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The (fake) moon landing |
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Could this be the biggest consipracy of all time? I've always been in doubt about the moon landing. For those of you who dont know, theres a ton of evidence that shows that the moon landing back in the 60s was fake. Some say the old yanks actually filmed the whole thing in a recording studio area 51 then broadcasted it as "live" telly. Why would they do such a thing? Well, yanks and our hairy friends, the russians, were racing to get their men on the moon. So with america faking the landing, everyone was fooled that america has won the race. Its quite possible as America has become an increasingly corrupt country, govenment wise. Tits like Patrick Moore (that famous astrology bloke) says that for every piece of evidence against the moon landing, there is always something that proves it wrong. He may be right - but me, being the biased little knob that I always am, will show you evidence thats definatly true, no questions about it. Have you ever tried to read this sort of stuff about the moon before? Its way too confusing, so I've got the most interesting evidence from the internet, dumbed it down a notch and added the odd bit of swearing and humour. |
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Why do I care so mch about the moon? Becuase it is the planet for my star sign - cancer. Thats my reason. Honestly. |
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| EVIDENCE ONE: SHADOWS |
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| Anyway - the first piece of evidence. Look at the picture before I waffle of about it. |
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Ya got what the problem is here? No? Look at the bleeding shadows!! Now, excuse me if Im wrong (which is unlikely) but our solar system only has one sun, doesn't it? Correct. So how the hell can two people standing so closely to each other have wonky shadows? And sure if there was two light sources, surely each man would have 2 shodows? Bugger me, sunshine. Well, old Patrick Moore has defence for old Nasa ready. He reckons that different altitdudes in the space where the two gimps are standing can effect the way the shadows look on the landscape. One of the men could be standing on a hill or one could be on the edge of a crater and the camera couldnt pick that up, only the shadows difference. The statement might work, but I dont believe it in this case sorry, patty M. Next case... |
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EVIDENCE TWO: STARS |
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This ones a good point. The old lads at Nasa were afraid they may have bollocked this one up a bit.. |
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Hmm i'm going to start explaining the pictures before showing the to you. I bet you didnt even notice anything wrong with that photo, did you? Go back and look for stars. See there are none. Surely in space you can see stars? Well the logic behind this that the old lads at NASA were afriad that they may bollock up the constillations. For example, it would be difficult to work out the correct order in which the stars appear in the sky. Hawk eyed boffins would see that the stars were in wrong order thus pissing on NASA's chips. So simply stars weren't put in the sky, when filmed in the recording studio. Patty moores quick to cover for this one. He makes a fair point that not every night on earth you can see the stars, even when its not cloudy. However, on cloudless nights and we cannot see stars, that has stuff to do with out atmosphere which a moon doesn't have. So if a moon doesnt have an atmosphere like ours then Patrick thoery gets put on the bonfire. |
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EVIDENCE THREE: CAMERA LIGHTS |
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Right I will explain this next one before you look at the picture. It pretty simple to get your head around. If recorded in a studio then bright studio recording lights would be all in your face. And with our yankee "spacemen" helmets being so shiney, they would reflect the camera lights. Okay, I think the moon landing is fake but even this evidence is just so wank. Has anyone just thought it could be the sun? Duh?!? |
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Then agian, it does look a little dodgy. (I mean the go-faster stripe on his head) |
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EVIDENCE FOUR: NO DUST |
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So here are 3 (or so) bufty spacemen in their powerful space rocket when they land. With the spacecraft being so powerful, surely the dust on the moon where they landed would leave some sort of imprint, with the thrusters and such..? Well not according to this photograph: |
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Okay, the photo is a little shitty but basically its the arse end of a rocket facing a dusty moon floor. With these power rocket boosters, sure some sort of force would blast the shit away..? Well bugger me, that aint whats happening here. This is what mr. moore has to say (Just so you know I didnt type this, this was patrick's official statement): "The truth here is once again very straight forward. At all of the landing sites, the astronauts found that the Lunar surface had about a two inch layer of dust. Below that was pretty much hard pan. As you can see from Apollo 11, not only is the upper layer of dust blown away in a radial pattern, as if from a thruster? And there is also a small depression below the nozzle. Since the LM descent engine only made about 3,000 pounds of thrust (compared to a modern jet fighter which makes between 18,000 and 22,000 pounds of thrust), this is pretty much as any engineer or geologist would expect things to look." Due to the fact he couldnt explain himself simply, he loses this round. |
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EVIDENCE FIVE: HIPPIES |
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Okay you may not be satisfied from the evidence so far. Okay how about the entire event took place in the 60s? Think about that. Two reason why that couldnt happen. The technology is, by todays standards, forty years old. We havent advanced much considering in the area of space travel considering the forty years age gap. People doubt that landing on the moon was impossible due to technology in those days. Getting into space was hard enough without getting on the moon. |
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Also, rumours go that neil armstrong was a hippie and got too stoned when it was his turn to go onto the moon so the mission got aborted. Imagine hippies watching the moon landing... They would all be paranoid from their recent stoner session so would have thought the moon landing was a dream. Yeah fuck you hippies and your stupid idea to beat the hairy russians to the moon. |
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Theres still more evdience like radiation and fake rocks but thats boring. |
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So the race is still on boys. First country to the moon wins. And the yanks get disqualified for being cheating bastards. |
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Informed? Refreshed? Good. Lets get our asses back to the homepage!. |
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Malformed? Exhusted? Read more K-mails! |
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