True Life Incidents (supposedly)
I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center. Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants.
I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital. She calmed down, and at the end of the conversation happened to
mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants. I told her that
she better bring her daughter in to the ER right away.
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Seems that a year ago, some Boeing employees on the field decided to steal a life raft from one of
the 747s. They were successful in getting it out of the plant and home. When they took it for a
float on the Stilliguamish River, they were quite surprised by a coast guard helicopter homing in
on the emergency locator that is activated when the raft is inflated. They are no longer employed
there.
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The instructor was demonstrating the wonders of static electricity to his class at MIT. While
holding a plastic rod in one hand and a wool cloth in the other, he told the class, "You can see
that I get a large charge from rubbing my rod..." That was pretty much the end of learning for
that day.
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I worked for a while at a Wal-Mart store, selling sporting goods. As an employee of Wal-Mart
you are sometimes required to make store-wide pages, e.g.,"I have a customer in hardware who
needs assistance at the paint counter." One night a tentative female voice came over the intercom
system with the (I kid you not) following message: "I have a customer by the balls in toys who
needs assistance."
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A police officer had a perfect hiding place for watching for speeders.
But one day, everyone was under the speed limit, the officer found the problem: a 10 year old
boy was standing on the side of the road with a huge hand painted sign which said "RADAR
TRAP AHEAD." A little more investigative work led the officer to the boy's accomplice,
another boy about 100 yards beyond the radar trap with a sign reading "TIPS" and a bucket at his
feet, full of change.