A/N: I promised to write more Demon Diary fics when the inspiration hit me, and here it is! Not exactly worthy of being called a fic, since it's so incredibly plot-less, but still, it's better than nothing, hopefully!
Prepare for the return of Eclipse's schizophrenia. Mwahah.
Vanilla Ice Cream
/He's definitely doing it on purpose./ The 'voice' told Eclipse, who was inclined to disagree with his insanity, as per usual. These arguments with himself were slightly worrying...
'He's too innocent to be doing that on purpose.' Eclipse insisted.
/Who do you think you're trying to fool? Nobody can 'accidentally' be *that* sexy. Jump him!!/ The voice ordered, cackling. Eclipse rubbed his temples and attempted to will it away, which never worked, but at least made him feel as though he was making an effort. The fact was, Raenef, demon lord of the castle with no name, was eating an ice cream cone. A *vanilla* ice cream cone. Eclipse wasn't sure why, but somehow that made it worse.
/Jump him, jump him, jump him!!/ The inner voice chanted annoyingly.
Eclipse twitched, getting strange looks from Erutis, Chris and Krayon, who were also sitting around in the castle gardens aimlessly eating ice cream cones. Nobody was quite sure what Krayon was doing there, but the curly haired demon lord looked so utterly ridiculous eating a strawberry ice cream that nobody felt the urge to bother asking. Erutis even seemed to be tolerating his presence for once, smirking for no particular reason as she licked at her chocolate ice cream. Krayon was watching her eat it in much the same way Eclipse was watching Raenef, and the raven haired demon wondered briefly if Krayon suffered the indignity of having voices in his head, too. Knowing Krayon for as long as he had, Eclipse suspected that Krayon had more than one voice in his head. Not that he would dare imply that an elder demon was insane, mind. Smirk.
Chris, the last of their happy little group of cooperating mortal enemies, was completely absorbed in the consumption of his pistachio ice cream, trying to eat it before the evening sun melted it into sticky green slime all over his hand.
/*Why* haven't you jumped him yet? *Why*??/ The inner voice wailed, sounding highly pained by the fact that Eclipse was not molesting his charge.
'I refuse to dignify that remark with an answer.' Eclipse told it, staring down at his rum and raisin ice cream with a slightly blank expression. With all the highly *wrong* thoughts coursing through his mind, he doubted he'd be able to eat the thing without getting a few hundred unwholesome mental images he really didn't need. Krayon seemed to be in the same situation, though the predicament didn't seem to bother him. Eclipse was jealous.
/Go on, you know you want to.../ The voice leered.
'Get *out* of my head before I *destroy* you.' Eclipse growled in a variety of tones, not quite sure why his voice (in his head) had suddenly become so messed up.
/Ooo, scary. How are you going to destroy me, then?/ It asked, laughing at him. Eclipse scowled at his ice cream, deciding that he hated everything. Except Raenef. Raenef was pretty...
/You have it soooo bad./ The voice grinned at him.
'I will find a way to kill you, even if it means attending years of therapy.' Eclipse threatened. The voice just gave another manic giggle and pointed out the fact that his ice cream was now melting all over his hand. Eclipse growled, but just continued to glare at the melting treat, causing it to melt even faster.
/Hey, I have a present for you!/ The voice suddenly piped up, causing Eclipse to twitch as he was assaulted with some very explicit images of Raenef in a variety of provocative poses, lacking anything in the way of clothing. Eclipse gave a choked little squeak and stared at his ice cream with slightly wide eyes, a very un-demon-like blush tinging his white cheeks.
'Stopitstopitstopit!!!'
* * *
Raenef blinked up at Eclipse, wondering if it was safe to poke him, because his teacher seemed to be in some sort of daze as he stared down at the melting ice cream in his hand, his eyes a little wide. Raenef wondered what was wrong. Perhaps he was upset because the ice cream was melting all over him?
