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his foster parents where kind enough to give him a laptop for becoming their adopted son. But he never love them truly as their true parents, because sometimes, they really act kind of NORMAL and insists him of changing what he believes in life. He�s been to psychiatric tests and considered to be insane. But he always has one excuse. � I am not crazy, I�m just �MISUNDERSTOOD!� And he really was, don�t you agree? Well the shrink doesn�t. To tell you the truth they don�t know either. Worst case ever as they explain it. His parents where also the ones not likely to inspire or to encourage him to do as such but they where the ones who always bought his collection of dark pocketbooks and short morbid stories. And they�ve always complained about what he asks but still giving it to him because he would rather read stuff like that than to whine about buying him a 9210 NOKIA cell phone.
But from the likes of what happened when he was still a kid, he�d never change. And like the wound, what happened will certainly not HEAL, but just be INFECTED until it kills him.

CHAPTER 3: ULRICH

The weirdo. The Satanist. The artist. The negative being. A morbid identity. Schizophrenic. The unloved. The poet. The tortured. The rock fan. The misunderstood. The writer. And the so-called DEATH TRIGER. But what is his name? Well, all his life he only used code names. He used the code name, �CHIRLU of MARS� �CHIRLU� meaning his reversed name and, �MARS� meaning the god of war. Not that creepy as he is but can be considered as an original and unique title to keep. But on the other hand, his real name is,
LUCIFER ULRICH.

You can judge him by the name, and you can now tell why God didn�t respond to his callings. But no. He only changed his name to this after he realized that he wanted a much better name more than, �SIGMUND� he cannot take it when he first knew that it was taken from Sigmund Freud�s name the famous psychologist who discovered and distinguished the 3 personalities of man when he was reading his book, Interpretation Of Minds. He was of course stunned that there where three personalities within a human being but, since he didn�t want to base his name from someone who�s genius is observing minds. Ulrich however found and noticed unbelievable things, one of which this one, everyone has their own definition of their names and particularly his attitude would just be like Freud�s, like when you know someone who�s name is Albert, doesn�t it seem that all who have those name like his is almost but like smart as Albert Einstein. Makes sense? I think so too. His opinion is almost like, being smart because he has a genius� name. He was also flattered at first but no one could stand in what in what he believes in not even him. His foster parents agreed with the name he chose because he had the reason that the meaning of Lucifer is: Child Of Light. His forgivingly and normal foster parents agreed. After all he was spoiled at them because they never had they�re own son nor daughter because they are both on the big case of sterility.

He was born on the 6th of June 1986. After 6 years, specifically in 1992. He committed his first suicide attempt four weeks right after his mother�s death. In 1993, he tried to jump off a building when he was just adopted by his foster parents because he couldn�t take that he was to be adopted by two different and complete strangers and he kept remembering his murdered mother. In 1998, he attempted it twice with poison and with lacerations from a blade. But until then up until now he kept doing it sometimes without a reason or just when feeling depressed. Who knows how many he tried to kill himself? And no one will ever know why. But the only thing that is in the back of his mind when he doesn�t continue on doing it is because to what I�ve said earlier: his opinions are not that open to every body. He wanted to make them realize that there is no brighter side before you die. Because there is no one there that can tell when you are to be exactly to die because it will get you by surprise. And he wanted that. He wanted to be killed not with the shocked face or an unexpected matter, but whenever he really wants to and of course when his so-called mission is over to open everybody�s eyes that there will be no bright side. Especially the ones coming from God, and the fact that there is no bright side will come from a trusted voice known as the child of light.

CHAPTER 4: UNFELT

I guess, he would make his next suicide attempt when there will be something that can really hurt him. Something that the ordinary people call, �LOVE�. Perhaps you don�t know it as well as I do but he never had fallen in love before. It�s not because his not good looking and all or cool. Actually he is good looking and is Satanically cool by his kind. His clothes are always are in black as in totally and wears a trench coat, has inverted cross earrings long hair, red contact lens, has a bracelet that says, �WEIRDO�, demonic rings and one mood ring that accidentally never changed in color that is black too and a necklace that has an questioned marked inverted cross as a symbol for questioning God�s being. Believe it or not, he is the simplest among all than of his kind. Others may have nose rings and colored hair and tattooed bodies and do marijuana every time they watch porn. But these people are of his kind, some even experienced to be in rehabs and psychiatric tests but they didn�t suffer like the one Ulrich has gone through. But one thing they have in common is that they all have a certain problem or problems and then Death Trigger�s novels come along like it was really something that they wanted for and something that they can relate with, and right after you relate, YOU DIE.

As I�ve said, he never had been interested on any girl, normal or even in his kind. Not that he wasn�t attractive like I said; he didn�t have any reason to court a bitch or an insignificant chick. The girl would only get on his way of typing and thinking. His point of view on them is typically not what he gets on what the things he likes. He never even dreamed of loving anyone. And this known fact can also be the reason that he didn�t care of anyone, not even himself. Because if he did, he�d realized life would have a meaning to stay alive to be with some one much more that he wouldn�t want to waste it.

Yep! He hasn�t felt that at all not even in movies if the protagonist gets the big boobed chick or the idiot guy who does everything and even dies for the gal who doesn�t even know that he exists. �SHIT! What a waste of his life! I mean, he could die without the reason from the girl or what but he died because of her?! MAN! That�s too idiotic!� YEAH! As if he watched those kind of things in his lifetime.
Well that explains every thing does it? He�s outta LUV? Is that it? The adolescent Satanist is just outta luv. No man could live without knowing somebody loves him. Not even the first Neanderthal lived alone without no one caring for him even if they didn�t had specific language back then. And yes, those cave apes loved each other having their own siblings and all. Ulrich also didn�t have love from his original parents, hatred burns in his heart, no friends to help, traumatized when he sees the Teletubbies and without the care of someone that has to love his for what he is.
No one made him felt the way to realize that life would be easier to live when you have someone to share it with; no body has shown this to him. If you where Ulrich, what the hell would you feel? Hollow and insecure like grand parents in the home for the ages. Well, he shares his opinions with every body on campus that would normally get some chicks with it but what he writes about is good� if you�re a weirdo. So no one even dares to like him that much because they know his true identity in his novels.

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