate the fact that no matter what I say -
'I'm sorry' is STILL not enough to this day.
What do you want me to do?
I still want to be your friend through and through....
But it will NEVER be enough....
Why does life always have to be so tough?
We can't always win....
We can't always go back and begin....
We have all sinned...
And yet I stand unforgiven.

The stars will always sparkle,
The sun will always shine...
But dreams can't last forever --
I know NOW that you can never be mine.
I'll forever remember your eyes,
How they sparkled in the moonlight.
I'll always remember your smile ...
And how with you it always felt RIGHT.
It'll be hard to forget the touch of your skin,
Or the smell of your hair --
But at least if I keep you in my heart,
I know you'll always be there.
So when our days are over,
And the memory of us fades away --
Know that I love you.
And in my heart -- together we'll stay.

Rain keeps falling from the sky,
And yet I lack the tears to cry.
Hope keeps pouring from above -
Yet I have lost my faith in love.
See if love had kept you near ...
Then wouldn't you still be here?
And although my lungs are still full of air -
My heart is empty, alone and bare.
Days have turned into weeks ...
And still silence alone speaks.
Today I've finally given up hope -
Tomorrow I'll begin to cope.
Someday my heart will again beat strong!
THEN I'll sing a happier song...
But for now no tears will I cry.
And rain will keep falling from the sky.

Silence fills the air around ...
Am I lost or am I found?
Days have turned into weeks -
It's been forever since I've heard you speak.
Have you forgotten me so soon ...
I still remember that night under the moon.
Has your mother won the game?
Will things ever be the same?
Have you already given up hope?
Or have you just learned how to cope....
This hidden friendship I thought we held dear.
But I'm just standing all alone here.