"Eclipse?" Raenef tried, getting no response other than a twitch.
"He's having a psychotic episode, don't worry about it." Krayon offered, smirking as he licked at his pink ice cream. "His ice cream is melting, though. You'd better lick it up before it goes all over him."
Erutis, silently worshipping her chocolate dessert, was actually quite impressed by Krayon's wickedness. Chris, on the other hand, just rolled his eyes and snorted, getting back to the important things in life, namely pistachio flavoured ice cream.
"Uh... Are you sure? Won't he be angry with me if I do that?" Raenef asked in a quietly unsure voice, watching a drip make its way down his teacher's hand, ready to fall onto Eclipse's black shirt.
"I should think he'd be grateful to you for helping him." Krayon shrugged, putting on an uncaring face but noting that Erutis looked ready to applaud his sheer evilness. Ah, so he was finally getting somewhere with her? That made him feel fuzzy inside, something that disturbed him a little but he decided he could live with. Mmm, strawberries.
Raenef watched the drip of rum and raisin ice cream sceptically, finally deciding that Krayon was right. Leaning forward on all fours, Raenef took one last, nervous look up at Eclipse, then poked out his hot pink little tongue and began to lick the melting cream off Eclipse's hand.
* * *
Twitch.
/Err... That kid's good./ The voice commented in awe as Eclipse's eyes slowly moved down to watch through a haze of twitchy lust as Raenef licked his hand clean.
'*whimper*' Eclipse thought, twitching even more as he struggled not to snap like a stick of dry spaghetti and pounce on Raenef in front of Krayon (who would laugh and watch), Erutis (who would also laugh and watch) and Chris (who would scream and run away).
/Come on, jump him! Do it! Do it!!/ The insanity shrieked desperately, and Eclipse, to everyone's surprise, gave a crazed little giggle.
"Yep, that did it. He's gone." Krayon commented proudly, still licking at his ice cream and looking amused. Erutis agreed, absently offering him a can of soda from the cooler at her side. He took it, making a mental note to harass her later after Eclipse had inevitably jumped little Raenef, who was kneeling in front of his teacher, looking adorably confused with a drip of ice cream running down from his lips to his chin. No wonder Eclipse was twitching so much.
Chris, as per usual, didn't really care much about what either of the two 'almost-couples' were doing, although he decided that he would stick around to watch Eclipse snap because it was mildly amusing.
"E-Eclipse?" Raenef whispered worriedly, looking innocently up at his handsome, insane teacher. The black haired demon looked down at him, grinned in a way that made Raenef slightly nervous, and raised the ice cream to his lips to take a long, puposeful lick.
"Yes, my lord?" Eclipse asked, voice thick with lust and eyes half lidded as they stared down at Raenef, making him squirm.
"I... uh... Are-are you alright?" The little lord asked, absently darting his tongue out to lick up the drop of ice cream that had been working its way torturously slowly down his chin. Eclipse gave another manic burst of 'too far gone' laughter and licked his ice cream again.
"Never better, my lord." He insisted, completely contradicting the way he was acting.
"Oh... Ok then." Raenef smiled happily, instantly believing Eclipse. The black haired demon waited until Raenef's back was turned, the little lord preparing to crawl back over to where he'd been sitting, then gave the most evil, lecherous smirk Chris, Erutis or Krayon had ever seen on anyone before. Krayon was actually quite impressed.
"Oh, lord Raenef..." Eclipse said in a slightly sing-song voice. Raenef paused in his crawling and made to turn around, only to be pounced on and kissed like there was no tomorrow. Not that he minded overly much, that is...
* * *
"Well, that was all very nice," Krayon commented, watching Eclipse give Raenef a thorough ravishing on the grass a few metres away.
"Yup," Erutis agreed cheerfully, watching the two demons doing what they did best.
"What is *wrong* with you people??" Chris asked despairingly, shaking his head at the strangeness of it all.
End.