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"Egging you On" By: Susan Ellen field March 24, 2002 Disclaimer:all UFfers are used without permission as usual... Dedicated to My bud April who despite not feeling well, and me pestering her continues to help me with stuff!! The UFfers gathered around their television sets. "I cannot believe they gave this show air time again!" said Julia grabbing the bowl of popcorn. "Yeah, who would have thought that after the last time on, it would actually return for another appearance?" Said Gail coming in from the kitchen with the hot butter before going back into the kitchen. ......................................... The announcer came on.... "Welcome everyone to another segment of "What the heck is Susan cooking now ?" And now it is my great pleasure to introduce the hostess of this wonderful show Susan!! "Oh gads, tell me she isn�t wearing that!" said Lora, admiring the leather outfit she herself wore. Susan came out in a "UFfers eat anything I want them too" t-shirt, with baggy blue jeans and her world famous payless sneakers. "Hi everyone out there! I would now like to introduce my assistant April!" April came out pushing a large covered cart on wheels. She looked up and smiled to the studio audience. "Today as you may all guess is my very special Easter Show, where I shall whip up my famous Egg Twalettepapier. (g) "I didn�t know Susan knew French! Jules sickered "Neither does Susan!" Everyone sat back and began to watch as Susan began to prepare.. "First, My trusty assistant April will hand me over the main ingredient. April lifted the very large egg over to the counter. "Hey what kind of egg is that?" Asked Nancy. "Now I am supposing you all are wondering what kind of egg I am using here. Well, let me tell you folks, this was one hard sucker to find. its a authentic egg leftover from the original Tarzan movie ! yup!! had to search Hi and Low, and when they didn�t have it, I had to go elsewhere, even a few Big Lots! but I finally found this. Coming out of lurkdom Janet asked "Is that egg edible?" to which Julia replied, "Is anything Susan cooks? The point now taken, the show continued... Well, first thing we have to do is make sure that the egg is hard boiled. So without further hesitation, lets put this sucker into some pre-boiled water.. well, its been a few seconds, should do it!" "Hey wait! That won't hard boil an egg!" Said Lorelei. "Due to time constraints, we have had to skip a few steps like actually waiting for it to make sure to boil the right way, but what the heck if it drips it drips, right?" And now April? April handed over the next crucial step item in a bag. now as you all know, making designs on Easter eggs can be a pain.. I might add even a chore.. and so with this new method that I the great Susan have invented, you can whip up fantastic Easter eggs with just an ordinary item from the house... Susan slowly removed the item. "Yes folks, now you too can recreate what I am doing here, and surprise your friends with gifts.. Susan took the four pack out of the bag. "You slowly unwrap the paper which has wonderful pressed in quilted designs on it, and after applying glue to the egg, carefully wrap the double ply sheets slowly around until the egg is completely covered. and voila!! Easter Egg designing is no longer a problem.. Of course you might want to replace the roll you took out of the bathroom!" "Say guys? Do we have anymore toilet paper? We are out in the bathroom" said Desiree. The UFfers froze.. "Uh, Those Easter eggs we got as a gift. You know the ones we all ate yesterday and thought were really beautifully decorated if a tad dry? Asked Jules. (Julia, her voice cracking spoke ) "Yes, what about them? " (Afraid of the answer). "Well I just noticed the card "For my UFfish friends, Eat, enjoy" love , Susan "First one in the bathroom is a rotten egg!" Shouted Les. "Somebody unwrap a few Easter Eggs! We need toilet paper here fast!" shouted Lorelei. Well, I hope you enjoyed my quick foray into the world of Easter... (Hey what the heck is up with Susan and these big words anyhow?") love you guys... Happy Easter to all, remember to watch FK starting April 1st, and come to my newest auction starting today!! xoxoxoxoxoxo |