Title: Never, Neverland part 9/10
Author: Kjiara
Author's E-Mail: kayjay@sunwave.net
Category: PJR
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: Season three
Archive: Yes, just give credit where due
Feedback: Makes my day!
http://www.geocities.com/kjiara
Disclaimer: I don't own any of 'em.
Summary: What if Cinderella Story had a slightly different ending?



Never, Neverland part 9/10
by Kjiara

Joey was slow to regain her senses.  It took her a moment to
realise she was in fact in her kitchen, in Pacey Witter's arms. 
It was real.  All of it.  The gentle touches and the tender
confession.  It was real!  Oh, God!  Dawson!  Over Pacey's
shoulder she saw the intense betrayal in her best friend's eyes
just before he turned and fled the room.  She looked up into
Pacey's saddened blue eyes.  "Pace?"

Pacey stepped out of her arms.  Hanging his head in resignation he
said, "Go."

Joey touched his chin gently.  "Wait here for me."  She tilted her
head to make eye contact with him.  "Please, Pacey.  I have to
talk to him."

Pacey's smile was forced.  "Go.  Talk to Dawson."

Joey searched his eyes for a clue as to how he was feeling.  All
she saw was resignation and sadness.  "I promise, I won't be gone
long."  She stood on tiptoe to kiss him, smiled reassuringly and
left.

Pacey couldn't remember ever feeling pain this intense.  He should
have known.  It was always going to be Dawson.  No matter what, he
was never going to be number one in Joey's heart or mind.  The
worst part was he couldn't even slink away to lick his wounds.  He
had to watch Sarah and Alexander.  Damn!  He slammed his hand
against the counter before heading into the living room.  Maybe
playing with the kids would help him get his mind off the fact
that the woman he loved was right now trying to explain away their
first kiss.


                         ~*~
                           
                           
Joey climbed the ladder up to Dawson's bedroom.  She stood on the
roof of the porch trying to catch her breath.  She had a feeling
she knew exactly how this encounter was going to go.  She was
determined that tonight would be different than the horrible night
she remembered from her dreams.  She took a fortifying breath and
stepped into the bedroom.  Dawson was standing staring at the
Imagine poster on his wall.  "Dawson, I -"

He spun to face her.  "Don't!  Don't try to explain.  There is no
way you can justify what I just saw."

Joey shook her head vehemently.  "No, Dawson.  I'm not going to
try to *justify* what you just saw."  She crossed her arms
defiantly.

"Oh, really?  You're not?  Then why are you here, Joey?  Are you
planning on begging for my forgiveness?  You didn't mean to do it?
It just happened?  Is that it?  I'm supposed to forget I walked in
on you kissing Pacey.  Forget that my two best friends just
betrayed me in the worst possible way."  

Joey shook her head.  She was trembling from head to toe.  She
closed her eyes for a moment to get her anger under control.  She
opened them to find Dawson staring at her expectantly.  "No,
Dawson," she began, "I have no intention of begging for
forgiveness."

"Well that's good because I'm not so sure I can -"

"I have no intention of begging for forgiveness," she went on as
though he hadn't spoken, " because I've done nothing wrong."  

"You're kidding right?" Dawson exploded.

Joey put considerable effort into remaining calm.  "No, Dawson, I
promise, I'm dead serious," she declared coolly.  "What exactly is
it you think I should be begging forgiveness for?"

"You betrayed me!"

"How?" she returned.  "How did I betray you?  We haven't been
together for almost a year, Dawson.  By your choice I might add."

"So is that what this is.  Revenge for turning you down?"

"Don't flatter yourself,"  Joey shot back.  "Believe it or not,
Dawson, there are things that happen in my life that have
absolutely nothing to do with you.   This is one of them."

"So, if you're not here to apologise then why are you here?"

"I don't know, Dawson, I thought maybe my best friend might want
to talk to me about what just happened."

Dawson snorted.  "If I really was your best friend I never would
have walked in to find you in Pacey Witter's arms."

