|| Girlfriend Hunt
Previous
Yaara: Hello everyone! Shiri and myself decided to show our...um... "Support" in Kian's new girlfriend (girlfriend, sex buddy, whateva you wanna call it Blondie!), Jessica. So we went girlfriend hunting! *Laughs evilly*
Shiri: Yaara...
Yaara: *keeps on laughing evilly, now shaking outta madness*
Shiri: Yaara...
Yaara: *rolls on the floor laughing*
Shiri: YAARA!
Yaara: Eh? What?
Shiri: Calm down...lets hunt her first, then lose it!
Yaara: Right. Well do you have everything we need?
Shiri: I think so...
Yaara: Net?
Shiri: Check
Yaara: Cage?
Shiri: Check
Yaara: A real size poster of Brad Pitt?
Shiri: What for??
Yaara: We have to get her in the cage somehow, you know!
Shiri: Okay.... check.
Yaara: We're ready to rock and roll.
Shiri: Now...where can we find a fake blond bitch that�s smooching all over Kian?
Yaara: Easy, you see there *points on a fake blond bitch that�s smooching all over Kian* here�s the fake blond bitch that�s smooching all over Kian
Shiri: Makes sense. Now what?
Yaara: We need to get Kian away from her...any ideas?
Shiri: Well we did left the real size poster of Pamela Anderson in the car!
Yaara: So go get it, huh?
Shiri: Sure thing...
*~*~10 minutes later~*~*
Yaara: What took you so long?!
Shiri: Um...Shane was changing clothes in the car into his black leather suit so I thought I might help him...*smiles idiotically*
Yaara: Aaargh yuk! *Tries to take that image from her mind yet fails* Yuk! Yuk! Yuk! That is an image I did not need to see!
Shiri: Sorry...anyway here's the poster!
Yaara: Ok *grabs the poster* now where is that dumb dumb Shane?
Shane: *jumps from the top of a car* *lands on the ground with his hands on his waist* *looks at a point in the sky above him without moving*
Shiri: Um...Shane? *Snaps fingers in front of his face*
Shane: Eh? Oh yeah...you called for me?
Shiri: No I just like snapping my fingers like that!
Shane: You do? My cousin used to have the same problem... it was just snap, snap, snap, all day long...
Shiri: *staring at Shane blankly*
Yaara: Riiight... Anyway, Shane, when I'll open this poster you'll go grab the blond bitch for us.
Shane: Uh huh.
Yaara: *holding the poster wide opened*
Kian: Excuse me one second... *pushing the blond bitch away* *putting on a manly voice* Hello Pamela
Shiri: *jumping up and down* it worked it worked!
Shane: Running to the blond bitch, then jumping in front of her and staring at a point in the sky again*
Blond bitch: Omggg it's Shaaaaaaane!!!!!! *jumping on him and kissing him all over*
Kian: *Staring at Pamela's....shirt, not noticing Shiri or Shane* So you busy tomorrow night?
Yaara: *catching Kian with the net* Gotcha! *dragging him to the car's direction*
Shiri: Yaara!! The net's not for Kian!
Kian: Let me gooooo!
Yaara: Sorry *blushing* I just kinda liked the idea of having you locked in the cage I was gonna get you into.....
Meanwhile, Shane got the blonde bitch to the car and put her in the cage.
Blonde bitch: Aaargh! Let me go! Let me go! Let me go!
Shane: You really think that if you'll say it a lot of times I�ll actually let you go?
Blonde bitch: Um...yeah
Shane: Um...ok *lets her go*
Meanwhile Yaara helps Kian outta the net.
Kian: Thanks...but now my shirt is so dirty, I'll have to take it off
Yaara: *looking at the camera, giving it a winning smile*
Shiri: *grabs the camera and drags it to her direction* Yaara please come back from dreamland
Yaara: Ah rats with you!
Shiri: Oh you idiot Shane let her go!
Yaara: What?! Shane you nincompoop! Nitwid! A bloody idiot!
Nicky: Anyone called me?
Yaara: Ah buzz off *pushes Nicky outta the picture*
Shiri: Shane you idiot catch the bitch!
Shane: Oh yeah! *Runs after her with his hands spread in front of him, looking very stupid*
Shiri: *looks at the camera* *shakes head* It's so hard to get good help these days...
Kian: Wait a sec here, Pamela ain't real! *Looks really shocked of what he just found out*
Yaara: Well doh! Welcome to earth Ki!
Kian: Yeah I was a bit 'flying without wings' lately...hehehe oink oink!
Shane: *stops running, then a light ball appears above his head* I'm just gonna go back to the CAR...where KIAN is standing TOPLESS...
Blond bitch: *stops running as well* Kian...? MY Kian? Topless...?? *turned around with a sweet smile* Actually I don't have anything planned for today and... y'know... If you need me for anything... I'm here for ya.
Shane: I thought so *smiling proudly*
Kian: *still shocked over Pamela* Does that mean our date is off?...
Shiri: 'fraid so. But y'know I've nothing to do tomorrow night *wink*
Kian: *cheeky grin* Really?..... Oh wait. I'm supposed to be with Jessica.
Shiri: And that bitch's supposed to be blond!
Kian: You mean she's not a real blond?? *shocked* This is too much!
*Shane appears with the bitch*
Yaara: Shane, You did it! I have to admit, I didn't think you could do it.
Blond bitch: *running to Kian, pushing Shiri away*
Shiri: Hey!!!!!!
Kian: You! *pointing at the blond*
Blond bitch: Me? *looking around*
Kian: Yesss you! You're not a real blond!
Blond bitch: *innocent look* Of course I am..!
