However, my double happiness commences with a fever the next morning. Without a single short notice, Varanasi becomes Varanashit to me. I get sick, sick as a dog.
The Hindus are some hopeless extreme optimists. As they believe that bathing in the Ganges can wash away sins; or standing in the Ganges in one leg for an entire month can heal all illness. As for the latter, it's certainly worth a try. The only problem is, I'm no Hundu. Stepping into their holy water as a gentile may bring me no bless but only my stubborn genetic conflicts against all things Indian.
India is punishing me for not revering. The evil inside me just clings on and wouldn't go away.
The following days are woven with endless vomiting and diarrhea wxploding. My entire digestive system somehow turns into a water pipe that's short and straight. Within then minutes, foods go in either fo out from one end on the top or the other end down below. The stomach holds nothing until I could hardly keep my pants on. within one week my jeans all seem over-sized to me.
At the same time, Amitabh Bachchan, the heart of Bollywood as well as of India, his latest movie is on show in local cinemas. The fact of dedicating my day sacrificing my fun to toilets almost makes my cry.
Another hard day of suffer. Scenes of the public cremation come back to haunt me like a curse. My heart aches as if I'm the one on fire.
After throwing my guts out in a restaureant, I throw myself back to bed. Bruno turns the TV on. Terminator III is playing on the movie channel.
Risking my life everyday living with millions of bold and loud Indians outside, now Mr. Governor is creating more chaos inside.
Terminator, is slowly killing me.
As I lie there on bed breathlessly staring up. Instead of a pretty woman in red saris pouring down rose petals as what we see in the TV commercial Incredible India, I can almost see my own self floating on the ceiling like a balloon, looking miserably down at my own worn-out body slowly turning transparent.
Another explosion on TV.
I feel the shakes and fall off the ceiling. When I open my eyes again, up on the ceiling the balloon me is no longer there. But something nasty is swallowing the house.
The tree in toilet has grown so mych within the last ten seconds. Still it keeps growing and growing until the entire ceiling is covered with its branches and thick dark green moss-like leaves. There's even a gaint octopus hanging down its big slimy arms waving to me.
A nightmare, I keep telling myself. Then I shit my eyes tightly for seconds. I reopen my eyes in the hope of seeing a normal yellowing ceiling with spider web. The tree and the giant octopus, they are still there.
I roll over to search for help. To my greatest surprise, Bruno still sits peacefully on his bed watching Terminator while stuffing himself with fries purchased from Burger King. How weird the more he eats the more fries left in the plastic bag. In the silence of fear I saw fries keep popping out from nowhere until they cover the floor and I'm completely buried in an ocean of potatos corpses.