 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
|
|
 |
|
|
|
 |
|
|
Incase your dumb ass hasn't already noticed, this is a webpage all about what I have to say, so why not do a page on how ace I am and how the world revolves around me? Its pretty cool, I can assure you. |
|
|
|
|
|
On this page, you can see some interesting things about me and whatever I could be arsed writing about at the time. |
|
|
|
|
|
Things I could never put onto a C.V.: |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Lets face it, you've been writing a C.V. and it asks you what you do in your spare time (or something along the lines). You can never put the things you do that aren't normal or legal onto a C.V. due to the fact the employers may think you're a cunt. But seeing as this is my webpage, I might as well take this opportunity - I just hope none of my employers ever find this...!
- Have been an extra on hollyoaks...honestly! (Not that it matters 'cos hollyoaks is crap)
- Got my dog stoned. Hours of humour followed (Didnt really if you are from the RSPCA)
- A running contender for Miss Cheshire has tasted my man-gravy
- Paraglided with a stranger
- Noticed that my sister's mate Sarah looks like the bass player out of 'the coral'.
- Ate 3 cream crackers in one minute
- Set my testicles on fire
- Found a pratical use for a "Busted" cd
- Broke my toe by kicking a chiar at RHM
- The KKK took my baby away
- Sucked a strippers tits infront of me nan
- Won the 'sonic the hedgehog europian tour championship' when I was 10
- Made my lip go fat by poking it with hay (allergic reaction)
- Realise that I could impersonate my dad if I can attach a dead mouse under my nose
- Designed the cd covers and produced the 'mottley crewe chooser' series.. click here to see them.
- Learned to write in HTML for the sake of my webpage! |
|
|
|
Some things I would like to try:
Because I can't be fun loving all the time, I'm missing out on the following activities. If you can make any of them come true for me, I would reward you with something of equal value to yourself:
- Jet-ski naked
- Meet two drunken lesbians
- Eat cheese until i suffer diarrhoea
- Give a tramp an acid bath
- Wrestle an octopus
- Make a decent web-page
- Climb the really tall tree across the road from my house
- Close a door when somebody behind me is carrying lots of stuff
- Leave a poo on Craig Harrision's doorstep |
|
|
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Back in my high-school days, I used to hate writing, well, who didn't? However, the hormones seem to have not only ravaged my body but my brains too! Now it seems that I love to write whenever possible: be it a subway wall, in an e-mail or to a magazine. I wrote to Kerrang! once and actually got a letter in. Sadly, I lost that Kerrang! but I have made up for it by my true story that got published in FHM (look right dick face). I won a �100 toy tank which I was well chuffed about - it could fire pellets and make you bleed. Until Sean broke it. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Seeing as I'm a very uninteresting person, I seemed to have run out of stuff to put about me. I may put some more stuff up here in the near future, but the likes of you probably don't care. If you have any ideas - you know which way to send them [email protected]
The homepage wants you back: click here! |
|
|
|
|