BUMPER STICKERS

- Auntie Em. Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog - Dorothy

- We're staying together for the sake of the cats.

- It's been lovely, but I have to scream now.

- My karma ran over your dogma.

- Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.

- This is not an abandoned vehicle.

- I don't lie, cheat or steal unnecessarily.

- Beautify Texas - Put a Yankee on a bus.

- Welcome to Texas, now go home.

- It's as bad as you think and they are out to get you.

- If you don't like the news, go out and make some of your own.

- My wife says if I go fishing one more time,she's going to leave me. Gosh, I'm going to miss her.

- I is a college student.

- Beer isn't just for breakfast any more.

- Sorry, I don't date outside my species.

- Eschew obfuscation.

- Will Rogers never met a lawyer.

- Happiness is seeing your mother-in-law's face on the back of a milk carton.

- It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.

- Don't steal - The government hates competition.

- Is there life before coffee?

- Never play leap frog with a unicorn.

- Cover me - I'm changing lanes.

- The weather is here - Wish you were beautiful.

- I Cayman went.

- My other wife is beautiful.

- I need someone really bad - Are you really bad?

- Smile - It's the second best thing you can do with your lips.

- Don't laugh - Your daughter could be in this vehicle.

- Geez if you belive in honkus.

- Friends don't let friends drive naked.

- Save California; when you leave take someone with you.

- I came, I saw, I did a little shopping.

- There's one in every crowd and they always find me.

- If money could talk, it would say goodbye.

- When you're in love, you're at the mercy of a stranger.

- Just when you think you've won the rat race along come faster rats.

- If it's too loud, you're too old.

- Wink - I'll do the rest.

- The worst day fishing is better than the best day working.

- An Irishman is not drunk so long as he can hold on to one blade of grass and not fall off the earth.

- Cynics are people who know the price of everything and the value of nothing.

- Who cares who's on board?

- No radio - Already stolen.

- Crime wouldn't pay if the government ran it.

- Want a taste of religion? Bite a minister.

- Carlsbad Caverns: 22% more cavities.

- Honk if you love cheeses.

- Flying saucers are real, the Air Force doesn't exist.

- I don't care who you are, what you are driving, or where you would rather be.

- So many pedestrians, so little time.

- Honk if you're illiterate

- My kid can beat up your honor student

- Fight crime, shoot back

- Guns don't kill people postal workers do.

- It's not how you pick your nose, it's where you put the boogers.

- It's not how you pick it, but where you flick it

- If you don't like the way I drive, get off the sidewalk!

- Grow your own dope, plant a man.

- My wife's other car is a broom

- Go ahead and honk - I'm reloading

- This car is like my husband, if it ain't yours don't touch it!

- Give Blood Play Hockey

- I like cats, they taste just like chicken

- Fleece on earth, good wool to ewe

- Thank God for the IRS - Without them I'd be stinking rich!

- If there is a tourist season, why can't we shoot them

- Nonconformists are all alike

- Horn broken - Watch for finger -

- Hug your kids at home - belt them in the car!

- Hit me, I need money

- The kids drive me crazy, I drive them everywhere

- My honor student fired your stupid kid

- Body by Nautilus; brain by Mattel

- Car will explode upon impact

- I didn't work my way to the top of the food chain to eat vegetables

- Don't Piss me Off - i'm running out of places to hide the bodies.

- Why am I the only person on earth that knows how to drive?

- don't laugh at these fogged up windows it's yourdaughter in here

- Ask me about microwaving cats for fun and profit

- Scientists say 1 out of every 4 people is crazy, check 3 friends, if they are ok, your it

- My other car is a Zamboni

- CAUTION : Driver Singing

- My child was inmate of the month at the county jail

- support mental health or i'll kill you

- Do what you did when you were a kid: fly a kite, go fishing, hunt a dinosaur

- if you can read this, you're in phaser range

- Driver carries only $20 worth of ammunition

- I've found Jesus..........He's in my trunk

- If we were'nt meant to eat animals, why are they made of meat?

- Don't steal.. The government does not like the competition.=

- Women Like Simple Things In Life......Men!

- Never Underestimate The Power Of Stupid People In Large Groups

- Missing, Husband And Dog; Attention $100.00 Reward For Dog

- Hire Teenagers while they still know everything!

- When blondes have more fun, do the know it?

- Hang up and drive

- YOU!!! Out of the gene pool

- Sometimes I wish life had subtitles

- Madness takes its toll--please have exact change ready

- Us blondes aren't bumb.

- Back Up My Hard Drive? How do I Put it in Reverse?

- I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

- When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.

- Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.

- Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

- I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

- He's not dead, He's electroencephalographically challenged.

- She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the June Flower.

- You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.

- I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.

- Honk if you love peace and quiet.

- Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular?

- Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool.

- A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

- Save the whales. Collect the whole set.

- Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

- On the other hand, you have different fingers.

- Change is inevitable. Except from a vending machine.