Front Row

[I know he's blood but you can still turn him away]
[You don't owe him anything]

Do you go to the dungeon
To find out how to make peace with your days in the dungeon
Writing a letter to you
Didn't make me feel any more peaceful
Then how I felt when we weren't speaking
Because I didn't cop to what I did
I can't love you
'Cause we're supposed to have professional boundaries
I'd like you to be schooled and in awe
As though you were kissed by God
Full on the lips

I'm in the front row
The front row
With popcorn
I get to see you
See you close up

[I'm too tired to recount the unpleasantries one by one]
[One minute I want to banish you]
[The next I want to be on a deserted island with you]
[Along with my three favorite cd's]
[Ambivalent yet in your bed we've yet to acknowledge what really happened]


Slid into the ditch
I have this overwhelming loss of ambition
We said let's name thirty good reasons
Why we shouldn't be together
I started by saying things like "You smoke" "You live in New Jersey"
You started saying things like "You belong to the world"
All of which could have been easily refuted
But the conversation was hypothetical
I am totally short of breath for you
Why can't you shut your stuff off

I'm in the front row
The front row
With popcorn
I get to see you
See you close up

[And I laughed until my lungs hurt]
[I love how you bust my chops]
[You don't always feel seen sometimes you feel erasable]
[Unfortunately I cannot reciprocate in my current state]
[I think we should be careful of how much time we spend together]

For a while I'm speaking
You know how much you hate to be interrupted
Maybe spend some time alone
To fill up your proverbial cup
So that it doesn't always have to be about you
I've been wanting your undivided attention
I like the fact that you're nothing like me
Are you not burdened by the lack of perspective
People have of your charmed life seeing

I'm in the front row
The front row
With popcorn
I get to see you
See you close up

[You never meant to be ungrateful]
[Nor held up to be whipped or wept for certainly not analysed]
[Prodded at more ways than one]
[Apparently you've been misrepresented dealing with the concept]
[Of arrows being slung towards your outrageous fortune]

Hey, I'm not mad at you guardian
I'm mad at myself for spending so much time with you and your jeckyl and hydeness
I'm glad I figuratively slapped you on the wrist
You laughed a wicked laugh
And said "Come here, let me clip your wings!"
[I know he's blood but you can still turn him away]
[You don't owe him anything]
"Raise the roof", he yelled, "Yeah, raise the roof!", I yelled back
[Unfortunately you needed a health scare to reprioritize]
No thanks to the soap box
Having me rile against them
Won't make an ounce of difference

I'm in the front row
The front row
With popcorn
I get to see you
See you close up

[Oh the things I've done for you many]
[A sitch a friend a man's been left for you]
[Oh the books I've read for you]
[The tongues I've bitten for you many]
[A new city for you many]
[A risk taken for you (not a single regret)]

 

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