Joey shook her head.  "One thing has absolutely nothing to do with
the other, Dawson.  The way I feel about Pacey has nothing to do
with the way I feel about you and our friendship."  Joey shivered
at the memories those words conjured.

"Right now I'm not so sure we have a friendship."

Joey held up her hand, her whole body vibrating with anger.  "You
know what, Dawson?  Don't.  Don't try it.  You are not going to
like what will happen, believe me."

"What are you talking about, Joey?  I'm not the one risking our
friendship here."

"Yes, Dawson.  You are.  You're the one who is trying to make me
chose between the boy who's been my best friend my entire life and
the boy I love.  And I won't let you do that to me."  Joey's chin
came up defiantly.  "I love Pacey, Dawson.  I love him.  And
tonight I found out he loves me too.  That makes me incredibly
happy.  If you can't be happy for me then I'm sorry because I'm
not going to give up what he and I can have just so you can have
things your way."  She went to the window.  "You're my best
friend, Dawson.  Act like it."  She climbed onto the roof leaving
Dawson standing alone.

                         ~*~
                           
Joey was surprised to see Bessie, Bodie, Carson and Doug in the
living room when she got home.  "Hey," she said uncertainly. 
"You're home early. 

"The movie was dreadful so we left."  Bessie stood and approached
her sister.  "Are you okay, Jo?"

Joey looked at them slightly confused.  "I'm fine."  She caught
the look Carson was giving her.  "What?"  She then realised
someone was missing.  "Where's Pacey?"

"He left as soon as we got here," Carson answered.

"He what?  Dammit, I told him to wait."

"What happened here tonight, Jojo?" Carson asked.

Joey looked at her cousin, curiously.  Something in her tone was
off. "What's wrong Carson?"

"You tell me.  All I know is that we arrived here to find Pacey
obviously upset.  He bolted out of here so fast I didn't even get
a chance to ask him what was wrong."

"Damn."  Joey turned to her sister.  "Bessie, I need to borrow the
truck."

"What?  Joey -"

"Please, Bess.  I have to talk to him," Joey pleaded.

"You don't even know where he is," Bessie reasoned.

Joey shook her head.  "I know exactly where he went."

                         ~*~
                           
Pacey sat aboard True Love contemplating his future. He looked
around him.  It still surprised him how well she was turning out. 
All that hard work was paying off.  The boat was something he
could be proud of.  The only problem was, he wasn't so sure he
wanted to finish her now.  Joey was such a huge part of her.  Some
of his favourite memories involved the two of them working
together on True Love.  Now he doubted if there would be any more
such memories.  He felt his chest tighten at the thought.  How was
he supposed to finish True Love when her inspiration was no longer
a part of his life?  He had no doubt Joey would chose Dawson.  She
always had.  And he was certain Dawson would make sure he was no
longer involved in their lives.  He felt the pressure behind his
eyes build at the thought of never being able to be close to Joey
again.  How was he going to cope when she shut him out in order to
appease Dawson.   How would he deal with losing her.  His throat
was beginning to ache with the effort to keep his tears at bay,
when he heard a soft voice.

"Permission to come aboard?"

Pacey stood and looked over the side to find Joey smiling up at
him.  He let out a shuddering breath and whispered, "Permission
granted."

Joey climbed the ladder up to the deck.  "I thought you were going
to wait at the house for me?"

Pacey shrugged.  "I didn't feel like I was very good company.  So
when they all got back early I just. . ."  Another shrug.  
"So. . ."

"So."

"Look, I know this is difficult but I'd rather just get it over
with, okay.  I know it's over."

Joey felt the tears well as her mind flashed to a scene similar to
this one.  The two of them and True Love.  The devastating ache
she'd felt walking away from him.  Leaving behind everything she
truly needed.  The crushing pain she's seen in his expressive eyes
as she'd agreed with him that it was over.  The setting was
similar but tonight would be different.  This time she was not
going to end the night alone and in tears.  "Nothing is over
Pacey.  Especially not us."  She saw the hope flare in his eyes. 
"Let's sit down."  She led him into the boat's half finished
cabin.  "I need to tell you a little story."

