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Date: 10/29/00 5:32:29 PM Central Standard Time
From: [email protected]
UF:" Is that your bag of treats or are you happy to see me?"
By: Susan Ellen Field
The Fk characters belong to James Parriott and company...
All UFfers are used without thier permission as usual...
Any resemblance to UFfers and real folk is pure coincidence, cause ,be
serious!1 could we actually exist ?
Beta read by: LOLOLOLOL..............
Permission to post to any place online....
So enough of this!! go read!! geez.... gotta tell you guys everything! :)
Although you might actually think the disclaimer part is better than the
story!!!
*************Halloween night.....2000**************
The usual suspects were:
Jules was dressed as a printer, complete with a heavy ream of paper hanging
from the front of her costume.
Julia was dressed a Cobra which made it hard to drive,or eat, or... well,
you know!!!
Lorelei was dressed as an exotic *Dancer* :)
April's costume consisted of rewrites of Fears chapters superglued to a body
suit.
Lora was dressed in leather from head to toe.And a coke can purse.
Gail was wearing an Entrance sign on the front of her, and a Exit sign on the
back!
And Susan came dressed as a bag of e-mails about to be sent to TPTB!!
Yes, it was another UFfer Halloween!!!!
************Earlier that evening******************
The Uffers all bunched up inside the van that was taking them to the
Halloween party arrainged by Susan.
Naturally, that should have been thier first clue as to thier next move..
namely running like heck very fast in the opposite direction!
But Uffers being what they are, and Susan being the one to write this
whatever *IT* is) They had aboslutly (not a typo!) no choice in the
matter!
Now, as you might have guessed, it was a dark and stormy night.Visibility was
at a minimum,especially since Julia had the map open in front of everyones
faces!
"Are you sure this is the way to the party"? Asked Jules, trying to plug
herself into the vans cigerette lighter so the printer would work.
Lora leaned over Julia's shoulder to have a look at the map as April held a
flashlight on it.
"It says here that we should be coming to a fork in the road any time now!"
And sure enough, just as Lora said that,Janet (who to this point had been
quiet, said "There!! I see the fork!!"
Sure enough, there was a fork in the road,unfortunatly for the UFfers, it was
a real fork, and Janet said it just a tad late!...and so,they wound up with
two flat tires!!!
"Oh thats just great!! now what do we do?" Said Julia.
"Well, how about we dance down the road and see if we could catch a ride?"
Asked Lorelei.
"Wait!! dont think that will be nessesary, besides, everyone knows Susan has
no rythem! theres a horse drawn carriage headed this way!"said Sandra (who as
you might have noticed, wasen't even in this story till just now!! :)
Now, the storm was getting intense.... and the carriage seemed to be moving
in slow motion... and the horses, well, they were large, and dont even ask
about the poop they left on the road...with the wind building up, was getting
pretty darn smelly!
A ominous figure stepped down from the Carriage and towards the UFfers...a
large brimmed hat covered his features, and a cape covered the rest.
"Looks Amish to me!" whispered Lorelei! :)
"Please allow me to take you to the White Castle up on the mountain up
there!"
"Oh man, lead the way, I could sure use a couple of burgers!" Said
Susan,looking over at Shan who was dressed as a tofu casserole.(notice how
people keep showing up in here?)
A collective groan was heard by all, as they stepped inside the strange
carriage.
"Say, dont you think we are going a bit too fast?" Asked Jules, as the
print-outs were coming out smudged.
"Julia peeked her head out the carriage window and looked up to yell out to
the mysterious driver.a minute later she drew her head back in , white as a
ghost!!
"Julia, whats wrong?" Asked April.
"The driver is gone!!"
"Oh Shit!!" they all yelled out.....well, except for Susan who was writing
this....
Well gentle readers... what would become of the UFfers? would they surive to
see another crushed coke can? hmmmmmmmmm!!!
The rain was pouring very hard as the Carriage suddenly stopped in front of a
huge Castle on the top of the hill......
They stepped out and ran for the huge door with the strange blue ball
knockers.
The door handle turned, and it opened... no one was there!!!
Running in,They were in awe of the place!!!
"You know,this dosen't look like any White Castle I've ever been to!" said
Susan.
"You think they actually will put those little pickles on them?"
Silence filled the room for a moment as the group of buds let that one slide
by....
They slowly made thier way into the elegant drawing room.
It seemed to have everything .including handwritten cards that had each
UFfers name on them!!
"Hey, how did they know we would be here?" Said Janet.
Julia opened the card addressed to her. it read:
Velcome to Castle White,owned and operated by the Burger Meister ,Von
Wilmhelm von forgettabout it !
Ve hope you will enjoy your stay, so go to your rooms now, cause Susan needs
to get on with the story!!!
Susan Chuckled,this guy spelled worse than she did!!
Carrying the candles that were left for them, one by one they climbed the
winding staircase that led to thier rooms...
"Say, this *forgettabout it* guy sounds strange...
"Yeah, but Susan is even stranger, so lets get upstairs!"
The rooms were all the same... each one had a one desk, one chair, and a
computer.....
(of course there were the extras needed for them all...
1.assorted snacks
2.assorted drinks
3.various pets at thier feet or for sitting on thier laps
4.and a nearby bathroom!
5. a nearby TV in case a particular pair of guys should be on a show while
the chat was going on!
A strange blank look covered thier faces as they one by one sat down in the
seats and logged on....were they in a trance? or was it a slow chat night?
LOL!!!!
(this is getting weird, isn't it? )
Suddenly the UFfers were together again,virtually,seperated only by the walls
seperating thier rooms...
a message appeared to them all on thier screens...
Rosebud: "So glad you could join "US" for this Halloween evening".
All at once the UFfers awoke from thier trances!!!
Could it be? was you know who here?
was HE the strange Amish guy Lorelei saw?
Was Nicholas with him? there was after all a "US" mentioned!!
And most importantly of all, was there actually White Castle burgers going to
be served here? cause Susan was getting hungry writing this nonsense!
The Uffers ran as fast as they could... then..... there....Lacroix and
Nicholas stood....
The Roman General costume and see- Thru knightie on them....
Crushed coke cans surrounded thier feet.....
"HeY!!" wake up!!
"What?" said Julia as she wiped her eyes.
"What happened?"
"We all fell asleep watching the horrorthon on the Sci-fi channel." Lora
said,as she re-arranged the corset.
"Yeah, well thier line-up could put anyone to sleep".Said April.
"Say, did you all have the same dream we did?" said Gail as she woke up and
fell asleep again.
"Yeah, would seem so!" said Jules, checking out her printouts of the
aforementioned dream."
"Too bad, Said Janet,I sure did enjoy where it was leading!"
Suddenly,Julia squinted her eyes... say guys, do you think if we all logged
on right this minute that we could actually get......
Well readers... as fast as you can say Whatsupwiththat,the UFfers all
dispersed to thier seperate computers to log on on this very special
Halloween......
The End? you can always hope!! :)
Welll there ya go, my Halloween present to you all..
Hope you enjoyed the little respite from the Halloween repast so to speak!!!
Hugs to all UFfers everywhere!!
And pleasant dreams!!!
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