Shiri: Yea? Then what's....*getting something out of her handbag*...this!!
*Everybody's staring at it, shocked*
Kian: It's...
Shane: It's...
Yaara: It's...
Shiri: The same thing Kian uses to get his hair blond!
Kian: Hey she's right that is mine! You stole it from me on our C2C UK tour, didn't ya?
Blonde bitch: Well yeah and before I stole it from you I stole one from Nicky...
Nicky: *runs into the scene* Hold on just a tiny minute young *stops* old lady! I never dyed my hair! It's natural! *Passes hands in hair*
Yaara: Right and I'm sleeping with the fake blond dud here *points at Kian*
Kian: You know it's possible
Shiri: Yaara!
Yaara: Sorry...
Kian: Did I just say that? Did I just told a 14 years old girl it's possible for us to sleep together?! Is that possible? I mean, I'm too old for her, I'm 22!
Shiri: And bimbo here is 26, your point?
Nicky: Least she ain't an 18 years old virgin?
Kian: Hey! That's where I draw the line, no virgin as my girlfriends!
Yaara & Shiri: Ah damn!
Shane: Um...am I still needed here or I can go and get a nice blow from Gillian?
Kian: Hey! That's what you and my cousin are doing together?
Blonde bitch: But sweetie pie, that's what you made me do last night
Kian: Shhhh! Shut up bitch!
Yaara: Is it just me or this has became a rated bit?
Shiri: It has, thanks to your sick mind!
Yaara: Well I am called 'The Kinky Devil'!
Nicky: By who?
Yaara: Um...myself...
Kian: Right!
Blonde bitch: Um...hey look here's Brad Pitt! *Pointing at the real size poster*
Shiri: Shane! Grab her! NOW!
Shane: Oh...ok *yawns* *grabs the blonde bitch* got her *yawns again*
*Cage closing down on both Shane and the blond bitch*
Shane: ARGH!
Yaara: Shiri look what you did! Now Shane is trapped too! Do you know what kind of torture is that to be stuck in a cage with a.... *stops and smiles evilly*
Shiri: Hehe *wink*
Shane: Hey what are you two talking about there? Get me out of here!
Yaara: Erm... I'm sorry Shane... y'see, the key.... it's...
Shiri: *getting the key from behind Yaara's back and throwing it to the woods* it's gone!
Shane: Hey!!! You did that on purpose!
Shiri: Prove it.
Shane: I'm gonna get you for this!
Shiri: Sure, sure... we'll see what you can do from in there!
Blond bitch: Mmmm Shane did anyone ever tell you that you have a nice bum?
Shane: You think so? *smiling happily*
Blond bitch: I'm gonna like being here
Kian: Shane you better not cheat on my cousin or I'm gonna ^*%@$ @*#$ %*!@$!!!! Hey...how come Yaara can curse and I get this bunch of strange keyboard marks?
Mark: Anyone called me?
Yaara: Why do they have to be such nincompoops?
Shiri: So you can use the word "nincompoop"
Yaara: True...
Shiri: So now what?
Yaara: Isn't it obv? The blonde bitch will now sleep with Shane, Nicky will get pissed off at it and the whole Shnicky thing I wrote with Kerry will start all over again!
Nicky: Shane's cheating on me?! Shane how dare you! *slaps Shane*
Shane: I'm sorry *starts crying* I cry silently, I cry inside of me, I cry hopelessly 'cause I know I'll never taste your *ahem* again!
Yaara: Oh-oh, this thing has gone outta control! They sing the version Daria made to I Cry!
Shiri: Shit
Yaara: You better take over!
Shiri: Yea ermmm... Kian! Are you gonna sit there and watch or are ya gonna defend your cousin??
Kian: I'll just sit here...
Shiri: Kian!!!
Kian: Okay okay! *stepping closer to the cage*
Blond bitch: Does it hurt? *checking out his burning cheek*
Shane: Yea it really hurts *sob*
Kian: Shane how dare you!! *slapping his other cheek*
Shane: *crying and sobbing even more* He just hit meeee
Kian: You cheater!
Shane: And you fell for the real-size Pamela poster trick hehehe
Kian: Shut up, it's a touchy spot!
Shiri: Shane nobody said you're allowed to talk now!
Yaara: Well done Shiri, you're starting to get the hang of it
Shiri: Thanks *smiling happily*
Shane: Sorry it won't happen again
Shiri: It better not.
Yaara: Ok, it's time to face the truth
Kian: *stares blankly*
Yaara: Smile everyone!
Nicky: Why?
Yaara: Because you're on Westlaugh/Moments With Westlife's (circle the site you're in) hidden camera show!
Shiri: Hehe and Bitch, Shane ain't who you think he is, he's actually Kian!
Kian: He is?
Shane: I am?
Yaara: *brings Bryan and an Uzi* Yeah you are Shane! And yeah he is!
Blonde bitch: Ah, ok!
Yaara: Ok boys and girls, today we'll have a special lesson, you'll learn what a rape is all about and how it really happens!
Shane: They will? *swallows*
Yaara: Ah-huh! And to help us out we have the blonde bitch and Shano here!
Shane: We do?
Yaara: Ah-huh *smiles evilly*
Shiri: Get going bitch
*The next scene is rated to...ah...whatever! You can watch it, we don't care*
Shane: Ah!
Blonde bitch: *tears clothes off him*
Yaara: Whoah! *looks at it from every different angle* I can't see it
Shiri: Neither can I!
Kian: Where is it?
Nicky: Oh that, it's small but it's there somewhere...
To Be Continued � or not...
Previous
Back to Fictions