                         ~*~
                           
Dawson answered the door and was more than a bit surprise to find
Carson Potter on his front porch.  "Can I come in?"  She pushed
past him before he could answer.  "Thanks."

Dawson hung his head, resigning himself to the lecture he was sure
she was there to deliver.  "What can I do for you, Carson?"

"Well, you can start by explaining to me what you're trying to
accomplish here.  Just who the hell do you think you are, Dawson?"

"You know what, Carson?  I really don't want to hear a lecture on
the wonders of Pacey Witter, okay?"  He started to walk away.

"He loves her, Dawson."  Carson stated quietly.  "But he'd walk
away if that was what it would take to make her happy.  Can you
say the same?"

Dawson couldn't move.  How dare she try to compare his lifelong
relationship with Joey to some hormonal overload of Pacey's.  "You
don't have a clue what you're talking about, Carson."

"I know he loves her.  And I'm pretty sure she loves him.  Now to
me, that sounds like a good thing."

"I don't want to see Joey get hurt." Dawson said, self
righteously.

"Oh, well, then just as long as you're only thinking of Joey."
Carson sneered sarcastically.  "Don't pull that crap with me,
Dawson.  Both Pacey and Joey deserve a lot more than derision and
scorn from you.  If you're half the friend you purport yourself to
be then you will get down off your bruised ego and wounded
feelings and be happy that two people you care about have found
some happiness together."

"I think you should leave, Carson."  She shook her head in
disappointment and turned to leave.  "Oh, and Carson?"  She turned
back hopefully.  "Next time tell Pacey to fight his own damn
battles."  Dawson closed the door securely in her face. 

                         ~*~
                           
"So we sailed away and lived happily ever after?"  Pacey whispered
almost reverently.

Joey nodded.  "We were on our way back up the coast when I woke
up." 

"And we were happy?"

Joey moved to kneel in front of his chair.  "We were perfect." 
She reached up and brushed a stray tear from his cheek.   

Pacey pulled her up into his arms.  "God, Jo!"  He clasped her
tightly.  He was having a hard time assimilating it all.  Joey
wanted to be with him!  Dawson had issued his ultimatum and she
chose him!  He smiled into her hair.  And that dream!  He would
never be grateful for the accident.  But would Joey have realised
her love for him if it hadn't been for that incredible dream?  How
long would he have had to continue loving her in silence if it
hadn't happened?  And how would she have handled Dawson if she
hadn't already seen the havoc his ultimatum would create?  No, he
would never be grateful for the accident, but he could still thank
the fates for the events that brought them together.  He pressed a
feather-soft kiss on the side of her neck.  "I love you," he
whispered reverently.

Joey pulled back slightly so she could see his eyes.  "And I love
you."  She smiled shyly.  "You have no idea how much."

Pacey kissed her then.  Slowly, gently, taking his time to learn
her taste, the feel of her velvety lips as they clung to his. 
Their kisses grew more fevered, more passionate their tongues
battling for dominance as they lost themselves in each other.  As
Joey reached for the buttons of his shirt Pacey could feel his
control slipping away.  He broke the kiss, panting and shaking. 
"God!"

Joey shivered in his arms.  "Why did you stop?"

Pacey brushed her hair from her face.  "Because.  Even though you
may have a dream memory of us aboard this boat and of the
relationship we built on our trip, none of it is true."  He held
up a finger to silence her protests.  "I am *not* going to screw
this up, Jo.  I can't.  It would kill me.  We have all the time in
the world to get to the point we were at in your dream.  To build
real memories.  To build a real life together.  And I promise it
will be better than any dream."

Joey smiled up at him her eyes filled with love and tears.  "Have
I mentioned that I think you're wonderful?"

"Yeah, well, it's about time you figured it out."  He ducked as
she took a playful swing at him.  "Hey watch it, woman!  Don't
damage the merchandise."

"Shut up and kiss me, Witter."  Joey shifted and twisted until she
was comfortably settled in his arms. 

"Yes, dear."

The end Never, Neverland part 9/10

I would love to hear what you think.

kayjay@sunwave.net